Thirty-Six

Tuesday was one of the longest, drag worthy days of school yet. It was partially my fault for not paying attention to my lectures and staring at the clock as I waited for each class to end. I would take the number of minutes left in class, divide it by half, then divide that in half, and then divide that in half, giving me tiny time periods to make it through until the bell rang. And the more I focused on the time, the slower it went, and the more the day dragged on.

First period was nice since I got to skip it and sleep in, but that was mainly Jeanie's fault. The moment I got home, she wanted to hear all about the date, and she refused to let me go to bed until I told her everything. While I'm sure she was excited for me, it was obvious she was more interested in what the date actually was. She didn't guess a date in a ball pit either.

All of my boring classes were lecture days. I did my best to focus on writing my notes, but my eyes always wandered over to the clock. Since Devon shared some of my classes, I stared at him occasionally, which sped time by thinking of him instead. When he winked subtly at me in the middle of biology, he clearly knew what I was thinking about. That or he was thinking of it in a blue balls fashion. Either way, I didn't care. I winked back.

When the bell rang at the end of class, he swam past our classmates and sat at the desk in front of mine. "Did the lesson make you think of me?"

I scoffed. "Why think that?"

"Because it was all about human anatomy," he smirked.

I tsked. "You wish." Standing up, we exited the classroom to head to my English class. "I may have been staring at you, but it was an accident."

He snorted. "Gee, thanks, Mel."

"That's not what I meant," I laughed. "I was bored, and I caught myself staring at you." I blushed. "I thought about last night."

He grabbed my hand, squeezing it gently. "I was thinking about it, too. It was the best date I've ever been on."

"I thought it was the only date you've ever been on?"

"Same goes for you."

"And right now, it's at the top of my list."

"Guess I'm going to have to work hard to make the next one just as great. Maybe even better."

"Don't stress over it. I'm simple. Why don't we watch a movie tomorrow night? It will have to be at your house."

"Sounds like a plan." We stopped in front of my classroom, and he kissed my cheek. "I'll see you in Math."

"Bye."

"Aww," Darcy cooed as she poked her head out the door. "You two are so cute!"

"Quit fawning over us and give your girlfriend some attention."

"She wants another double date," she said as I walked to my desk.

"Tell her we'll have to play it by ear. I have my first rehearsal tonight, and things are about to get even crazier."

"That's what I told her. She's hoping to come to a concert and hang out afterwards or something," she shrugged. "I told her we'd be at the first concert we can go to."

I smiled. "I will let you know once I do."

"Do you know when your first concert is going to be?"

"Next weekend. This weekend, Lucy and Amanda are going on a couple retreat to a spa or something. Calm before the storm or something."

"Would you go to a spa with Devon?" she asked, wiggling her eyebrows.

"I wouldn't go to a spa on my own," I snorted. "Maybe if it's something he really wanted to do, but I prefer self-care at home. It's just as relaxing, and it's cheap."

"That's not as much fun."

"Spas aren't fun."

"Yes, they are."

"No, they are not."

Class went on like all the others, what with it being more a lecture class than anything really enjoyable. But with Darcy in the class, I could glance at her and find her making a funny face, either at me or the teacher. It helped pass the time. When I made it to Math, the day went on as boring as all the others. Only I had Devon continuously glancing at me, smirking. I returned every look with one of my own. It was a miracle Mx. Jason didn't say a word about it.

When the bell rang, I stayed behind to let the rush out first. Whether I tried to push past my classmates or wait for them all to leave first, it would take the same amount of time. Buddy and Devon stayed back as well, and Buddy plopped down at Nellie's desk in front of me.

"I'm surprised you're sitting here instead of being the first one out the door," he teased.

"It's better to wait for everyone to leave than try to push past them. No matter what, I'll be on time. I even plan to be early."

"What are you going to do if no one's home?"

"Lucy texted me during lunch. She said she was home all day and would let me in. It'll give us time to talk or something. I want to know my band on a personal level. So far, Nate and I have bonded, and James and I both have respective relationships with Petula. Lucy's the last one to win over."

"You say it like you offended her," Devon chuckled. "Don't tell me you have?"

"No, no. I just mean as a friend. Right now, I'm just her drummer, and she's my bassist. I want us to be friends. We're going to be the only girls in the band- Well..."

Buddy and Devon glanced at each other. "Well?" they asked.

"Well... No, yeah, we're the only girls in the band. We're just not the only feminine ones."

"What?" Buddy asked.

"You'll just have to wait until you see one of my concerts."

"Which will be the first one I can attend."

"Same," Devon nodded. He stood up, flung his bag over his shoulder, and held out his hand. "Should I drive you?"

"Actually, Buddy already agreed. I didn't want you to be late for work."

He smiled and lowered his hand. "No problem." He leaned forward to kiss me, and we met in the middle. "Text me after, okay?"

"Sure thing."

Buddy smirked at me and sang, "What happened this weekend?"

"We had our first date yesterday," I said, then proceeding to tell him everything as we walked to the parking lot. "And now we're officially boyfriend and girlfriend."

"It wasn't official before?"

"I mean, we were officially dating, but now we've agreed on titles and stuff."

"Titles and stuff," he snickered under his breath. "Yeah, alright. I'm happy for you."

"Thanks," I whispered. "And thanks for driving me, too. Honestly, even if it weren't for Devon needing to go to work, I would have wanted you to drive me to practice."

"Really?" he asked, looking bashful yet prideful. "How come?"

"We haven't hung out in a while. It's a nice chance to catch up."

"True. Now that you have your boyfriend and stuff,"–I playfully slapped his arm, and he slapped mine right back–"to walk you to class, we never talk."

"I do like talking with you. You're always there when I need to rant about something or talk my problems out. It was hard when we were fighting, because all I wanted to do was talk it out, but I couldn't."

He glanced at me as he switched lanes. "I wanted to talk about us, too, but you were the only person I wanted to talk about it with."

Blinking quickly, I said, "Shut up. I don't need to be emotional before my first rehearsal."

Buddy chuckled. "That's what friends are for. To embarrass each other and make them emotional at inconvenient times."

"Oh, well no wonder you're my best friend, then."

Buddy pulled up in front of Lucy's house. "Call me if you need a ride home."

I nodded. "See you tomorrow."

I hugged Buddy before exiting the car and hopping up to the front door. I knocked, and Lucy answered. She quirked an eyebrow. "Shouldn't you be in school?"

"I get out at two-thirty," I murmured.

She shrugged before stepping out of the doorway. She led me inside the large house. It had a grand foyer with a formal spiral staircase. There was a large living room without a TV. There was a dip in the white floors, leading to a blood red couch with a white table in the middle. The windows were from floor to ceiling, with those glass pane stickers covering it. She led me through the spacious kitchen with an entire wall set up as a wine rack. She slid out the back kitchen doors to the wide backyard with a pool and hot tub connected, and a large shed that was the band's practice room.

She opened the door and let me in first. The walls were covered with stick-on soundproof plasters. The drum kit was blocked with a drum shield. Amplifiers were stacked against the walls with an electric guitar, and acoustic guitar, and Lucy's bass already plugged in. An old blues microphone stood in the middle of the dark hardwood floors. And a keyboard was pushed to the side with its own microphone connected. Their band logo was plastered on a tapestry that hung on the back wall, over the windows and on my drum kit. A few movie posters for music biopics were taped onto the walls, and the door was covered in bumper stickers.

Lucy pointed to an old brown couch against the wall, and I dropped my backpack in the corner before sitting down. She plopped down next to me and opened a mini fridge next to her, pulling out a cane sugar coke and popping the cap off. She handed it to me, and I thanked her. She grabbed her own, took a sip, and leaned her head back.

"I thought high schoolers got out at three-thirty."

I shook my head. "Didn't you graduate three years ago?"

"Yeah, but I blocked out high school. It sucked."

I sighed. "I know the feeling."

"Yeah? Been bullied?"

"All the time. Is it rude if I ask if it was because you're a lesbian?"

She shook her head. "Nah. It's true. I went to a catholic school- that might be why we got out later. Oh well," she shrugged. "I have nothing against religion or religious people. The only people I have a problem with are people who make fun of me for being born gay. Let me tell ya, Mel, if I could choose to be gay or not, I'd choose to be gay, because women make better lovers than men."

I didn't doubt her. Women knew what they liked and what made them feel good. Plus, they knew where the fucking clitoris was, so they would be better at giving their partner an orgasm.

"I bet they do." I dramatically sighed. "Too bad I was cursed with the straight gene."

Lucy tsked with a smirk. "Too bad indeed. What about your partner? Are you even dating anyone?"

"I am. He's attracted to feminine people regardless of gender. It's just about femininity for him."

"Better hide him from James."

I snorted. "Not gonna lie, that was one of the first things that went through my mind when I first saw him."

"You like his fashion sense?"

"Yeah."

"I taught him everything he knows."

"Really?"

"Yeah," she chuckled. "We knew each other because he gave me piano lessons at his house. I played for about six months before I gave up and started playing bass. Never looked back. But we ran into each other at the H&M at Woodfield Mall, and I caught him staring at all the girl's clothes. Right away, my first thought was that he was a girl and was afraid to come out. I felt bad for him. I was still in the closet but it was like the door was open, you know? I thought I found someone I could relate to, but I wasn't ready to come out yet. Instead, I just started texting him, and we'd meet up and play music together. We became good friends. I'd call him girly nicknames, and he'd call me butch names.

"I'll admit that I started to feel an attraction to him, the only boy I ever did. I manifested this idea of a woman onto him and saw him as a girl. We began to do some more... I guess FWB stuff. I wanted to test the waters and see if he would come out to me as a woman, so I told him I was a lesbian. I thought he would realize that I accepted him for who he was, and he'd tell me what female name he preferred to go by." She sighed. "I felt so guilty when I saw the heartbreak on his face. He asked if he was nothing but a beard to me, and I tried to explain what I thought I knew. He just laughed after that, laughed for what felt like hours. He was still hurt, but he found it to be sweet."

"What is he then?"

"He's a man. Solely identifies as male, but he likes to wear female clothes. He told me he likes cross-dressing, but he never felt comfortable doing it in public. It was why he was looking at the clothes. Because he wants to be seen as a more feminine person. I told him I didn't see anything wrong with that, and while I still felt an attraction to him, it subsided, and we went our own ways romantically. He's now with Petula, and I'm with Amanda."

"When did he dress femininely all the time?"

"I was a senior. He was going to be a sophomore. I first taught him how to wear makeup that actually worked with his face and made his eyes pop. He kept looking like Boy George, and while he's cute, it's not the look he was going for. Once he was comfortable wearing makeup, he wore the clothes, too. I think once he wore the clothes, he felt better about himself. People made fun of him all the time for wearing makeup, and he felt partially exposed. But once he put on the clothes, it was like his armor. He wound up being so confident that he by the time he was a junior, he had a little freshman wrapped around his finger that liked to call him Daddy."

"I thought they didn't start dating until last year? That's what Petula told me. She even dated someone else before him."

"They did. There was an obvious attraction between them, but she thought she didn't have a chance, so they remained friends. He liked art like her. Maybe not as much, but she helped him appreciate it more. She cheated on her last boyfriend with him because she was always attracted to him. The last guy was a rebound, and he knew it. Pissed him off, but I bet he was more mad at himself than her. There went the girl he wanted to be with, leaving him for a cross dresser with the voice of an angel."

The things you learn about your friends. The cheating aspect surprised me for sure, but I didn't see Petula differently. I knew what sort of person she was. She was a sweetheart through and through. She just made a mistake, one I'm sure she's grown from. I bet that boy moved on, too. At least Petula and James were happy together.

"I heard the crossdressing voice of an angel," James smirked as he stepped into the shed. He stared right at us. "Did you summon me?"

"Just telling Mel about how we met. It turned into a conversation about how you and Petula got together."

James blushed as he glanced away from us. "I have to say, I am a bit embarrassed."

"Why?" I asked.

"We were in an art museum, seeing a photography exhibit by an old classmate of hers, and I wound up being a date since Roy couldn't make it. I'd liked her for two years, and I assumed nothing was ever going to happen between us. It seemed like I was always going to be her best friend."

"Isn't it true, though, that she'd call you Daddy in private to get a rise out of you?" Lucy smirked.

"All the time," he laughed. "I should have known she was flirting. But I'm glad I didn't, because it may have ruined what we are now. Still, she was with Roy, and at the end of the date, I went to kiss her cheek, and she moved to kiss my lips. I should have pulled away, but we were making out on her front porch for hours."

"He means he thinks it was hours," Lucy snorted.

"It definitely felt like it," he agreed. "I was going to apologize, but she wouldn't let me. She called me the next day, told me she told Ryan, and that they broke up, and we had sex." He hummed. "As nice as it was, it still felt a bit messy. But I wouldn't trade it for anything. My princess means the world to me, and the fact that she's mine makes me feel like jelly all the time."

"Is that how it feels with Amanda?" I asked.

"Nah. We're more chill. I enjoy the time we spend together, but it's not a Hallmark movie like with them," she snickered. "We feel a sense of peace when we're around each other. It feels easy, like how love's supposed to be. You know?"

I couldn't say I did. Maybe it was because I didn't love Devon. I certainly liked him, or else we wouldn't have been going out together. But even if you liked someone romantically, it should have been easy like Lucy said. But it wasn't. It was stressful wondering how much time we'd have to be together, wondering if I would be able to fit him into my schedule. Wondering if I was a bad person for agreeing to give things a try, despite knowing it was better for me to wait until I knew what my future would be. So, no, I didn't know what she meant. And I doubted I ever would.