Bound By The Past: Part 4 – Chapter 5

Eight months later

Bibi was a gorgeous bride. She was practically glowing. At her first wedding, she’d cried horrified tears in the bathroom after the ceremony. Today, she smiled and even though I could tell that she was nervous and a bit overwhelmed by the attention, she exuded happiness. Dario towered over her, dressed in a dark suit, his dark hair short and beard accurately trimmed. His expression was steel, a mask he’d probably developed as a lawyer for the mob.

Sofia, Anna, and Luisa were flower girls and looked adorable in their matching pink dresses. It wasn’t a big feast, only about one hundred guests and a celebration in the garden of Bibi’s mansion. To many people’s surprise, Dario had agreed to move into the house. His own penthouse wasn’t a good place for a family and his older brother had inherited the family mansion.

I tried to entertain Leonas, rocking him and singing his favorite song as I watched Bibi and Dario accept the congratulations of the crowd. Even Bibi’s parents seemed mollified by her second marriage. Not that those two had any business to shove their noses into Bibi’s life ever again.

Leonas squirmed in my hold, unhappy with being carried. It was early August and he was already quite mobile at eight months, pulling himself up all the time. He wanted to explore the garden on his own but with so many people around I couldn’t let him crawl over the lawn.

My eyes found Maria who was trying to calm down her crying two-months-old baby boy. Rocco was talking to Dante and my father near the bar, obviously unconcerned about his young wife’s distress. The girl was twenty and had not only been forced into a marriage with Rocco but also gotten pregnant almost immediately. It was obvious that she was overwhelmed. In the few times, I’d seen her since she’d given birth, she’d always looked close to tears.

I headed over to her with the still squirming Leonas and gave her an encouraging smile when I arrived at her side. “Hey Maria, are you all right?”

She nodded quickly. “Hello Mrs. Ca—”

“Please call me Val. No need for formalities. I’m not that much older than you.”

Rocco Jr. had quieted down in his mother’s arm, obviously fascinated by Leonas’ antics. An idea crossed my mind. “Why don’t you come over now and then so our boys can play together? Once they grow older the six months between them won’t be as obvious.”

Her face lit up. “Of course, if Rocco allows it.”

Already now I found it incredibly weird that both her husband and her son were called Rocco. This had been a common practice in the mob in the past but it just showed how obnoxious Rocco Scuderi was, and he really didn’t have the slightest reason to be.

“I can’t imagine him having anything against you meeting with the Capo’s wife and son,” I said with a smile. Fabiano headed our way. He had grown and was as tall as me. His boyish features had become harsher, vigilant and as I’d noticed before he walked as if his ribs hurt him. I’d have to have another talk to Dante about this. Making the boy strong for his future tasks was one thing, but abusing him was another.

“Do you want me to take him a bit?” he asked Maria.

She bit her lip. “You know your dad doesn’t like that.”

Fabiano’s mouth tightened but he nodded.

“How about you hold Leonas, Fabiano? Then I can cuddle with Rocco for a bit.”

Fabiano nodded and took Leonas from me. It was obvious that he’d held his little brother often in the last two months because he made sure to support my son the right way, even though Leonas was already way more mobile than Rocco.

“Can I?” I asked Maria who nodded, a look of gratefulness passing her face. I cradled her son in my arms and his eyes zeroed in on me. “Is it okay if I freshen up and grab a drink while you take care of him?”

“Of course,” I said.

Maria left quickly, not looking back. I felt pity for her.

“How are things with your initiation?”

Fabiano looked up, startled. “Good, I suppose?” Caution filled his eyes. “Am I allowed to talk to you about it?”

I let out a small laugh at his confusion. He was such a teenager. “Well, I’m the Capo’s wife.”

“Yeah…” He shrugged. “My father expects a lot from me before he wants to allow me to become a Made Man and take the tattoo.”

It was so typical of the Outfit to keep up the tattoo rumors among initiates and people who weren’t Made Men when Fiore had stopped the tradition a long time ago. The Capo in the Outfit had never taken a tattoo, only his soldiers, but even that had been small in comparison to the ones from the Famiglia and Camorra, only a tiny chrysanthemum at their neck hidden by their hairline. It was supposed to show that the man had already been marked by death and didn’t fear it because chrysanthemum were funeral flowers in our tradition. Fiore then decided that it was better not to show their association with the mob in any way, which was also why insisted in calling himself Boss, not Capo. Many people still called Dante the Boss even though he’d switched back to Capo.

“Maybe it’s a good thing that you’ll be older. It’s a tough life.”

Fabiano grimaced and looked back down at Leonas who was trying to squirm out of his hold. “He isn’t happy on my arm.”

“He isn’t happy on anyone’s arm right now. He wants to crawl.”

Rocco Jr. on the other hand had fallen asleep in my arms. He had the dark eyes and hair of the Scuderi family, not Fabiano’s lighter looks inherited from his mother’s side of the family.

Rocco and Dante headed our way. Fabiano became tense at once but I only smiled.

“What’s going on?” Rocco asked pleasantly. That tone was one he used because Dante and I were around. I had a feeling his words would have been harsher if he’d been alone with Fabiano because the look he gave the boy was chilling.

“I asked Maria if I could hold your son for a little while, because he’s such a cute baby, and Fabiano had to help me with Leonas in the meantime, which he generously agreed to do. Right, Fabiano?”

Fabiano nodded. “Yes.”

Rocco frowned. “Where’s Maria?”

“She went to the restrooms. Oh, I asked her if we could meet once a week so our sons could grow up together. I hope you agree.”

The stern look was replaced by pride. “Of course.”

“I can take him now,” Dante said to Fabiano and took Leonas from him. Leonas briefly stopped his fussing but then he tried to get to the floor again. “He’s got his own head,” Dante said with a chuckle.

“You can give me my son now too, Valentina. I’m sure you’d like to grab a drink,” Rocco said politely, stretching out his hands. I had to stifle a snort. When I handed Rocco Jr. to him it became apparent that he didn’t hold him very often and only tried to imitate Dante. I didn’t comment.

Rocco knew what face to show to Dante and me, but I also knew how he was behind the closed door. When I’d still been in contact with Aria, she had admitted it to me.

I didn’t trust him one bit.

Eight months later

Leonas stormed out of his room before I could grab him, completely naked. I rushed after him, laughing. “Freeze!”

He didn’t of course. It was his newest hobby to tear down his clothes and diaper, and run through the house until someone caught him.

My heart almost skipped a beat when he stumbled down the staircase. He was already very steady on his legs at seventeen months but steps were another matter.

Anna poked her head out of her room with wide eyes, a crayon in her hand as usual.

Leonas laughed even louder as he half fell down the stairs. Luckily Dante stood at the base of the staircase, probably alerted by the noise and snatched Leonas up before he could make a faceplant.

I caught my breath halfway down the staircase. “He’s quick.”

Dante scanned Leonas with an exasperated smile. “You have to listen to your mom and you need to keep your clothes on.”

Leonas giggled as if that was the funniest thing he’d ever heard.

Dante in his posh three-piece suite holding a butt naked Leonas was an adorable sight.

I was sweaty from trying to wrangle our son into clothes three times in a row.

Dante took one look at me then said. “How about I get him dressed?”

He walked up the stairs until he reached me then kissed my mouth, lingering a bit longer, the look in his eyes telling me he wished we had some alone time. I wasn’t sure what he found sexy about my sweaty look but didn’t care.

“Good luck,” I said. Leonas obeyed his father better than me but at the moment, he was testing his limits. “I’ll check on Anna. Her piano teacher comes over in thirty minutes and I have a feeling she hasn’t practiced her song yet.”

“Drawing again?” Dante asked as we walked up the stairs beside me. I was glad he worked from home often so he could be there for our children. Many fathers were mostly absent from their offspring’s life but that wasn’t something I wanted. Anna and Leonas both loved spending time with him.

“She’s talented. Maybe we should consider getting her an art teacher as well.”

Dante nodded. “That might be a good idea.” I gave Leonas a small wave before I headed into Anna’s room. As expected she sat at her desk, hunched over a piece of paper, drawing a flower field. She was only four but already focused and driven when it came to art.

She briefly looked up when I came in and squatted beside her. “This is beautiful, love. But did you practice your song for piano lessons?”

She smiled sheepishly as she peered up at me through her thick dark lashes. “Once.”

Her little keyboard lay discarded on her bed.

“Is that a fib?”

Her smile got even more sheepish.

I stood and held out my hand. “Come on. Let’s go downstairs and practice at the piano. I’ll help you.”

Anna set down her crayon, took my hand and followed me outside. Dante wanted our kids to learn a musical instrument, like he and his sisters had done. He considered it a lesson in perseverance and patience. I’d learned to play the piano when I was a girl too, but hadn’t played in years until Anna had started taking lessons a little over a year ago.

The beautiful Steinway piano stood in the center of the library and seeing it always made my heart sing. Anna and I sat beside each other. I wasn’t a very good musician and like Anna, piano lessons had always meant duty not joy. Still I tried to make our piano time a fun adventure for my girl, so she’d maybe discover her love for the beautiful instrument soon. We played a few fun melodies before we started to practice the song her piano teacher had given her as homework.

“Mommy, will daddy be sad if I don’t play the piano?” Anna asked softly.

I paused. “No. But he loves listening to you play. And it’s like learning to write or to count. One day it won’t be difficult anymore and you can just do it without thinking about it.”

Anna considered that then nodded. “Luisa is really good at playing the piano. Much better than me.” I could hear a hint of jealousy. Anna wanted to be the best at everything she did.

“Luisa loves the piano, like you love art. You are the artist, and Luisa is the musician. Everyone’s good at something. That’s wonderful, don’t you think?”

Anna tilted her head and smiled. “Yeah.”

The bell rang. “Wait here. I’ll get the door.”

Anna kept playing as I walked out of the library and toward the front door. Gabby had already opened it and Luisa and Bibi entered. I stroked Luisa’s head. “Why don’t you go ahead to the library?”

She nodded excitedly and dashed off, her dark pigtails bobbing.

I grinned at Bibi. “You look radiant. Dario’s a magician.”

Bibi turned red.

I laughed. “That makes you blush already? He must be even better than I thought.”

“Val,” Bibi said, giggling.

We didn’t get the chance to continue our conversation because the bell rang again. “On time as always,” I said as the piano teacher Mrs. Gatti, the wife of one of Dante’s soldiers, stepped in. After a small curtsey, which she refused to forgo despite my begging, she headed straight for the library to teach Luisa and Anna.

I led Bibi into the living room for our bi-weekly macarons time. We sank down on the sofa. “Have you thought about the homeschooling?”

Bibi nodded. “Yes. I’d like Luisa and Anna to be taught together.”

“Perfect. I’ll arrange everything.” Dante wanted Anna to be homeschooled until she was ten or twelve because the current situation worried him and I wanted Anna to have her friend at her side. Being around adults all the time wasn’t good for a child her age.

Bibi looked at me as if she was holding something back. I knew her secretive expression. She really wasn’t good at keeping things from me.

“What is it? Are things not going well with Dario?” I couldn’t imagine it being the case. They appeared happy on the outside but I knew sometimes appearances could be deceiving. Still, Bibi would have told me if something was the matter.

“I wanted to wait a bit longer to tell you, but…”

“You’re pregnant!” I said.

Her lips fell open then she nodded. “Only nine weeks along.”

I wrapped my arms around her. “Oh, Bibi, I’m so happy for you and Dario.”

Dario didn’t have children yet, and Bibi wanted more so I had expected Bibi to become pregnant.

We chatted for more than an hour. Anna and Luisa had gone up to play after their lesson and we used the time for us.

But when Dante stepped into the living room with a forced calm expression, words died in my throat. Something in his eyes set off my alarm bells.

“Good afternoon, Bibiana.”

Bibi got up and glanced at her watch. “I should be going. It’s already late.” It wasn’t later than usual but I appreciated her consideration. I accompanied her to the door. “Anna! Luisa!”

Both girls came down a few minutes later. After a short goodbye, Luisa and Bibi left. Dante held Anna in his arms, listening to her recount of today’s piano lesson. I could tell his mind was far away even as he tried to give Anna his full attention. I walked up to them. Leonas was still down for his nap but he too would be awake soon. I searched Dante’s eyes, wondering what was wrong, but he gave a tight smile. “Let’s have dinner at our favorite place.”

“You sure?”

“Yes. I want us to have a family night out. We can talk later.”

“Okay,” I said with a smile. “I’ll dress up. What about you, Anna? You want to get pretty?”

“Yes!” she shouted.

“Can you make Leonas presentable?”

Dante gave me a look as he set Anna down. “I’ll try my best. He’s given me trouble today.”

I laughed then took Anna’s hand. “The girls need to get ready now.” Anna and I hurried up the stairs and into my walk-in closet where I also kept some of Anna’s prettier outfits.

“I want to look like you!” Anna said.

I bit my lip. Anna loved to wear matching outfits. Many people in the Outfit thought it strange, but I tried to ignore their negative voices. “Okay. Let’s see what we can do.”

I picked a plaid dress for Anna with cute black boots and chose a plaid costume for myself. That way our outfits were similar but didn’t scream twins from afar. Then I braided Anna’s hair. I wasn’t as good at the French braids as Mamma but I tried my best. I let my own down and put on some makeup, then we headed to Leonas’ room.

To my surprise, Dante had managed to dress Leonas in Chino pants and a cute button-down shirt as well as sneakers. He was talking quietly to him. Dante seldom raised his voice at our children and even then he never screamed. Anna had always been an obedient child, so we’d never had reason for strictness, but Leonas was already testing our patience on a daily basis. I wondered how long Dante’s calm approach would work with our son.

I leaned in the doorway, smiling as I held Anna’s hand.

Dante caught me watching then scanned Anna and me appreciatively. “We’re heading to dinner with two beautiful ladies, Leonas, we need to be on our best behavior.” Leonas didn’t pay attention, too distracted by the task of fumbling with Dante’s cuffs.

Our favorite restaurant was an elegant but cozy place with the best steak in town. We got our usual table in a nook where we were shielded from attention.

Leonas and Anna were on their best behavior, as they were most of the time when we were outside. Even Leonas’ tantrums usually happened in the safety of our home.

I could tell that Dante enjoyed our family dinner despite the lingering tension in his expression.

Later that night when we lay in each other’s arms after sex, I asked, “What happened today? You seemed shaken.”

Dante let out a deep sigh that let his chest vibrate under my cheek. “It’s Fabiano. He’s gone.”

I lifted my head to look at Dante’s face in the dim glow of the bedside lamp. “Gone?”

“He’s run off. That’s what Rocco said at least.”

“That’s ridiculous. Fabiano wanted nothing more than to become a Made Man. Why would he run away from that?”

“Rocco thinks he might have followed in his sisters’ footsteps and fled to New York to join the Famiglia.”

I shook my head slowly, but part of me thought maybe Rocco was right. Fabiano loved his sisters, even if their relationship had broken off due to the war. His feelings toward his father, on the other hand, were probably less fond. The man had been treating him even worse since Rocco Jr. had been born. “What do you think?”

Dante ran his fingers through my hair then down my arm and waist. “I fear Rocco might be right. Luca would take Fabiano in if Aria asked him to do it.”

Dante’s lips pinched like they always did when he talked about them. Despite the photos, Luca and Aria still seemed to be going strong. For a while I’d been worried Luca had hurt Aria because she’d completely disappeared from the public, but then we’d found out that she’d given birth to a daughter and had gone into hiding for protection.

I propped myself up on Dante’s chest. “He’s only fourteen, Dante. Have you sent people to look for him?”

“Rocco did. He’s his son.”

“And what happens if they catch him?”

Dante let his head fall back against the cushion and stared up at the ceiling. “By our standards, he’s an initiate, Val. He’s not a child anymore.”

I closed my eyes. Since I had a son, the rules of our world worried me often. Leonas was a little rebel and I honestly hoped he would choose his battles wisely once he was older. “It’s strange though, that Fabiano chooses now to run away. Why didn’t he follow his sisters when they took Liliana in? He could have gone with them. But he tried to stop them.”

“Maybe he didn’t. Maybe it was all staged. You know how I’ve been suspecting we have a mole in the Outfit?”

My eyes opened wide. “You think Fabiano was the mole? But he isn’t even a Made Man yet. His knowledge is limited.”

“His direct knowledge, yes. But he might have overheard many things in the Scuderi mansion.”

“You really think Luca would have used a boy as a spy?”

“If you think Luca would have qualms to put a teenage boy in danger, then I can assure you he doesn’t. And in regard to Fabiano’s worth, I assume his information was better than nothing.”

“But how can we know for sure? What if something happened to the boy?”

“Rocco’s got a few loose contacts to local motorcycle gangs in Luca’s territory. We hope they might pick up something and share information with us in return for goods.”

“Don’t you think it’s horrible how Rocco drove all of his children away? The thought of losing Anna and Leonas like that? It tears my heart out.”

Dante cupped my head, his eyes conveying absolute certainty. “We won’t lose either Anna or Leonas. We’re trying to give them everything they need. I know they’ll always be bound by certain rules and be limited by certain restrictions but I’ll make sure they can have as much freedom as our lifestyle allows. And your love will give them the roots they need.”

“Your love too. Leonas and Anna are always so happy when they get to spend time with you. They love you so much.”

Tenderness flickered in Dante’s eyes. “I’m trying to be a better father than my own. I don’t know if I’m always succeeding.”

“You are,” I said firmly. “How can you even consider comparing yourself to your father. He and you are nothing alike.”

Dante chuckled darkly, his eyes taking in my face almost reverently. “Trust me, Val, I have plenty of my father. But it’s a side of me that you and our children will never get to see.”

I dipped my head forward, nicking his lower lip playfully. “You are everything I want.”

He rolled us over, pressing me into the bed. I slung my leg over his hip. “Can’t let me be on top, can you?” I teased. Dante ground his growing erection against me in response and bit my shoulder lightly. “Don’t play coy, Val. You get wet the moment I force you to surrender.”

God, he was right. I’d tried to ride him a few times out of curiosity but it wasn’t for me. I loved Dante’s dominant side in bed, how he took absolute control. I always got my reward after all.

The next day, the weather was beautiful and warm, the first hint of spring after a too-long winter. Anna and I sat on our bench, dressed in our coats and with a blanket draped over our legs because it was still cold despite the sunshine. Leonas obviously didn’t feel the cold. He ripped his coat off again and threw himself into the sandbox.

Anna giggled, looking up at me. She’d never been this daring and wild. She preferred to watch and consider her actions thoroughly. She snuggled closer to me and hummed the new song she’d learned in her last lesson. My phone vibrated in my coat pocket and seeing Orazio’s name, I took the video call. I wondered if it was an accident because we’d never done a video chat before and even his calls were few and far in between.

I smiled into the lens. “Hi Orazio.”

“Uncle Orazio?” Anna piped up, peering at the screen. Since Anna and Leonas were born, I’d seen my brother frequently. My kids loved him, but his relationship to our father still hadn’t improved.

“Hey Val,” he said, looking and sounding exhausted. His hair was disheveled and dark shadows spread under his eyes. I’d never seen him like that. Orazio always took care of his appearance, which was why so many girls admired him and would have loved to become his wife. “I wanted to call to see Leonas and Anna.”

“Hi!” Anna shouted and waved wildly, almost knocking the phone out of my hand.

Orazio smiled slightly but it was off. What made things even stranger was that he was in a car.

“Where are you?”

He glanced to the passenger side briefly then shook his head. “Nowhere important. How are you? How’s Leonas?”

I held the phone camera toward the sandbox where Leonas was building what looked like a pyramid. “He’s got bees in his bum as usual,” I said then turned the camera back on me and Anna who practically pressed her face against mine.

“When will you visit?” she asked.

Orazio’s eyes darted back to the right then his smile became even tenser. He didn’t reply.

“Did you have another fight with Dad? I don’t understand why you two bullheads can’t get along.” Orazio had managed to wiggle out of his promise to settle down with a wife until now, but Dad was close to exploding because of it.

“It’s too late,” he said.

I frowned. “Is it really so bad to marry someone Dad suggests? It can work out.”

“I’m going to marry in a few weeks.”

I wasn’t sure if I’d heard him right. Again his gaze sought whoever sat beside him on the passenger seat. “You want to spring this on our parents?” I whispered. If he married a girl from a soldier family our parents didn’t approve of, that wouldn’t improve his relationship to Papa in the slightest.

“I won’t tell them. They’ll find out, of course, and they won’t approve. Dad has made his standpoint very clear.”

“He knows?”

Orazio laughed darkly. “He doesn’t know that I’m going to marry, or that Lucy and I are together but he knows of Lucy.” The bitter, furious note to his voice startled me.

Anna sank back down, obviously bored by the topic when my insides practically burned up with curiosity and dread. “Lucy?” I repeated. Maybe it was short for Lucilla? Or another Italian name, but deep down I knew it wasn’t.

I swallowed. “You’re in love with an Outsider?”

Orazio grimaced. Suddenly I realized that this call was meant as a goodbye. I felt it deep down. If Orazio was marrying an Outsider, Papa would disinherit him. Unless I could convince Dante to talk to him, even if family matters were off limits for a Capo, but he could do it as son-in-law. “Maybe—”

“No,” Orazio said. “I have to leave, Val. There’s no other way.”

The truth I didn’t want to believe. I lowered my voice. “Orazio, you know the consequences of running away. That’s betrayal.”

Dante may not send out many men to search for Orazio as a favor to me, so maybe my brother could stay undetected. But what could he work? He’d never done anything but been a Made Man. “Let me talk to Dad and Dante. You know that there have been exemptions in the past where Made Men were allowed to marry outsiders.”

“Low soldiers, not the heir to Chicago,” Orazio corrected. “And trust me, there won’t be an exemption for Lucy.”

He glanced toward the side then nodded and a gorgeous girl came into view with pitch black hair… and an exotic face. An Asian girl. No, Dad would never accept her, nor would the still very traditional Outfit. I’d heard enough off-handed comments at social gatherings to know the lingering racism in our circles.

I forced a smile. “Hi Lucy.”

She smiled shyly, then peered up at my brother, and the look that passed between them made me realize nothing could stop Orazio. Nor would I want to get between them.

“Nice to meet you, Valentina,” Lucy said in a soft voice.

Could love ever be a crime? Could wanting to be with your love no matter what be considered betrayal?

“I’ll put in a good word for you with Dante. If you run off to Europe, maybe England, you could be safe.”

Lucy bit her lip, giving my brother a pained look. “I wish we could have met in person.” With that, she disappeared from view.

Orazio’s expression became tight. “Valentina, I’m sorry that I blamed you for my problems with Dad. You did your duty to marry again and somehow that made me even madder for a while. I’m glad I got to see Anna and Leonas one more time.”

“What’s going on, Orazio? I don’t understand.”

“I’m in a safe place so you can tell Dante what I just told you. You don’t have to think you need to protect me. Bye.”

“Bye, Uncle Orazio!” Anna called.

I couldn’t say anything, only watched the screen go black, feeling completely confused. Leonas came running my way, grinning but his good mood didn’t reach me. I stood and caught him as he threw himself into my arms, glad for the distraction and the necessary time it gave me to sort my thoughts. I didn’t understand what Orazio meant with a safe place. Was he already out of the States? For some reason, I didn’t think he was. The small part of the car I’d seen had looked like Orazio’s BMW.

Anna jogged after me as I walked back into the house. Leonas dropped sand everywhere. “Mom, I’m hungry,” he chimed.

“First, we need to change your diaper.”

Leonas shook his head wildly but I carried him up to his room anyway.

“Who was that girl with Uncle Orazio?” Anna blurted as she followed hot on my heels.

I put Leonas down on the changing table despite his protests. My clothes and the table were covered in sand, and I cursed myself inwardly for being so lost in my thought that I didn’t clean him in the bathroom first.

“Mommy?” Anna asked, standing on her tiptoes and holding onto the edge of the table.

I smiled shakily. “That was his friend.”

“Like Luisa and Sofia are my friends?”

“Yes, like that,” I said.

After changing Leonas’ diaper, we headed downstairs into the kitchen. Zita was in the utility room ironing Dante’s shirts and it was Gabby’s day off, so I had the kitchen to myself. To distract myself and because Anna and Leonas loved them, I prepared French toast with a vanilla-mascarpone crème on top.

Anna helped me whisk the eggs while Leonas dipped his fingers into the sugar and licked them clean. They loved their learning tower and I loved that it gave them the chance to feel involved when I cooked. We settled at the table and both Leonas and Anna dug in eagerly. They looked utterly content, their faces dusted with sugar and cream. I tried to cling to the sense of peace I felt watching them but my worry over Orazio soon took over. On the one hand, I was happy for him, happy that he’d found someone he loved, but on the other hand, I worried for his future, for his life. What if this was a spur of the moment thing? How long had he even known Lucy? Was she really worth leaving everything behind for? He couldn’t just change his mind in a few months when things didn’t work out. He’d be considered a traitor and… God, would Dante really kill my brother? What about Papa?

I closed my eyes, terrified for my brother, for my family.

A hand on my shoulder shook me out of my reverie and my eyes shot open. Dante towered over me, his blond brows pulled together in obvious worry. “Are you all right?”

“Mom made us French toast!” Anna said brightly. Dante stroked her hair but his eyes remained on me.

Leonas raised his arms and after a moment Dante bent down and picked him up. For a second, I allowed myself to enjoy the heartwarming scene of Dante holding our son carefully in his arms. I hadn’t eaten a bit of my French toast, not feeling hungry. “Do you want some?” I motioned at my plate.

Dante shook his head. “Have you heard something from your brother?”

My eyes widened. I stood slowly. “Why?”

Dante became tense, worry settling on his face. “Because he didn’t show up to a meeting with your dad this morning. I thought you might know what’s going on and it seems I was right.”

“He just called. A few minutes ago.”

“And?” Dante asked carefully as he put Leonas down on the floor before he came over to me. He touched my shoulders, searching my eyes. “What did he want?”

I had a feeling Dante knew something was horribly wrong. What was Orazio doing? I glanced at our children, not sure if I wanted to have this conversation in front of them. I picked up my plate and went over to the sink. Dante followed me.

“We did a video-chat and he told me he had to leave… because he was going to marry a girl named Lucy,” I whispered.

“Goddamnit,” Dante growled, his face flashing with fury.

“Dante?” Cold fear spread in my body.

The way he looked at me made me worried about what he had to say. “It’s a Chinese girl?”

I shrugged. I wasn’t sure of the girl’s nationality but that Dante knew made me wonder how long he’d known about this. “You knew?”

Dante shook his head but his thoughts seemed miles away. “Before we married, your father mentioned his problems with Orazio to me. It was about that girl. Orazio refused to give her up for a long time until your father finally convinced him.”

“How?”

“I don’t know. I wasn’t Capo back then and even if I had been, I wouldn’t have gotten involved as you know.”

“So they’ve been together for years? That makes sense.”

“Does it?” Dante asked angrily. “Your brother is bound by his vow. By betraying the Outfit he risks the life of fellow Made Men.”

“He only wants to be with the woman he loves. How does it hurt his fellow Made Men if he goes into hiding to be with her?”

Dante’s fingers on my shoulders tightened. “Because you know I suspect that there’s a spy among my soldiers. Maybe it wasn’t Fabiano…”

I exhaled sharply. “You think it could be Orazio?”

Dante sighed and pressed our foreheads together. I wrapped my arms around his waist, trembling. “Tell me he wouldn’t do it.”

I wanted to say it but I’d seen the look that had passed between Orazio and Lucy, and I didn’t want to lie to Dante. “I can’t,” I whispered thickly, my eyes prickling.

“Val,” Dante said quietly, sounding tortured. “If Orazio has been helping the Famiglia…”

I didn’t want to imagine it. I couldn’t.

“Do you know where he might be right now?”

I shook my head. “No. But he was in his car.”

Dante cupped my head and closed his eyes for a moment.

“Please don’t kill him.”

Dante took a deep breath. “I’d do almost anything for you, Val. I’ve chosen you over the Outfit before and part of me wants to do it again, but if Orazio betrayed the Outfit by working with the Famiglia, I have to punish him accordingly.”

“Mamma will be devastated… and Papa. God, I can’t even think about it. Maybe it’s not as we think.” I swallowed, trying hard not to cry, not to lose it before I knew all the details.

Anna headed our way with her empty plate. I blinked hastily and swallowed, then forced a smile. “Do you want Mommy’s toast?”

Anna shook her head. “I’m full.” She glanced between us as if she could sense that something was going on. I’d noticed it before. Anna was perceptive, especially when it came to gauging people’s emotions. It was a beautiful talent but also worrying because I wanted to protect her from so many things in our world and her empathy would make it harder for me to succeed.