Thirty-two

Previously...

"You were with the enemy for four years," I say, glancing at Brandon. "Your girlfriend was the enemy and you didn't realize anything?"

I knew Nova wasn't what she pretended to be. God, I knew it. Even with the lie detector, she was good enough to fool us.

I grit my teeth. Good thing she's dead.

Brandon finally speaks up, raising his head towards me. "How could I? I don't understand how..." He shakes his head and sighs.

"What about the Master?" Britt says, looking at Mr. Neil who hasn't talked yet. "Maybe Vincent Alvarado is the Master."

"Maybe he is," Garry finally declares, raising his head. "But if he knew that Agent Montgomery was coming, he wouldn't have just stayed there for her to notice him so easily."

"He hasn't even looked at me. The Master knows I was coming, or at least that's what I think." I pause, thinking about all of this. "But it would make sense if Vincent Alvarado is the Master, after what happened years ago."

"And what does he want?" Brandon asks, looking at me carefully. "Revenge?"

"I didn't give him what he wanted, did I? He killed you but it didn't work, tried to kill me, and in the end, I threw his little diamond away, making sure he wouldn't be able to get it."

I can tell he's surprised. He didn't know the whole story and still doesn't. I'll probably never tell him any more details of that night because I can't keep thinking about it. Too bad I now have to think about it again.

"What do we do, now?" Britt questions, her eyes going from me to Brandon.

I take a deep breath. I don't know. I don't know what to do anymore. Every time we find out about something, it doesn't feel like we're getting closer to the truth, to the end of all of this. It just feels like we're burying ourselves, and soon, we won't be able to breathe.

However, I must say something, because I'm still the Bird. I'm still the one who's the most involved, even though Brandon has been with the enemy for four years without knowing it.

Even if Mr. Neil has the authority, he still looks at me and waits. So, I open my mouth and say something.

"We find out the whole truth... and we destroy The Circle."

I think I know how to do the first step. I'm just not sure if they will let me.

*

I know it's probably a bad idea. It seems like I've been taking a lot of bad decisions, lately.

But at this point, who cares? If I'm really about to go on with my plan, then...

I need to see him. At least one last time.

I grit my teeth. Who would have thought I would be nervous to stand in front of Brandon's dorm room. Is it just nervousness or something else?

Why do I even feel something? When did it happen?

A while ago.

Closing my eyes, I shake my head. I can still walk away. I can do what I have to do, without telling him anything. However, I feel like I owe him that. I owe him something real. The truth. Or at least, a part of it. I owe it to him and to myself.

After the discussion earlier, Brandon was the first one to leave the room, a blank expression on his face. He must still be pissed after finding out his old girlfriend was the enemy.

I knock on the door. I don't know what to expect. Anger? Coldness? Or nothing of that, because he could be asleep right now.

I'm about to turn and walk away, because things could really get out of hand, knowing how both Brandon and I can be really stubborn or how I could do something I would regret when I hear some muffled noises. A few seconds later, a sleepy Brandon opens the door, running a hand through his messy hair while leaning his arm on the frame. He blinks twice, then focus his icy blue eyes on mine. I can't breathe.

"I was waiting for you, but I guess I fell asleep." He clears his throat, realizing how husky his voice sounds, and crosses his arms over his bare chest. I still haven't said anything.

Why am I here again?

To do something I'll regret? Oh, yeah. Probably. Fuck.

Finally, I find my voice back. "Can I come in? Can we... talk?"

"Of course," he replies, stepping back to let me enter.

"How are you dealing with everything?" I question firstly, because he also learned shocking things tonight, and I hate how everything is always about myself.

I don't even deserve it. Unfortunately, I got to deal with the Bird nickname.

Brandon sits down on his unmade bed. I remember sleeping in this very bed, in his arms, not so long ago. Hence why I prefer to stand in front of him, waiting for his answer.

"I shouldn't have trusted her. I shouldn't have trusted any of them." He shakes his head, his eyes narrowed in anger. "I can't believe I worked for the people who tried to kill me."

"You really never noticed anything sketchy?" I ask, tilting my head in curiosity.

He shrugs. "I followed the orders like I always did. I was feeling... empty. I thought you died, I thought I had nothing left anymore, and that my new home was the East Agency and I had to accept it." Pausing, he raises his head towards me. A rare emotion fills his eyes. "I'm sorry for bringing Nova here. I know you didn't trust her and I know I probably shouldn't have ever got together with her because then, if I hadn't, maybe today we—"

"Brandon," I cut him off quickly before he says something he'll regret. Something that I'll regret. "You thought I died. I get it. You had to move on. I had, too. We... I thought we already talked about this. It doesn't matter anymore."

He slowly shakes his head. "Why are you still pushing me away when you know there is something between us?"

"You know why I'm pushing you away," I whisper softly, my throat tightening. "You told me you finally understood."

A moment passes in complete silence. Brandon's eyes don't leave mine, but I know he's thinking about that night, with me in his arms, his words.

"Sophia..." His voice, so soft, makes me remember.

This is not why I came here. Focus. Tell him about your plan and say your goodbyes.

"I have a plan," I declare, blinking away any emotions you could see in my eyes, any pain. "I just wanted to let you know."

"Okay... what's the plan?"

I shake my head. "You won't be involved. None of you—"

"Stop right here," Brandon stands up, stepping towards me. "If you think I will let you do that, to do whatever it is you have in mind alone, then you must be really crazy."

I shrug, trying to act nonchalant, but my heart is racing. This wasn't supposed to happen. "Suit yourself. I thought I owed you that. Telling you what I plan to do before I leave."

"Do you hear yourself? Whatever your plan is, it's not happening. Don't get me wrong. You're smart, you're incredibly strong and brave, but you're stubborn as hell and it can lead to you doing something stupid."

"This is my fight," I snap, tightening my fists.

"This is our fight, Sophia. I've been played. They used me and it was a big mistake. I'll make them pay for what they did to me. To you." He takes another step towards me. "To us."

I flinch.

"Stop thinking you can deal with everything alone." He grabs my hand and places it over his heart. Thump thump. "I'm right here, sweetheart, and I chose to fight for us. For you, as long as I live on this goddamned earth. I chose to fight for what we once had. Because what we had isn't over. It hasn't even begun."

This isn't supposed to happen. I'm not supposed to feel anything, I'm not supposed to be touched by his words, I'm not supposed to step closer and kiss him, I'm not supposed to feel relief or happiness or desire or anything when his arms wrap around me and his mouth moves against mine.

And yet, I do.

Brandon broke down every wall I built over the years to protect myself from love, from happiness, from friendship, from sadness, from everything that could hurt me. From emotions.

We'll always be broken. We'll maybe always hurt each other. If one of us dies, it'll kill the other. He knows it. We both do. And yet I choose, for tonight, to try to forget that. I choose to believe that we can fix each other, fix the past, forget about the last four years when we both felt so empty. So numb.

I choose to believe his words.

Maybe tonight, destroying love is useless.

If I'm gonna do what I'm planning to do to find out the whole truth and to put an end to all of this, then I want to have a last good memory.

There will certainly be deaths. Maybe there'll be mine.

I know I'm still lying to Brandon and to myself by kissing him and thinking we both can do this. I don't care about anything right now, other than experimenting what I haven't felt for years. What I didn't want to feel for years.

Love.

My back is pressed on the bed within a few seconds, and Brandon's lips never leave mine.

"Jesus, Sophia," he growls, pulling away a second, biting my lower lip before pressing his mouth to mine again.

Oh, fuck.

"Brandon..."

"I've always been yours." His lips move to my neck, and I completely forget what I wanted to say. I don't want to talk anymore.

I just want to feel. Just tonight.

I want to remember how his hair feels like under my fingers, how his lips feel on my skin, and how his hands feel like, running down my hips and under my thighs.

For once, that's all I want.

*

GUESS WHO'S BACK WITH A NEW CHAPTER AFTER 1738272 YEARS? 🎉

Do you still remember me? YEAH ME NEITHER.

I'm so sorry for not updating, though. I haven't had the chance to write or to think about anything else other than college. I'm so tired, but I still decided to take time today to write a new chapter. ❤️

It was so damn hard to come back to this story after not writing for weeks, so I really hope you kind of liked this chapter even though it's meh. 🤷🏼‍♀️

BUT HOW ARE YOU?

Don't forget to VOTE and I'll give you a free cookie okay? thank you. ❤️⭐️

Until next chapter! :)

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