c h a p t er • 38

A/n: so, I just wanted to say that this book was really starting to sound like a book I read and I swear, I didn't realise it at first because that book isn't completed yet and had slow updates so I accidentally made it a little similar. I'm so sorry. I talked to the author about it and she thankfully wasn't really pissed off and I'm not sure if I should change the names to make it sound less similar. I'm sorry again. And from now on, Ava's name is back to Lili and is no longer Ava so there's no Ava in this story starting from this chapter since I'm too lazy to change it. Lolll. Hope you guys enjoy it!

Lili's POV

Wait, what?

"Isn't she...dead?" I ask slowly.

Maybe his mind is still messed up from the concussion.

He smiles.

Okay, his brain is definitely messed up.

"She visited me in my sleep." He says as if it was nothing.

"I think I'm confused." I say. Now, I feel like I'm the confused and messed up brain instead of him.

He chuckles and puts a strand of hair behind my ear as I look up at him.

"It sounds crazy but it felt so real. It was as if she was with me. She told me to take my chance with you and seek what I crave or something like that." He says and I nod slowly.

"What happened to her?" I blurt out. "I mean-you don't have to tell me. Forget I ever asked." I ramble, regretting my words.

Stupid girl. Why must I be such a dumbass?

"I told you she died before, right? She didn't just die, though. She was killed. Right in front of my eyes while I couldn't do anything but watch as the life was drained out of her." He sucks in a deep breath and exhale shakily.

I caressed his arm and rubbed it.

"It's okay. We'll talk about it next time." I say. "Let's sleep for now."

He purses his lips and nod.

I snuggle my head into his chest which vibrates meaning he was laughing.

"What would Kyle think of us?" I whisper.

His body tenses a little before he recovered.

"He knows...about my feelings for you." He says, playing with my hair.

"Oh." I say. "What was his reaction?"

"He was mad. He didn't want me to be alone with you anymore. He said I would only hurt you and he's not wrong." He sighs.

I bit the inside of my lip.

"Would you hurt me?" I ask.

"Not intentionally. But I can't promise you that you'll never get hurt if you're with me." He says.

"What if I get hurt?" I ask again.

"I chose you for a reason, Shortcake. You are strong. Very strong. I chose you because I knew from the moment I met you, you were equally as fucked up as I am. You were right for me but I tried to ignore it. I didn't want to hurt you, but I couldn't help it. You're perfectly imperfect and that's why I lo-want you." He says.

"You can't want me anymore." I say.

"Why-" I cut him off.

"You already have me." I say and kiss his chest because I'm too lazy to kiss him.

"Do you have me, too?" He asks, teasingly.

"Of course. Ever since I first kissed you." I blush.

He kisses my forehead again making me blush deeper.

Get your shit together woman.

"Will you be my girlfriend?" He whispers.

"You don't even have to ask." I say and hug him. "But, we shouldn't make it official yet. Not until we tell Kyle. That doesn't mean we can't do what couples do."

He hugs me back and rubs my back.

"Okay, Shortcake." He smiles.

He holds me in his arms as I hold him, keeping each other warm and away from the demons that disrupt our thoughts but I had one scary thought in particular.

What would happen if Kyle found out?

-•-

The next morning, I woke up with a knock on the door.

"Go away." I mumbled.

I felt movement next to me but I ignored it.

It was probably our dog, DJ.

"Shortcake." A voice whispered. "Wake up." A pair of arms shake my body.

"Let me sleep dumbass." I muttered.

I felt soft lips on my cheek and my eyes immediately opened.

"What the..." I trailed off, remembering last night.

"Yo, Ryder! You decent?" I heard Kyle's voice from the other side of the door and my eyes widened.

"No! Don't come in! I'm naked and uh...I slept with one of the nurses!" Ryder exclaimed which made me glare at him. He shrugs and shoos me out of bed.

"Damn, Ryder. Is she hot?" Kyle asks making me cringe.

"Yes, very hot." Ryder smirks and winks at me.

"Can I come in, now?" He asks.

"No!" Ryder and I said at the same time and our eyes widened as he clamps his hand over my mouth.

We panic and start arguing like with waving our hands around and whisper-yelling at each other.

"Um...that sounded like my sister. Is Lili in there?" Kyle sounded serious and angry this time.

"No, it's not." Ryder motions for me to get under the bed.

I look at him with a pleading look.

Not under the bed. Who knows how dusty it is under there?

But right now I didn't really have a choice.

I reluctantly got under the bed and stayed silent.

"I'm coming in." Kyle says and I hear the door being opened.

"The hell dude!" Ryder exclaimed.

"Oh, shit. Sorry. I thought you were with Lili." Kyle says sheepishly and walks out the door.

I sigh in relief and got up.

I chuckled when I saw him down to his boxers only with what was supposed to be Ryder's one night stand nurse.

"This is gonna be harder than I thought." Ryder sighs and runs a hand through his hair.

I smile and give him a peck on his lips.

"It's okay. We'll get through it." I encourage him and he smiles.

I noticed that he tends to smile more when he's with me.

"I don't think I'll ever get tired of seeing your smile." I admire and he chuckles.

"I smile only for you, Shortcake." He says but then I recall that extent where Ryder was laughing with, what's her name? Um, Jane? Bella? I don't remember but whatever.

"I doubt that. You also smile for that girl. The one you are bethrothed to." I mutter.

"She's just a childhood friend. Are you jealous?" He smirks, circling his arms around my waist and pulling me close as I put my arms around his neck.

I scoff.

"Jealous? Of course, I'm jealous. She was getting all cuddly with my Giraffe." I roll my eyes, annoyed even though I know I am being immature.

He laugh and caresses my face.

"I'd pick you over her, anytime." He winks and leans in to kiss me.

I kiss him back as we get lost in each other's touch and we both smile in our kiss.

I think I'm falling.

Falling deep.

-•-

A/n: Hey guysss remember when I said I will not be updating for like two three weeks? Yeah turns out I can't stop writing. Heheh. But I hope you guys liked it!