Chapter 63

Fifth day.

At the family breakfast table, Dalton carefully spoke while watching Valentine, who was barely managing to drink freshly squeezed grapefruit juice.

“I went to Charles House yesterday.”

Charles House was the gentlemen’s club Dalton belonged to. Named after Sir Charles Davidson, a member of the House of Commons and leading intellectual who graduated from Duford University, Dalton’s prestigious alma mater, it was a traditional club that had produced various young intellectuals and businessmen.

“It seems rumors have already spread quite a bit, as the club was all abuzz with the news.”

“What rumors?”

Dalton, still watching Valentine’s reaction, relayed the information to his older brother, the head of the family.

“That the Marquis of Valkyries sent a formal marriage proposal in the family’s name, and that he’s fallen hard for Valentine and is launching a gift offensive every day.”

Upon hearing this, all the family members sighed.

“If you’re going to refuse, it would be best to do it as quickly as possible. At this rate, rumors will spread not just in Elden, but throughout the empire, just as he intends.”

Valentine let out a groan of pain at Dalton’s concluding words.

“I’m sorry, Valentine.”

“No, Uncle. I know you told me because a quick decision is important. Thank you for letting me know.”

And so the fifth day passed with the family members wearing bitter smiles.

*

Sixth day.

There were days when the medicine worked well, and days when it didn’t.

Today was a day when the medicine was particularly ineffective.

Moreover, having heard that it was strong and not good for the body, he couldn’t use it excessively. On days like today when the effects of the small dose of medicine weren’t very noticeable, Valentine could only breathe painfully as he endured the morning sickness and lack of alpha pheromones.

Seeing Valentine throw up everything he ate, the Viscountess finally burst into tears. Even though she hadn’t shed a single tear during her own morning sickness, she finally broke down watching her son suffer from severe morning sickness.

Mason was called again amidst the Viscountess’s tearful outburst. He wiped the sweat from his forehead with a handkerchief and spoke with difficulty.

“It’s certainly an unusual case.”

“Right? I was fine without my husband when I was pregnant with Valentine.”

She continued to cry, wondering how her son could be so unlucky.

“That’s right. If all pregnant omegas sought alphas like this, trait-bearing humans would have gone extinct by now.”

Mason clicked his tongue as he removed the stethoscope from Valentine’s back, which was damp with cold sweat.

“Isn’t there any other medicine…?”

Valentine asked, his face buried in Reynard’s handkerchief, which had now lost all its pheromones. His voice was rough and weak, his throat raw from continuously vomiting not just food but yellow bile. The lack of alpha pheromones caused not only severe morning sickness but also lethargy, headaches, and even slight convulsions.

Mason shook his head. He said there were no other medicines, and even if there were, their safety was uncertain. He added a final solution:

“Meeting and staying with the alpha father of the baby as soon as possible would be…”

Hearing this, Valentine, lying weakly, shook his head. He couldn’t casually choose a marriage that was close to mortgaging his entire life because of this. And there was still one day left until the day he had promised to give an answer.

After Mason left, Valentine started retching again with convulsions. The Viscountess burst into tears again while patting her son’s back.

“Valentine, look at yourself. You really might die at this rate.”

Valentine’s condition was so serious that even someone who had initially said no one dies from morning sickness had completely changed their mind in just a few days. The sixth day passed in a blur with the sound of the Viscountess’s sobs and Valentine’s vomiting.

*

The long-awaited seventh day.

Valentine was lying askew on the couch by the window, eyes closed, lost in thought.

Reynard’s handkerchief covered Valentine’s vaguely open eyes above his lips. The alpha scent that Reynard had imbued for Valentine had already dissipated. Moreover, as the omega’s scent had become stronger from being held for days, it had been relegated to merely providing mental comfort. It had now become an ordinary handkerchief.

Over the past week, Valentine had been pondering repeatedly while suffering from various external pressures and physical pain. Having thought enough, it was now time to analyze step by step and make a decision.

As he always did when organizing his thoughts, Valentine lay still and sorted through his mind.

Through the blurred vision covered by the handkerchief, he asked himself a clear question.

‘Do I love this person?’

No, I’m not sure.

The answer came quickly. Although he liked him and didn’t mind spending time together, he didn’t know enough about him to harbor such a tremendous emotion as love. The time spent together was short, and they didn’t know each other’s acquaintances, among other things – everything was lacking.

His pheromones were satisfying and his heart tickled when he smiled, but that was all. For him, this feeling was far from enough to be called love.

A sigh from Valentine’s mouth made the handkerchief on his face flutter lightly.

Valentine moved on to the second question he asked himself.

‘Then, does this person love me?’

I don’t know that either.

Although he had briefly included the word love in his last letter, he had never said it directly. And even if he had verbally expressed love, Valentine would have scoffed. It was for the same reason he wasn’t sure about his own feelings. His sentiment was, ‘How much more do you know about me to talk about love?’

It was separate from his pheromones always speaking of affection. Isn’t expressing liking different from love? He was also confused about how to measure and judge another person’s degree of affection. Even more so if it was affection between an alpha and omega. Just because one likes the pheromones doesn’t mean it’s love.

However, it was true that he felt possessive of Valentine and treated him kindly. Though forceful and compulsory, there was a high possibility it could develop into love.

‘Then, can our relationship change to and continue as love in the future?’

Unlike the previous two questions, he was positive about this aspect.

Valentine nodded unconsciously. And he began to contemplate whether the two of them could truly love each other in the future.

Although overly hopeful, it wasn’t an unbelievable story. Valentine felt he would quickly fall in love if Reynard continued to cherish him as he did now. Barring any special circumstances, there was a possibility.

Moreover, Reynard didn’t seem like someone who would be unfaithful to his spouse. If they were to marry, he would probably become a faithful alpha spouse as his family had always been. Especially with His Majesty the Emperor as such a tremendous witness between them. He wouldn’t be able to act like the shameless figures in social circles who secretly cheat on their spouses.

Well then, thoughts about the two people’s emotions and marriage were finished.@@novelbin@@

What remained last was his own mindset.

‘Will I be satisfied with this marriage and be able to live my future life happily?’

In fact, Valentine was very skeptical about this part. It was also the reason he had been worrying for days. Of course he would be, since his greatest life goal of living freely was about to crumble completely.

He would have to shoulder the enormous weight of being the Grand Duke’s consort, and further, the Grand Duchess. Wearing the heavy clothes of status that felt like being confined every day, would I truly be able to live happily?

Valentine was least confident about this part.

‘What if I cry longing for freedom every day?’

He removed the handkerchief from his face and abruptly sat up from his reclining position.

Reynard, who was part of the military, a group more rigid than any other organization. To dream of a wanderer-like life with such an incredible husband… Clearly, no one would understand.

“Being a Grand Duchess would probably restrict my movements even more…”

A sigh and a soliloquy flowed out. A person of that status probably wouldn’t be free to travel either. It seemed that even minor actions abroad could cause national issues.

“…This part really has no answer…”

Valentine shook his head and put aside this train of thought without finishing it. No matter how much he thought about it now, it didn’t seem like a proper conclusion would come. No, no matter how much he thought about it, life as a high-ranking nobleman in a set mold didn’t seem satisfying.

‘Let’s just put this aside for now and think about something else first.’

The most important thought. The person who held the biggest weight in this marriage.

It was the child currently in his belly.

“Are you there…?”

Valentine rubbed his still flat stomach and spoke to the baby inside for the first time. Although he felt sick every day and his body was constantly struggling, he didn’t resent the child.

What sin could a child who has already been conceived have?

If there was any sin, it would be with himself and Reynard, who didn’t expect a child to be conceived and shared their bodies without any precautions, just caught up in the mood. The child was a victim and sacrifice of that recklessness.

If only they had used proper contraception… No, if they hadn’t shared their bodies so unprepared in the first place, such an unexpected victim wouldn’t have been created… Thinking this, Valentine felt like he might burst into tears.

“I’m sorry…”

It was a poor child, neither intended nor expected. Although the pregnancy was overwhelming and he was trembling with fear that his life might change completely, he absolutely couldn’t blame the child. Rather, he was afraid the child might resent him later when it was born.

“I’m really sorry I couldn’t welcome you with a more proper environment and prepared mind…”

He gently rubbed his slim belly, speaking to the child who probably didn’t even have ears yet.

Chirp chirp chirp.

A few sparrows flew to the window. They seemed to have discovered the handful of grain Valentine had sprinkled on the windowsill for a change of mood. As he was sitting on the couch right below the window, he could see the birds up close. Somehow, the three sparrows busily pecking at the grain and grooming each other’s feathers began to look like a family.

‘A family…’