Chapter 29

I settled in my seat, doing everything I could to hold myself together. Just a couple of hours and I could lose it in a hotel room in Rome as I worked out the flights back to Australia.

I pressed send to the messages to Ma, Gi and, in the end, Landon as well. I tried not to be nasty in the message to him and just wished him luck in the future with his whores… yep couldn’t help it!

I ignored all the calls from Ma, Gi, Landon, Tom, Leo and everyone else and turned my phone off. Just a couple of hours of holding it together! I can’t wait to see my parents! Yes, that will be amazing! And the rest of my family… and my friends!

Actually, I really couldn’t wait. It had been too long. Way too long, even though I need them for emotional support right now, it was also because I had never been away from them for this long. I always tried to go back to the farm once a month. It was good for my stress levels and I am sure for my mum’s as well…. Probably my dad’s more-so, since it would shut mum up for a bit as she got to nag me in person for whatever she could.

Yes, Australia is my home. I can’t wait to be “home amongst the gum trees”. I almost made myself laugh with that one.

My head was back resting on the headrest, my eyes were closed as I thought of all the things I wanted to do back home when suddenly someone grabbed my hand. I wasn’t concentrating on my surroundings, so I got a fright as I tried to yank it back and opened my eyes to those beautiful eyes that I love…d used to love. Couldn’t love anymore!

Landon was on the floor kneeling in front of me holding my hand like it was his life line.

“NO!” was all I could get out as I continued to try and pull my hand away.

“It was Aunt Maria’s lipstick. She and the old women’s club were with Ma yesterday. I would never! Please get off the plane so we can talk.”

Really? Did I overreact? But he has been so distant! I searched his eyes looking for any bit of deceit as my heart skipped a beat.

Could he be telling the truth? Or is he a good liar? Is he losing the game? If I leave, he loses someone he thought he had control over… Of course, ANY of them would back up his story. He could tell me Aunt Maria was an alien and they would all agree to keep me here.

I closed my eyes. I couldn’t look into their depths any more, get lost in them “NO!” I whisper yelled as I exhaled.

“I was there. We have footage. Ma is getting it and will send it to my phone. Kate, he’s telling the truth.” I didn’t realise Tom was here as well.

“Please! I will do f*****g anything!” Landon kissed my hands.

“I don’t be…”

“You do! You belong with me! You belong here, with me!”

A phone rang and I heard Tom’s voice. I still didn’t open my eyes though. I couldn’t.

“Amore, please look here.”

I finally opened my eyes to a phone right in front of my face. It was a video chat showing someone, probably Ma, holding the phone’s camera close to a monitor that was playing the footage of Aunt Maria tripping on something and Landon catching her before she gave Landon a k**s and patted him on the cheek.

The footage isn’t the best but you can clearly see the white shirt and then Maria wipes it after her stumble. You can sort of see red, but maybe that is just what my eyes want to see.

Landon’s large hand with all his bruised, scabbed-up knuckles tentatively cups my face. “Let me explain, please Amore! Please, Kate!” It has been a while since he has actually used my real name and not a pet name.

An explanation… I have been asking for an explanation of what was wrong for the last f*****g week! He picks now to want to finally talk!

But I will always wonder… My brain will not stop until I know why he was acting the way he was and until I see the footage properly… but then would I be stuck here. He would never let me go, but I have to know….

“Fine!” I growled.

I tried to ignore all the stares from everyone around us as I grabbed my handbag and bag from the overhead, not letting Landon touch it.

I walked out with my head down, Tom in front and Landon behind touching my back as I walked.

I was glad the whole family wasn’t there when we got into the terminal. I had a feeling they would be. Actually, no not a feeling. I know what Ma is like, so I was expecting the whole family, including cousins and elders actually.

I sat down on one of the lounges and crossed my arms, refusing to look into his eyes “Explain.”

“Not here.”

“Then I am getting back on that flight”. I went to get up.

“No. Not here. Please Amore!” His voice was soft and pleading. I bet only a hand full of people have only ever heard Landon like this.

It made me want to say yes and believe him and have him hold me and… NO! But I need answers.

“What so you can then take me back and then ignore me again? Stop me from leaving just so you still have control even though you don’t actually want me?”

“I f****d up! Yes I f****d up! There is more going on that you need to know about but we can’t talk here.” He brushed his knuckles down my cheek softly “I don’t want to lose you. I can’t lose you and I promise I will tell you everything. We will tell you everything but you have to come back with me. Please Amore.”

I wanted to scream no, f**k off, you should have spoken to me a week or more ago, but instead I got up and started walking to the front of the airport. My heart was aching and I needed answers. I now knew it was Maria’s lipstick but I also needed to know why he had been so distant.

We walked out to one of their normal motor cascade of Black SUV’s with a lot of men around them in the drop off zone. I felt a little bad for them taking up so much space.

One of the men quickly opened the door for me. I reminded myself I needed answers as I got in the car with Landon straight after me. I was surprised when Tom got in the driver’s seat and no one else got in the car.

We settled in the car with me on one side of the back seat and Landon on the other. I didn’t try and sit in the middle and he didn’t make me.

“It is your choice. It will always be your choice, remember that!” Landon said while looking me straight in the eyes, his body stiff facing me.

OK, now I am confused… is it my choice because he has f****d up some other way and so it is my choice to stay or not. He said he hadn’t cheated. What could it be? Something from his past? Could he have just found he had a child with an ex or one night stand?

Of f**k, what about if that is it! I have to deal with another woman’s child. What about if she has used the child to lure him back?

“I should have told you from the start. This is your choice, not mine!”

“Just spit it out!” My head hurts enough trying to come up with what it could be!

“Leo is also in love with you. You are mine and will always be mine. But the choice is yours if you want to accept him as well.”

I looked at him in shock. Mind blown!

What!

I tried to read his face, every inch of it, then looked at Tom who was watching me in the rear-view mirror. He was telling the truth.

The way his hands were almost twitching while clenched into fists on his lap, every muscle tense, the determination in his eyes…

“What?”

“Would being with me and Leo make you happy?” he watched me carefully, not breaking eye contact and I am not sure if he was even blinking.

“Wait, hold up! You have hardly looked at me, been home or spoken to me since the breach and since I told you that I love you and now you want to know if I want a threesome? What the f**k! We haven’t even had s*x since then!”

He let out another deep sigh as his brows furrowed. His closest hand reached out and grabbed mine. “I… didn’t handle the situation.”

“Situation!” I stared at him. He can’t be f*****g serious right now! I tried to retract my hand. “Tom turn the car arou…”

“No! Ma told me the day after about Leo’s feelings and I needed to think it over.” His thumb stroking the back of my hand as he held it firm.

“What the f**k about me? Do you know how f*****g rejected I have felt and then the lipstick!”

He winced, the great mafia boss winced. “I should have spoken to you.”

“Yes you f*****g should have! Right now, no one is getting any, let alone a threesome. What was it you said? Of yeah I don’t share. And isn’t this once again against your religion?”

“It is not a threesome exactly, it would be a polyamorous relationship, not just a one-night stand.”

“Have you ever done that before?”

“Leo and I have shared women but not in a relationship.”

“So you go from not wanting me to wanting to share me.”

“I have always wanted you and always will want you. Never ever think I wont!” he almost gritted out. “I had to think about if I could let Leo touch the most precious gift god has given me.”

“Well, if it meant losing you, then no f*****g way. You f*****g broke my heart these past 2 weeks. Shattered it. I f*****g lost you anyway, so what’s the point?”

In one swift move he slid across the seat and held me tight. Being Australian, I still put my seatbelt on as soon as I get in a car. He doesn’t, so he had to come to me or quickly undo my seatbelt.

“Didn’t you hear me? You are my world, the most precious gift that I will never let go of. You have not and WILL not lose me. I f*****g love you with everything I am! I f****d up!” He gritted that last part through his teeth. “I f****d up and I will be making sure you feel treasured the way you deserve for the rest of your life. I will fix this, let me fix this.” He k****s my forehead and caresses my cheek.

He gives me another squeeze then looks into my eyes “What can I do to prove it? Do you want to elope? Just the 2 of us first, then think about everything later?”

Sighing “No! You’re normally a smart man, even you should see how dumb that would be!”

His lips tilted up, showing a slight smirk before he became serious again. “I will do everything I can to prove it. I WILL marry you one day, when and how is up to you. I would prefer it within the next year though”, then winked at me.

Not ready for the winks and flirting yet buddy! But still, all my anger and fear and every other emotion under the sun that I have had for the last few hours started to melt away with only confusion remaining. What the hell do I do about Leo?

Do I have feelings for him? I have never thought about it. Sure, I like him as a person, he is f*****g hot like Landon, but could I be in a relationship with him as well?

“Calm down on the proposal with only one issue at a time please. I honestly haven’t looked or thought about another man since I have been with you, so I don’t know what to say about Leo. What did Leo say?”

Landon smiled at my first statement, then frowned a little. “I haven’t spoken to him.”

“Wait a minute! How do you know Ma didn’t just misinterpret everything then if you haven’t spoken to him? What about if he didn’t want a poly relationship in the first place?”

Tom gave a little cough from the front as he tried to hide a small laugh.

“Spill it Tom!” he was not getting away with that since he had been listening the whole time.

Tom shakes his head and tries to concentrate on the road instead.

“Tom, seriously come on! What was the laugh about? Landon not speaking to Leo or Ma getting something wrong?”

“Ma’s never wrong! For someone as clever as you, it’s amazing you missed Leo’s affections.”

“Sorry I can’t see it! He was just being a great friend and still screwing everything that looked at him sideways.”

“No he hasn’t, but that is for him to tell you”. Tom shakes his head again and goes back to pretending to just concentrate on the road. I swear I can see his ears twitching as he strains to make sure he catches every word.

“Do you want to speak to Leo?” Landon interjects.

“I don’t know. My mind is everywhere at the moment.”

He nods and k****s my hand again.

“Would you seriously be OK with a poly relationship? You Mr Possessive?”

Landon chuckles. “I wasn’t sure either until I thought I lost you and realised I trust him and you and it isn’t really my choice.”

“It is though. We all have a choice.”

“If Leo doesn’t move to New York,” Tom interjects.

I looked back at Landon with wide eyes. He just nods.

“Why would he move to New York?”

Landon raises an eyebrow at me as if to say think about it.

Would he do that to get away from me? Get away from the feelings he never thought would be reciprocated… well I know I would!

CRAP!

But could I have feelings for him other than the friendship we have formed?

“Call him and see if he will meet us at our house.” I let out a sigh and looked out the window.

I can’t look at Landon as my brain starts whirling in circles. I have never even had a threesome! I know it would be more than a threesome but… me with 2 men? Brothers. Full Brothers! Hot amazing brothers!

I will admit in those romance novels it’s kind of hot 2 men and 1 woman. Although the woman is normally more than happy to have anal s*x and is good at blow jobs.

Me, well, I am a prude and the worst at head. I have tried to give Landon head a couple of times, but after a short time, he quickly replaces my mouth with my p***y.

He hasn’t complained and I have asked him to tell me what to do to make it better, but I am just crap at it. Oh and it doesn’t help that some people can gage and get over it and I gage and then throw up, so no deep throating from me.

I haven’t thrown up on him but I have embarrassed myself by coming close once. Luckily, I made it to the bathroom before I threw up in the sink. I was horrified, whereas Landon just laughed and thought it was hilarious! Yep, I am every man’s dream partner.

Then there is the anal. Another time I had Landon in fits of laughter. I explained to him there is an “iny hole” and an “outy hole” and never the 2 should be mixed up.

I have never really been comfortable with a large c**k being shoved up there. Of course, I may change my mind one day and want to try it. You never know the future… as right now is proving!

Although s*x, s*x is amazing with Landon, but I do worry that one day it won’t be enough for him. So how am I supposed to keep 2 men satisfied?

I am a plain simple woman, not a s*x goddess and not some over the top adventurous siren. Sure, I love some of the play we do or the chase I give him sometimes, but that is just fun and any normal woman does that too with the other stuff I am either uncomfortable with or can’t do well.

I seriously don’t think I can keep 2 men happy!

And wait, wait a minute, you hussy. There has to be a relationship first. Could I have feelings for Leo?

Could I be in a relationship with Leo and Landon?