Chapter 84

Chapter 84

EMMA

“There he is. Finally, you get to speak to him. I’m so happy. So why don’t you go and find him and speak to him,” 1.ola cheered me up.

“Alright. How do I look? I don’t want to look nervous when I approach him,” I told Lola.

“Don’t worry. Just act natural. It’s going to be alright. You should start getting your nerves calm because you’d be speaking to him now and then,” she reminded me.

I took in a deep breath and exhaled deeply before going to look for him. I first went to the class I saw him the other day where we had fun but he wasn’t there.

I was disappointed because I wanted to see him there as it would be easy for me to converse with him and have a good time.

I then went to the other spot I usually see him stay alone but he wasn’t there. I immediately knew that he was hanging out with Ethan. That ruined my mood because it would feel weird if went over and told him that I wanted to speak to him.

Ethan would want to know what it was and even if he didn’t say anything at first, he would want to know later on and I wasn’t ready for that.

“What’s wrong? Have you spoken to him already?” Lola asked as we came across each other again.

sighed deeply. “I.. I don’t know. We haven’t seen it’s just… it’s

“What is it!” Lola asked, a hint of concern laced in her tone.

“The thing is, I was expecting him to be in the spots I usually find him without anyone but sadly he’s not there,” I explained.

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“But he’s in school. Have you checked everywhere?” She asked.

“I haven’t. I already know where he’d be but I don’t think I want to go there,” I replied.

“Why?” She asked hints of curiously laced in her tone.

“It is because of my brother and the people that will be there. It’s going to be weird you know,” I sighed.

“Weird as how? Why don’t you text him and then ask him to meet in if you know you are too nervous to go to him?” She suggested.

Although her idea made sense, I would have done that if I wanted to because I thought about that too but I couldn’t.

Why? Because he might not read the message and he might not see it. Knowing him, he barely uses his phone and I wouldn’t want to be waiting for long-

Also, I only have some minutes to catch up with him before the break is over and I’m hungry too. It’s just crazy how everything today isn’t going well although I was super excited about him and expected it to be a great day.

“What are you going to do now? It seems you have to speak to him today but if it doesn’t have to be rushed then you’d have to wait. I mean if he wanted to have that conversation with you then he’d have looked for a means but it seems you are the one doing it all yourself which is stressful for you, don’t you think?” Lola remarked.

She was right but her words hurt me. I was the one who wanted to speak to him. If he wanted to speak to me then he’d have texted me but he didn’t do any of that and today, he’s not making any effort to see me because why did he have to hang out with Ethan and his other friend today?

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Chapter 84

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“I didn’t mean to hurt your-feelings, I was just thinking out loud Lola quickly added and I’m guessing she did that because she noticed my facial expression.

I smiled at her. “It’s all fine. Maybe I should give it up. Maybe I should just act like none of this ever happened just like he’s doing. I feel that would make it better, don’t you think?”

“Are you sure? I was just thinking out loud but if you want to speak to him then don’t let any word I said stop you because you will keep beating yourself up if you don’t do as you want so kindly ignore my words,” she replied.

“You don’t have to feel bad Lola. It’s fine. I will just forget about. I think it’s for the best and besides this is nature’s way of telling me that it’s best I let things go.” I explained.

“Regardless, still try and speak to him. At least you’d have your heart feeling free if you spoke to him but wanted to him because I said that if he wanted to then he would,” she said, urging me but I already made up my mind.

ignore

I feel if I decided to still speak to him before the end of today then I’d get my heart broken and I don’t think that I want to do that so it would be best I act like none of this happens for my own sake.

At least I got my first kiss on my seventeenth birthday.

“It’s alright Lola. I think it’s best that I let it go, don’t you think?” smiled at her.

“Are you sure?” She asked and I nodded my head.

“I’m sure so you don’t have to worry about me. It’s fine,” I smiled at her assuringly again.

Alright then.” She said.

The day went by and another came. Every day I wished for Sean to walk up to me and for us to talk about the kiss but it was as if he was deliberately avoiding me because Lknew he was in school but I never saw him and as much as I wanted to go and find him, to secretly see him, I couldn’t at the same time.

It hurts that I was so much invested and he isn’t as bothered as I was and worse it hurts that I’ve been thinking and dreaming about the kiss, wanting a repeat of it

It drives me insane each time I thought about the possibility that he might not care as I did and I was only fooling my

I’ve tried for days not to cry. I refused to cry. I just wanted to be in my own space but it was hard for me.

Why did he kiss me? I asked myself. Why did he kiss me if he knew he didn’t want me? Does he derive joy from hurting n feelings? It hurts so much.

Every day I would go through our chats to see how we conversed but it hurts.

“Hey,” Lola said to me.

“Hi,” I replied.

“Are you alright?” She asked and I nodded my head. For days I’ve been telling her that it’s fine because I didn’t want her to know how hurt I was.

“Are you sure?” She doesn’t seem convinced by my line so I smiled to prove her right.

“Do you realize you are making me feel somehow each time I tell you I’

I’m fine and then you ask again if I’m sure?” I told her.

“I’m sorry. I never intended to make you feel that way,” she said.

“It’s fine,” I replied.

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Chapter 84

“So have you heard?” She said.

“Heard what?” I asked.

“There’s a pool party later this weekend which is tomorrow and the whole school is invited?” She informed me.

I furrowed my brows in confusion. “Pool party? What are you talking about?”

“Whose pool party?” I asked.

“How do you not know about the pool party when it will be at your own house,” she added..

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“My own house? Who is throwing a pool party because I don’t recall saying any of that and Ethan isn’t either,” I remarked.

“It’s at your house and it’s Ethan. Everyone is invited. Your parents aren’t in town so he decided to have a pool party at your house, she answered.

1 clenched my fist. How dare he decide to throw a pool party and I wasn’t aware? How dare he do that when our parents aren’t around and who permitted him to? I will make sure he regrets it.

1 stormed out to go find Ethan because I needed answers. How could he have pool parties and I wasn’t aware and someone else had to tell me?

I found Ethan among his friends and I walked toward him.

“Ethan!” I called out and it was then that I saw Sean. My heart sk ipped and I froze on the spot.

I hadn’t seen him all week and seeing him now and here I expected made me freeze.

I immediately snapped out of it when it called the purpose of my trip here.

“What is it, Emma?” She asked.

“We 1 pointed at him and then at me. “Need to talk.”

“We? What for?” He asked making me pis sed.

1

I scoffed. “Are you seriously asking me that? I’d advise that you leave and for us to talk or if he forced to speak here,” I

warned.

Ethan looked back at his friends and then told them that he’d be back

“What is it, Emma? Why did you have to do that?” He whispered and I glared at him.

“How dare you!”

“How dare me? What do you mean?” He sounded frantic and I scoffed in disbelief.

“Are you seriously doing this? You don’t have to act confused because I’m the one feeling st upid! How could you throw a house party without informing me? That’s not even the problem, the whole school knows except me. How is that possible!” I chided.

I face-palmed myself. “Are you kidding me? Was that why you called for me? Seriously Emma?“

“Are you also kidding me?” I was beyond surprised by his words.

“You are the one that did something that you shouldn’t do and instead of you to apologize or make me understand, you are busy asking me questions? Are you for real now?”

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“What are you even talking about and what’s with all this fuse? Yes I’m throwing a house party this weekend and you didn’t know because I didn’t tell you and that was because there was no need,” he replied and I scoffed in disbelief.

Was this the same person apologized to me for being jerk! I just couldn’t believe it.

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