Chapter 214
Accidental Surrogate for Alpha
Chapter 214 â What Youâve Done To Me
Ella
We donât spend very long in the bath.
As soon as Iâm fed and clean, Sinclair takes me to my nest and lays me out like his own personal feast,
and he wastes no time in ravishing me.
Iâve never been frightened of Sinclair. Not at his wildest or grouchiest, not even when heâs on the
warpath against others, or assailing me with the full force of his magic. If anything, itâs been an
incredible turn on to know that I can call such a powerful man my own, that Iâm the sole soft spot in his
impenetrable armor.
But when he makes love to me now, I feel afraid. Not for myself â never that â but for the feral energy I
can sense swirling through his body. His wolf is in full control and heâs near rabid with desire â ruthless
in his affection. He isnât gentle, nor would I ask him to be. I love his rough passion and savage intensity:
the way he makes me feel as if Iâm the only woman in the world and heâll die if he doesnât have me this
instant; the way he drives into me with reckless abandon and earth-shattering skill, drawing sounds I
didnât even know I was capable of making from my mouth before he greedily swallows them with his
tongue.
Still, thereâs a dark edge to his carnal hunger, as if itâs not just sensual release he seeks, but
absolution. The dominance he exerted earlier is nothing compared to the chaotic power fueling him
now, and while I might not understand everything behind his actions, I realize that as much as he wants
me, heâs also hurting. Iâm seeing the results of everything heâs pent up over the last few days, and my
wolf is only too eager to submit, to give him whatever solace we can, for however long he needs it.
So I give myself to him completely, letting him claim me over and over again, and trying to survive the
endless onslaught of pleasure he delivers. At some point it becomes too much, and my vision blacks
out as I crest the peak of yet another orgasm. I donât fight the darkness, because I know Iâm safe in my
mateâs arms at long last.
Iâm alone when I wake, and instantly I fear Sinclairâs return was all a dream.
I jerk up in my nest, my wolf whimpering as I scan the room. However, almost as soon as the sound
leaves my lips, a soft purr rises to meet it, and I shift my worried gaze to follow the comforting rumble.
Sinclair stands on the terrace looking out on the sleeping city, but now he turns and strides back to the
bed, âItâs okay, Ella. Iâm here.â He assures me, wrapping me up in his strong arms.
I cling to him with all my strength, unable to form words just yet. My heart feels as though it just took a
plunge off a high dive, without knowing if there was any water waiting to break my fall. Luckily there
was, but my pulse is still racing with the fright. Sinclair strokes my spine and kisses my hair, murmuring
sweet nothings in my ear. It takes me longer than it should to calm down, but my wolf is seriously on
edge after this last week.
âWhat were you doing?â I finally ask, unable to keep a petulant note from my voice, my inner animal
thoroughly affronted that he scared me this way.
âI was just thinking.â Sinclair answers, his warm breath fluttering over my ear. âI havenât had a moment
to stop since the explosion â Iâve been so focused on getting home. But now Iâm here, everything is
hitting me at once.â As soon as he says it, he opens the gates and lets the emotion pour through our
bond. Iâm thankful that he doesnât try to hide his pain from me, but the force of it is staggering. Not only
grief for Hugo and his men, but confusion and guilt over how he survived when they did not. More than
anything else, I sense a deep well of helplessness, brought on by his inability to protect the people he
loves in all this chaos.
I hold him tighter, âThey were good men.â I tell him softly. âThey loved you, they would have been happy
you survived even if they didnât.â
âBut they shouldnât have had to die.â Sinclair replies thickly, burying his head in my neck and breathing
in my scent. âWe didnât even see the attack coming. We donât know how Damon managed it, or where
the bomber is now.â He doesnât say it, but I can sense how badly this grates on his nerves. One more
thing he canât control, one more tragedy piling onto his conscience. âIâm so sick of this war, and itâs
hardly even begun.â
âI know.â I say honestly. âAnd I know how badly you want to fix all this, how agonizing itâs been for you
to see your people suffering. Please just remember that youâre not in this alone, Dominic. You donât
have to have all the answers. Your family, your pack â we all love you and weâre in this together.â I
remind him, hoping the words donât sound hollow to a man who has the weight of the whole world on
his shoulders. âWeâre all mourning for Hugo, for every wolf in those cars. Donât let our relief that youâre
okay make it seem otherwise, because we all lost a great deal in that accident. Weâll make sure they
didnât die in vain. Weâre going to get through this.â
âThank you, baby.â Sinclair sighs, his salty tears feeling hot on my skin.âI really needed to hearthat.â
I nod, still a bit afraid to trust that heâs truly here, while also hating that his homecoming carries such
heartache. âI would have told you sooner if those bullies had let me come after you.â I quip, only half
joking.
âMmm,â Sinclair rumbles appreciatively. âAnd I suppose thatâs the only reason you were so determined
to come after me? Because you knew I needed comfort?â
Iâm suddenly very glad he canât see my face. âNot entirely.â
âWhat else?â Sinclair asks, pulling back to look down at me and, as usual, filling me with the sensation
that he can see straight through me.
I shrug and lean my cheek against his shoulder, wishing we didnât have to have this conversation, but
knowing he wonât rest until we do.
âCome on trouble, talk to me.â Sinclair encourages. âYou kept saying you knew I was okay after the
attack, but thatâs not the way it sounds.â He sighs, petting my sides. âYou collapsed. Youâve been
neglecting your health, and cutting yourself off from the baby? None of that seems hopeful.â
âI said I knew you were alive. But I didnât know you were okayâ¦â I correct him, staring at my lap. âAnd
everyone was telling me I was just in denial. I was afraid to sleep because it might prove them right if
you didnât turn up⦠and I think I was so desperate to come after you because I needed to prove them
wrong. I needed to know I wasnât just blindly hoping. The truth is that I was terrified.â I confess shakily.
âYou donât realize what youâve done to me, Dominic.â
Sinclair takes my face in his hands, his thumbs brushing away rogue tears as they slip down my
cheeks. âWhat have I done, baby?â 1
The concern on his face nearly topples me over, but I manage to stay upright â if only because I need
to reassure him. âBefore I met you, all I ever wanted was a baby. Thatâs it.â I explain, still amazed by
how quickly everything has changed. âI would have loved a partner, but you saw what I was willing to
settle for with Mike.â My mate growls at the sound of the humanâs name, and as much as I want to
smile, I canât. The confession Iâm about to make is too grave, too terrifying when our lives are so
precarious.
âBut you ruined all that.. you made my old dreams not enough anymore.â I share, searching his
emerald gaze for understanding. âYou opened my eyes to worlds I didnât know existed, a kind of love I
never dreamed I might have. You spoiled me⦠spoiled me for anyone else, nothing but you will ever
be enough for me now.â The worry dissipates from Sinclairâs gaze, and he watches me with such
tenderness that my wolf melts into a puddle. âI canât lose you, Dominic. I love this baby with every fiber
of my being, but I need you too. I donât want to go back to the way things were â living a half life and
convincing myself it was enough because I didnât know any better.â
âYouâre not going to lose me, sweetheart.â Sinclair promises, and I can tell he believes it, even though
this isnât something in our power.
âYou donât know that.â I reply, thinking of Isabel, or Henry and all the people who have lost mates. âLook
at what has already happened.â
âExactly.â Sinclair purrs. âLook at what weâve already survived, look at the forces that have tried to keep
us apart and failed. What canât we do?â
I furrow my brow. âBut-â I want to say that this is all still beginning, we still have the summit ahead of us,
and who knows what other challenges. But I donât get the chance.
Sinclairâs finger comes over my lips, âno buts, no what ifs. Youâre my destiny, Ella. Iâm not going to let
anything come between us.