Chapter 254

#Chapter 254 – Big Decisions “Evelyn,” Victor says seriously, “I want you to have a say in what happens to them if you want a say in what happens to them. This pack belongs to both of us now, and it’s a big decision. But I’ll defer to you.

If you tell me that you want nothing to do with it, then I’ll take whatever action I think is best.”

I nod, considering it, grateful in my heart that he’s offering me the choice. It’s certainly nothing my father never offered my mother – indeed, never anything I’ve heard an Alpha ever offer a Luna. But how many of these chats happened in the dark of night, in bed, with an Alpha seeking his mate’s advice?

There was so much I didn’t know about how all of this was done.

But still, I’m eager to take up the task.

“And what if I say I wanted them released, hypothetically,” I ponder quietly aloud. “What would that even look like?”

“Well,” Victor says, considering it. “It wouldn’t be complete freedom. They’re still men who betrayed me, and – as Alphas – would likely seek revenge. So there would be stipulations on their freedom, and they would always – always have guards on them. They’d never really be free.”

“That makes sense,” I murmur, though my mind is elsewhere, on a much darker question.

Victor sits quietly, waiting. I can tell that he knows I’m not finished, and he’s not letting himself drift off to sleep, as he probably wants to.

“Victor,” I say, hesitating and glancing up at him. “What if I said that…I wanted them…”

I bite my lip, hardly able to voice it.

“Go on, Evelyn,” he whispers to me, understanding. “It’s all right.”

“Well,” I continue. “What if I said I wanted them dead?”

Victor is quiet for a moment, studying me. Then he continues, his voice serious and fierce and steady.

“If you want them dead, Evelyn, then that’s what they’ll be.”

My eyes widen a little as I realize the power that he’s given me. The power not only over someone’s freedom, but their life. I had always known, somewhere in the back of my mind, that Alphas weighed these kinds of decisions as part of their roles at the head of their pack. But never, ever had I considered that it would be something I would have on my own plate, even when I accepted Victor’s offer to share the pack power with me.

“Is that…legal?” I ask quietly, blushing a little. “Sorry, I don’t even know if that’s the right term – I mean, would other packs reject that decision? How would that play out in politics?”

“It is within my right,” Victor says evenly. “If it hadn’t been an act of war, things would be different. But they declared war on me – they knew what they were risking.”

I breathe out a big breath and roll onto my back, staring at the ceiling. Victor lets me, his fingers resting gently on the skin of my arm to let me know that he’s here as I think it over.

I’ve always been someone who leans towards life and light, I think to myself as I stare into the darkness. Never, ever had I wished death on anyone – not really. Not even Joyce, after everything that he did to me. Not even Amelia, after she’d had my children kidnapped, and after she put us all at risk after burning the house down.

But now, considering it…

Considering the absolute plagues upon the earth that my father and Joyce are, that they’ve never brought anything but sorrow to anyone in the pursuit of their own entitled desires… I grit my teeth, thinking about them, these horrible toxic people who have done so much harm in the world.

Men, indeed, who would continue to do harm if we allow them to persist on this earth. Who would actively come after me, and my children, and Victor, and our future children if – well. That’s a line of thinking for another time, I consider, though a hand drifts low on my stomach.

Was it worth my pity, my empathy, my desire to not be a killer, to let them live? Who, really, would pay the price for that empathy – my children?

Would the better choice – the true gift to the world, and to my children – be to wipe them from it?

I groan a little, sick at the thought, sick at this line of thinking. I’ve never really shied away from hard questions – not really – but these ones are taking me down a dark path I’m not sure I ever wanted to be on.

“I’m sorry, Evelyn,” Victor says, taking my hand and giving it a little squeeze. There’s real regret in his voice as he continues. “I shouldn’t have put this on your shoulders – I should have decided myself, and spared you this –“

“No,” I say, turning my head sharply to him. “No, Victor. You shouldn’t have to carry this by yourself.”

I mean it, too. Every word of it. He’s so strong, but to expect one person to carry this just to spare me from it means I’m making him walk down the path alone.

“We’ll decide this together,” I say firmly, and I see a little proud smile form on his lips. I hesitate for a second, though, thinking it through. “Do you mind?” I ask. “If I have a little more time? It’s…a lot to think about.”

“Of course, Evie,” he murmurs, wrapping his arm around me again and pulling me close against his chest. He presses a kiss to my hair as I tuck my head beneath his chin, taking in a long breath through my nose and letting myself be comforted by his rich warm scent. “They’re safe, and contained. We can take as long as we need on this decision.”

“Actually,” I continue, my eyes still closed, my words muffled a little against his chest. “I’m not sure we can make this decision alone.”

“Hmm?” he hums curiously, pulling back a little to look at me.

“I think that I can’t decide,” I say slowly, “without asking my mom and my sister what they think. I can’t…I can’t decide the fates of their husbands without knowing what they want.”

Victor stays still, steady, sensing that I’m not finished.

“It doesn’t mean that I’m passing the decision to them,” I assure him. “I just…can’t leave them out of the loop. Do you understand?”

“Evelyn,” he says warmly, “of course I understand. It’s right. Take time to talk to them, and then we’ll come back together. And then we’ll decide.”

I nod and rest my head back against his chest, allowing the conversation to fade away into the night.

It’s a troubled daze I fall into, then, with the worries of the world and questions of life and death, captivity and freedom on my mind. But the worries are washed away by the steady breathing of my mate beside me.

He, I know, will always bring me clarity. Always bring me faith.

And so my brow clears and I fall into a steady sleep.

I’m completely unaware, of course, that tomorrow everything was going to be better.

Because tomorrow is going to be one of the best days of my life.