Chapter 212

His Rogue Omega: Chapter 45.

✩ Cas✰

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“Alright, let’s talk.” The nerves in her voice, the arms crossed over her chest and the fidgeting of her

fingers all tell me Eva is terrified of how this conversation is going to go. I don’t know if she’s scared

that now the adrenaline has worn off that I’m going to start screaming or something worse.

“This is it right?” I hold up the piece of paper that was sitting on my desk, it’s a list I made of all the sh it

piling around me at the moment. Every man needs a way to get his head straight and mine has always

been a list, listing things out helps me figure out my next step. Eva’s head nods a little as she shyly

looks up at my hand. “When I was a pup my father and uncle had this habit of locking me in dark

places, cupboards mostly. There is this one cupboard in his office that is tiny, when you get locked in

you feel like the air is being sucked from your lungs.” I can feel the terror creeping in even as I speak of

the punishment hole but I power through, I need Eva to understand. “The more I screamed and cried,

the longer they would leave me there.”

“You learned to hold it inside.” It’s not a question which makes me think she’s familiar with the situation

I’m talking about, maybe not darkness but the vocalisation of pain making your punisher hurt you

more.

“I learned to hold it inside.” I smile at her but she’s so busy looking at her hands that she doesn’t see it.

“For me, I would make lists. At first I would list all the toys I had, sometimes the multiplications,

sometimes The Alpha Oath. Eventually I started to list the people who hurt me and how I would change

things when the Pack was finally mine.” I’ve

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never told anyone that I used to do this and voicing it allowed to Eva is not as hard as I thought it would

be. “This,” I pop the piece of paper onto her lap and she slowly picks it up. “I made this one night when

all- I wanted to do was climb into bed with you. I just wanted to hold you while you had a nightmare. I

needed to keep my hands busy so I wouldn’t invade your personal space, I knew you weren’t ready for

me to be that close.”

I scrub my hands over my face as I wait for Eva to say something, the stubble on my face is telling me I

should s have. After a few minutes it’s clear she’s not going to say anything so I start speaking again.

“I understand how this list looks when you don’t understand the meaning. I also understand why it

would scare you and make you run. What I don’t understand is why Sookie’s scent is all over my desk

and chair.” Probably not the most important thing to worry about but I would bet my left hand that b itch

had something to do with Eva running.

“She came in while I was in your office.” I lean back in my chair, looking at Eva, I wait for her to explain

but she doesn’t say anything else.

“And?” For the first time in a while she looks up at me, her blue eyes are red and I can see the tears

she’s trying to hold back. I’m not sure why she’s crying. I haven’t done or said anything to upset her. I’m

just trying to understand what happened so I can stop it from happening again. “Why are you crying?”

Eva just shakes her head.

“She told me you were at someone called Mary’s house, that you used to play together as pups and

that everyone thought you would be together.” I close my eyes and tilt my head back, it seems I’ve

ignored this Sookie situation long enough, I really need to deal with this female. “She told me that you

had plenty of females around you and

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that I should just shoo.”

“I’m sorry she said that to you, she had no right. She should never have been in that office without me

there.” I tighten my hands on the arms of the chair to stop myself from flying from the room and finding

Sookie. What she did might not seem so bad but she knew Eva was under my protection and that I was

keeping her here for a reason, so she knew that sending Eva away would only pi ss me off.

“Neither should I. I never intended to go in fully. I was just checking to see if you were in there, the door

is normally locked when you’re not.” Eva holds up the list, “I never intended to sit down let alone be

found in there. I just got caught up when I saw my name on here and then when I read more of it I was

confused as to why my name was paired with these things.” I lean forward and pluck the list from her

hands, looking down at it I try to see it as she would.

“Which part confused you?” I focus on the first thing, it’s Eva’s name. I’ve written over it so many times

it’s almost bold and the impression of the pen can be felt on the back of the paper.

“The second and third mainly,” I look and see human/drugs and rogue/ murderer, it’s then that it clicks.

She thinks I’m connecting her to the drugs Jeremy is suspected of dealing and she thinks the rogue is

her.

“You killed someone I don’t know about?” Eva shakes her head quickly, it sends her hair flying over her

shoulders so I can see her bare neck and collar bone. “It’s Eric, he might not be as clean as we think. I

don’t know the full story yet but I’m keeping an eye on him. If he’s as dangerous as I think he might be

then I need to make sure he doesn’t affect this Pack.” I don’t want any secrets from Eva, I’ve seen what

secrets can do in a mating and I won’t have it between me and her. “I wrote your name next to the

human/drugs because I wanted to ask you more about the club set up Jeremy has.”

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“That’s it?” Her shoulders drop and the relief on her face makes me chuckle, “I really overreacted.”

“You said it yourself, Ghost has been whispering to you and then add in Sookie. I’m not surprised you

ran but I’m glad you stopped.” She smiles at me as she wipes at her face, “will you tell me why the

tears now?” Eva half laughs, half sniffles as she smiles at me.

“I’m sorry you had to go through all of that pain as a child, Rowan told me some of it, I thought that was

the worst but no one should be locked up like that.” Standing from the chair I watch her eyes go straight

to where my joggers are sitting low on my hips, I’m not a vain man but I know I look good. I look after

my body so I know what she’s looking at isn’t the average male body. She slowly licks her bottom lip, I

doubt she even realises she’s admiring me with a look of hunger on her face. No matter what she said

earlier I doubt anyone has made her feel the way I do, it’s impossible because I’m her mate.

“Don’t feel sorry for me Angel, I got through it and now I’m here, with you and with my Pack. I can’t

change the past but I can make sure no one else suffers within this house.” I smile at her as I walk over

towards the drawers, I need her dressed if we are going to talk anymore, there is only so long I can

look at her in nothing but a towel.

“Why is my name at the top of the list?” I turn to her with a t-shirt in my hands, she’s still sitting on the

bed but she’s shifted so she’s facing me. The towel has wrapped around her waist and is revealing the

top of her thigh.

“You can ask any Alpha in the world and they will all tell you the same thing. No matter who their Luna

is, whether she’s fated or chosen, no matter if they have pups or not. His Pack will always come first.” I

walk towards the bed and drop the t-shirt next to her, putting a hand on either side of her legs, I lean in

close and sniff up her neck.

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“Cas,” her tone is a warning and plea at the same time, my mate has no idea what she wants or needs.

I’m bringing out feelings within her that she has no idea how to control or manage.

“No Eva, you need to hear this.” I lean back so I’m looking her in the eye. I need her to see the truth

within my own eyes. “I’m the exception to the rule because of you. I’ve longed for you ever since I

found out what mates were. I knew you were out there waiting for me, I knew I would find you, I’ve

always known it.” I can’t help but lean in to sniff her again, right under her ear her scent is the most

intoxicating. I can’t stop myself from slowly licking the spot, her shiver has me pulling back and

smirking at her. “Now that I have you, I’m not letting you go. You are my first priority, it will always be

you, I’ll never hurt you because I’m incapable of it. I need you too much and Angel, you need me too.”

My voice has gone low and I can’t stop the small growl from slipping between my lips, Storm is urging

me to claim Eva now.

“That’s a lot of pressure, Cas.” Her eyes are on my lips. I can see that she wants to lean in but her

mind is holding her back. At times, Eva really is her worst enemy.

“Not really, we are two broken pieces of the same soul. We are fated to make each other whole, if you

let yourself, you’d feel it too. Give me time and I’ll sew us back together until we are stronger than

ever.” I hold her eyes for a long time, my arms start to shake from leaning into her but I don’t move. I

need her to see that I mean every word I’m

saying.

“Alright.” I feel my eyes go wide as she whispers the one word that sends my heart soaring, Storm is

suddenly jumping around with happiness as she opens the door to the possibility of us.

“Alright?” I need to hear her say it because right now my mind is working over time.

“I’m not promising I’ll wake up tomorrow wanting your mark on me but

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I’ll try, I’ll try to be the person you want me to be.” I close my eyes and drop my head for a second,

clearly I haven’t explained myself as well as I thought, I don’t want Eva to be anyone but her.

“Angel. I just want you to be you. The perfectly imperfect you, I wouldn’t change a thing about you. I

thank the Goddess everyday that you happened to be in the Swiftmane Pack at the same time as me.

It was the day the light came on in the dark for me.” I can’t hold back anymore, leaning in I claim her,

the only place we are touching is our lips yet my entire body feels like it’s on fire.