Chapter 5 ۵ Worthless

YARA'S POV

It was 7pm. I stood outside of Professor Alejandro Moreno's office. With a deep breath I knocked on the door and walked in.

"Yes, sir" I spoke, taking a seat as his eyes roamed up and down me.

"No makeup? That's a change Miss Malik. Did we words really hurt that deep" he taunted. I couldn't believe it. The fact he has the audacity to think I wore no makeup because of him. I wondered if his wife was this much of a bitch.

"Is this why you've called me here? To mock me?" My eyes started watering as I got up from the chair. He watched my every move taking a sip out of his cup filled with alcohol. How stressed must this man be to drink that much alcohol?

He carried on even though I was picking up my bag, ready to leave. "I spoke to you about tutoring yesterday" he stated, waiting for me to stop in my tracks.

"And?" I replied wincing my eyes trying to see where this would go.

"I have a solution for you" I slowly sat back down. I wonder what his solution would be? Probably another way to mock me.

I silently waited for him to say more "I'll tutor you for free" I looked up at him with furrowed brows and an unblinking gaze. I was slightly taken aback.

"W-what do you mean?"

"You don't speak English?" He razed.

"But why would you want to tutor me Mr Moreno? I'm your least favourite student remember?" He let out a light chuckle.

"You're falling dangerously behind Miss Malik. If you fail that would look bad for me" right....so he wasn't even doing it to be nice, he was doing it so he wouldn't look like a failing teacher.

"Thanks for the offer Professor, but I'd rather not spend more time with you than needed. And besides you're only helping me to make yourself look better, not because you care" i played with the hem of my shirt to which he stared with amusement.

"You're right I don't care about you. But if you were smart you'd take this offer" he waited for my reply. "According to you I'm not smart so no I won't take your stupid offer" I got up off my seat and left the room. I didn't turn around to see what he looked like because I already knew he was annoyed at my response.

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Ugh how do you do this stupid equation. I yelled to myself pulling at my hair.

It was 6am and I was still up learning how to do this equation. I didn't get it and in my defence Mr Moreno was too quick for me to keep up.

I was sleep deprived and frustrated with myself and to make it worse my first lecture started at 6am. I rushed washed my face and brushed my teeth, did my hair and threw on a shirt and a pair of loose joggers.

Rushing down to the lecture hall I realised I was already late. Mr Moreno had already started his lecture. I made my way up the steps to the second row where I found an empty seat. All eyes were on me, including Mr Perfect's.

Near end of the lecture I could feel my eyes practically shutting. And before I knew it I had dozed off.

"Yara. Sir's going to shout at you, you might want to wake up" Selena the girl from my course told me before leaving as footsteps approached her. My eyes flickered open and before me stood the great Aljenandro Moreno.

I immediately straightened up "did my lecture bore you?" He gave me a stern look.

"N-no I'm sorry I just....I didn't sleep at night so...." he waited for me to finish my sentence but I didn't know what else to say.

"You haven't wrote down anything" he stated whilst acknowledging the emptiness on my book. I could tell he was judging me.

"I-I"

"Do you even remember anything I've said? Or were you sleeping thought the whole class?" He asked already knowing my answer.

"S-something about u-um....v squared....equals.....um" he looked at me before letting out a derisive laugh making me beyond embarrassed. I looked down at my fingers to distract myself from how shit I felt "I'm sorry" I murmured.

"Follow Me" he spoke before going to the front of the lecture hall and rubbing away all of the pen previously on there.

"Sit and listen. Take notes this time Malik because I won't repeat myself a third time" I was shocked he was going through the whole lecture again.

"Y-you don't have to waste your time I'll go over everything from things online. It's my fault anyways I should've listened instead of falling aslee-" he abruptly cut me off.

"The equation is..." he began explaining the proper equation. Going slowly, actually waiting for me to write down what I needed before moving on. Not once did I open my mouth to speak until he called me up to answer a question on the board. I walked up to him and grabbed the pen.

I wrote down the first part of my working outs before rubbing them out. Why did he give me the hardest one? I pouted.

Then I started again looking up at him for reassurance to see if I was going in the right direction and I don't know what I expected but he gave no response. His face stayed monotone giving away no hint on whether or not I was working. Biting my lip I continued to concentrate as I wrote down the next part. A few minutes went by as he watched my every step. I was surprised he didn't get annoyed over how long I was taking. Finally, I wrote down my final answer "here" I gave him the pen back. I couldn't help but feel a sense of accomplishment when he told me my answer was correct "you took way too long to get there" he rubbed out everything I wrote down making me roll my eyes.

"Try this one" a whole hour passed by as I was doing questions he gave me, getting better and better at them.

"Good, took you an average amount of time compared to your other attempts" was it that hard for this man to give compliments. Whatever, I guess I'll take what I can get.

"Thanks Sir" I spoke as I put away everything in my bag. Even though I hated him it was nice he took time out of his day to help me out when it was clearly my fault I didn't understand the topic in the first place.

"Are you taking me up on that offer?" He asked putting away his glasses.

It took me a few minutes "Alright, I guess I probably do need the help"

"Alright then, tomorrow 6pm at my office. Don't waste my time" he instructed.

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The daily tutoring sessions with Professor Moreno were becoming more than just a struggle, they were a test of my sanity. Despite the cold, dark environment of his office, I felt the weight of his disdain growing heavier with each passing day.

When I arrived for our 6pm session today, I noticed something different as I approached his office: a faint smell of alcohol lingered in the hallway. I shook off the uneasy feeling and knocked on the door.

"Come in," came the slurred command. I hesitated for a moment before pushing the door open. The sight that greeted me was unexpected. Moreno, usually so composed and controlled, was sitting behind his desk with a glass of whiskey in hand. His dark blue eyes, normally so piercing, were now clouded and unfocused.

"Y- Miss Malik" he said, his voice thick with inebriation "you're on time. I suppose you're here to waste my evening with more of your ineptitude" he seethed. He was drunk....i think......

I stepped inside, my nerves on edge. The smell of alcohol was stronger now, and Mr Moreno's demeanor was noticeably off. He seemed less like the stern professor he was and more like a petulant, angry drunk.

"Good evening, Professor" I said, trying to keep my voice steady.

He waved a dismissive hand, nearly spilling his drink. "Yes.......yes. Let's get this over with. I've got better things to do than babysit you"

He pushed a stack of papers toward me, his movements unsteady. "Here are the problems you failed to grasp. I'm sure you'll manage to mess these up as well"

As I began to work through the problems, I could feel Moreno's eyes on me, but his gaze was unfocused and wandering. Occasionally, he would take a swig from his glass, his actions almost exaggerated in their clumsiness.

"You're struggling again," he said with a mocking tone, his voice slurred. "What a fucking surprise" he fired making me flinch.

His sarcasm was biting, and his slurred speech only made it worse. I tried to ignore the sting of his words as I worked, but it was difficult with his constant interruptions.

"Look at this," he said, his tone dripping with condescension. "Even my daughter could solve this. You, on the other hand, seem to have a natural talent for being stupid"

Each correction he made came with a sneer or a dismissive remark. His drunken state only seemed to amplify his cruelty, making his mockery all the more cutting.

At one point, he leaned closer, his breath heavy with alcohol.

"How did you ever get into this course?" he asked, his voice dripping with disdain "Did you bribe someone? Or was it just a case of sheer luck?" I could feel the tears threatening to spill as I tried to focus on the problems. His harshness, combined with the intoxicated state, made every mistake feel like a personal failure.

"I'm s-sorry" I said, my voice trembling.

His words were like a punch to the gut, but I forced myself to continue. His hand suddenly slamming down on the desk with a force that made me flinch. The loud bang echoed in the small office, making my heart race.

"What's wrong?" his voice was harsh. "Did I scare you?" He laughed menacingly at me, mocking me. Tears stung my eyes. "N-no" I stuttered carrying on with my problem.

He sat back down on his seat, taking his tie off, revealing that tattoos on his neck.

Before I could finish my question he reached over and snatched the pen from my hand with a rough, almost violent grip. "Let me show you how to do this, since you clearly can't manage it on your own," he said, his voice echoing with a cruel edge. He was letting out everything he genuinely thought of me now that he was drunk.

He began to solve the problems with an exaggerated precision, his movements aggressive and mocking. Each stroke of the pen was deliberate, each correction accompanied by a biting comment. My hands shook as I tried to follow his example, tears blurring my vision. The harshness in his voice was unbearable, and every time I made a mistake, he responded with increasing scorn.

When I hesitated, he abruptly slammed the marker down on the desk, the sound sharp and jarring. "Are you so incompetent that you can't even follow basic instructions?" The force of his frustration made me flinch again, and I could no longer hold back my tears. They streamed down my face as I tried to keep working, but the effort only seemed to make things worse. His eyes, dark and unforgiving, watched every movement with a cold, calculating gaze. The fact I was crying set off something inside of him.

"You're a mess" he scoffed, his voice dripping with mockery. "Crying because you can't handle a simple math problem. How pathetic" he jeered. His words were like daggers, each one cutting deeper than the last. I tried to control my sobs, but it was no use. The humiliation and the relentless barrage of his criticism were too much.

Finally, he leaned back in his chair, his gaze unyielding. He didn't even feel the slightest bit sorry for me "I think that's enough for today. You've managed to prove that you're as useless as I suspected" I continued to sob in front of him it was as if his cries were music to his ears because he didn't even seem the smallest bit affected. Instead he took a cigarette from his pocket and lit it whilst opening a window.

"What are you still doing here? Get the fuck out" he commanded, taking a puff of his cigarette. I gathered my things with trembling hands, the tears still streaming down my face.

"Don't bother coming back tomorrow, you're useless and there's no point in trying to help you" he called out, his tone dismissive.

I fled his office, the weight of his words heavy on my shoulders. The tears flowed freely as I walked back to my dorm, the sting of his cruel remarks echoing in my mind. I felt utterly defeated, the harshness of his criticism cutting through me like a knife. Back in my room, Heidi came over, her concern evident. "Yara, what happened my love" she said practically running up to me taking me in my arms.

I collapsed onto my bed, the sobs escaping uncontrollably. "I hate him Heidi. I don't know how I'm going to get through this stupid course. He was drunk and so fucking mean to me. I don't know if I can take this anymore" I sobbed.

Heidi sat beside me, her face a mixture of anger and sympathy. "Yara baby, you don't deserve this honestly. You don't deserve to be treated like that. No one should have to endure that kind of humiliation, especially from someone who's supposed to be helping you. You need to take a few days off" she proposed a tempting offer.

"I want to skip but he'll only hate me more. I don't know what to do" I cried into her arms.

Her words were a small comfort, but they couldn't erase the pain of the evening. I felt so stupid, the thought of facing Moreno again the next day for my lecture was almost unbearable. But I had no choice I had to go or else he would hate me even more. I couldn't fail this course because of him. I just had to ignore him and his hatred for me.

A/N

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