Chapter 125

“The truth?” I muttered. It’s what I asked for, so what was the problem? Was it because I didn’t want to hear the truth, or was it because I wasn’t ready to forgive him?

“You can tell me the full truth after I’m done eating.” I told him as the food arrived. Christian looked in horror as I accepted the full bag of food and ripped it open. “Are you not going to say it?” I teased him.

It was a habit of his to tell me not to get anything dirty, whether it was his car, the kitchen, the room that used to be ours, or the big stain I left on the couch.

“You can do whatever you want. I just want to talk to you.” Christian spoke through the pain. He was willing to go as far as letting me dirt the car-just so he could talk to me. I shrugged my shoulders and ate my food while Christian stared at me. He never stopped staring.

I missed the words, Serena, look at me. He used to say it at the most random times and as creepy as it might sound, would even watch me in my sleep.

“I didn’t miss the sound of your smacking” He chuckled while he wiped my mouth clean.

“So tell me, why did you cheat?” I asked after taking my last bite. I was not prepared to go through everything again, but maybe it would help me move on. It was what I needed to hear and I had to accept the truth. “Because I was stupid.”

“No. I mean how-beginning to end. How and why? Was I not good enough for you?” I asked. It was a thought which had been swimming around in my head, but I couldn’t find an answer. “No, it wasn’t you- it was me,” Christian spoke. “It wasn’t because you’re not good enough. It was because I’m not good enough.”

“I’m glad you know,” I mumbled. It felt good to hear it from his mouth. It wasn’t me-it was him. “We had a phone call. You told me to do whatever I wanted to do-I was drunk, and I misunderstood.”

“People get drunk all the time. They still don’t cheat on each other.” I sighed at his poor excuse. No matter how much he drank that night, cheating shouldn’t have even been an option. “I know that’s not an excuse, and I know I can’t take back what I did, and I wanted to tell you the truth-but I know what kind of person you are, I was being selfish and I didn’t want you to leave me.”

“No, you don’t know me.” I sighed. If he really knew me, he would’ve told me from the start. “I’m always willing to talk things out, and if I knew the truth from the beginning, things wouldn’t have turned out like this.”

“I really was planning on telling you, but I didn’t want to lose you.” Christian defended his words.

“You let Gina walk beside you for over four months, I befriended her, and you never said a word.”

“I did it for my dad,” Christian said. “He was so happy with Gina and her work, and he could finally rest. I did not want to take that away from him-”

“So you decided to take away my happiness instead?”

“No,” Christian spoke and grabbed my hand. “I didn’t want you to lose your smile. I made a mistake, and I’m sorry.”

It seemed as if I was trying to run away from his apology, while I shouldn’t. I still felt betrayed, and I was pissed, but there’s was nothing I could do or say to change it. The damage had already been done. “It was a one-time thing. I was selfish, immature, and if I could take back my actions and my words, I would.”

We were both being selfish and immature in the way we handled things, and it wasn’t about us anymore. It was about Siena and we had to do the right thing for our daughter.

“I forgive you.” I spoke, ashamed, as if I was going to regret those words. “I know you’ve changed a lot as a person, and I know you haven’t touched alcohol in ages and that you’re trying to do better, so I forgive you.”

“You do?” Christian chuckled. “If you forgive me, that means we can go back to being-

“Siena’s parents” I immediately stopped him from even finishing that sentence. I forgave him, but we could never be buddies, and we could never be in a toxic relationship again. Too much had happened, and our families were not on good terms. I didn’t even want them to find out about this, so we could be co- parents instead. “Right.” Christian smiled. “We can go back to being Siena’s parents without our families interfering.”

“But first.” I sighed. “We should come clean about everything so something like this will not happen in the future.”

“I’ll start,” Christian spoke as he took a deep breath. “I have four more things to confess.”

There was even more to confess?

“I moved Gina to an apartment because my dad asked me to take care of her,” Christian confessed.

It was supposed to bother me, but it didn’t. At least he was telling me the truth. “You put her in a bad neighborhood so that I can give you a pass,” I spoke as I waited for his next confession.

“I might’ve encouraged my family to find me a lawyer so I can see Siena more, which is clearly not necessary anymore.” Christian sighed and waited for my reaction. “That’s funny. I did the exact same thing I laughed as I scratched the back of my neck.

“When you came back to get your stuff, I wasn’t supposed to be there, but Isobel told me because she promised to help me out, so…” Christian explained. I told Beau, Beau told her, and she told Christian. “Isobel…it seems like she’s been causing trouble in more ways than one.”

my “Why, what happened?” Christian asked, concerned. “Nothing.” I sighed. “Except the fact that dad doesn’t want her with Beau and that Beau is taking out his anger on me, absolutely nothing.”

“I’m sorry.” Christian apologized. “Don’t bother. It’s not your fault.” I smiled as my hand moved to his.

I was being extremely touchy after claiming I wanted to get over him.

“I’ll just have to deal with it. The only way for my dad to ever accept her is if the Sala’s forgive Isobel and her dad, which is not going to happen any time soon, so.” I complained about my personal issues, but Christian didn’t care. He listened to every single word I had to say.

“Do you forgive her?” He asked. “Yes, I forgive her.” I nodded my head. It might’ve sounded a bit crazy because I was angry at Christian for threatening my family while Isobel actually put my life in danger- but if Beau was happy, so was I. “So anyway, what’s the thing you said about your dad planning a family shoot?”

“Yes, very tiring.” Christian yawned. “He only came with the idea today, and I actually don’t even think it’s a good idea, but if you keep your family in control-I’ll keep mine in control.”

“Then why did you agreed to it?” I wondered. “It’s because it is probably his last request, and he also wants Enzo to be in the pictures. He obviously misses him a lot.” Christian smiled.

It was understandable. Even though Lucio’s attention mainly went to Christian, Enzo’s attention went to his dad. Back in the days when I still used to work at the club, I had already concluded that Gio and Enzo were the most hungry for his attention. “He distanced himself from the family, including us. I haven’t heard from him in four months, and I don’t even know what he’s up to” Christian spoke.

“That’s because he’s ashamed, but there’s nothing to be ashamed about” I smiled. “He did the same thing as Isobel, but for some reason forgiving him was a little bit easier”

“Yes, because he was clearly mentally unstable, and Isobel was just obsessed with me.” Christian chuckled. That was a pretty accurate conclusion.

“I took some cute pictures of Siena. Do you want to see them?” I asked Christian, who immediately leaned in closer. He was probably dying to ask more questions about Siena but was too afraid to ruin a good moment. “Yes, please show me.”

Christian grabbed my phone and scrolled through the pictures with a big smile on his face. How was I even planning on taking Siena away from him when he loved her that much? No human would do that. “Can I send them to myself?” Christian smile. “Yes, sure.”

“So what are you doing tomorrow? Do you think I can see her tomorrow?” He asked. All he wanted was to see his daughter, and I almost took away that right because of my twisted family.

“Sorry, not tomorrow-but we can do something the day after,” I suggested while I ignored the sad pout on Christian’s face. “I’m meeting up with Dario. Since we’ve decided to tell each other the truth, I might as well throw it out there.”

Christian tried to remain calm, but I could feel his anger. “So you’re still going to hang out with my enemy?”

“It’s just to set up a charity, we’re not getting married, and I’m not helping him with his evil plan to ‘destroy you.” I laughed at the nervous look on Christian’s face. “Just please be careful. We don’t know him that well, and I have no idea what his problem is.”

“Christian, stop overreacting.” I sighed. “Dario is actually a really nice person. He kind of reminds me of Vince.”

“Vince!?” Christian gasped. “I know we miss him a lot, but not poor Vince. Keep him out of this.” He spoke as I burst out laughing at his reaction. “Please tell me you don’t have feelings for him.”

“No.” I laughed at his weird accusation. “It’s just for work, and that’s it. I don’t have feelings for him.”

Dario was great company, and yes, I had a slight crush on him-but feelings? Absolutely not. The only person I had eyes for was Christian, and now that we were not together, I only had time to focus on my daughter. Siena was not even a toddler.

“Although I don’t agree, I trust your judgment, and I want you to know that I’m really proud of you,”

Christian spoke. “And just so you know, I’ve never stopped donating”

“I should pat you on the shoulder for spending your billions the way you should be spending them.

You’re so amazing, Christian!” I spoke sarcastically as I patted him on his shoulder. Christian gave me an embarrassed look and hid his flushed cheeks.

“What’s wrong? Why are you being cute.” I coord while I pinched him in his cheeks. It felt nice to get along. and I missed his presence. “I know you’re a good person. You don’t have to tell me.” I smiled.

I was too afraid to admit it, but it was the truth. There were many bad people in the world, and despite hurting me several times, Christian was not one of them. “You should drive me home. It’s getting really late.”

Christian drove me back in silence, but it was a comfortable silence. We had such a great talk that it even made me wonder why I was so scared of him in the first place. There was no reason for me to fear him.

“Is there really no chance of us getting back together?” Christian asked. I was afraid of that question and secretly hoped he wouldn’t have the nerve to ask that.

“I want Siena to grow up in a happy environment.” I sighed. All of our issues were out there in the open. and getting back together would damage both of us. Everyone would judge us, and it would be too embarrassing. Our families didn’t like each other anymore, and I was not in the mood for awkward thanksgiving dinners.

“We were happy before everything.” Christian spoke. “We were happy for four months.” I corrected him.

Christian took a hopeless breath and stopped the car. “We’re here.” He spoke, defeated. He knew that he did not have the right to get angry, not after everything what we had been through.

“I still need my space, and I want to move on from all of this, and so should you,” I told him. Despite our family drama, it was still not smart to get back together. I trusted him, but not enough to get back together.

“I understand. I’m sorry.” Christian apologized. “Just letting me see Siena is enough for now, so you better keep your promise.”

“I will. We’ll meet up in two days.” I reassured him. “By the way, what was your fourth confession?

You never told me.”

*I’m still in love with you.” Christian spoke. “I love you, and I don’t care if you don’t love me back.”

“Obsessed much.” I chuckled. I didn’t want to hear those words because I felt the same way-but us not being together would be the best for everyone. There was no point in having a relationship if the relationship was toxic.

Christian turned to face me and rested his hand on my cheek. “Yes, I’m obsessed-and maybe if you give me a clear answer, I can stop this obsession, so I’m asking you one more time. Is there absolutely no way of us getting back together?”

I tried to find the word, no, but I couldn’t. I was just as obsessed with him as he was with me, which was why the cheating affected me so much in the first place.

“I will call you so we can meet up. Goodnight.” I spoke in a hurry and rushed out of the car. I was so disappointed with myself because it was just one simple word-and I couldn’t say it.

Christian didn’t understand the situation, but I knew it wouldn’t take that long before he finally would.

We had both agreed to keep our peace hidden from our families, but that would not change the fact that they still hated each other.

We could raise Siena together, but there was no way for us to be together.