Hold Me

“Welcome back home, Miss Natalia. Greetings, Master Zak,” Reiner said professionally before he offered us a bow.

“Take care of Natalia,” Zak said briskly before he placed his warm hand on the top of my head.

Before I could say anything, Zak turned to leave and soon I was alone with Reiner in the doorway.

“You should come inside. Frankly, you look half dead at best,” Reiner commented as he pulled me by the arm inside the mansion after him.

…

I don’t know how many times this scene has taken place before, but I was sure that it has happened often lately, I thought as I glanced over at Reiner who was sitting on the side of my bathtub. Reiner had prepared a warm bath for me, and he had decided to keep me company while I soak in the warm water.

I felt so tired, but the peaceful silence was helping heal my disturbed mind.

“Natalia, is everything ok?” Reiner spoke up softly. His voice full of worry and concern for me.

“Yea,” I replied emotionlessly as I closed my eyes.

“Sorry, wrong question. You can let me know if something is troubling you, I may not be able to help, but I’m willing to listen,” Reiner kindly offered.

“Thank you,” I replied as I offered him the best smile I could muster up at that moment.

Without the will to carry on the conversation Reiner had put in the effort to start, we lapsed back again into silence. Once more I closed my eyes as my mind wandered around touching various thoughts on its own.

I think I must have dozed off in the bathtub because the next thing I knew, I was being scooped up into Reiner’s strong arms. Instinctively, I wrapped my arms around his neck as I leaned my face against his strong chest. Feeling his familiar warmth and scent filled me with positive energy and a sense of peace.

“You should not sleep here for too long, I’ll take you to bed so you can sleep properly,” Reiner coax softly and sweetly into my ear before he carried me all the way to my bed.

I felt the softness of the bed against my naked back when Reiner carefully placed me onto the bed. I offered him a weak smile as thanks and was rewarded with his warm smile. Having Reiner here with me was much better than being all alone, especially in times like these.

“It’s ok, R. I’ll sleep naked…” I told him softly when I figured that he was going to grab my clothes to dress me for bed. I honestly didn’t have the physical or mental strength to deal with that task right now.

“Alright,” Reiner readily agreed. I guess he could sense my exhaustion.

“Thank you…R…” I whispered as I felt my eyelids grow even heavier and I closed my eyes once more.

“Good night, Natalia,” Reiner said before placing a tender kiss on my forehead.

…

When I woke up it was still dark. Glancing at the clock showed that it was early in the morning a little before the break of dawn. Unsurprisingly, Reiner had fallen sleep in his seat next to my bed while holding my hand. I smiled a little at the sight of his handsome sleeping face that I could make out in the dim light.

It didn’t surprise me anymore that he would be by my side, and I had to make sure that I appreciated his care for me every time. I refused to take his kindness for granted. I must have stirred around too much when I woke because in the next instant, Reiner was already fully awake and alert.

“Morning, Natalia,” Reiner greeted me with a smile as his long fingers caressed the back of the hand that he held in his.

“Good morning, R,” I replied, offering him a sweet smile as I squeezed his large hand back.

Reiner got up from his seat enough to switch on the lamp on my bedside to give us more light to see each other.

“You look better than when you got home yesterday,” Reiner comment with relief in his voice.

“It was a rough…couple of days…” I confessed with a huge sigh. I didn’t know I had been holding in a sigh that massive.

“I won’t push you if you don’t want to talk about it. Just rest, ok?” Reiner said as he kissed the back of my hand and then my fingertips. I found this gesture of affection so touching.

“Hold me…” I pleaded softly as I looked directly at his handsome face.

“Now?” Reiner asked a little taken aback.

“Yes. Hold me, R. I have some things that I want to tell you…” I said sweetly as I pulled lightly on his hand.

Reiner got into bed with me and positioned me so that I was sitting in between his legs with my back to him. I loved this position because I could feel his warmth and I could lean my head back on his broad chest. His arms hugged around me loosely and I could hear the steady sound of his heartbeat.

“Don’t push yourself,” Reiner said warmly as he kissed my temple.

I had so many bombs in my arsenal that I wasn’t sure which one I wanted to drop first. Maybe I should just do it in chronological order?

“Edward proposed to me. I mean, he’s done it once before as well, but I think this time he’s very serious…” I told Reiner, a little surprised at how steady my voice sounded.

“I see…and?” Reiner replied with no hint of surprise. His long fingers toying with strains of my hair as he listened to me intently.

“Lucien…also proposed to me. The night of his wedding. Honestly, I don’t know what to make of it,” I said without bothering to hide the frustration in my voice.

“Do you want to marry him?” Reiner asked after a slight pause.

“…I’m not sure…” I replied honestly.

Marry Lucien seemed like a complicated business, and I wasn’t sure if that was what I wanted even though, I thought that it had been my dream all along. Now that the opportunity was staring me in the face, I wasn’t sure that I wanted to marry him. Worst, I couldn’t imagine what marrying him would be like.

“Hmm…and?” Reiner continued with his prompting. I guess he knew there was more because I did return home with Zak despite leaving from the wedding venue with Lucien. I sighed.

“Zak…told me that he has decided to marry Annie,” I said in a deflated voice.

Arranged marriages for the Rosenhalls was common or even mandatory. However, I couldn’t imagine it playing out well for Zak or for Annie. Then again if both of them consented to it who was I to intervene?

By this time, I should know better than anyone that people can get married for many other reasons besides love.

“It’s unfortunate but I’m sure you and everyone else saw that coming,” Reiner replied flatly. It was true.

We all saw it coming.

--To be continued…