Chapter Fifteen

Tess lay peacefully in her hospital bed catching up on some well-earned sleep. How someone could shut off and nap after what she just went through, he couldn't understand. Cole watched her for a moment. The early morning sun streamed in through the gap in the curtains, softening the stark, sterile room. Her chest rose and fell and a small smile played on her lips. Such beauty, even after all that trauma. What he'd witnessed last night had made the trauma of his horse-riding accident a few months ago seem inconsequential. And despite the harsh reality of birth, it ended well. In fact, perfectly.

The little bundle in his arms wriggled and drew his attention back to the baby shrouded in a blue blanket. It was difficult to tell who he looked like just yet as his little face was still puffy and discolored. The baby blinked up at him, with one eye open slightly more than the other. A small frown crossed his son's face. Who knew they could frown already?

Cole ran his fingertip down along the baby's nose, the skin was unlike anything he had felt before. Almost like satin, or felt, no, something totally new to him. So soft and unprotected. This little guy was exposing him to new things just hours after his birth. He sure was in for an adventure, one that would last many years. He snuck another peek at Tess, he'd made a decision. After all the excitement had settled down and he had time to sit here with himself, he knew. He would do anything in his power to keep them a family.

Not just for the good of the baby, if he was honest with himself, he needed her in his life. He wanted her in his life. A dull life, full of flitting between business meetings and the ranch had consumed him since he was 18 years old. It was what he'd come to expect and what he thought he'd wanted. Until Tess. She barged into his life, a dripping wet mermaid and turned him upside down.

Chaotic, spontaneous and now possibly crazy, she added color to his bland existence and without her, he'd be gray again. It was what she feared for their child and he understood that now. He completely got why she ran away when she discovered she was pregnant. After all, why would she want a boring suit like him? She could have any man she wanted. An exciting man.

She deserved better and he would do whatever it took to become that man for her. Hell, he'd jump out of a plane, run a marathon or swim with sharks if it kept her with him. She shifted her weight, stirring under his gaze. Her eyes fluttered open and she smiled at him.

"You're still here." She said, her voice raspy.

He stood and slowly crept his way over to her and gently placed the baby in her arms, slowly sneaking his arms out from under the tiny boy. "I'm not going anywhere." He replied.

He reached out and poured her a glass of water, opened a fresh straw and placed it in the cup. He held it up for her and she leaned forward and drew back hard on the straw over and over until the final bit of water slurped loudly in the bottom.

He propped himself on the end of the bed and watched as Tess fed their baby. She was everything their little boy needed. The child gulped away like he'd been doing it for years. Babies were unbelievable, how did they just know how to do stuff? Maybe his son was just advanced for his age. Tess didn't seem to mind him watching the baby feeding, she was a natural.

"Tess, we really need to talk." He ran his hands through his hair and ran them down over his face. He rubbed his eyes before facing her again.

Tess barely glanced up from the baby in her arms. "Uh-oh, nothing great ever starts with, we need to talk."

"Well, I'm kind of hoping you will think this is pretty good." He said the words but he didn't believe them. The fear she would run again, terrified him. He squeezed his hands into fists to stop them from shaking. Million-dollar business deals didn't faze him, but asking Tess to be a proper family had his stomach in knots.

Nausea overwhelmed him, thoughts of changing the subject consumed him.

"Can you undress him while I run him a bath?" Tess asked as she pulled the blanket from their tiny scrap of a boy and held him out to Cole.

Cole hesitated, just for a moment, before reaching out and taking him in his hands. The baby's tiny head wasn't even the size of his palm. He laid the newborn on the bed and carefuly peeled the jumpsuit away from his body. His wiry little arms were so delicate, Cole was scared they'd break as he attempted to free them from the towelling cloth.

This child.

His child, was so dependent on him and Tess at this point that a new resolve kicked in.

"You were going to say?" Tess prompted. He closed his eyes and let the sound of the running water spur him on. It was a great omen. They'd met when Tess was submerged in water and now she stood filling a plastic baby tub. Her hands were submerged as she tested the temperature of the bath.

"I think we should be a proper family. I want us to all stay together." The words broke out into the air and floated around for a minute before they landed in front of Tess.

She spun to face him with her mouth dropped open. Before gathering herself, she pushed her shoulders back, stuck her nose in the air, shuffled over and took the now naked baby. "Why this sudden change of heart?"

Her voice, so even, it was impossible to read her. But he'd started now, there was no turning back.

"It's not sudden. It's the way it always should have been."

She eased the baby into the bath and he let out a croaky grizzle. Delicately wiping his paper-thin skin with a soft white cloth. "Always? You mean always since you found out about the baby?"

"Well yes." Knowing it was a trap he said it anyway. "Yes, since I knew about the baby."

Looking over her shoulder at him, her eyes narrowed. "What about before that Cole?"

Although he was aware he was entering dangerous territory he wasn't exactly sure how or what he did wrong. So he chose to soldier forward. "Yes before that. Always Tess. From the moment you dripped water all over my thousand dollar shoes and thought nothing of it." He smiled at the memory.

"Well, what sort of person wears shoes like that to the river? That alone should have told me you're infuriating." She lifted their baby from the water. "Grab me that towel please."

He picked it up and held it open. She placed the baby in it and he wrapped it around the tiny body.

"Make sure you have his head." Tess reminded him.

"I know how to hold him; I'd never hurt my son." He furrowed his brow. He was unused to people questioning him and thinking of him as incapable.

"Sometimes people get hurt unintentionally." She grumbled.

Cole watched her as she rifled through the shopping bag he'd picked up from the gift store downstairs. He'd picked up every small, blue outfit they had. Hats, booties, blankets and diapers. She selected a fluffy blue bear jumpsuit, complete with a hoodie that had ears and a round puff that served as a tail.

"Our cub." He sighed. "Tess, I know you're hurt. But I need you to know it's always been you. I've never stopped wanting you."

"Really?" Her hands flew to her hips. "So why did you fire me and send me away then?" She kept her voice quiet, practically a whisper and it unnerved him more than if she just went on a rantage and was done with it.

"I... I have no idea what you're talking about." He placed the now dry bundle on the bed. Tess rushed to him immediately, diapering and changing him.

"Don't even try to lie to me Cole Washington. You didn't even have the balls to do it yourself. You sent your mother."

"What? No, I didn't. Why the hell would I fire you?"

"Maybe you'd had your fun, you got bored and you didn't want me hanging around."

He glared at her. Sucking air in through his nose and out through whistling lips. The vein in his neck throbbed.

"Is that what you think the extent of our relationship was?"

"You were lonely I guess. I was a maid, so I was there. I was available."

"Hell, are you kidding me? I didn't bed you because I thought you were an easy target."

"Well, why did you start this with me? Was it because you knew how much it would piss your father off?"

"You really think that's the sort of guy I am?" His eyes turned dark, while his skin seemed to pale. He glared at her like she was the wort on the back of a toad. Even when she was hiding her pregnancy from him and he'd found out, he'd never been this upset.

"Well, what other reason could it have been?" She practically screamed.

He gathered his jacket and walked to the door, where he stopped, turned and faced her. "It's called love." He said, his voice husky before he turned and stormed out the door, letting it bang shut behind him.