Chapter Eight

The kiss was all he could stand. Every moment with her sent his heart racing. The pounding against his chest as she pressed herself against him, blocked out all other sounds. Her lips, sweet and addictive. He could have kissed her for eternity.

The hurt that flashed across her face when he pulled away cut him. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her. He should hate her or at least resent her for running off when she did, but he couldn't. Every fibre of his being wanted her.

He stood in the middle of her bedroom, unsure if he should stay or go. Without question, staying was what he wanted, but what was the right thing to do? He took a few steps towards the door before he stopped and turned back to face her.

"Well?" She asked. "What are you waiting for? You know where the door is." Her shoulders were pushed back, her cute little upturned nose, stuck in the air.

He sighed and leaned back against the hinges. "Okay, I'll stay."

Pausing from her task of packing away her dirty laundry, she death stared him. There was no other way to put it, her eyes dark and sheltered by half-closed lids. "Don't do me any favors." She drawled and threw her sports bag into the corner of the room.

"I'm not. I don't want you here by yourself tonight. It's obvious you've had a bit of a scare."

She rolled her eyes. "Well, obviously I must still be in shock. There is no way I would have asked you to stay otherwise." She pulled at the corner of the blanket, straightening it back up.

His lips turned up at the corners as he made his way around to the other side of the bed and helped her smooth it out. "There, all nice and neat." He said.

She promptly threw back the blanket, let her robe drop to the floor and got into the bed, yanking the blanket up to her ears. "Make sure you turn off the light," she ordered.

He stood still for a moment and let out a heavy sigh. "You're a real pain in my ass you know that?"

"I sincerely hope so." She rolled over and shut her eyes.

Cole stalked over and switched on the small bedside, tiffany lamp. The leadlight splashed colors across the beige walls and he couldn't help but draw comparisons to the way Tess had turned up here in her bathrobe and pink hair and lit up, the beige that was him and his family. He turned flicked off the main light switch before crawling into bed next to Tess. Laying in the soft light, listening to her breath in and out, in and out. Her shoulder rising and falling with each breath causing the thin strap of her negligee to fall from her shoulder. His fingertips buzzed with the need to reach out and slide it all the way down, to kiss a trail along her shoulder, up her neck, and to her ear.

She turned over suddenly and caught him looking at her, she glared back at him. "Why are you staring at me?"

Caught off guard, he blinked at her, trying to work out what to say. Why was he staring at her? It's not like he hadn't had lovers in the past. What was it about her that had him so captivated? "Because you're beautiful." He settled for the cookie-cutter compliment. Although burning in his heart, it was so much more than her good looks that drew him to her like the missing piece of his puzzle.

"You're so full of shit Cole Washington. Look at this belly." She snapped and shocked him out of his reverie. She rolled onto her back and yanked her pink satin nightgown up to reveal her stomach. "I'm huge. I'm surprised I haven't split down the middle, I always feel queasy and I'm paler than Casper. So, quit looking at me, it pisses me off."

She continued to hurl abuse in his direction but he'd blocked her out. He was mesmerized by her swollen belly. It had grown since he'd seen it a short time ago, in her New York apartment. He couldn't help himself, he reached out a trembling hand and placed it lightly on her bare stomach. Heat seemed to filter through her body and into his palm. He rubbed his hand back and forth. If this was the only child he would ever have, he needed to make the most of it. He wanted to be a part of everything.

Right on cue, he felt a tiny blimp of action under his hand, he furrowed his brow and risked a quick glimpse at Tess, who was watching him with one eyebrow raised and a somewhat bemused look on her face.

"I...I'm sorry." He stuttered and pulled his hand away.

She smiled at him. "Don't be, he likes you." She grabbed his wrist and placed his hand back on her baby bump.

Coles' eyes lit up as his baby wriggled under his touch. He moved down in the bed so his face was even with Tess's tummy. "Hello, little guy. This is your father speaking. With a kick like that, I see sports in your future."

Tess couldn't hold it in any longer and started to laugh. The bump wiggled up and down like a basketball being dribbled by one of the globetrotters.

"I want you to stop making mommy so sick and start behaving." He continued. "We're all looking forward to meeting you so how about you make an appearance sometime soon hey?" Resting his cheek lightly against her skin he looked up at Tess. She was even more gorgeous when she laughed like that. A glint of light shimmied down her soft, rounded face giving her the appearance of someone carefree. He realized it was a trick of the light but it flashed back memories of their earlier times together. Back when she loved him. Or at least when he thought she had. How could he have gotten it so wrong?

A swift kick from their unborn child got him on the side of his face and booted him from his trip down memory lane and he was glad for it. He threw himself back playfully. "Do you see the skills this boy has already?"

She was still laughing and he fought desperately to keep her that way. This is how their life should have been. Filled with laughter and happiness, that had been the plan until she ran away. Now he was back to square one. At least he had the chance to experience it all again. If she let him.

Tess reached for her negligee and pulled it back down over her stomach. The satin stretched across her middle. She had the perfect bump, he thought. It sat rounded right at the front. All baby, the books called it. No added baby weight just all baby. Probably because she was always on her feet and didn't look after herself.

His eyes traveled up her body to her swollen breasts, the satin strained there too. "Doesn't look very comfortable." He nodded at her attire.

"I usually take it off to sleep." She said in barely a whisper, her cheeks turned a faint pink that traveled to the tips of her ears.

"Well... don't let me stop you."

Neither of them moved, the only sound was that of their breathing. Laying still, awareness buzzed between them. Unwilling to move should it break the spell, he continued to stay rigid, every inch that lay between them, taunted him like an obstacle daring him to overcome it.

Mustering some courage, he threw caution to the wind and moved closer to her. He took the scrap of material in his hands and pulled it, slowly, inching it up, over her head. She raised her arms up to help him and a feeling of satisfaction hit him and he fought to hold back a grin. Tossing the negligee to the floor he watched as Tess used her arms to cover herself.

"Don't do that. I never want you to do that." He growled and pulled her arms down to her sides so he could look at her.

"But..." She began to protest.

"But nothing, you're beautiful. Now and always. Stop hiding." He traced his hand up along the curve of her hips and he felt her relax under his touch. Leaning into him, the length of her body pressed against his obvious need for her. His eyes settled on her breasts, they were bigger than he remembered. He cupped them in his hands, gently rubbing them with his thumb. Her lips parted and she let out a groan before her tongue rolled along her bottom lip, sending the pulse thundering in his neck.

Tess moved in rhythm with his hands, before stopping to urgently seek out his mouth with hers. She fumbled in her attempt to remove his shirt and ended up practically ripping it from his body. He looked up at her in surprise but she hardly noticed, she'd moved her hands to his trousers.

He knew this was a bad idea. He read about how some women get like this during pregnancy and he wasn't prepared to be someone she could use for a good time and then throw away again later. He knew he couldn't go through this again. Last time she'd discarded him the pain was too great, he'd shut down and just kept moving. It had been the only way.

He should stop her.

He needed to stop her.

"Argh." He groaned.

He wasn't capable of stopping her.

She had him tied up in her spell.

Captured.

Her hair smelled of apple and cherry blossoms as he ran it through his hands.

His body remembered her, it responded in a way it never had with anyone but her. Their bodies intertwined, every part touching, he became unsure where he ended and she began. If only he could freeze time right at this very moment.

Right before the inevitable heartbreak that would follow.

Tess pulled back from him, "Are we doing the right thing, Cole?"

No. His brain screamed.

"Promise me, tonight isn't all we have." He whispered to her.

She didn't answer right away. "Tess." He prompted. "Promise me."

"I can't." She whispered.

Right there at that moment, Cole felt the physical pain that comes from having one's heart ripped from their body and tap-danced over. Unable to speak, for fear of what words he may say, he slipped out from under the covers, collected his clothes and left the room and Tess behind.