Chapter 80

Chapter 80

“So, what was going on in there?” Jackson asks softly as we move through the quiet halls, glancing

over his shoulder as we go.

“Don’t you know?” I ask, frowning up at him.

He just looks at me blankly, not answering.

“Well, then why did you interrupt?” I ask, confused. Because it’s one thing if Jackson interrupted

because he knew that Alvez was going to be a creep, but quite another if he interrupted for…well, why

else would he have interrupted?

“I don’t trust that guy,” Jackson sighs, the words slipping between clenched teeth. “Something’s…off

about him.” He moves his eyes to me again, searching my face. “Was I wrong?” His words are tense.

I sigh, shaking my head. “No, you weren’t wrong, Jackson,” I say, looking forward as we climb into an

elevator and Jackson presses the brass button, closing he doors. “I was…very uncomfortable in there.”

–

Jackson grunts in a self–satisfied way, pleased I think to have his instincts confirmed. “I

don’t like the way he looks at you,” he says, quite soft. “I knew it was going to be trouble when he gave

me that note, asking you to come alone.”

“How did you know the note said to come alone?” I ask, looking up at him.

Jackson turns, instantly frowning down at me like the answer is obvious. “Because I read it.”

I burst out laughing, shaking my head at him. “Jackson, you can’t just read my mail.

“I was helping you!”

“That’s not an excuse!” but I’m smiling, and he smirks back at me, figuring out that I’m not actually mad.

Because he really did help me – I’d have been in a very tricky situation, I think, had Jackson not come

pounding on the door.

“Don’t let yourself be alone with him,” Jacksons murmurs as the elevator raises us up into

the air. “Bring Rafe or..or come get me. Or something.”

“All right.” I say softly, studying my mate’s profile as he pretends not to notice that I’m looking at him.

And inwardly, I wonder how the hell he’s justifying this whole hero act to himself.

Because, I mean, it’s pretty obvious to me that Jackson is protective of me because some part of him

knows, deep down, that I’m his mate or that I’m special to him, in some way. It’s happening, I think, on

almost a bodily level he’s driven to ensure my safety by the same biological mechanism that makes a

hen protect her chicks. But how…how the hell is he justifying it to himself?

—

He must know, my wolf says to me, sitting back on her haunches and turning her head curiously in

Jackson’s direction. He must have figured it out and he’s just…playing it cool.

But as I study him, I’m not so sure. Jackson – he’s smart, but in some ways he’s so outside of our

world, our culture. Would he be able to pick up on the little clues that Ben noticed, which might

communicate to others that I’m a girl?

Or, like Luca, would he even be willing to address his attraction to me, if he feels it? I’ve heard that

Northern communities are much, much less progressive with things like homosexuality and gender

fluidity. Even if Jackson did feel a stirring towards me, would he let himself go there, the way Luca was

so willing to?

I sigh as the doors open to the dormitory floor, shaking my head at my mate, wishing I could just…ask.

“What?” Jackson asks, stepping out of the elevator and turning his attention back to me. “Why are you

sighing? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” I murmur, shaking my head as I continue to look up at him, at the stark panes of his face. “I

just….wish I had you figured out.”

Jackson almost stumbles a step as we walk down the quiet hall

almost, though. He’s too graceful, really, to actually do that. “Me?” he says in disbelief, gesturing

towards himself. “You think I’m the mystery here?”

–

I smirk a bit, my eyes dancing, silently admitting that he’s right that I’m certainly the one keeping

secrets. “You’ve got them too, you know,” I say quietly as we reach the stairs at the

end of the hall and begin to climb them up to my floor. “Things you’re keeping back from

Jackson’s the one who sighs now, shaking his head. “I’ll gladly tell you everything you want to know –

every single thought in my head, Clark, for the secrets you’re keeping from me.”

Guilt builds in me as we make our way to my door. And

radiating from the entire hallway, from the silence bemehow, by the quietness

my own door, I know that I’m

the only one here that Jesse and Rafe are away, probably exercising. That Luca and Ben are likewise

off doing their own thing.

It would be so easy, to just…tug Jackson inside…

To tell him everything…

But even as my wolf howls at me to do it do it do it, I shake my head up at Jackson, knowing that it’s

still not right. Not yet.

Jackson sighs again, intuiting the direction of my thoughts, knowing that I’m still holding

on to my secrets.

And again, it’s not that I don’t want him to know. It’s just…as always, the timing. It’s not right. Not now

not when I’m still figuring things out with Luca, when we’ve got finals and the Examination looming,

when Jesse and Rafe still think I have one mate, even if they think it’s different people.

It’s just not right to blow up everyone’s world with this, not yet.

I stare up into my mate’s dark blue gaze, willing him to trust me, to just…give me more time. But he just

snaps his head away, frustrated.

“Jacks,” I murmur as he shifts his weight, taking a step away. I grab his hand, ignoring the pulse that

pounds through the hall when I do. He turns back to me, his jaw clenched in frustration. “I promise,” I

say quietly, shaking my head. “I promise that one day I’ll tell you everything, all right?”

“Why one day?” He exhales the words all in a rush, shaking his head at me, even as he moves closer.

“Why not now, Ari? What’s what’s holding you back?”

—

But I shake my head as I stare up at him, knowing that the reasons why I’m holding back are part of the

secret. “Can’t it be enough? The promise that I’m going to tell, as soon as I can?”

“Would it be enough for you?” he murmurs, stepping closer. Despite me, my eyes flicker half–shut as

his scent floods my nostrils, making something warm and hungry stir in my core. God, if I could just…

I dismiss the ridiculous impulse to beg him to give me his shirt so I could tuck it under my pillow,

breathing in that scent all night, and force myself back to full consciousness. To my surprise, he’s just

smirking at me.

“Goodbye, Clark,” he says, putting particular emphasis on the farewell that he usually omits. “Tell me

next time Alvez calls you alone. I’ll think something up.”

“Thank you, Jackson,” I say, tightening my hand, not letting him go just yet. “You saved met from…

some weird stuff back there.”

“Are you going to tell me about that, at least?” Jackson presses, shifting his weight back to me

curiously. “Like what did he do? Did he…”

But my answering smile just makes him groan and pull his hand from mine, because it’s very clear that

I’m not going to tell him a damn thing