Chapter 63 by Cara Anderson

Ch. 63 The Colton Situation

Mallory’s POV

“You can do this Mallory. All you have to do is be honest. And don’t cry! No matter what he says, don’t cry! He’ll only feel guilty and you’re the only one who gets to feel guilty in this scenario.” I talked myself up while wearing a path on Clay’s bedroom floor.

I could almost hear my wolf’s eyes rattling as they rolled back in her head. She found it utterly ridiculous that I would be so concerned about the feelings of a man who wasn’t our mate. From the moment she entered my life, the triplets were the only men who mattered in her mind and she refused to even acknowledge my feelings for Nathan.

That was all well and good for her. But part of me was still human, with human weaknesses and human emotions. And when I had to look in Nathan’s eyes and see the heartache and sorrow I caused him, I would have the same reaction any human with a conscience would have. A stifling sense of shame and regret. Not that I didn’t deserve it.

“Might as well get it over with. Guess I’m having a huge helping of hate with a side of bitterness for breakfast.” I mumbled under my breath.

I wandered through the packhouse, peeking in a few empty rooms until I finally found Nathan sitting in one of the sparsely decorated receiving rooms used to meet with dignitaries from other packs. He had his forearms resting on his thighs, looking at the floor while he twiddled his thumbs. He seemed deep in thought but he jumped to his feet as soon as I entered the room.

“Hi.” He greeted me with a half- hearted smile.

“Hi.” I returned shyly, stepping further into the room.

As I moved closer, I noticed his nostrils flare and his brow furrow. Despite the shower, he could still smell Cary on me and the knowledge made guilt flare hard and fast in my gut. I should have worn perfume or something. How thoughtless could I be?

“Nathan, I-”

“Mallory-”

We both spoke at once then chuckled at the uncomfortable silence that followed.

“You go first.” He prompted, waving for me to sit on the sofa next to him.

We sat facing one another and I couldn’t help but notice how tired he looked. Was that my fault too? Then again, why wouldn’t it be? It seemed no one was immune to the trouble that followed me like a black cloud.

“Um, I… “Fuck this was hard! I blew out a deep breath and tried again. “I’m so sorry Nathan. I know an apology isn’t good enough. You deserved so much better and I’ll never forgive myself for hurting you. But I need you to know that I truly am sorry.”

“Sorry for what exactly?” He asked, his expression totally blank aside from one raised brow.

“I, uh-, I thought-” I stuttered, tripping over my own tongue.

My jaw was on the floor as I watched him watch me flounder. Did he really want me to say the words? Wouldn’t hearing me say it out loud only make it worse? I opened my mouth again but no sound came out. Thankfully, Nathan took pity on me.

“Mallory, breathe.” He instructed, taking my hand in his and squeezing it reassuringly. “I’m sorry. That was mean.”

“No, it wasn’t. I deserved it.” I countered.

“Please stop with the guilt, Mal. You have nothing to be sorry for. I admit I would have liked to hear it from you first but not telling your boyfriend before accepting your fated mates is hardly a capital offense.” He said, letting me off the hook in typical Nathan fashion.

“You’re right. You deserved to hear it from me. I didn’t exactly plan it. It just kind of happened but that’s no excuse. I should have refused until I could talk to you first.”

Fuck! Was there anything more awkward than talking to your ex- boyfriend about the first time having sex with your new mates, even if not in so many words? I studied his face for a minute but he didn’t appear the least bit embarrassed. He looked sad, a little dejected maybe, but the devastation I expected to see was conspicuously absent.

“I don’t blame you for any of this. I think a part of me even expected it.” He answered my assessing gaze. “If I’m being entirely honest, I always held a part of myself back from you, Mal.

“Don’t get me wrong. I loved you, still do. But I always worried we weren’t fated and you’d walk away from me some day. It seemed like the best way to protect my heart at the time. But now I realize I’ll always have to wonder if maybe things would have turned out differently if I’d given you all of myself.

“If I’d loved you better, loved you with everything I had, maybe you still would have chosen me. Now I’ll never know.”

“Oh Nathan!” My voice cracked and the tears I’d barely managed to hold back now fell freely. “You loved me perfectly. I never felt like anything was missing between us.”

“Except a bond.” He offered, one corner of his mouth turned up for the briefest second.

“Except a bond.” I confirmed. “It’s not something I can explain in words and I know it doesn’t make any sense. Especially with the Colton situation.

“All I can say is, it’s like a part of me always knew they were mine, but I just couldn’t see it until the bond snapped in. And by that time, they’d hurt me so much, I didn’t want to see it. But in the

end, my heart and my wolf could never be whole without them.

“Sounds wonderful. Maybe someday I’ll find out for myself.” He mused. 2

“I hope you do. I want that for you Nathan.” I told him honestly.

“Wait, what did you mean by ‘the Colton situation’?” I assumed he knew but he looked genuinely perplexed.

I looked away, hating the crushing pain I knew he’d see if he looked in my eyes. I tuned out the small voice telling me how humiliating it was to admit I’d cheated on him with a man who turned around and dumped me. I deserved whatever mortification it cost me.

“Mallory?” He prompted, recalling my attention.

“He, um, he went back to Darcy.” I confessed the ugly truth to him.

Nathan’s angry roar shook the rafters. Hurried footsteps stomped in our direction, followed by two warriors rushing into the room. I waved them off with a shake of my head and though they both looked unconvinced, they slowly backed out the door.

“I’m going to fucking rip him to pieces. There won’t be enough of him left to identify the body.” His tone was more vicious than I ever thought him capable of.

“I thought you might be smug about it. Tell me I asked for it by trusting him.” My hushed voice sounded a little shameful, even to my ears.

“How could you ever believe that of me, Mal? I only want your happiness, even if it doesn’t include me.”

“I know.” I whispered. “I guess maybe I thought it would ease my guilt a little if you were mean to me. But you’re right. I do know you better than that.”

Nathan scooted closer to me, holding both of my hands in his and dipping his head to meet my eyes. I tried to school my emotions, hide the heartbreak I was sure he’d see. But it was no use. He could read me like an open book.

“Mallory, I want you to know that no matter what the future holds, whether I find my mate or not, whether things work out with one or all of yours, I will always be there for you. I will always care about you and I will always be here to help you, whether that means going to war for your pack or just offering a listening ear.”

His words brought a genuine smile to my face and I reached out to cup his cheek. He was such a sweet man and he deserved every happiness. I prayed the Moon Goddess would send him an amazing mate. One worthy of him and so much better than me.

“You’ll always hold a special place in my heart, Nathan. I hope we can still be friends, but I’ll understand if that’s not what you want.” It was hard to be vulnerable, knowing he could say he wanted nothing more to do with me but again, I would accept it if he did.

“You couldn’t get rid of me if you tried.” His bright smile was more than I could have hoped to see and settled my battered heart.

I threw myself into his waiting arms and he enveloped me in a tight hug. It felt like a new connection sprouted up between us, not a mate bond but a bond nonetheless, like we were always meant to be in each other’s lives. Just not the way we thought we were.

“Get you’re fucking hands off my mate!” Clay’s booming voice echoed through the room.

Startled by his outburst, I tried to wriggle out of Nathan’s arms but he only held me tighter, turning to snarl at my mate. Clay’s fists were balled at his sides and his face was a dark shade of puce.

“Insecure much?” Nathan taunted him. “Mallory and I are friends. We’ll always be friends. Friends hug. Get over it.”

“Nathan!” I scolded him, smacking him on the arm but he just snorted.

“Mine!” Clay met me in three long strides, pulling me away from Nathan and tucking me tightly into his side.

The way they were glaring at each other, I was surprised one or both of them hadn’t been burnt to ash yet. I pinned Cary with a look that begged for help but he just watched the scene unfold with unabashed amusement, his shoulders shaking with barely restrained laughter.

“Yes, I’m painfully aware that she’s yours now. I’m also aware that Colton is a fucking prick who doesn’t know his ass from a hole in the ground. What I want to know is what the two of you are going to do about it!” Nathan demanded.

“Trust me, it’s handled.” Clay snapped at him.

“What does that mean?” I asked warily, an ominous feeling creeping over me.

“Have you felt any more pain?” He questioned me, an unfeeling quality to his voice that set me on edge.

“No. Maybe they haven’t…” I stopped, unable to say the words.

“I doubt that. But it doesn’t matter. He’s no longer our brother and that means he’s no longer your mate.” He stated flatly.

“What?”