Chapter Twenty-Seven

For my readers who aren't good at visualizing (and I'm bad at describing) here is the scenery that I'm kinda working with

Kian

I watch Bridger's car disappear over a hill. Once it's out of sight, a wave of sadness hits me deep in the gut and I have to blink away tears. I stand there, at the edge of my territory, wishing I'd see his car again as if he'd turn around and come back. I don't see it for the first few minutes that pass by but I stay standing there until I feel a hand slip into mine. I flinch and looking beside me, relaxing when I see it's just Mika.

"It'll be okay!" Mika says, a smile spreading across his lips. "We should go explore."

I nod and I let him drag me away from the edge. Corzo explained that there are miles of land between my pack, his, and the other alpha who has adopted his land in this area. It's to ensure that packs don't overstep. He owns this entire place; he explained that it was passed down generationally and it grew and grew. I had asked him how he plans to expand if he keeps giving his land to other werewolves and he answered that his pack doesn't need expansion. He also explained some werewolf magic that I didn't understand. Maybe I'll ask him about it another day.

My land is very mountainous and I can't help but imagine how I'll use it as I start growing my pack. While Mika holds tightly to my hand, I use my free hand to point at places where other buildings can go but I don't want to make too many buildings – it'll take away from the natural beauty all around. We need to build a clinic that Dr. Edkart can run! And we can have a big eating place attached to the packhouse. What if more omegas come and they have mates and pups and want their own living place? There's so much I need to think about and plan. Maybe when my pack starts growing, I can talk to them about what they want and then build it.

But who will build it?

"Mika, I'm going to have to have everyone trained," I say, "you, Jenna, and Katie. Then when more omegas start coming, they'll be trained too."

"In fighting?" Mika asks, his nose scrunching up in disgust.

I shake my head. "No, in anything you want. But...maybe also a little fighting so we can all learn to protect ourselves. It's scary, but it's also a lot of fun, Mika."

I want omegas to have different jobs in this pack. We'll run like a normal pack with deltas, zetas, eta's – all of them. I can ask Corzo if his pack would be willing to train as omegas come in and in a few years, those omegas can train others. We can be completely independent!

I grab Mika's shoulders and shake him because I don't know what to do with all my excitement. His eyes go wide but he lets me do it, grabbing my arms to steady himself. I shake him and shake him, yelling as all the excitement builds up in me. I'm so excited I could jump off a cliff! But I won't, of course.

"Mika!" I yell, still shaking him. "Everything is going to be...perfect!"

He nods, slapping my arms to get me to stop shaking him. I do but I take off running when I let go.

"Kian!" Mika whines behind me. I look behind me and laugh when I see him pout, his body slumping before he starts to jog. He gains speed and before I know it, we're running like maniacs right beside each other. I just wish we could be running with each other in our fur.

Everything is just so pretty and green and...free. The woods are beautiful, don't get me wrong, but they're full of bad memories and it's just...crowded. The trees gave me comfort for a while. I can hide behind them and in them. I remember being a pup and standing with the front of my body against the big bark. I'd place my chin against the bark and look up at the branches expanding out and around the trunk, up towards the sky that's covered by leaves. When I was a pup, I always wished the tree would just soak me up and I could live in there as the tree – the way nymphs plant the seeds of their unborn and then I'd be reborn as something better. Something worth something.

But now, everything is open and there are no dense trees to soak me up. Mountains tower over me instead and lush, green grass and beautiful flowers welcome me. The sun shines on me and warms my skin. The ocean moves slowly, willing me to come to it and get lost in it instead. The land before me is mine and it tells me to free myself from everything; my stupid parents, that stupid pack, the pups that'll never be mine; all the pain, grief, anger, shame. Everything.

And I will. I'll keep letting things go as if I'm shedding a layer of skin like the screaming bugs in the summer. I used to collect their shed as a pup. But right now, I feel that if I let everything go then I'll be so light inside that I'll float away before I can get anything done.

Suddenly, I feel something.

It's like something in the deep part of my core...my soul.

I stop running. Mika doesn't notice and he keeps going. Some empty part of me suddenly doesn't feel so empty anymore; it's like a dead part of me that I forgot about suddenly pushed its way to the front of my mind and now it's alive. It's faint, not completely full either, but I feel it. l touch my stomach as the hairs on my body stand, my senses suddenly heightened.

The feeling is...familiar. Despite my nerves, a sense of ease washes over me. There's nothing wrong, it's good...whatever it is.

"You okay?!"

I look up. Mika is far ahead of me. He's turned to face me, hands on his hips as his shoulders raise up and down.

I give him a thumbs up as I start jogging to catch up.

Maybe the feeling was my body's way of physically releasing some negative energy.

---

Haily stares up at me as I coo down at her. I wiggle my finger over her cute little face. When my finger touches her cheek, her mouth opens and she turns her head slightly.

"No milk for you," I say, smiling as I pinch her cheeks. Her lips pucker and she scrunches her face, her nose wrinkling. I giggle at her reaction before lifting her up, balancing her little head with her shoulders.

"You two are adorable!"

I flinch when Vic appears, crashing onto the couch across from me. I give him a small smile as I bring Haily's face to mine and press a bunch of kisses against her soft skin. Her legs curl up to her stomach as I hold her out before bringing her back into me for more kisses. She's so cute and she's getting plumper by the day.

Jenna is making Mika lunch despite it being too late for lunch. It's okay because Mika should eat as much as he pleases. Now that we don't have to worry about rationing or going hungry, I've realized that omegas also eat a lot – just like normal werewolves, maybe a little less. Mika can eat five hamburgers if we let him and I can eat probably that much too if I wanted to – I don't.

"This might be personal," Vic says, "but do you have pups with Bridger as well? It's just...your scent is...."

That question makes me uncomfortable and upset. Why would he ask that if he knew it was personal? Even after Bridger asked me that question the day we crashed into his pack, he didn't press it after we refused to answer. He never asked me that again, either. So why would Vic ask me this? Plus, why would he assume we have pups together when neither of us made any clear indication that we did?

And how should I answer? Yes, but they're not his and they're not really mine.

"No," I decide, "I do not. My scent is just like that."

Letting go, letting go. I have to let everything go. For the longest time, I claimed the title of some type of parenthood after the birth of Avery. But I know she nor Ivory would ever see me as their father because I'm truly not. I just birthed them.

They aren't my pups.

I will start a new life and maybe I'll have my own pup in the future and I'll be able to kiss them and hold them forever. I'll watch them grow up in a pack with no fears. I might have a pup with Bridger. Bridger would make a great dad, I just know it.

But would I?

"Sorry if that was personal," Vic says, rubbing the back of his neck.

"It's..." I want to say it's okay. But Bridger told me to let him know if whatever he does isn't okay with me. He told me that not everything is okay and I shouldn't let things slide. If I want to run a pack, I can't let things slide.

"I don't like being...questioned like that," I say as I put Hailey back into my arm. I cradle her close to my chest as I glance over ar Vic who looks slightly embarrassed.

"I won't do that again then," he says, "so...what kind of questions can I ask you?"

Confrontation makes me very nervous, but if it goes as well as this then maybe I'll get better at not being so nervous. "I don't know, but I'll tell you if you overstep again."

Vic hums as he sits back, his embarrassment long gone. "Can I ask about you and Bridger? You are mates?"

I nod, my heart speeding up a little. "We are...we aren't mates, though."

"Interesting," Vic hums, leaning back against the chair. "I've never seen two wolves together that aren't mates, it's not unheard of though. Nothing wrong with it, I mean. Times are changing. It's refreshing, actually."

I nod in agreement. "Breaking traditions. Do you have a mate?"

Vic shakes his head, sighing so loud and heavy that he blows his golden hair towards the ceiling. It flops back down perfectly and I suddenly want to ask how he gets his hair to be so perfect. It's a golden-brown type of color and it looks thick and full. Nothing like my dry, curly hair that I don't know how to take care of. I try to tie it back as much as possible, but one time my hair tie got stuck in it and I freaked out for a long time as I tried to tug it out. It took a whole curl with it... Now I try to just hold it back with headbands and random pieces of thick string I find. Char's big hair tie has worked well...I forgot what she called it. A crunchie? Still, I've never been good at caring for myself, especially my hair. Then again, I was never given the opportunity to learn how. I see people walking around with bouncing, defined curls and wonder how they managed to do it so well.

"I'm 24 and still mateless," he complains, "it's crazy, but it is what it is. I might just be untraditional and become serious with someone who isn't my mate. You and Bridger are adorable together, though."

We continue talking as I watch Hailey slowly start to fall asleep. I ask Vic how he got into building houses and computer stuff. He tells me his whole life story about how his father got a human job as something called an IT director (I didn't want to seem dumb so I don't ask what that means). From there, he encouraged other wolves to go out and study "technology" and "information systems". While Vic was growing up, he was really into "tech-savvy" houses and he fell in love with "architecture" through video games he would play where he'd build houses or with legos. I remember legos from when I'd watch other kids play with them when I was a pup. I never understood why they were so fun. Anyway, he goes on to explain that he went to a human university to study civil engineering. He said so many different words I had never heard before, but I was able to make my best guess as to what they meant without interrupting his story.

"So architecture and engineering are building houses?"

"Uh...no," Vic laughs, "Engineering is a huge field full of different specialties. Civil Engineering -- what I studied -- focuses on building things that help the public like houses, libraries, bridges, and clinics. Architects focus solely on buildings. My university offered both majors, but I decided it'd be better if I pursued engineering."

He sounds so smart, I feel a little dumb asking him these questions that I feel like I should know.

"And werewolves...we don't have our own universities?"

Vic wiggles his hand back and forth. "Eh~ not really, no species does. It's just recent that The Elders have started promoting university education for werewolves. There is a place called The Academy or United Aegis -- it's called different things for different species. It was created by The Supernatural Board as a way to combine species, promote allyship, and stop wars – all that stuff. Did it succeed? No, but it's still up and running."

My eyes go wide. I never knew about this. "Who goes there?"

"Everyone. Meri, vampires, werewolves, even nymphs, fairies, and elves -- no humans, they're governments are too disastrous."

"But...they're all so...secluded."

I wonder if that's the right word or if I just embarrassed myself in front of Vic. But from the little lessons I've received from Bridger, I've learned a lot about other species. Elves don't even reside in this realm. Neither do Fairies and I can't imagine they go to the same school with their dark counterparts, pixies. It's all so interesting and I wish I could learn more about everyone, even the humans. Going to a school with them would be out of this world -- literally.

He nods with a shrug. "It's still pretty new. I was surprised when I found out about fairies, pixies, and elves – they've never been on good terms with each other and they're from completely different realms, so Goddess knows how The Board managed to convince them to send their young to that place. But yeah, it's a university just like humans. They can study niche stuff like Religions from different realms and species, Magical or Mystical Science, or broad stuff like Demonology, Humanity, Lycanthropy, Vampiricy – it's all really cool and all really new."

"How do you know so much about it?" I ask, on the edge of my seat now. I adjust Hailey so that I can hold her comfortably. Her little hand finds my shirt and she grips it tightly as she sleeps. Drool drips out of her slightly opened mouth but I don't mind it.

"Blue Palm has been harassed by The Board for a long time. My friend is the delta and she complains to me about the constant emails and brochures and pamphlets for the school. I've read them, and I've seen what they offer. It's all...too good to be true. I just– I know The Board has good intentions and they created this school with good faith, but I believe there are a lot of hush-hush issues that aren't allowed to leave the walls of The Academy. Can you imagine militant Meri, wrath-driven demons, and pixies all in the same room with werewolves, fae, and elves? Not to mention elves and werewolves are like cousins, I can smell the conflict from here but The Board makes it seem like everything is sunshine and rainbows over there."

I sit back on the couch and think about his words. Hailey shifts in my arms, sighing as she snuggles her face into my chest. Vic's concerns make sense. I don't know a lot, but I can see a lot of possible issues inside of United Aegis. Maybe a pixie offends a fairy or a meri offends a werewolf. How many of each species attend the school? Are they equal in numbers? What happens if there are like 50 werewolves and 51 meri? I really like the idea of everyone putting aside their differences and ending conflict, but that just doesn't seem like it could realistically happen and still maintain peace. I mean, apparently, werewolves are still technically in a war with the Meri because no one wanted to settle for a peace treaty. How can everyone get along in a confined space?

I have to learn more about this school.

"If you ever become a registered pack, The Board will harass you too," Vic continues, "they just can't take a hint."

I imagine, if I ever became a registered pack, that I wouldn't ignore The Board because I hate them, I'd ignore them for my pack's safety. I can't imagine sending an omega to a school full of species who probably look down on us. That's the opposite of my cause. Not to mention, it would be incredibly dangerous.

"Can you bring me the brochures and pamphlets?" I ask, "I just want to know more about it. It seems...interesting."

Vic smiles. "Of course, there's a website too. Do you know how to use a computer?"

I shake my head.

"I'll be happy to show you how."

---

I sit criss-crossed on my bed while holding my phone in front of me. I wait impatiently for Bridger to pick up, my face staring back at me as the phone rings. I fix my hair and adjust my shirt then I change positions to a lying position. That position makes me look bad so I sit back up and prop my back against some pillows.

'Why is he taking so long-'

The phone stops ringing and my face gets smaller as it moves to the corner of the screen. Bridger's handsome face appears on the bigger section of the screen. I can't control the smile that spreads on my face.

"Bridger!" I say, excitedly, "I miss you."

He smiles and I don't know how I can smile any bigger, but I manage.

"I miss you too," he says and I hate the way the stupid phone makes his voice sound different. I guess phones are only good for showing me cat videos.

"How was your drive back?" I ask, "I wanted to call or text you but I thought that might distract you."

He moves his camera around a lot. I want to love talking to him like this, but I don't. I want to be able to look at him in real-time and listen to his real voice. The camera makes everything look and sound off and I hate it. He told me that the phone is top-notch and has the best quality, but I can argue that no quality is better than real quality. I bet cats are even better in real life than on this stupid screen.

But I don't want to complain, so I don't say anything as he talks to me. I love talking to him, of course, but there's a little ache in the pit of my stomach that grows as I realize that this is the only way we'll be talking for a long time. It formed last night and I tried to ignore it but the phone's "high quality" is like watering a seed; it just makes the ache grow. I want to reach through the screen, but I can't.

Bridger explains that he went into the human city. That catches my attention because we didn't drive through any human cities when he brought me here. I want to see a human!

"How come I didn't get to see any humans?" I ask with a frown.

"We took a hidden route," Bridger explains, "it was to ensure we wouldn't get any unwanted attention."

"But you told me humans can't sense anything."

"They can't. But Hunters can, and pixies, demons...all of them. Hunters are humans. Your pack is crazy, maybe they employed the help of outsiders."

I frown. Why would they do that? I know that some demons can be evil because of their "drives", but why would my pack request the help of another species? Wouldn't they risk never getting us back? I try not to think too hard about it because if I think about them then I think about Peyton. And Goddess...I miss Peyton so much. I want him here with me, supporting me in this journey.

I shake my head. It's selfish, but I don't want to think about him right now.

He could be dead. Or being punished which is much worse than being dead.

"Oh," I hum, "well...I'm here now. They won't find us." I change the topic. "Have you told Alpha Arron about your plan?"

He shakes his head. "Not yet. I will during our next meeting. I'm going to talk with Shaye, Arron's delta, tomorrow."

"I can't wait to see you again," I say. "You won't ever visit?"

"Of course, I'll visit. I can't go a year straight without physically being around you. My visits just won't be frequent. I understand that some packs don't train their betas all their lives, but I was trained my entire life to be Arron's beta. It'll be hard to fit everything I learned into a little bit of training, but I'm confident Shaye will be amazing."

"And you will be an amazing trainer for her," I say, "you can train anyone and they'll be ready for anything."

Just like me. Our training lasted only a few months, but I feel like I can take on anything now. I feel positive now and I'm excited for the future – all the good things and the bad things. I'm excited to take all the knowledge I was denied, to fight and create a safe haven for omegas.

Bridger helped me find who I am. So Bridger will help Arron figure out what to do with him and he will help Shaye or whoever wants to be beta be the best beta.

Bridger is great at helping people.

---

Word Count: 3396

Hate this chapter, hope you like it

Because I write so far ahead, it's annoying to keep coming back to the boring parts TT