Chapter 17 - Astrid

A splash of cold water reminds me that this is all real. I am, in fact, in Midnight Shadow, with my supposed destined mate, after having had dinner with his mother. In all of my daydreams back home sitting in a classroom full of kids as they wiled away tunelessly on their clunky instruments, not once did I imagine myself here, at the home of the Lycans.

A cold gust of wind causes one of the wooden shutters to continuously bang close. One moment the trees sway wildly outside, then next, they pull back in formation. I walk over to them and for the first time look outside to see a garden down below with a bridge that leads to a separate residence; the tallest dome that I saw in the distance when I first arrived here. A light is on in the first floor and I crane to listen to low voices in conversation, when I realize Rio is among one of them. I quickly close all the shutters for privacy and for good measure.

The picture of the battery bar on my phone is green and full. I switch it on to a bombardment of texts from every member of my family, including my aunt Ellie. I look at the time, which is still set to Silver Bow, as 10:15 am. I video call mom.

He picks up immediately, relief flooding her eyes. I hear the hustle and bustle of the busy kitchen behind her, recognizing the store room she's in to take my video call.

"Astrid! Are you okay?"

"Yes, mom. I'm fine."

"Where are you?"

"In Midnight Shadow."

Her eyes turn on to a flash of gold.

"Did Alpha Xenakis kidnap you?" her voice comes out a mix of human and beast.

"No, he didn't mom."

"Is Bianca there with you?"

This intense line of questioning from my mom reminds me of the dinner with Corinthia Xenakis.

"No. That's why I'm here, mom. To find—"

"Come home now!"

I sigh.

"If you could just let me explain for a second."

"What's there to explain, Astrid? I slaved away for weeks in the kitchen to concoct the perfect menu for the gala night, which comes once a year. Alpha Xenakis may as well have spat in all our faces. He nearly ruined everything and Alpha Gilbert was very embarrassed."

I scoff. "So what? His daughter is missing and he's embarrassed about some stupid gala?"

"Bianca is missing?"

Right. As far as anyone in Silver Bow is concerned, she could have just run off to another state. Well, the cat's out of the bag now.

"Yes. That's why I'm here, dad. Rio has the immediate resources to find Bianca and bring her safely home." I try to sound convincing about the last part, but don't know if she would ever return home.

"So does Alpha Gilbert."

"Mom, you don't know everything. He's..."

"He's her dad, and I'm your mom, so you need to come home now."

"I'm not a child. I can make my own decisions."

"Astrid, adults don't make rash and impulsive decisions like the one you've made. You have to think things through."

"Even in an emergency?"

She clicks her tongue and sighs, exasperated.

"Just, please come home," she says in a calmer tone.

"I will...when I find Bianca."

She shakes her head.

"You're not her Beta, Astrid."

"Are you kidding me, mom? That's rich coming from an 'Omega."

"Don't you disrespect me. I have rightfully assimilated to the pack same as your father."

"Mom, you're missing the point. We're not wolves! At least, I have sense enough to know this and no, I am not here to look for Bianca because I have a sick dream of becoming her Beta or something."

"I meant," her tone is serious now, "that you are not responsible for Bianca."

"She's my best friend. Of course, I am."

"I wish your father was here to talk some sense into you. But he's currently with Alpha Gilbert, who is extremely furious, by the way. You kids may as well have started a war."

"Oh, please," I scoff, shaking my head in disbelief. "I can't believe he's more concerned about saving face than searching for his daughter."

"Well, he will know now that you've told me. We'll get Bianca home soon, so you need to come home too."

"Mom, even if I were to come home, I will never be a part of the pecking order."

"Fine, then you can go live with your aunt Ellie. Is that what you want? If space is what you want, you're free to move to New York. Anything but where you are right now, across the ocean in a foreign land."

"And what's the difference that I'm here in Mesaniskia?"

"Oh, Goddess. Did you just say it like the Lycans do?"

I shake my head. So, that's my dad's problem. The Lycans. Funny, that used to be my problem too just a few days ago.

"Mom, I'll call you back. I can't handle this right now."

"Astrid, don't you—"

I cut the video call.

Well, that was just about as horrible as I expected it to go. I dismiss all the text messages, not really in the right headspace to read them all when I'm supposed to be getting ready for a 'late night family run'.

I hover a finger to call my sister, An, but instead throw the phone onto the far corner of the bed and crash into a pillow. My eyes droop heavily as my mind begins to wander. I think about dad and mom. I think about An and her book shop. I think about Bianca, hoping she's safe. I think about Rio, his aqua eye, and his black eye, and I drift off to sleep.

I emerge on the other side, light rays beaming into my eyes, blinding my vision. I hear a woman's voice echoing all around me, calling my name. She tells me to find the white wolf.

I am. I will.

She hums to herself, a tune unfamiliar yet almost recognizable.

What is that?

She says it's the song that runs through my blood and the blood of my ancestors. She says that I must—

"Miss Astrid."

I get yanked out of my dream by Nicole's shrill voice as she stands ominously by the doorway.

"I have here, some requested items from Alpha Xenakis." She enters the room with a cart full of clothing, towels and other amenities and begins placing them into the empty closet. "This will only take a minute."

"Sure, go ahead."

I sit up in bed trying to remember the tune I heard in my dream. It was slightly adagio, a slow tune, melancholic and blue, although all around me was bright yellow. I hum it out loud to see if I remember it correctly when Nicole finishes up and bows to leave.

"Thank you, Nicole." I call after her, but she's already gone.

I reluctantly look for my phone to check the time, mentally converting it to 8:56 pm. Wonder how late this 'late night' run is going to be.

The built-in closet fills the entirety of the wall adjacent to the bathroom from floor to ceiling. I open it up to reveal several shelves and empty hangers. At least there are no more ridiculous dresses for the time being, but one black bodysuit hangs. It looks like a diving suit. Under the soft light of the table lamp, it shimmers. Does Rio expect me to go on a dive tomorrow or something?

I stretch the fabric, and to my surprise, the stretched parts slowly fade out until I hazily notice the golden marbling on the floor and my bare feet. I stretch it even more, and the hazy filter disappears, turning the fabric completely transparent. I release it and it snaps back to its original form, no longer transparent. This is not for diving, this is for shifting. I change into the jumpsuit.

21 years of stripping from my clothes or ripping through shirts and jeans, when I could have been wearing something like this. It only reminds me how the Lycans selfishly guard their resources.

I know I will only rip through any clothes I wear on top of this body suit, but it would be weird to walk around like this. So, I throw on a t-shirt and shorts, then step out of my room to snoop around this great big manor.

The hallway is now lit up in warm yellows. Further to my left is a turn towards a corner where I can hear faint murmurs. I venture out towards my right, back in the direction of the foyer.

At the bridge connecting the two corridors, for a moment, I almost satisfy my curiosity of what lies further to the east wing, but a cool gust of wind blows on my face as if to tell me not to enter. I descend the stairs instead. Two double doors lay before me, both quite tall and both probably containing equal amounts of intrigue behind them. The door to the west turns out to be nothing more than a grand hall, perhaps used for entertaining guests. The door to the east, however, opens with a bit of resistance, sucking in the air that enters along with me like the room has been standing still for quite some time.

I turn on the light to reveal an archival room of sorts, with book shelves, glass showcases and medieval weapons lined up against one side and paintings on the other. There is a desk and a chair sitting in between the shelves that looks slightly dusty.

On the other side, classical paintings hang on every inch of wall estate depicting portraits of various men and women, presumably the Xenakis' family line. Lots of the men have thick, burly beards and the characteristic eyebrows that Rio and his siblings share. Whereas the women are striking beauties with wolfish blue eyes, and curly hair. I stop on the most beautiful one of them all: a woman with pin-straight black hair, warm brown eyes and a smile that reminds me of Rio. "Agatha Xenakis" reads the name at the bottom.

The tune I had heard in my dream comes to mind as I automatically hum it when I look at Agatha Xenakis's brown eyes. Something in my spirit stirs and wells up in my eyes.

I hear a shuffle coming from the doorway and I immediately stop humming.

"Don't stop on my account," Rio says, his head poking through the open doors. Admittedly, my heart skips a little beat, but I quickly remind myself that I am not too pleased at Alpha Smug and the Lycans right now, despite the amount of history before me piquing my fascination.

He walks over to me, dressed plainly in a muscle top and shorts, no bodysuit underneath.

"That was my grandmother," he remarks about the painting in front of me. "Did you know she was an Omega?"

So tolerant within their own community, yet so secretive to the outside world.

"Why aren't you wearing the suit?" I ask.

"Because I have no need for it," he states. "We are not ashamed of shifting in and out of our wolf forms completely naked. I just thought you would feel more comfortable with the suit on."

"This would have been very useful growing up ripping through all my favorite t-shirts," I grumble.

"They're not the easiest things to make, Astrid. I had specially requested our mages to make you one. You won't find another like it in all of Mesaniskia."

"But your mages knew exactly what to do, right?"

"Well, yes. They are quite powerful."

"So, they know what to do, but they won't share their knowledge with the rest of the packs?"

"Astrid, it's not like that. The Moon Goddess chose us to bear the responsibility of leading the wolves. And in doing so, blessed us with mages, who could give us what we need."

"What you need?" I sigh and begin to pace the room. "What about all this knowledge? All these books and artefacts?"

"These are our sacred texts filled with years of history that no wolf alive today has witnessed. So, of course, we guard these too."

"Or maybe you're hiding something. You know, any account of written history is always biased towards the conquerors. Maybe there's something within these texts that you don't want the wolves to see."

Rio shakes his head and laughs.

"Do you think so lowly of us?" he asks.

"Actually, I kind of do."

"Hmm," he places his hand under his chin, scrutinizing me with his mismatched eyes. "And is there anything I can do to sway you otherwise?"

I shrug. "My sister's writing a book on the Lycan War of 1886. Maybe you can lend her a couple of books. That would be a start."

"Done. I'll have some shipped first thing in the morning."

"Really?"

"Why not? You are my destined and my world now revolves around all your whims and fancies."

I feel the heat rising between my ears and flaring up my nostrils. The look of victory on his face as if he's won me over in any way, annoys me to all hell, but I relent in my annoyance because at least somebody's getting something out of this. An will be getting some new books and I can just imagine the look of pure joy on her face.

But every now and then, sometimes prods me to point out the things I've always loathed about Lycans. And I get the sinking sensation that perhaps I am doing so to remind myself not to fall in love with this place. Not to fall in love with him.

To make things even more absurd, we are about to go frolic under the moonlight as if there aren't more pressing matters to attend to.

I sigh and leave the room.

"Let's just get this thing over with."