47. PLEASE MOVE ON

5 MONTHS LATER

PLACE : EUREKA, NEVADA

-"Coming Mrs. Jandy! Just one minute!" I shouted and washed my hands immediately. I went out and found her standing out holding a basket. I took it from her and she came inside. I put that basket in kitchen.

"Come have a seat."

-"Sure." She sat on couch and I also sat besides her.

-"Thank you Zoya. You know dada is now eating medicines without any drama." She said holding my hand.

-"Really? It's a very good news." I said.

-"All thanks to your brownies. He liked them very much."

-"Really? Then I'll make more and you know he also......." I immediately stopped speaking.

-"He? Your husband?" She asked and I nodded looking down.

-"He also liked my brownies a lot. He used to say that my brownies tastes just like his mom's." I smiled remembering that moment.

I felt her touching my cheek. I looked at her.

-"Your tears. You're crying again." She said and I realized that tears escaped from my eyes. I wiped my tears.

-"Zoya. For how long you will keep crying for a man who didn't even trusted you and told you to leave. That man is unworthy of your tears."

-"It's not like that Mrs. Jandy. He was not the only one at mistake......."

-"Please Zoya. Don't defend him. Don't be so blind because of love that you're not able to see what he did."

-"MOM!"

-"Coming Chen! I'm going now Zoya, okay? Now wipe your tears and smile. And dada was calling you so come when you have time. Bye. Take care." With this she left and I closed the door of my small house. It's not that much small, it's enough for me alone.

This is where I lives.

This is living room.

It's kitchen.

And this is bedroom.

I came very far from there. Very far from everyone. This is a remote area and this house belongs to Mrs. Jandy where I lives on rent. She is a widow who lives in neighbouring house with her father in law whom she calls dada, she has two children a 13 years old son Chen and 16 years old daughter Lia. She is a very nice lady, and she works in an high school as a teacher nearby. She also helped me in getting job and me being an BBA graduate got accepted easily.

My life here is very simple. I goes to school in morning with Mrs. Jandy, then we comes back home around 2 or 3 pm. Then I does house chores and then night. In night, I teaches biology and chemistry to Lia. After spending time there I comes to my home and sleeps. This is my new lifestyle.

Now, I don't have to go to office or college, I don't have to listen to silly talks of Jay, I don't have to fight with Rehan Bhai for ice cream, I don't have to prove that I loves my both brothers equally, I don't have to call Mummy & Papa and Mom and Dad daily. I used to have two mother and two father, two big brother, one small brother, two idiot friends in college and one most idiot and annoying friend, two bodyguard who were always around me, a secretary who used to help me in work. I had a lot of fairies in fairy land. I had a man in my life, whom I loved more than myself, whom I trusted the most, who was my life, who was my hapiness, who was my everything,who was my husband.

Now I have noone. But I have respect. Here everything is true. Here people respects me. That I didn't get there. Those people were liars. Who didn't even wanted my existence, who hated me, who called me with names and always disrespected me. My husband, for whom I did everything but he called me a sl*t, who doubted my character, who told me to sign on divorce papers and leave, who slapped me.

I felt warm liquid on my cheeks. I sat on ground hugging my knees and cried. That's the only thing I'm doing everytime  when I'm alone since five months. The more I tries to forget about that day, the more it cames in front of my eyes. Even when I want to, I can't forget him. Because no matter if he hates me, I still loves him and always will. I cried more and my head started paining again. This pain is increasing day by day and it's paining a lot since last week. I don't know why it's happening.

I got up wiping my tears and went out to Mrs. Jandy's house. I'll ask her if she have any headache medicine.

-"Mrs. Jandy. You're going somewhere?" I asked.

-"Yeah. I'm taking Chen to doctor."

-"Oh. I was asking you if you have some medicine for headache."

-"Then come with us Sis." He said.

-"Yes Zoya. You also come with us."

-"Okay. Two minutes." I said and went inside to take my coat and scarf. I locked the house and went to them.

-"Zoya. Can you please drive the car?" She asked.

-"Sure." Then we three left.

NEXT DAY

My head is paining so much again. I just woke up and don't know what's happening to me. I've taken medicine also but this pain is not going. It's going to be 8 am and Mrs. Jandy would've been coming to call me. We've to go to school. I am almost ready I'm just eating apple now.

*Knock knock*

She came? I went to door and opened it while speaking

-"Mrs. Jandy my head is paining again that..........." I lost my words after looking at the person in front of me. Apple fell from my hand.

What he has done to himself? His hairs and beard are messy and longer than usual, his face is looking dull, he's having dark circles and his deep blue eyes are staring in mine brown ones. He's looking empty and tears formed in my eyes looking at his condition.

-"Jaan." He whispered and I came back to reality. I looked away

-"What're you doing here?" I asked while adding bitterness in my voice.

-"Jaan. I came to take you back home. Come." He hold my hand and turned to walk. I removed his hand from mine.

-"This is my home and I'm not going anywhere." I declared and tried to close the door. But he pushed the door and came inside. He held both of my arms.

-"Jaan. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry for whatever I did. I'm ready to do anything for getting your apology. I will do whatever you want but please come back home. Please Jaan." I removed his hands and moved away from him.

-"Why are you apologising Mr. Khan? And specially to a sl*t like me?"

-"Jaan! Don't use that word ever again for yourself?!" He said raising his voice.

-"Why?! When you can call me that then why can't I accept my truth?"

-"That is not your truth."

-"That is. I am a sl*t because I slept with a man other than my husband. I got pregnant and........"

-"No! Please don't say this."

-"But that is truth. It's truth that I killed my baby......"

-"That can never happen because you never did that. You never let any other man touch you that way."

-"How can you say this? You forgot that me and Jay...."

-"Jaan. I know that was not truth. I was wrong."

-"No. How can Mr. Faisal Khan ever be wrong?"

-"Jaan. Why're you speaking like this? I'm telling you that I'm guilty for whatever I did. I said wrong words to you, I doubted your character and said bad words. But please forgive me. Please."

-"Okay. I forgave you."

-"Really? Then let's go back home." He said smiling and hold my hand. He started walking to door but I stopped removing his hand.

-"Which home you're talking about? I'm already at my home. I don't need to go anywhere else."

-"Jaan? This is not your home. I'm talking about our home, in Massachusetts." He said looking at me confused.

-"OUR HOME? That is your home, not mine. I am not your wife anymore Mr. Khan. I am not Mrs. Zoya Faisal Khan anymore. I became Zoya Abbas again the day I signed divorce papers."

-"I don't care about that f*cking papers. I only knows that you're my wife. You're my Jaan. You're mine." He said cupping my face. I removed his hands.

-"I'm not yours anymore. Everything that was between us ended the day you slapped me."

-"That was the biggest sin I'd done and I'm ready for every punishment."

-"Really? You'll do anything?"

-"Yes."

-"Then leave me. Then leave me and go back."

-"I can't leave you. You're mine Jaan. I will never ever leave you. I promised that I'll be with you always."

-"Oh! You're saying like you've always kept your promise, when you haven't kept a single one. You have never ever kept your promise. You promised that you'll never let me feel sad, you'll always protect me and will tell me everything about your past. But you never told me anything. You promised that you'll always be the same, you'll always trust me, but you also broke that promise. You promised that you'll never drink alcohol again but you did, several times."

-"I know but you also promised me that you'll never ever leave me, but you did."

-"No. You're wrong because I didn't broke my promise. I promised that I will never ever leave you, but if you yourself ask me to leave, I will leave and never come back again. And what you said in return, that even if you'll die you won't say that because I'm your wife, your Jaan, your everything. But what I became that day when you simply told me to sign divorce papers and leave?!" He just kept looking down. I went near him and pushed him, he moved back.

"Tell me! Why're you silent now?!" I yelled.

-"Because everything was against you. You can yourself think once from my point of view. I came back after almost three years, then I got to know that you has became CEO and you and Jay loves each other. I was jealous and angry as well. And then Lucifer and Rehan........" He sighed and continues "I believed that but deep down my heart I trusted you. That day when we kissed and you told me that you loves me, I decided to trust you completely but then I got that abortion reports that too on your name."

-"Faisal tell me one thing honestly. Will you?" I asked.

-"Yes. Ask?"

-"God forbid but if that accident would have taken away your life, then what you would have wanted? You'd have been happy watching me crying alone? Or you'd have wanted me to move on?"

-"I'd have wanted you to move on and.... and start a new life, with other...... other man who would have loved you." He said with so much difficulty like he's forcing his words.

-"Right. But you know what Faisal? Even when there was no hope for you to be alive, still I didn't moved on. I never ever thought of living with someone else. No other man can touch me that way. Because I am yours, only yours." I said and started crying. "How can.... how can you think that...... I will..... I will sleep with someone else." I cried while looking down.

-"Jaan....." He tried to hold my arm but I moved back. "I'm sorry Jaan. Please come back I can't live without you. Because you're my happiness, you're my Jaan, my wife, my everything."

-"No Faisal. I'm not your wife anymore. I'm not even your happiness. I'm not the one for you, I don't deserves you. Forget me and start a new life." I said hold his hand and walked towards door. I pushed him out of house. "Go back." I said and closed the door.

-"I LOVE YOU JAAN! I'LL NEVER EVER LEAVE YOU! I'LL NOT GO ANYWHERE!" He yelled.

I fell on floor leaning against the door.

-"I'm sorry Faisal." I whispered and cried bitterly.

NIGHT

Now it's 9 pm and it is raining heavily. I immediately ran to window and looked out. He's still sitting outside in rain. God!

I opened the door and asked

-"What are you still doing here?"

-"Waiting for you."

-"Faisal. Go. There's no need to wait for me because I'm not coming. Now go."

-"No. I will not go, I'll wait for you." He said stubbornly, he's fully drenched.

-"Faisal. You're fully drenched, you catches cold easily and it's dangerous to sit out like this. It's not your city, here wild animals wanders in night. If you want to wait then go and sit in your car."

-"No. I will not go anywhere." He said shivering.

-"Fine. Keep sitting here. I don't care." I said and closed the door.

Oh God! What I should do now? He's really stubborn. I can't see him like this.

*Boom*

A loud sound of clouds echoed along with lightening. I immediately opened the door. He isn't here.

-"Faisal. Faisal." I called but he didn't answered. My heartbeat increased because of fear. I went out and looked around. "Faisal! Faisal where are you?! Faisal!" I shouted and walked towards road but a hand stopped me. I turned and found him. I got relieved seeing him. "You scared me idiot? Where were you?" I asked hitting his chest.

-"Was worried for me?" He asked smiling. I immediately removed his hand from mine and took two steps back.

-"Why I'll be worried? I don't cares about you."

-"Then why you came out searching for me in this heavy rain?"

-"Because.... because I didn't wanted some of your friends coming here and file complain against me for leaving you out in rain." I told him the very first lie my brain made.

-"Really?"

*achoo*

He sneezed. I hold his hand and went in house closing door behind.

-"Sit here." I told him to sit on couch and he did as I said. I went in my room and took out two towels. I came back with towels and hand one to him, with one I dried his hairs. He is shivering in cold, I'm myself feeling so much cold by just going out for two minutes and he was out since one hour. "I'm just coming okay?" I said and went in bedroom. I firstly changed my clothes and wore a hoodie and trousers. I searched in cupboard but I didn't found anything that can fit him.

"God! What was the need for him to be this much big? Now what should I do? Think Zoya. Think...... Idea?" I smiled and went out. I found him sitting on couch while shivering. My heart is sinking looking at his condition.

"Faisal. I'm just going to Mrs. Jandy's house. I'll come in two minutes."

-"Who Jandy?"

-"She's neighbor. Two minutes okay?" I said and took an umbrella.

-"I'm also coming....." He was going to stand.

-"No need to! Sit here silently!" I ordered and he sat back. I went to her house and came back with a sweatshirt and trousers. These are her brother's clothes, who lives here but now he's working in California. I came back to my house and found him standing shirtless hanging one towel in his neck.

-"Even after shivering in cold, you're here showing off your muscles." I mocked him.

-"But I was feeling more cold in wet clothes and I had to dry my body. What wrong I did?" He said innocently.

-"Fine. Wear these." I said handing him clothes. He looked at them like he's looking at a bomb.

-"We're not diffusing a bomb here. Just go there in room and wear them."

-"Fine." He said and removed towel from his neck. A thing caught my attention. It's a deep big scar on his stomach near his abs. He was walking towards room.

-"Stop." I said and he turned. "What's that scar on your stomach?" I asked and he hided it behind clothes.

-"Which scar?"

-"Don't try to lie." I said walking to him.

-"It's just a small scratch from accident." He said and it's obvious that he's lying. I took clothes from his hands and looked at it carefully.

-"It's not a scratch and it's not new either. It's looking like it's very very old, like from your childhood....... Wait." I looked at his face and asked. "Don't tell me that it is because of that Fiona and her son." I asked with so much hatred for them.

-"It is." He said and went in room.

-"Those monsters!" I exclaimed and threw the cushion of couch on floor in anger. I started wandering in living room. "That witch. And that dirty David. How dare they hurt my Faisal? How merciless they wee to hurt a small child. God swear, I'll make them pay for whatever they did. I've learned gun firing, that time I shoot your leg, but this time I'll shoot your head......."

-"Jaan?" I turned and found him standing on room's door. I hope he didn't heard anything.

-"You changed, give me your clothes." I said and took his drenched clothes from his hands and also took his shirt, coat and towels from couch. I put clothes in a basket where I keeps clothes for laundry. I came back and found him sitting on couch. I think he hadn't heard anything, and this sounds of rain is also too much.

I went in kitchen and made coffee for him. I put the cup on tray. I think four brownies were left. I searched in fridge and found them. I heated the brownies and put them in a plate on tray. I took tray and put it in front of him on table. I again went in kitchen and made noodles. I myself hadn't eaten anything since morning because of him. I served noodles in two plates and went to him. He was sitting quietly, he hasn't even touched anything.

-"You wanted cold coffee?" I asked and he looked at me confused.

-"What?"

-"I mean, you're not drinking coffee it'll become cold. And these brownies are also for you why're you not eating?"

-"Since five months, I'm eating alone. So I was waiting for you." He said sadly.

-"But you used to live alone before I came and we were together for less than a year."

-"But in those months I got used to your presence in my life. No matter how less time we've spent together, but you became the most important part of my life without my knowing. And when you went away from me, I realised that how much addicted I've become for you. I missed your care, your worry, your scoldings, your innocence, your cuteness, I missed you. Without you I became lifeless."

A lone tear escaped my eyes. I put tray on table and immediately wiped my tears.

-"I was living and eating alone for three years." I said and sat on couch.

-"Jaan I'm......"

-"Faisal. Eat something, you've not eaten anything in afternoon also and then you were drenching in rain. Please drink this coffee and eat something then I'll give you medicines." I said and hand him cup of coffee. He started drinking coffee. I sighed in relief. Thank God! That he didn't refused to eat. Otherwise I would have......

-"Otherwise you would have forcefully made me eat food. Right?" He said while eating noodles. I looked away and started eating mine food.

After eating, I cleaned the table and gave him medicine. I washed the dishes and cleaned the kitchen counter. I turned and found him standing on kitchen's door. He is looking at me.

-"What're you doing here? Go and take rest." I said and closed all curtains of windows of living room. I found him standing st distance, he was still looking at me with so much emotions in his eyes. I looked down and went in room. I took one blanket and moved to living room.

"You can sleep in room. I'll sleep here on couch. Go." I said and turned to go but he held my hand. "Faisal. Please don't be stubborn. I told you that I am not the one for you. Please leave my hand and let me go. Please move on." I said trying best to not cry. I didn't heard his response. I turned and found him looking down while holding my hand. "Leave me Faisal."

-"Jaan." He said in shaky voice. He looked up and his face shattered my heart into millions of pieces. He's crying. Bhai told me that he has never cried, but today.....

-"Faisal." I whispers and he sat on his knees.

-"Please don't leave me Jaan. I love you so much and I can't live without you, I'll die. I've never ever felt this much weak and alone since my mom dad died. You're very important to me. You're my everything Jaan, you're only one whom I can call as family. I've never begged to anyone ever but, I'm begging you. I beg you Jaan please come back in my life. Please. Please don't leave me Jaan I'll die. I beg you. Don't leave me. Please." He begged and started crying so hard leaving my hand looking down. I can't control my tears now. I sat beside him while crying. I cupped his face and he looked at me with teary eyes. I wiped his tears and he closed his eyes leaning to my touch. More tears fell from my eyes.

-"Don't cry." I whispers and he looked at me holding tears in his eyes.

-"I love you Jaan." He said and I hugged him. I started crying bitterly and found his hold tightening around me. He caresses my head and I cried closing my eyes.

After sometimes, I broke hug and looked at his face. I cupped his cheek and wiped his tears.

-"You'll not cry. I'll never let you cry, I promise. Your tears are shattering my soul Faisal. Don't cry. It should be the first and last time you've cried."

-"You'll not leave me right?" He asked holding my hands.

-"No. I'll never leave you. But you've to promise me that you'll never beg to anyone. You know how silly it'll sound? The Faisal Khan, America's richest was begging from his wife. What will people think of me?" I said teasing him.

-"I don't care about others. I only cares about us. You're the only one from whom I can beg, only you can scold me, beat me, call me idiot, stupid or anything. Only you can kiss me." He said smirking.

-"Kiss? How it came here?" I said confused.

-"I said kiss? Then it means that I should kiss you."

-"What? Faisal......" Before I said anything he pulled me closer and started kissing me. I smiled and put my hands around his neck closing my eyes. After sometimes he broke the kiss.

-"Now I understood that I was missing your lips more than you." He said mischievously. I hit his chest and he smiled.

-"I love you." I said and he looked at me confused.

-"What you said?"

-"Nothing." I said and tried to get up but he pulled me more closer.

-"Answer me."

-"I love you." I said and he smiles.

-"Say again."

-"I love you."

-"Once more."

-"I love you."

-"One more time."

-"I love you. I love you. I love you."

-"Once more."

-"I LOVE YOU MR. FAISAL KHAN!" I shouted.

-"I still can't believe it."

-"Then you should believe it. Because I really love you my idiot, arrogant, grumpy husband." I said smiling.

-"I love you too Jaan."