Is John a likeable character?

John

Our Alpha returned.

She returned.

...

Everyone's spirits have lifted. Everyone's working and training their best.

...

They all have motivation driving them...

What do I have to motivate me...

What do I have to protect...

What do I have anything to lose...?

"Back 'ere again..."

"What do you want now, Mixen?", I was too tired to be annoyed with him.

"Heh,", he more than coughed out, "I'm just 'ere."

We were once again at my special spot. I didn't bother turning my head to him, I just continued staring at the open field. The open field at the very end of the forest, yet still untouched by humans.

"Go away.", I whispered.

"What? Hard to hear ye.", he lied, staring at the open grass with me.

"Go away.", my voice trembled.

"John..."

"Go away...!", I buried my head in my arms, pulling up my knees and holding tight. That's all I could ever do nowadays: hold on tight.

I sobbed and sobbed to myself. Mixen allowed me to with no interruptions. I continued to cry onto my wet arms, no longer caring about how I looked, how pathetic, nor how vulnerable I was at that very moment. I cried all bottled up emotions, all the frustration, all the hatred. This should've made me feel better, but it didn't. After crying it all out, I just felt empty. Hollow.

"Damn it,", I looked up and wiped at my eyes, "Is being hollow all I could go back to?", I asked to no one but myself.

"No.", Mixen said with an ancient husk to it.

I jolted in surprise, his silence made him fade from my mind.

"Heheh,", he laughed out sadly, "John, believe it er not ye still've sumthin' to fight fer..."

I narrowed my eyes at him. He continued.

"I know there is to be a war a'comin...I know it is a war that took yer parents...and I know that ye stayed optimistic by lookin' ferward to yer mate in the future...someone that'll love ye forever more..."

He turned to me, who had fresh tears making their way down the wet road of my cheeks.

"But believe it or not, there's still sumthin' to fight fer."

"Like what?", I asked, desperate.

"After all that hardship, where did ye return to? What people where there fer ye? Who continued to feed ye?"

"...random people...", I answered confused.

"Heheh,", he laughed out huskily again, "random people? What are these "random people" that continued to care fer ya?"

"...the pack membe-"

"The pack! Yes!", he cheered out pointedly, "the pack! And what did Lavender say the pack is? What did she say the pack is in that speech of 'ers?"

I wasn't following what he was saying. I just narrowed my eyes at him in confusion.

"We fight fer everyone in the pack,", he quoted from the Alpha, "isn't that...family?"

My eyes widened.

Family...

Family...!

"Ye always had family, John."

My mind flashed back to our greatest healer in the pack, William, who fixed up a room in the cabin for me to stay in. A room I've stayed in ever since.

Then to Jason, Claude, Daisy, Amminen, and other members of the pack that brought me stuff to eat while I was still 7 until I could get myself a job to feed myself. Though even then, I'd occasionally get some treats from some and at the fall, pumpkin pies from Axel's parents.

Axel.

He gave me hope without knowing it. He gave me something to do, a sense of righteousness when I protected him. The littlest, and I mean littlest, of chats with him overwhelmed me to no end. He made me feel like a normal wolf, even if it was just for awhile.

Axel. My first love.

I did horrible things, I admit with regret, but even so he forgave me nonetheless. And not just me.

My friends.

They were always there for me, through thick and thin. Indeed they distanced themselves from me months after finding their own mates.

But they had reason. The whole pack did.

A lone wolf who refuses to accept his fate. Not looks of empty pity nor disappointment, but of worry. They never gave up on me, I did.

I gave up on them.

I gave up on everyone.

I gave up on my family.

When all they did was care for me.

But why? How'd this happen?

Then I remembered.

Because I'm a lone wolf.

"There is more to life than true love."

I didn't know whether that too was a flashback, and looked up to Mixen for proof. He did speak.

"Ye wolves spend yer whole life revolvin' 'round the mating bonds ye've grown obsessed,", he whispered, "hypnotized,", he continued on, voice growing quieter, "blind."

My mind was empty, all I could focus on was the wise bear's words.

"All to someone ye don't even know yet. Ye wait in the dark tunnel until the exit is opened, until ye see the light. No longer walking to it, but waiting."

He turned to look at me, "I was once like ye, John, but a certain wolf...", he chuckled softly, "a certain someone, opened my eyes and asked these exact words: Is that really love?"

I didn't speak, and allowed him to continue as he looked back to the grass.

"She tried to spread 'er insight on the topic, but failed. She was laughed at, shunned, expelled from even 'er own pack. Unwanted cuz she dared tried to open our eyes and let us walk and decide fer ourselves. We blind folk refused 'er cure."

I looked back to the wide space before us. Everything was so clear now. I no longer felt hollow, but filled with understanding.

"How have ye come across this place?", Mixen asked.

"I just found it.", I answered incompletely.

"Found it how?"

"Found it...when...when I was troubled...after the death of my parents."

"Hmph."

I looked down at the grass between my feet, and a thought came to me.

"How did you find me here? Were you lying about having dead senses?"

He chuckled, "Think ye discovered 'ere, huh? Heheh."

I looked at him confused, once again, for what felt like the hundredth time today.

His beady, bear eyes looked at me from the corner and back at the scene before us.

"Like ye...when troubled...she came 'ere..."

"Is she the same lady you've been talking about?"

He chuckled sadly, "A lady...to me she was a goddess!", my eyes widened in surprise. To creatures like us, religion was nothing to joke about.

"I'm not the only one who thought the same. To others she was an angel, their savior, a role model, a miracle..."

Mixen paused for a moment, "And to 'erself, she was somewhat those things...she wanted, no, needed to stop our unhealthy obsession with one thing in life. But honestly, if ye think about it, we are  a creature that can switch from 2 species! Without the mating bonds to blind us, we could easily rule this planet."

I was shocked. He was right. In all our existence, how have we not done it yet?

"She realized this too, yet she risked it. Humanity has overcome many obstacles, becoming more accepting over the years. Maybe they could accept us this time..."

I looked back down on my feet, and played with the grass. Our kind, mostly the wolves, were seen as a threat to humanity. Our type had to rely on our human bodies to survive in the world.

"I miss 'er...", Mixen confessed with woe.

After all I just heard and what he confessed just now, only one name came to mind.

"Violet."

Then gears began turning and I realized that's how he found out where I went all the time. Violet went here when she was troubled too.

"Ye finally got it, huh?"

He turned his large head to face me, "Ye look like ye cried a storm! Bahaha...", he turned his head back, "Y'know, weirdest thing! I never thought I'd miss cryin'..."

"You can't cry?", I ask bewildered.

"Not as a bear...not anymore..."

"Oh."

He smiled and got up. He was a very large bear. He opened his mouth and lowered his mouth to me. I morphed into a wolf on reflex, but was too intimidated to do anymore. He got ahold of the scruff of my neck and began walking.

"W-wha?! Lemme down! I'm not a pup!!"

He dropped me and I fell hard on the earth.

"Thought I'd lift yer spirits! Was I too literal? BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

He continued laughing and I later on chuckled along, actually missing this side of him for the first time.

"Thanks, Mixen."

He immediately stopped and looked at me in shock, "Heheh, yer welcome...John."

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sooo...here's a fresh chapter...was it okay???? I was just planning to make it a light conversation but then gears turned in mah head and yeeaah it went on as deeper shit.......

.......

ANYWHO!!! I'd like to thank everyone for the votes and comments!! Seriously y'all are amazing!! This story was all in my head and only I knew about it and now like 19k read for this?! Flies my kite so high and hard, I'm using chains instead of string for my kite! Keep up the comments! I love reading yer comments! Though I'd wish y'all would comment more throughout the chapter, and if ya feel like yer commenting too much, BAHAHAHAHA YER FIINE!! Also bad comments, I know I'm not that good of a writer, so if there's something ya dislike, thought was weird, want me to get my shitty facts right, COMMENT :D!! I love my fellow lemon sponges!!

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