Chapter 8 - Sam

Sam was kicking himself. He should have grabbed a little container of syrup instead of pouring it onto Mik’s pancakes. He should have known better than to assume how much syrup Mik would have liked.

‘You never do anything right.’

His father’s words accused him vehemently as Sam hurried back to the kitchen, his head down and eyes stinging.

He thought the pancakes would be a nice surprise and he still managed to screw up.

Why couldn’t he ever do anything right?

The dining area was mostly empty now with just a few stragglers milling about. The cooks were cleaning up and getting ready for a break before getting to work on lunch.

“Back already, Sam?” greeted Marla, one of the cooks as she wiped crumbs from the countertop.

Sam set Mik’s plate on the clean side of the counter. Guilt pressed down on his head and shoulders. “I’m sorry but... are there any pancakes left?”

“Might be. Check the fridge.” She eyed the plate. “Syrup got away with ya?”

Sam nodded and silently dragged his feet across the kitchen to the fridge. He found a few pancakes on a plate covered in saran wrap, crammed between other wrapped leftovers, and pulled it out. They weren’t cold yet, but he took them over to the microwave to warm them up and grab the syrup. He found a little to-go sauce container and poured some maple syrup in it.

Returning to the infirmary, Mik grumbled along with his stomach; a sour mood that not even maple syrup could sweeten.

“Let’s try this again,” Sam said as he returned to his mate’s bedside and cut a few pieces of the pancakes. “How much syrup would you like?”

“None.”

Sam’s brows furrowed as he studied Mik’s face, looking straight ahead. “None?”

“I don’t like sweet things.”

The rough edge of his voice scraped against Sam’s nape. He lowered his gaze to the pancakes before him. He could smell the syrupy sweetness smothering his own, now soggy and cold.

“Why’s that?” he dared to ask as he lifted a piece of pancake to Mik’s lips.

Mik’s attention was still on the wall at the other side of the room, but he opened his mouth and accepted the food. He chewed and swallowed in silence. Sam waited for him to say something and when nothing came, he sighed and turned back to the pancakes for another piece.

When he turned back with a piece of pancake, Mik said, “Sweet things are messy.”

Sam’s brows furrowed again as Mik accepted the piece and closed his eyes as he chewed.

He dropped the subject and silently fed Mik, watching the muscles in his face as he chewed. The slight pull of his brows every now and then, as if deep in thought. Mik kept his eyes closed, allowing Sam to gaze at him as much as he pleased without feeling embarrassed for staring. He couldn’t help the way the matebond lured him toward this male. It urged him to brush his fingers across those golden brows when they furrowed, to stroke the coarse hairs of his beard, and trail over his lips. He’d never looked at anyone this way before—male or female—and all he wanted to do was take care of him.

When Mik had enough, he thanked him and asked for something to drink.

When Sam had finished tending to his mate’s needs, he took his breakfast to his own bed and sat down and ate his cold, soggy pancakes in silence. When he was almost done, Mik spoke.

“When is your alpha coming?”

Sam paused and hung his head. “I don’t know.”

“Go and find out when you’re done.”

Sam’s eyes stung as a lump formed in his throat. “Why? Why are you always asking for Alpha and never for me?”

“Look at me!” Mik snarled. “How would you like to be strapped to a fucking bed? I’m uncomfortable, my body hurts, and I’m sick and tired of being completely dependent on you for the simplest things like eating and drinking! I hate this!”

Sam could understand his frustration. He’d hate being tied down to a bed too. “That’s what happens when you snarl at others who are only trying to help you. Even with only one good arm and leg, you could hurt someone and we can’t have that.”

Mik growled. His discontent rumbled for a minute before he grumbled, “I’ll be good.”

Sam wanted to believe him but if Mik wasn’t his mate, he too would have had his doubts.

“I promise.”

Catching Mik’s eyes, Sam’s stomach somersaulted.

“I swear to the Goddess that I’ll be good.”

Words like that were not to be taken lightly. Wolves didn’t swear oaths to Her if they did not intend to fulfill them.

Looking back down at his half-eaten breakfast, his appetite left him and anxiety crept back in. “Okay. I’ll go find Alpha.”

“Finish eating first.”

Sam shook his head. “I’m done.”

Dropping their dishes off at the kitchen, Sam set out to Alpha and Luna’s house a hundred yards away. After knocking on the door, his stomach bunching into tighter knots, Alpha answered. The creak of the hinge scraped against his spine, drawing a whine to slip from his throat.

“Sam? Is everything alright?” Concern etched across Alpha’s face as he pulled the door open wider. His nostrils flared for a second, taking in Sam’s scent, before relaxing.

“Yeah.” Sam rubbed his arms as if he was cold even though it was proving to be another hot day.

“Bullshit.” Alpha looked around and beckoned him inside. “Come in. We’ll discuss everything inside.”

Swallowing, Sam nodded and followed him into the house.

It opened up into the living room, where Luna Aki was resting on the couch with a book in hand and a bucket under her head. She looked over as Alpha closed the door and gave Sam a weak smile. “Sam! I’m so happy to see you.”

Sam paused in his tracks and stared at her. Her usually warm-toned skin was pasty and pale. Dark, heavy bags hung under her eyes and her cheeks looked shallower than the last time he saw her.

For a brief, fleeting moment, Sam forgot about the anxiety gnawing in his gut and hurried to her side. On his knees before her, he stared at her in horror at what she had become. The luster and sheen of her hair was limp and dull. She looked near death if not for the fire still burning behind her dark brown eyes.

She chuckled weakly at him and patted his cheek. “Oh Sam, I’ll be okay in a few weeks. I’ve been through this three times before, though it is proving to be harder on me this time in my older age.”

“Can I get you anything?”

She let out a laugh, sounding more like herself. “I’m fine, Sam. Alpha is taking good care of me. Even Animkii is proving to be a dutiful young male and getting me everything I need.”

“And you’re bringing out the best in him.” Alpha stepped up behind the couch and bent down to kiss her forehead.

“Who are we talking about, dear? Sam or Anim?”

Alpha smirked. “Both.”

She smiled back, satisfied with that answer before turning back to Sam. “So what brings you here, my sweet? How are things with your mate? Alpha tells me he’s a troublesome brute.”

Heat rushed up Sam’s neck to his cheeks and the knots he’d forgotten about in his stomach returned, twisting tighter together. He hung his head as he wrung his hands in his lap. “My mate... He asked to be released from the bed. Swore to the Goddess that he’d be good.”

Tension settled in thick. A potent musk seeped from Alpha’s pores as he straightened up. Hands clenched the back of the couch’s frame. “Did he?”

Sam nodded his head.

“Let me make myself perfectly clear. I don’t trust him.”

Sam flinched and curled into himself. Alpha’s harsh tone scared him. He’d only ever heard his soft, comforting, and supportive tone. While he knew Alpha was right, he was terrified of letting him down and terrified of losing his mate.

“But,” he continued with a pause, “he is your mate. And wolves can change.”

Sam raised his head. Hope jumped into his throat as he dared to look at his Alpha’s face.

With knotted brows, Alpha swallowed and added, “Under the right circumstances and with the right individuals, wolves can change for the better.”

But will I be enough? Sam was too afraid to ask, choosing instead to hope that Alpha’s words were true.

“He will have to be isolated until he can be trusted to walk freely among the pack. Understood?”

Sam nodded his head vigorously.

“I can’t have a threat wandering about freely. If he lunges at anyone, he’s done. If he comes after my position, I will take him out. If he builds an army against me, I will finish him and everyone who follows him.” Alpha Noodin met Sam’s eyes and held them. “He is your responsibility. Understood?”

Sam nodded his head before lowering it and bending his neck in submission. “Thank you, Alpha.”

“I will release him from his binds and he will stay in the infirmary until I have prepared a guest house. If he can prove to be a decent wolf during this time, then you can both move in there and continue his healing journey. If he misbehaves during this time, then he’s getting tied down again and his stay in the infirmary lengthened until he can prove to be a decent wolf and mate to you.”

Nodding in agreement, Sam thanked his alpha again and they left.

Anxiety continued to gnaw away within him as they approached the infirmary and walked in.

Alpha repeated everything he had told Sam to Mikwam. Mik was silent until the end, his eyes lowered in submission, and uttered a “Yes, Alpha,” before the chains and straps that bound him were removed. He groaned in relief when he could move all but his broken arm and leg freely.

Alpha left while Mik’s catheter was removed and his vitals were taken.

When they were alone again, Sam asked him, “Do you feel better now?”

“Yes,” Mik answered, “but I need a shower.”

Sam found a wheelchair and got tips from the nurse on how to shower him with the casts on. With renewed hope and his spirits high, Sam helped Mik into the chair and wheeled him out of the back room and into the infirmary’s lone shower stall. A chair was stationed in the stall and Sam helped Mik to sit on it, blushing when the hospital gown was removed.

Mik wanted to shower himself, but with only one good arm, he grudgingly gave in and let Sam handle the nozzle on a hose while he rubbed soap on his body.

Sam’s face was beet-red and he tried not to stare, but it was hard not to admire the ripples of muscle that ran throughout his mate’s body and the tattoos that lined his arms and shoulders. He could tell Mik was uncomfortable with Sam helping him, but he gritted his teeth and said nothing.

They worked quickly and Sam helped him up as he attempted to dry himself, only to get frustrated and let Sam finish up.

Sam couldn’t shake off the heat that resided in his neck and face. He never thought he’d be attracted to the male form but his mate was indeed very attractive in that regard.

But it seemed his mate didn’t appreciate his appraising gazes and his throat voiced his disgruntlement numerous times. Mik didn’t make a move to stop Sam or tell him off. It was an involuntary reflex that jabbed Sam’s heart, but Sam held onto hope that Mik would come to accept him eventually.

After getting his mate into a clean hospital gown and back in his bed, Mik suggested Sam go and take a shower too.

He avoided meeting Sam’s eyes when he said this and Sam tried to sniff himself but didn’t think he smelled too offensive.

Still, he relented to his mate’s request. “Okay but don’t go anywhere without me.”

“What would you have me do with one good arm and leg?” Mik quipped, still avoiding Sam’s gaze.

“True.” Sam rose to his feet. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

He didn’t want to leave his mate’s side, but Mik always did seem calmer and more receptive to him after he’d taken a shower. If something as simple as smelling clean could make his mate even a smidge happier, he’d gladly do it.