Sasha: Chapter 56

I peeled my eyes open, blinking against the light coming from the windows. A cool draft touched my shoulder and a shiver ran through me.

Summer in Siberia sucked.

I needed it hot and humid. Not fucking cool.

At the sound of paper crinkling, I froze and slowly turned my head around. Tatiana sat on the window seat, shoving a piece of chewing gum into her mouth and a kindle on her lap.

Her hair shone like spun gold. It was only now that I realized her blonde hair was slightly darker, more golden, than her brothers’.

“What are you doing here?” It had been over twenty-four hours since I talked to another human being.

Tatiana shrugged. “I picked the lock.” My eyebrows shot up, impressed she knew how to do that. “I figured you wanted company.”

“Thanks,” I murmured, shifting into a sitting position. Our eyes locked and I swore, she was watching me with a hint of judgment in her eyes. An uneasy tension was suffocating and I waited for her to say something, but she remained quiet.

“What?” I snapped, tired of this fucked up situation. My ass burned. My head hurt. But most of all, my heart hurt.

“Do you love him?” Her question was calm, but vehemence vibrated in her voice. God, these Nikolaevs would be the death of me. For the short time in the pool, I really enjoyed them but then shit went to hell.

“He kidnapped me,” I answered instead, but my expression must have told her what she needed to know.

She sighed and muttered, “So stubborn. No wonder he fell for you.”

“He fell for me?” The words slipped and it was too late to retract them.

She rolled her eyes. “He’s not in the habit of just kidnapping women,” she muttered. “In fact, you’re the first one.”

I narrowed my eyes. “What about Wynter?”

She waved her hand, like she was shooing a fly. “No, he helped Wynter,” she answered, confirming her brother’s words. “She didn’t want to go back to her uncle until she was ready.”

She produced another wrapper from somewhere. “Want gum?”

“I just woke up,” I told her, pushing my hands through my hair. “Why are you here anyhow?”

She rolled her eyes. “Aurora and Isabella are talking babies. I love babies as much as the next person, but there is only so much baby talk I can handle.” She smiled. “Besides, I want to help my brother. I fucked up when I brought up your sister.”

“You said something he should have told me a long time ago,” I grumbled.

“Seven years, huh?” she questioned, studying me. When I gave her a confused look, she clarified, “You two have known each other for seven years and he never said a word to anyone about you.”

I shrugged. “Maybe I wasn’t worth mentioning.”

She grinned, that smile reminding me so much of her brother. “Sasha always says things that are not worth mentioning. The things that he should say, or someone he should mention, he never brings up.”

I hesitated, the logic making absolutely no sense.

She rolled her eyes, then smiled innocently. “I didn’t say it makes sense,” she retorted dryly. “That’s just how Sasha operates.”

“Where is he anyhow?”

“He and Alexei snuck out in the middle of the night,” she stated, then made air quotations. “Something important.” I stared at her, while her eyes shone with amusement. “Probably to kill someone.”

God, it was only… my eyes flickered to the clock… nine in the morning and my head was starting to hurt already.

She slipped off the windowsill and came to sit on the edge of the bed. “So you love him,” she declared.

Seeing my confused expression, she just chuckled. It was way too early for this. And on an empty stomach. There should be a rule about heavy topics before you brush your teeth, at least.

“Tatiana, it’s a bit early for this,” I said dryly. “Unless you’re willing to give me a phone so I can call my brother, I’d rather just be alone.”

For some reason, my tone amused her. She flopped herself next to me on the pillows, like she readied for a long discussion.

“God, these sheets smell like sex.”

I was fucking mortified. The Nikolaev family should get a tattoo that read ‘certifiably crazy’ so everyone could steer clear. She stared at the ceiling, as if she was thinking.

“Did you know that my mother killed herself?” My eyes darted her way in surprise. She held my gaze and I shook my head. I didn’t know much about Sasha. He always asked questions about me, but rarely talked about himself. “Yep, she was batshit crazy. She caused Alexei to grow up imprisoned and tortured, slipped date rape drugs to my father so he’d sleep with her. Guess who’s the product of that union?” I blinked. “Yep, you got it. Moi.”

Okay, maybe their family was a bit fucked up like mine.

“I’m sorry,” I murmured softly, putting my hand over hers.

She shrugged. “Honestly, I didn’t witness any of it since my brothers are so much older. I was spared.” She turned her head my way, her blue eyes reminding me of the clear Mediterranean sky. “Sasha not so much.”

“What do you mean?” I whispered, feeling like I was invading something I shouldn’t.

“He should tell you his story,” she remarked. “I only know what the surveillance showed. She was going to jump with me and kill us both. I was barely a few weeks old. Sasha convinced her to give me to him and then she jumped.”

“In front of him?” I croaked, trying to picture a little boy seeing his mother kill herself.

She nodded. “I’m not a shrink, but there is something about him and trying to save women from killing themselves.”

A tense, pensive silence permeated the air and both of us returned our attention to the ceiling. Ghosts lurked. Revelations danced.

“My sister committed suicide,” I finally said. “I was too young for the meaning of it to register.” Plus I just endured two years of my father and his games so it was hard to grieve her properly. “My mother tried too, but I was just a baby then so I don’t remember.”

She nodded in understanding. She could really relate.

“Talk to Sasha,” she suggested softly. “I think he feels responsible for your sister’s death.”

My stomach tightened. A burn stung the back of my eyes.

Without warning, she jumped off the bed and sauntered to the door. She stepped into the hallway and glanced over her shoulder to look at me.

“If you love him, no matter what he has done, you’ll fight for him.”

She left the door open as she disappeared from my sight.