Chapter 6

"So you're part of the student council? Really?"

My mum sounds super excited. She's beaming at me, touching my hair and giving me extra servings of freshly made pancakes.

I nod through a mouth full of my favorite chocolate chip pancakes, the ones that are basically soaked in hot chocolate sauce and incredibly hard to swallow. I still manage.

"Yeah, kind of. The event council is like a sub group. Kaia made me join."

"Oh Kaia," my mum sighs dreamily, "She's a great girl. I'm glad she made you do this, it's such an important step in your life. Think how good it will look on your résumé!"

I reach out for another pancake "It's not like we only joined the club for our résumés."

Even though it totally is for me. But my mum doesn't need to know that.

"Of course, of course," my mum says and packs a bag with sandwiches and fruits and another one with pancakes, "Still, think about your future! Everyone will be so impressed – being part of the student council basically means you're perfect for a leadership position."

"That sounds really great mum," I say quickly and snatch the bags from her hands, "I won't miss to mention it, promise. Now excuse me, Kaia is waiting."

"Have fun," my mum says and brushes back my hair, "And feel free to bring any of your new friends from the council home, I'd love to meet them. Also, what about Logan? Why isn't he coming by anymore, I miss him!"

I swallow. Right, my mum doesn't know. There's actually a lot she doesn't know, since I never really told her I'm dating Logan in the first place. To her, we were nothing but good friends, though I'm not sure she never suspected anything.

"Uh," I say and slip in my shoes, "Yeah. Bye, mum."

My mum gives me a look but doesn't ask any more questions. She standing on the threshold, watching me as I start the car, and I wave over my shoulder.

Kaia is waiting for me in front of her house, dressed in an adorable duffle coat, arms full of folders and hair extra bouncy.

"I did some research!" she tells me while climbing in the passenger's seat, cinnamon curls flying everywhere and cheeks bright red, "Everyone in the council is so into the project, I couldn't just sit over the schedule and nothing else."

"Research for a cleaning event?" I retreat and raise an eyebrow, handing her the bag with pancakes, "Do you really think this is necessary?" I pause and start thinking, "Wait, are you maybe trying to impress someone?"

Kaia puffs her cheek and starts digging in the bag. "What do you mean – of course I want people to like me!"

"Everyone likes you," I say.

Kaia is beaming. "You think so?"

She's incredibly happy, as if the fact she's a natural sweetheart everyone adores is completely new to her. Her excitement is a little contagious, so I join in on her plans to spice up the green & gold cleaning as I stop my car on the parking lot and reach out to change my shoes. Kaia's hands are everywhere as she tells me about this cleaning tips she did research on, but suddenly stops in mid-sentence, eyes growing wide.

"Just –"

"Just what?"

"Uh, let's just go," Kaia says quickly, shoving folders in my arms and holding onto my wrist, "Come on, June."

"What?" I repeat, brows furrowing.

"Come on, June," she pleads.

Kaia's grip on my wrist is tight as she drags me over the parking lot, but it's too late anyway. There, right next to a shiny silver Mercedes, is Logan – with his arms wrapped around Vivian, so close it's hard to tell which arm belongs to whom. Vivian turns her head right when we pass, and there's a second, where I just stand and stare and they kiss. It's like a perfectly synchronized performance, with their noses brushing and their eyes closed. Some freshmen pass them with flustered faces and coo about how cute and adorable they are.

"What a perfect couple," someone says dreamily behind me.

I feel like throwing up. Again. Apparently, in combination with Vivian the effect Logan has on me only doubles.

"Don't look, June," Kaia whispers, vehemently dragging me in the other direction, "What are they even doing, in front of everyone. Ew."

It's not the fact they show their undying love or what not in front of everyone that hurts me, though. It's that I can't help but agree with the other students. They look so good together. The perfect couple, completely in love with each other. If this was movie, it'd be totally about poor Vivian and Logan trying to find their way together, while evil still-girlfriend June tries to prevent it at all costs. This is the moment where people have tears in their eyes, relieved about how perfectly it worked out for them. And oh yes, everyone will be laughing at me, the ex-girlfriend, watching them with a frozen face.

Somehow we end up in front of our lockers, Kaia still cursing over Logan and Vivian while stuffing all her folders over one another.

"– and then he even has the audacity to do this in the middle of the parking lot, like he knows you'll be there."

"Everyone is in the parking lot at some point."

Kaia shakes her head and is still all riled up. "You better stand there tomorrow with your own boyfriend, June! What about the council guys, they're cute. Just ask one if he'll go out with you and then –"

"Kaia," I tug on one of her curls, "It's ok, really. Logan is an asshole, but he can do whatever he wants. I really don't care."

It's a blunt lie and Kaia knows it just too well.

"If it wasn't for you, I'd go and punch Logan right in the face," she says.

"You know you don't punch people. Can you even make a fist?"

"For you, I'll do it," Kaia declares, "I can't believe I actually considered him my friend at one point."

"You consider everyone your friend."

"Yeah, but," Kaia sighs, "I was just so happy you finally found another friend. And then even a boyfriend! Why did it have to end like this?"

I don't know what to say. I know Kaia's worried about me and it was hard to miss just how relieved she was when I introduced Logan to her. A friend I made all by myself. Not like I'm trying to be antisocial on purpose. It's just that I really, really don't like meeting or talking to new people. There's always this awkwardness, the 'I don't know what to say' and 'what do they think of me' feeling and I'd rather avoid that. Maybe I really am antisocial.

I hide it well when I'm with Kaia though, ever since she managed to lure me out of my Netflix and stay at home shell during freshman year and adopted me to be her best friend. Now my life includes watching Netflix together, but also going out and doing things out of my comfort zone, like joining the event council.

"June," someone nudges my side.

I need a few seconds to remember that yes, this is my English class, I'm present and I'm holding the right book in my hands.

"June," the voice sounds a little impatient.

I turn my head and there's Carlos smiling at me, who is apparently also in my English class. Oh.

"Hi Carlos," I whisper and wave with my pen.

"We didn't have time to catch up during the meeting," Carlos says and saves the whispering, because our teacher isn't paying attention anyway, "But I was actually really surprised you showed up. I never thought you liked these kinds of things."

I wonder about several things, from what we're supposed to catch up on, to what he thinks I like. Instead I say: "Well, I'm really good at organizing."

Carlos laughs.

"Cool. So, what did you do last time?"

"After you left? Nothing really," I say, "Liling sweet-talked Mrs. Bergmann and she agreed on our plans for the green & gold cleaning. I mean, your plans –"

"Our plans," Carlos says.

"Yes, our plans," I can't help but smile, "Also, Matthew and Agatha continued working on the flyers and the slogan. Matthew suggested some more funny things with, uh, dust."

"I can't say I'm surprised," Carlos says, "Everyone's already hyped for our Christmas event, but I think Matty lives for the green & gold cleaning."

"That's cute," I say, "Also – what Christmas event?"

"Well, the Christmas prom obviously," Carlos laughs and starts doodling something on my notebook, "It's the first year we're organizing it all by ourselves. Usually, the student council is all over it, guess the disaster last year made them change their mind."

The Christmas prom is one of the two annual proms at my high school, two weeks before Christmas break. Kaia gave it her all but didn't manage to drag me along last year, but apparently I didn't miss too much, since it really was one big disaster. The ticket prices were way too high, because the student council thought ordering fancy catering and a band that actually charted on the Billboard once was a good idea.

In the end, the lead singer of said band called in sick ten minutes before the prom was supposed to start, and the catering's mashed potatoes left half of the student body with heavy diarrhea. Kaia called me the morning after with a voice close to die. I fed her crackers and water and promised to stop her from ever eating mashed potatoes again. And this year, it's apparently the event council's responsibility to not repeat this disaster.

"No stress," Carlos says, reading my expression well, "There's no reason to worry. Johnny already made a plan – we'll organize a cake sell so the ticket prices will be more affordable. Then, no more dubious caterings and health check on the band. Nothing should go wrong after that."

I stare at the doodles he left on my notebook, several stick figures hugging each other and apparently moving to the music a stick figure band creates in the background.

"This is nice," I say and point at it, "Why aren't you part of the arts team?"

"Johnny somehow got a look on my last midterm report," Carlos shrugs, "I mean, my grades in math and science are good, and that led him to believe I'm great with everything technical – and I really am, so it's not much of a problem. But it was basically just Johnny admitting he doesn't trust Duncan with it all by himself, and who would blame him on that."

I seriously start to regret the fact I've never bothered to become friends with Carlos, besides some chatting here and there. This, talking to him about any and everything, is really nice. And easy.

The bell ringing makes me realize I didn't pay attention to a single thing in class, even though English's my favorite. Huh. That's definitely a first.

"Hey June," Carlos asks as I quickly reach for my things, "Are you going to eat lunch with us?"

"Who's us?" I ask dumbly.

"The club," Carlos grins at me, "We're always meeting up for lunch at the cafeteria. Where do you usually eat?"

"Uh, depends," I say slowly, because sitting with Kaia in the back corner of the green & gold room, some of Kaia's friends and or Logan randomly joining, doesn't sound too exciting, "Is everyone in the council close?"

"I think so?" Carlos says, "I mean, there are some fights, but we spend a lot of time together. It's nice."

Carlos reaches for my hand to pull me along, and I flinch and take a step back. He doesn't comment on it, just guides me through the cafeteria until we reach the table with all the other council members. I spot Logan and Vivian at the very end, which means I'm lucky for once. Logan still goes so far as to raise his hand and wave. I act like I can't see him.

Instead, I focus on Kaia, who's beaming sandwiched between Johnny and Duncan.

"June! I'm so glad you're here," she calls out, as if she was worried without her company, she'd catch me eating lunch in the bathroom. Not too far off by the way.

"Hey guys," Matthew smiles and points at the free seats by his side.

I wave awkwardly and try to waste some time, but find myself soon enough in the middle of Matthew and Carlos. Our elbows are pressed together, and Matthew's hair tickles my cheek as he turns his head. Which is just great. My awkwardness is reaching a whole new level.

Liling sits across us, together with Agatha. She's wearing a black turtleneck dress and a blue blazer, looking all extraordinary and classy once again.

"Oh, did you guys come together?" she asks curiously.

Carlos nods and takes a sip from her vitamin water. "Yep."

Liling furrows her brows, trying to take the bottle back, but before she's able to reply Logan beats her to it. He's peaking at us from behind Vivian, and the look on his face isn't exactly friendly.

"I never knew you two were friends."

Vivian looks at him like she's smelled something bad, but she doesn't say anything.

"Why though," Carlos laughs and nudges my side, "June and I were in same English and math class for two years, of course we're friends."

"Sure," I say and try my hardest to prevent myself from blushing furiously because two years? I had no idea.

Logan snorts and focuses back on Vivian. They whisper amongst themselves, looking all secretive and important, and then Logan reaches out and brushes Vivian's cheek with the back of his hand. They proceed staring at each other adoringly. Duncan makes matching gagging noises on the other side of the table and Kaia raises her eyebrows until they're almost vanishing in her curls.

I'm tempted to throw my food at them, but can't bring myself to do it, because pancakes. Instead, I focus on Agatha. She's sitting right next to Liling, her short hair braided in an adorable crown around her head, black rimmed glasses sitting on her nose and instead of her lunch, she's focused on a heavy book. I'm a little worried Agatha's maybe also in one of my classes. Since she's working with Matthew, she's most probably a senior just like us.

Agatha notices me staring and smiles. "Hi June."

I smile back while my brain is working hard. Does her face ring a bell? Big no. Is it possible she's still in one of my classes and I simply can't remember? Big yes.

"Why so stiff," Liling laughs and wraps a hand around Agatha's shoulders "Don't let the shy act fool you, Agatha's really good with people. She helps me with secretary work a lot," Liling pauses to start unwrapping what looks like a five-star meal camouflaged as school lunch, "But then she showed us her drawings and everyone was stunned. She's super talented – but only a sophomore! Can you believe it?"

I can't, not with the mature way Agatha carries herself. Still, I'm extremely relieved since that's a pretty legit reason why I don't know her.

"Agatha is the baby of our group," Matthew adds and grins at her, "Though no one believes that when she's next to the junior pack."

"Pretty bold for a guy spending most of his free time in stockings," Duncan says, "Doesn't really scream mature to me."

Matthew's ears color visibly. "I told you, those are part of my soccer kit."

"You play soccer?" I ask curiously and immediately regret it, as Matthew focuses his whole attention on me, "In, uh, a club?"

"Yeah," Matthew says slowly, "I'm on the school team. But, um", his ears color visibly, "I'm not a starting player or anything. Just for fun, you know."

"This attitude is the reason you'll never be a starting player," Logan says, "I was always sure I'll be the best skateboarder in the US, and now look at me."

"I don't know, man," Duncan says, "I'd still rather do soccer for fun than whatever you're doing with your skateboard."

"Hey, what's wrong with skateboarding?"

"Um I don't know, maybe the fact it isn't cool anymore since – the nineties?" Carlos says.

"My younger brother did skateboarding once, but stopped," Liling says, "Now he only ever uses his waveboard from time to time. Do you have a waveboard, Logan?"

"No, I don't," Logan says, "I'm not a twelve-year-old."

Matthew's still grinning to himself and when he catches my eye, he winks.

I'm mildly flustered, so I busy myself with my lunch, leftover pancakes and sandwiches, plus sliced apples and bananas and vitamin water – my mum's always worried I suffer from vitamin deficiency.

"Anyways, since Aggy's the only sophomore on the council," Carlos continues as if we just paused in mid conversation and steals one of my apple slices, "Johnny's worried he'll be left with only a handful of members after all the seniors graduate."

"My name," Agatha says and furrows her brows, "Is not Aggy actually."

"You should come up with a nickname soon then," Carlos informs her, "Duncan and I started a list of potential nicknames yesterday. Aggy is in top spot, Aggs being a close second."

Agatha seems at a loss of words as she bites down on her lower lip. "I don't really like either. Also, I'm not a fan of Texas A&M."

"You could use it to your advantage if you play to apply at A&M," I suggest and hand Kaia the leftover pancakes, "Maybe they'll favor you if you, because you'd make an excellent mascot."

Agatha smiles shyly. "I want to study science though, and not in Texas."

"What about Gattie?" Kaia says and shares my pancakes with Johnny and Duncan, "Doesn't that sound cute?"

Agatha sighs and pokes at her miniature carrots. "I don't know ..."

My pancakes end up back on our side of the table and even Agatha takes a bite. I hold my breath as Matthew turns around, but instead of my pancakes he reaches for his pizza.

"Those are really good, June," Liling says.

"Thanks, um, my mum made them," I mumble, moving the bag a little to my side so Matthew knows he's allowed to take one,.

He actually does and grins at me.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome," I say really quickly and turn back to my food.

I'm trying my best to look cool and aloof, because no, I'm of course not overjoyed I'm sharing my food with people, as if we're close friends. Why do I care if they like my food anyway. Food sharing is so kindergarten-ish.

"Your mum makes the best pancakes," Logan says then, right as Vivian states they're way too sweet.

"Oh, how do you know?" Carlos asks and his eyes wander from Logan to me and back.

"Because June and I are friends, duh," Logan rolls his eyes and reaches out to pat my shoulder, "We're friends – close friends, no offense Carlos – since junior year. Her mum makes me pancakes often."

He's exaggerating reality so much I wince. Also, what is this with touching me. I slap his hand away.

"Ah, right," Carlos says, "I think I saw you guys hanging out a couple of times last year."

Logan nods, with this pleased expression on his face as if he's actually proud he managed to friendzone me once again. My stomach twists painfully, and I tighten the grip on my bag until my knuckles turn white. From the corner of my eye, I notice Matthew watching me, and there's this look in his eyes I can't really place. It makes me feel uncomfortable, so I force myself to release the tight grip and instead act like my food's the most interesting thing in the world. Not the hardest task, to be honest.

"You know, I'm thinking about making pancakes for the green & gold cleaning," Liling says as she picks one of my pancakes apart, "What do you guys think – first we're doing the cleaning, then we enjoy a late pancakes breakfast?"

"You are my hero, Liling," Carlos declares.

He leans over to dramatically kiss her cheek, and Liling giggles and pushes him away. Duncan looks murderous.

"We'll discuss that during the next meeting," Johnny says all formally, "I trust our new coordinators to fit it into the schedule."

I nod through a mouthful of sandwich and leave the real excitement to Kaia. She's beaming, cinnamon curls flying and eyes sparkling, as she leans closer to Johnny.

"I already did some research! I gathered quite some information online, and worked through all of our old schedules, and I found a lot I think we can improve to make the cleaning event even better –"

Johnny looks like he's already thanking the heavens for our – or more precisely Kaia's – recruitment.