Chapter 74

“No.”

“So you have no sphere of reference at all?”

“No.”

“It’s not as bad as you think. Your imagination is your worst enemy in this.” Trust me on this, Ana. Please.

“Do you have to do it?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

You really don’t want to know.

“Goes with the territory, Anastasia. It’s what I do. I can see you’re nervous. Let’s go through methods.”

We read through the list:

Spanking

Whipping

Biting

Genital clamps

Hot wax

Paddling

Caning

Nipple clamps

Ice

Other types/methods of pain

“Well, you said no to genital clamps. That’s fine. It’s caning that hurts the most.”

Ana pales.

“We can work up to that,” I state quickly.

“Or not do it at all,” she counters.

“This is part of the deal, baby, but we’ll work up to all of this. Anastasia, I won’t push you too far.”

“This punishment thing, it worries me the most.”

“Well, I’m glad you’ve told me. We’ll keep caning off the list for now. And as you get more comfortable with everything else, we’ll increase intensity. We’ll take it slow.”

She looks uncertain, so I lean forward and kiss her. “There, that wasn’t so bad, was it?”

She shrugs, still doubtful.

“Look, I want to talk about one more thing, then I’m taking you to bed.”

“Bed?” she exclaims and color flushes her cheeks.

“Come on, Anastasia, talking through all this, I want to fuck you into next week, right now. It must be having some effect on you, too.”

She squirms beside me and takes a husky breath, her thighs pressing together.

“See? Besides, there’s something I want to try.”

“Something painful?”

“No—stop seeing pain everywhere. It’s mainly pleasure. Have I hurt you yet?”

“No.”

“Well, then. Look, earlier today you were talking about wanting more.” I stop.

Fuck. I’m on a precipice.

Okay, Grey, are you sure about this?

I have to try. I don’t want to lose her before we start.

Jump.

I take her hand. “Outside of the time you’re my sub, perhaps we could try. I don’t know if it will work. I don’t know about separating everything. It may not work. But I’m willing to try. Maybe one night a week. I don’t know.”

Her mouth drops open.

“I have one condition.”

“What?” she asks, her breath hitching.

“You graciously accept my graduation present to you.”

“Oh,” she says, her eyes widening with uncertainty.

“Come.” I pull her to her feet, slip off my leather jacket, and drape it over her shoulders. Taking a deep breath, I open the front door and reveal the Audi A3 parked at the curb. “It’s for you. Happy graduation.” I wrap my arms around her and kiss her hair.

When I release her she stares dumbfounded at the car.

Okay…this could go either way.

Taking her hand, I lead her down the steps and she follows as if in a trance.

“Anastasia, that Beetle of yours is old and, frankly, dangerous. I would never forgive myself if something happened to you when it’s so easy for me to make it right.”

She gapes at the car, speechless.

Shit.

“I mentioned it to your stepfather. He was all for it.”

Perhaps I’m overstating this.

Her mouth is still open in dismay when she turns to glare at me.

“You mentioned this to Ray? How could you?” She’s annoyed, really annoyed.

“It’s a gift, Anastasia. Can’t you just say thank you?”

“But you know it’s too much.”

“Not to me it isn’t, not for my peace of mind.”

Come on, Ana. You want more. This is the price.

Her shoulders sag, and she turns to me, resigned, I think. Not quite the reaction I was hoping for. The rosy glow from the champagne has disappeared and her face is pale once more. “I’m happy for you to loan this to me, like the laptop.”

I shake my head. Why is she so difficult? I’ve never had this reaction to a car from any of my submissives. They’re usually delighted.

“Okay. On loan. Indefinitely,” I agree through gritted teeth.

“No, not indefinitely, but for now. Thank you,” she says quietly, and leaning up, she kisses me on the cheek. “Thank you for the car, Sir.”

That word. From her sweet, sweet mouth. I grab her and press her body to mine, her hair pooling in my fingers. “You are one challenging woman, Ana Steele.” I kiss her forcefully, coaxing her lips apart with my tongue, and a moment later she’s responding, matching my ardor, her tongue caressing mine. My body reacts—I want her. Here. Now. In the open. “It’s taking all my self-control not to fuck you on the hood of this car right now, just to show you that you are mine, and if I want to buy you a fucking car, I’ll buy you a fucking car. Now let’s get you inside and naked,” I growl. Then I kiss her once more, demanding and possessive. Taking her hand, I stride back into the apartment, slamming the front door behind us and heading straight for her bedroom. There I release her and switch on her bedside light.

“Please don’t be angry with me,” she whispers.

Her words douse the fire of my anger.

“I’m sorry about the car and the books—” She halts and licks her lips. “You scare me when you’re angry.”