Where You Belong: Chapter 8

I‘ve been living in this house for three weeks. That’s three weeks of amazing, lighthearted fun with Sienna. Every day that I get to know her, I fall more and more in love with her. I feel such a strong connection to her like we were meant to cross paths in this life.

Aside from my time with Sienna, that’s also three weeks of delicious food, learning about and tasting amazing wine, and feeling my heart skip a beat every time Gabriel walks into a room. I don’t know what the hell to do about it. I’ve never felt like this before, but it feels massively inappropriate to desire my boss so much.

And I think he may have some kind of attraction to me as well. That is when he’s not being a short-tempered, irritable dick.

The way that man can talk about wine is such a turn-on to me. Sometimes when he uses words like sexy, full-bodied, elegant, and smooth, I get confused about whether he’s talking about me or the wine. Because when he says those words, he keeps his dark eyes on me, filled with something that looks a lot like lust.

Tonight is a Saturday, and it’s my first night off that I’m not going out with Alicia or just hanging out at her place. I’m starting to feel more comfortable in this house, and I’m just too tired to go anywhere. I was hoping that Sienna and Gabriel would be going out, but judging by the laughter I hear downstairs, they are in for the night. I look down at my flannel sweatpants and tank top as I decide how much I care about him seeing me dressed down like this.

Deciding I’m not going to spend the entire summer worried about changing out of pajamas in order to leave this bedroom, I open my door and take slow steps downstairs as I hear Sienna’s laughter again.

‘Daddy!’ She giggles. ‘That’s not fair. Look how many you have.’

‘I can’t help it. I keep asking for the right cards,’ he defends.

When I enter the kitchen, I look over and see them sitting on the floor in front of the TV. He’s wearing jeans and a t-shirt, making the casual look sexier than it should be. He must sense my presence because his eyes meet mine, immediately making my body feel hot. All he needs to do is look at me, and I lose my breath.

Sienna notices me next. ‘Alex! Come over here!’

I walk into the room and sit down on the couch, feeling like I’m intruding on personal father-daughter time. It’s a little too late to just turn around and go back upstairs, though.

‘What are you playing?’ I ask as I rest my elbows on my knees.

‘Go Fish! But Daddy isn’t being very nice. He keeps getting matches, and it’s not fair,’ she says as she puffs out her bottom lip.

I have to bite my lip in an effort to hide my smile so she doesn’t think I’m laughing at her. A quick glance at Gabriel and I know he’s trying to fight back his as well.

‘Daddy! How could you do that to her?’ I feign annoyance.

Sienna gives him a knowing look, raising her eyebrows as she is now confident that she’s right since I took her side. What I’m not prepared for is the carefree laugh that falls from his mouth. I’m not used to seeing this side of him. I honestly wasn’t even sure it existed.

‘Alex, will you play with us?’ she asks animatedly.

‘Oh, I don’t want to get in the way of time with your dad.’

‘You’re not in the way, silly! Right, Daddy?’ She looks to him for agreement.

He shrugs his shoulders. ‘Not at all.’

I’m not sure he meant it, but I can’t exactly say no to Sienna. Plus, I’ve missed her. It’s only been one day, but I’m used to spending most of my time with her.

‘Then count me in.’ I bop her nose. It’s our new thing, and I love the adorable giggle it always produces.

‘Okay! Daddy, let’s go have that sprinkler party you promised!’ She starts jumping up and down.

I can see the shock arise in him as he looks between Sienna and me. ‘The what?’ His voice cracks.

‘You said we could have a sprinkler party after we played Go Fish, and I don’t want to play anymore cuz you’re beating me.’

Sprinkler party? I’m not sure what that entails, but if it means seeing Gabriel with his shirt off, my first instinct is hell yes.

The more sensible side of me is saying oh, shit, but both sides make valid points.

Gabriel starts to work his neck like he’s trying to figure out how to get out of this. ‘Alright. I did promise you. Alexis,’ he says, not able to meet my eyes, ‘you don’t have to play in the sprinklers with us.’

I’m not sure if he’s trying to be nice and let me off the hook, or if he’s trying to uninvite me, but either way, Sienna isn’t having it.

‘Nooooo! She already said she would play with us. Pleassssse, Alex. It’s so much fun. Plus, we eat ice cream after.’

‘Well,’ I look over at Gabriel, ‘I can’t say no to ice cream.’

I stand up with them while Sienna is jumping in excitement.

‘Okay, let’s all go get our bathing suits on. Alex, will you help me?’ she asks with her arms behind her back as she moves her hips back and forth.

Her little act to get what she wants makes me laugh. I stretch my hand out for her to grab it. ‘Of course, I’ll help you. Come on, sweetie. Let’s go.’

Sienna stands in her room in her pink and gold, one-piece bathing suit, looking like the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. The entire time I’ve been helping her find and put on her suit, my nerves have been dancing around my belly. Am I really spending the evening with Gabe playing in the sprinklers with his daughter? If someone asked me how I would be spending the first summer post-graduation, this is not what would have come to mind.

There is this gnawing guilt that keeps telling me to find a real job like everybody else, but I do my best to push it away when it surfaces. Like right now.

‘It’s your turn,’ Sienna says.

‘My turn for what?’ I ask, slightly confused.

‘For your bathing suit, silly!’

‘Oh, um, I was thinking I would just watch you play in the sprinklers.’

‘Nooo, that’s not the deal. You said you would play with us. Playing means getting in the sprinklers.’

She grabs my hand and stomps her way out of her bedroom, directing us into mine. Am I really about to let a four-year-old guilt me into this? I look down at her innocent little face, knowing she just wants to have fun with me, and I easily fold like a flat sheet. Not like the fitted sheets. Where I’m concerned, if you know how to fold a fitted sheet, you have some sort of sorcery in you.

I open my drawer and look at the two bathing suit options I have. Both are two pieces. I’m a twenty-one-year-old, of course, I don’t own a one-piece swimsuit. I settle for the red one. Even though its color is flashier, it’s not a string bikini like the black one, so it offers more coverage.

After I run to my bathroom to put it on, I look in the mirror. There’s no way I’m walking downstairs in a freakin’ bikini. I scurry over to my dresser, where I grab a pair of black shorts and pull them on. That’s better. At least I’m not entirely exposed, and I don’t mind if I get these wet. Something about going without the shorts feels too intimate—like I’m something special to Gabe. More than just the nanny.

Sienna grabs my hand, and I instinctively smile. I love the feeling of her chubby little hand in mine. It makes me feel needed in this crazy life. Something I’m not used to feeling.

We walk downstairs hand in hand, and as we walk from room to room, calling Gabe’s name, he is nowhere to be found.

‘Let’s check outside,’ I suggest to Sienna.

As we reach the stone patio, my lady parts start to rejoice at the sight. Gabe is standing in the grass wearing only his swim trunks with his aviator sunglasses on while bending over with the hose in hand. This man makes the act of attaching the hose to a sprinkler feel like I’m watching a Magic Mike performance. I release Sienna’s hand as she charges for her dad while I try to figure out how to pick my jaw up off the ground.

And then, if I wasn’t already drooling, he turns around, and I’m greeted by his chest and abs.

Fuck, I’ve only seen this man eat Italian food and drink a shit ton of wine. How the hell does he look like that? This really is like Magic Mike. But the smile that spreads across his face when Sienna jumps into his arms does something to another part of my body…my heart.

The yard is covered in what looks like an obstacle course of sprinklers. There’s a standard sprinkler that is motioning back and forth, but there are also several contraptions of long tubes that wiggle and shoot water out in different directions and at varying speeds. There must be at least three hoses out there hooking these up.

‘What do you think, Alex?’ Sienna asks with her arms stretched open as if to present the show to me.

I inch closer and think I notice Gabe’s jaw clenching tighter as his head visibly looks from my legs up to my face. It’s hard to be sure with his sunglasses on.

‘It’s something,’ I tell Sienna. ‘I don’t think I’ve ever seen so many sprinklers set up at once.’

‘It’s our special sprinkler party that Daddy and I do. Right, Daddy?’

‘Right, sweetheart.’

‘Well, come on. We’ll show you how we do it.’ Sienna grabs my hand.

‘Is there a certain way to play in the sprinklers?’ I ask.

I look up at Gabe, who is smirking at me.

‘Sienna used to be afraid of water. I tried so many times to play in the pool with her, and she refused. She was afraid of getting her face wet. So, I started with sprinklers. I thought if I just threw her into it here, she would be fine in the pool. I made a game out of it. Whoever ran through the sprinklers and got the most wet would win an ice cream with all the toppings.’

I laugh out loud.

‘How do you even judge who got the most wet?’ I ask.

He smiles. ‘She always won.’

‘Is that why she was such a sore loser at Go Fish?’

He lets out a small, suppressed laugh.

‘Yeah.’ He scratches the back of his head. ‘We’re working on that. I may have had trouble allowing her to be upset for even a second after her mom left. I’m trying to let her understand disappointment.’

My face falls at the mention of his ex.

‘Sienna told me her mom left.’

His posture turns rigid. ‘We’ll be talking about that later.’

‘Let’s goooo, guys!’ Sienna whines below us. ‘Did Daddy tell you how to play?’

‘He did! I must say, I’m pretty amazing at getting really wet,’ I say, and the moment the words leave my mouth, I regret them. I risk a glance up at Gabriel, and I can sense the anger radiating off him.

Why must I always put my foot in my mouth when I’m around him?

‘I’ll bet I still beat you,’ Sienna says, hands on her hips, clearly not understanding the innuendo.

‘Bring it on!’ I try to deflect.

I stretch my right leg in front of my left in a lunge position.

Sienna giggles. ‘We aren’t racing, silly goose. The slower you go, the longer you stay under the water and the better chance you have of winning. That’s what Aunt Mia told me.’

‘Shhh. Don’t give away your secret,’ Gabriel fake whispers.

I’m relieved to see we’ve moved passed my unfortunate comment.

‘Okay. Countdown, Daddy!’ Sienna sings as she dances around in her bathing suit.

‘Countdown? Sounds like a race to me,’ I mutter to Gabe.

He smiles. ‘Three, two, one…go!’

Sienna takes off for the sprinklers as I wait for Gabe to go first. I want to see just exactly what is happening here. Sienna is standing above the main sprinkler as the water soaks her, clearly no longer afraid.

When I look over at Gabe, he’s at the snake sprinkler that is shooting off in several different directions.

Yep, Magic Mike!

I don’t even realize I’m still standing here, not participating, as I watch him run through the water, laughing while his body gets wet.

‘Alex!’ Sienna calls.

I jump, looking around as I realize what I was caught doing.

‘Was something distracting you?’ Gabriel smiles.

I pay no attention to his comment, even though he obviously knows I was looking at him. Instead, I run into the large sprinkler with Sienna as the two of us start to jump over it together. It’s pretty powerful. Within seconds, I’m already a goner, completely soaked.

‘Come on, let’s go to this one!’ she calls.

I follow her to the long tube that has different flowers going wild in every direction while water shoots out. We start to wind our way through the flowers. There’s no way to tell which way the flower is going to go. At one point, it blasts me right in the face. I scream at the sudden water invasion as I swat the water away.

Sienna giggles at me.

Damn, this idea of Gabe’s could have totally backfired and made this girl terrified of water. Good thing it worked!

I’m lost in my own little world with Sienna when Gabe sneaks up on us and yells. Sienna laughs while I jump and screech like the little chicken that I am.

The gut laugh that comes from Sienna has me following suit. Pretty soon, the three of us are all cracking up as we run through the flower jungle. I’m so focused on not getting blasted in the face again that I don’t see Gabe coming my way, and we collide. His arms wrap around my waist, catching me before I tumble back.

I’m giggling like a fool until I realize he is completely still. When I look up, he’s stone-faced, and his chest is rising up and down more rapidly. When his fingers dig into my sides, a soft moan escapes me.

Damn, these feelings he’s bringing out in me. I don’t know whether to follow them through or if my body will fail me again.

The thought is like a bucket of ice water dumped on me. I jump back quickly, turning to Sienna to try to bring myself back to the reason I’m here.

We continue to play in the water with Sienna, and both Gabe and I are careful to keep our distance from each other. I’m wondering if he’s happy or disappointed I pulled away. I’m not sure which one I feel.

‘Okay!’ Sienna yells. ‘Gather around.’

I stop and look at Gabe, who just shrugs at me. We walk to stand in front of this little four-year-old like we are her pets or something.

‘The sprinkler competition is over.’ She looks down at herself. ‘And I win!’

Gabe and I laugh. I’m relieved to feel the awkwardness has evaporated again.

Once the water is turned off, we all wrap up in our towels and head inside. Sienna is skipping in front of us, knowing that she is about to get ice cream.

‘I think your plan to ease her out of always winning needs a few tweaks,’ I whisper.

He smiles. ‘Yeah, I created a monster.’

Sienna downs her ice cream in record time while Gabe orders a pizza. The evening goes by smoothly as we eat on the couch and watch cartoons. It’s oddly comforting, and it’s one of the best Saturday nights I’ve ever had.