Chapter 3 : DEAL !!!

It took a while for Phun to drag me inside the house. (I will swear on my life that I really did try to resist, but I honestly couldn’t since he was stronger than I am) At last, my worrisome little butt is now seated under some trees in the garden in his mansion.

Phun is staring at me, it seems as if he has about a million and 800 thousand things he wants to tell me but he does not know which one to start off with.

Personally, I’m not exactly sure if I want to listen to him anyway. -_-”

“Noh!” He finally calls out my name. It made me jumped out of my seat. So now, which should I do first? Should I run? Dig a hole? Call the police? Or send a Bat-Signal? T___T

“Noh, listen to me carefully.” I really don’t want to. T___T

Phun is staring at my face, he can clearly see how put off I am by this. He lets out a sigh.

“I’m not gay. I already have a girlfriend. Girl-friend. You know her. Aim is my girlfriend.” What is with this dude? Why does he keep going back and forth with his words? Anyway, what he’s saying makes sense. I feel a whole lot better now.

Naturally, I quickly nod as a response. Because I do, in fact, know Aim who is Phun’s girlfriend. She is our age, but she doesn’t go to our school. (How can she? Our school is an all-boys school.) Aim is very beautiful, and I mean really beautiful. She looks pretty even when she’s not wearing any makeup. She dresses fashionably like those girls with money do. Basically, if she’s your girlfriend then there’s no way you’d ever be embarrassed by her. Especially when she comes to our school, everyone stares and begins to drool.

Everybody says that Aim and Phun are a match made in heaven. In fact, I was one of those people. They really do look good together.

So I can’t help but be curious as to what Phun will say next.

“But…I want to date you, Noh.”

##########. I’m done listening to this!

“Okay, Phun. I still insist on what I already told you. I think I’m gonna go, I don’t wanna listen to this anymore.” I quickly get up, intending to leave. I’m not kidding around. I don’t understand him at all. Why is he sitting here trying to convince me that he’s not gay? He even brought Aim up to back up his claim. But here he is telling me that he wants to act all freaky with me.

“My family is forcing me to date someone. I can’t really go against my parents’ wishes. I only have my little sister who can help me. She told me that if I have a boyfriend, then she’d help.”

Huh? What?! O.o He spoke so quickly and for so long that I barely got the gist of it. I only know that I need to pay attention right now.

“What was that? Talk slowly and clearly.”

“I said that my family is forcing me to date someone.” Phun lets out a huge sigh before he continues. Meanwhile, I walk back to sit beside him like before. “Okay?”

“I could never go against my parents. You already know that they’re very strict, Noh.” He’s right. I still remember that birthday party 2 years ago. I had to watch myself very carefully. I had to force myself not to curse, it’s worse than trying to hold a fart. I mean, if you fart people might not know (I think?) but if I start cursing, I knew I’d get kicked out of the fancy mansion for sure. After the party, I went to see Om.. He had to listen to me complain for about 3 hours. His ears practically went numb.

“But I don’t know why, they always let Pang have her way.” Phun continues, completely distracting my train of thoughts. What’d he just say? Right, Pang is his little sister. I vaguely remember her. Nong Pang can be quite intimidating from what I remember. So for Phun to tell me that even her parents are afraid of her, I’m not really surprised by that. -_-”

“So if she helps me by talking to them, then I won’t need to date whoever they want me to. But…” I raise my brows. But? But what?! During our Thai class, ajarn Ping told me that whatever follows the word “but” is always the main idea. Therefore, students must pay close attention to that during exams.

But…right now I kinda don’t wanna pay any attention to him. -_-” Is my main idea clear and concise?

“Can I not listen to this?”

“No, Noh! Let me finish.” He’s so forceful! T^T

So I sit with a tired look on my face as I wait for him to continue, yet I’m filled with anticipation. What does this chill down my spine mean? Does it mean I’m gonna lose virginity to Phun?! T___T

“Well, Pang…is kind of like girls these days, Noh. She loves to read yaoi mangas. I don’t know what’s up with her. She bought a ton of them, they’re in her room.” This conversation continues to get more frightening.

“So she told me that if I have a boyfriend, then she’ll speak to our parents for me. And if my boyfriend is cute, then she’d try even harder.”

##########. Will someone tell me how long it has been since I last blinked?

I start to pray inside my head. I pray that I’d go deaf for about 2 or 3 minutes. I promise I’ll go around Sanam Luang picking up trash for 3 months in return.

But none of the holy beings cared. T___T

“And you’re…cute.” This is the next sentence I hear.

Well, ##########! I’m sorry I was born smaller than you are. (Actually, I’m not short or anything, and Phun isn’t tall or anything either. But anyway…I’m still shorter than he is) I’m sorry that I was born into a Chinese family so I have light skin and that I could never get a tan. I’m sorry that even though I barely have double eyelids, my eyes are big and round. My lips are red too…my friends often make fun of me that I’m cute. But I never thought anything of it. Not until tonight that I realize he has officially made me feel like…

…I’m in hell!

It seems like he could read what I’m thinking without me having to tell him anything too.

“Aw, Noh. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. But…it’s not like I can get someone like Shane and tell Pang that he’s my boyfriend, right?” He sure knows how make a case for himself. He’s bringing up Shane. Shane is the best athlete at our school. You can probably guess that he’s gigantic.

“Why not ask those Angels gang for help?” I ask him referring to a group of rowdy katoeys that even us guys feel nervous around them. Surely, if Phun asks them to help, they’d fight each other just to do that.

“Pang doesn’t like that, Noh. She prefers gay guys, not katoeys.” And how am I gay exactly?! I really wanted to yell that in his face.

“There’s Oak, Dul, Vit. Those guys are small and cute. They’re even shorter than I am. Why don’t you ask them for help?!” I’m still trying to change his mind. It seems like Phun is at the end of his wits. He lets out another sigh.

“They’re straight like we are though. They wouldn’t agree to this.”

“So why me?!”

“Because you and I…can help one another in exchange.” I freeze in my track. Am I being threaten here?

I almost forgot that I still need Phun’s help. Basically, I see him as wads of money right now.

“Okay? We don’t need to pretend all the time, only in front of Pang. You’ll get the money for your club for sure.” ##########! Am I really willing to lose my dignity over 20,000 baht by being Phun’s wife (only in name) though?!

I stare at his smiling face while I’m thinking it through. But I didn’t get a chance before I heard a high-pitch voice.

“P’Phun, who is this?”