Chapter 17

Lauren

I placed my handbag on the couch and massaged my neck for a moment. I sat on the couch as I was feeling a lot tired to even move into my room.

I don't know if it's tiredness or just my usual laziness.

I waited for Ethan as he went straight to his study after he got a call.

I sat on the couch humming a song to myself for five minutes and then stood up to walk into my room.

I was about to open the door to my bedroom when someone gripped my arm harshly from behind and spun me around.

I raised my head and looked up to see Ethan's red eyes.

He held my arms harshly and pulled me closer to him till we are just inches apart.

I gulped when I saw his angry expression.

This 'Ethan' was nowhere near to the 'Ethan I laughed with' just a few minutes before.

"When were you going to tell me?" he fumed at me.

I frowned at his raised voice.

"What?" I tried asking but he just pulled me closer glaring hard at me.

"When. Were. You. Going. To. Tell. Me?" he stressed the words and I gulped listening to his cold voice.

"I don't unders-" he scoffed at me and left my arms harshly.

I took two steps back at the impact.

"Don't act smart Lauren. Didn't you open one of the drawers I locked in my study?" he asked glaring at me and my heartbeat stopped for a second.

How did he know?

I know I should've just minded my own business.

Just when I think something good is happening between us, this has to happen.

"I-I don't know what y-you're talking about." I lied quickly and he just blinked at me exasperated.

"Don't you dare lie to me, Lauren" He warned me and I looked up for a second before looking down.

"I-I-mean I-" I stuttered till I heard his voice.

"ANSWER ME DAMMIT!" He yelled at me and I looked down breathing hard.

"I-I did. I op-opened it but I didn't know that it would be this important, Ethan. I'm sorry." I said trying to mend the damage I did.

"IMPORTANT!? I locked the damn thing, Lauren. It's locked for a reason. I locked it for my own privacy. Are you this dumb to not understand what I'm saying?" He growled at me and I looked down not to let any tears fall.

"I'm sorry. I just- I didn't-" I cleared my throat but he cut me off again.

"Stop it, Lauren. I don't want to listen to any more lies from your mouth." He accused me and I frowned looking up at him.

"I didn't mean to lie or anything, Ethan. I was just -" his voice interrupted me again this time.

"You were just WHAT?" he growled at me taking a step towards me and I couldn't face him so took a step back.

He stared at me for a moment and I couldn't even look up as I know what I did was a mistake.

"Just when I think we are going somewhere in this crap thing called 'relationship', You had to do this. You ruined it even before it started, Lauren." He said looking at me disappointed.

Disappointed?

The emotion which haunts me in my nightmares.

I always thought I am not good enough to my parents.

I felt like I was a disappointment to them. To everyone.

I never wanted him too to be disappointed in me.

I looked up to see him looking away from me breathing hard.

I took a deep breath to talk to him and control the damage I've done, but he just turned his back on me.

We always ignore each other when we argue, but this time his ignorance hurt me.

Why am I disappointing everyone?

The fact that he is angry and disappointed and it is solely because of me didn't settle well with me.

I blinked back the tears that were threatening to fall.

I needed to quickly move away from there.

I needed to breathe.

"I'm sorry." I spoke in a weak tone controlling my tears.

I looked up to see if he would react anything at all but he just kept his back to me not even giving a glance at me.

And that was my last straw, I took a shaky breath in and walked out of the house.

***

I rang the calling bell and I waited for that person to open the door.

I know I did a mistake. I don't need any more people to judge me and say I'm wrong.

I just need a warm hug and who would understand me enough.

So, here I am. And I know, only this person in this world will not judge me and will understand me in any situation.

The door opened revealing Alice, who I missed very badly in the past few days.

"Well, and here I thought someone completely forgot me." She said dressed in blue pyjamas.

When she saw my humorless expression, she furrowed her eyebrows looking concerned.

She immediately came toward me and wrapped her arms around me.

"Are you okay?" she asked softly and her voice alone calmed me a bit.

I wrapped my arms around her tightly and the tears I controlled hard ran down my cheeks.

"Shh...It's Okay." She whispered and I tightened my hold on her.

"As much as I'd like to hug you forever, I don't want any random boys to see us like this and get any wrong idea about me." She said and I moved back wiping my tears.

"Let's go inside." she said and ushered me in closing the door.

I walked in and sat on the couch.

She came and gave me some water which I gladly accepted.

"So, what happened?" she said sitting on the couch facing me.

I told her everything from opening his locker to the way he is mad at me right now.

She stared at me with an emotionless expression.

When I finished I waited for her response.

I already know what her first word would be.

'Seriously?'

3...2...1

"Seriously, Lauren." She glared at me.

"I know." I sighed leaning my head back on the couch.

"But why would you do that?" she wondered.

"I was curious." I answered and she threw her hands around muttering an 'of course'

"Curious? Right. Were you ever this curious to learn new things like cooking or driving? Nope, why would we?" She scolded me like a mom.

"Don't mock me." I pouted glaring at her.

"I'm not." She said and I rolled my eyes at her.

"Lauren, you do know what you did was wrong right?" she asked me softly and I sighed.

"I know."

"Did you apologize to him yet?" she asked again.

"I did but he isn't even ready to see me. He hates me, Alice." I said punching the couch.

"I recently bought this couch, Lauren. Don't damage this poor thing." She said patting the couch I just punched, making me angrier and I punched it again this time harder, to which she just shook her head mumbling something to herself.

"He doesn't hate you, Lauren. he is just angry right now." She spoke but I shook my head.

"He is even disappointed in me, Alice. Disappointed. I never wanted him to be disappointed in me." thinking of his words and the way he looked at me made me wrap myself like a ball and cry forever.

"Lauren listens to me. it's okay. It will get better." She said wrapping her arm around me from the side and I placed my head on her shoulder.

"I hope so." I said and she nodded at me.

"Lauren I'm not one of those friends who will support your decisions even when you are wrong. I'm one of those who will say to your face when you are wrong. I don't know if that even makes sense. Do you understand what I'm saying?" she asked looking confused and I stared at her for a minute.

"Honestly...No." I shook my head plainly and she just exhaled loudly.

"Of course, I know we have the same two brain cells." She said and I feigned offended.

"Please, Don't include me. I'm better than you." I shrugged proudly and she scoffed playfully at me.

"Oh is it? Aren't you the one who once asked me what does quarter until four mean?" she raised a eyebrow at me.

"And you still haven't answered that question." I blinked twice staring at her and she mirrored my actions.

We stayed silent for a moment before bursting into laughter.

We laughed for a whole minute and eventually the laugh died down when I remembered the situation I'm in.

"What do you think I should do now?" I asked her and she sighed.

"Apologize to him and if he doesn't accept divorce him." She said in a playful tone.

"Yeah. That's what I'm thinking." I spoke pretending to be serious.

"I was kidding." She said listening to my response.

"Who said I was serious?" I spoke and we both burst into laughter after a moment of intense stare.

"So... are you ok now?" she asked and I nodded my head giving her a smile.

"Good, now go and check for something to eat in the fridge." She ordered and I stopped smiling.

"I was crying just a minute before." I said and she just rolled her eyes at me.

"Well, you aren't now. Are you?" she challenged me and I shook my head at her.

"You are such a bully." I said and she replied.

"Only for you sweetheart." She said sweetly and I walked towards the fridge.

I opened it and there isn't anything proper to eat. Well, there is if you can count ice cubes as edible food.

"The fridge is as scarce as desert, Alice. There is nothing." I said slumping beside her on the couch.

"Oh, I forgot to buy groceries." She said and I nodded my head at her.

"Well, why don't we go to our hangout spot. It's been a long time," she said and I agreed.

***

We both walked towards Alice's car in her apartment's parking.

"Can I drive?" I asked her feigning innocence.

"No. I'm not that eager to die." She said getting into the driver's seat and I sat in the passenger's seat.

"Excuse me, I can drive," I stressed and she turned towards me.

"Oh really, tell me which one is the brake?" she asked me showing three pedals.

"One of the three." I answered and she just rolled her eyes at me and started the car.

"Do you remember once how you started driving the car but forgot how to apply brakes?" she snickered at me.

"Please, I didn't forget or anything. It's just I applied pressure on both accelerator and brakes at the same time. So, the car got confused. It wasn't my mistake." I shrugged and she looked at me ridiculously.

"Yeah, the car got confused" she scoffed at me.

"Enough of my great driving skills. Did you get any boyfriend?" I asked her and she just sighed.

"You know it's going to be difficult with the ideal man list I have." She spoke and I couldn't accept more.

Her ideal man list is ridiculous.

He has to be rich. Okay!

He shouldn't be romantic. What?

He has to have a tattoo on his bicep. Fine...

He has to have a 'son' in his name like Jason, Mason. This is ridiculous!

And the weird ideal list goes on.

Alice stopped the car when we reached.

"Here we reached. Your favourite place 'hotspot'." She joked and I rolled my eyes at her.

So here it is, Centuries ago, when there is no internal at all, not literally of course, I accidentally called this place 'hotspot' instead of 'hotshot'.

But even after all this time, she couldn't stop mocking me for that.

Typical Alice.

We both sat at our table and ordered us espresso.

"You know, you're getting no man with that ideal list of yours." I said and she just smirked at me.

"Says the one who comes crying to me for relationship advice." She spoke.

"Hey! That's offensive." I defended myself.

"But you still love me," she spoke in a sweet tone.

"No, I don't." I glared at her sipping my drink.

"I know you do." She said but I rolled my eyes at her playfully.

After some hours of chatting, I realized it was so late and we decided to call it a day.

My mood is not completely uplifted, but I definitely felt better.

I always believe, you should have those few selected people or things or places that are close to your heart which can bring peace in your life when it is hurricane dancing on your head.

Alice is that one among others who can bring stability in my life.

I checked my jeans pocket and remembered I even forgot to bring my phone.

Alice decided to drop me off and when she did, I took my leave with her before walking towards the penthouse. I looked around and it appeared as of midnight.

I rang the calling bell as I didn't bring my keys with me.

The door immediately pulled open to see Ethan with a creased forehead looking distressed.

When his eyes landed on me. he took a deep breath and visibly calmed down.

I waited for him to speak anything but he didn't.

He stepped aside and I entered in.

I turned around and parted my lips to apologize for the final time for invading his privacy when he beat me.

"Where were you? I was worried sick for you. You didn't even take your phone with you. You know how dangerous this can be" his ramble continued.

Wait-

Is he talking to me?

He talked to me.

A smile broke on my lips when I realized he is indeed talking to me.

When he saw me smiling, he frowned.

"Why are you smiling like a ghost?" he accused but I couldn't care less.

"You are talking to me," I said and he rolled his eyes at me.

"Yes. I am." He said simply and I smiled even more.

"So, are you not angry at me anymore?" I asked again and he looked like he just realized it now.

He stared at me intensely for a minute which felt like an hour for me.

He finally shook his head muttering, "No."

I couldn't control my excitement and act on my first impulsive thought.

I stood on my toes and wrapped my arms around his neck hugging him tightly.

He stood frozen at my actions.

I was too busy snuggling closer to him to see him getting frozen.

I stayed for a moment there and when he was about to wrap his arms around me, did I realize what I did.

I widened my eyes and quickly let him go and moved two steps back.

"I'm sorry. I -I was" I stuttered turning red.

"It's ok." He said clearing his throat and that made me feel better.

I looked up at him and even his cheeks were lightly pink shaded.

"Where were you till now?" He asked me.

"I was with Alice." I said and he nodded at me.

I was about to walk to my room when he stopped me again.

"Did you eat something?" he asked quickly and I thought for a second before answering.

"I had an espresso." He nodded at me and I was going to walk away when he stopped me again.

"Are you hungry?" he asked me and I furrowed my eyebrows.

I initially thought of saying 'no' but answered otherwise. It can be an excuse to spend a little more time with him.

"Yes," I answered and he nodded at me before walking towards the kitchen.

"What are you doing?" I asked him.

"You are hungry, right? I'm going to cook something for you." He said and shook my head.

"You don't have to do that, Ethan." I said but he just ignored me.

"Hot chocolate?" he asked and I nodded my head at him.

He started doing it and I sat on the stool in front of him.

I can't believe he isn't angry at me anymore.

I thought I completely ruined something we had before.

Maybe I didn't screw everything.

I couldn't stop smiling, looking at him walking around the kitchen.

I never knew men who can cook could be this HOT.

***

He placed the bowl on the kitchen island in front of me and sat beside me.

"Don't you want some?" I asked him but he just rejected me plainly.

"Your loss." I said before giving my taste buds the delicious hot chocolate.

I closed my eyes and moaned at the taste.

When I opened my eyes, saw Ethan looking at me with an amused expression.

When I raised my eyebrow at him, he said nothing.

I continued devouring the hot chocolate.

"Do you think anyone would believe us if we said we had an argument earlier?" I asked him chuckling and he just give me a simple nod.

"Lauren, I need you to promise me that you will never go through my things ever again." He asked me seriously and his words slightly hurt me.

I felt like he didn't trust me enough?

But that's alright, we are no childhood buddies to trust each other on sharing everything. We are just getting to know each other.

Maybe we'll get there someday.

But I'm just glad that he sorted it all out with me.

When I realized he was waiting for an answer from me.

"Of course. I promise." I said and his lips pulled up into a smile.

"And... I. I'm sorry. For yelling at you earlier or even if I hurt you." he apologized looking down and my heart exploded with different feelings. I've never heard him apologizing before.

But the fact that he apologized even when I'm wrong for the major part, swelled my heart.

I smiled in response and nodded at him.

Throughout the time I ate, I felt his eyes upon me staring at me.

When I'm almost finished and not more than two spoons of chocolate are left, I asked him again.

"Do you want some? This is the last time I'm going to ask." I asked him fully knowing he would reject.

I scooped some and was about to place it in my mouth when I heard his voice.

"Maybe I'll have this." He said.

"Ah! too late." I said bringing the spoon down to my mouth finishing it off.

I smiled at him and placed the spoon back in the bowl.

"I don't think so." he said  squinting his eyes and I looked at him confused.

He raised his hand and brought it down to my face. He placed his thumb gently on the area just under my lips wiping the chocolate which I didn't realized yet.

he brought that thumb aback to his mouth finishing off that chocolate from his finger.

"It is good." He said and my heartbeat increased at his actions.

My widened eyes stayed on his lips for a bit more than I'd ever want.

When I realized I was staring at his lips, I looked down controlling my wandering inappropriate thoughts and got up from the stool.

I placed the bowl in the sink and turned toward him.

"I'm tired. Good night." I spoke shakily.

"Good night." He said with a smirk and I stared at him for a moment.

When I saw his smirk, I quickly rushed to my room and closed the door to calm my erratic breathing and cool down the heat on my face.

I looked in the mirror to see my red flushed face and only question was in my mind at the moment.

What is happening to me?

Author's notes.

Thanks for reading.

Please vote, comment and share.