Professor Astor: Chapter 55

The kids look surprised to find me standing in front of their mother’s house. I suppose they’ve gotten used to Leia picking them up every night, but that’s all over now.

“Make sure you hug Mum goodbye,” I tell them. “She’s leaving tomorrow.” Good riddance. She and I could’ve co-parented the kids harmoniously, but she ruined it. As their mother, she’s supposed to put her kids first, but she never did.

I watch as the kids run back to hug her one last time. Alice’s eyes are on me, and the way she smiles makes a chill run down my spine. “You’ll miss me, won’t you, Adrian?”

I glance at the kids and force myself not to snap at her. “I’m sure the kids will miss you.”

Alice grins at me, a provocative look in her eyes. “How is Leia? Is she still in the picture?”

I grit my teeth and force a smile. “Of course she is.”

Alice chuckles, and it takes all of me to keep standing here. “She won’t be for long. I hope she’s able to graduate, you know? Poor thing.”

I take a step forward, tempted to yank the kids away from her, but I resist. I knew it was her. That fucking bitch. Can’t she see what she’s fucking doing? It’s the kids she’s hurting most. Now that she’s leaving, they’ll need Leia, but Ley won’t be there. Because of her. Because of her petty foolish behavior, our kids won’t have the one person who was able to pull them out of the funk they were in when we first moved here. My Princess and I can weather every storm. No matter what we’re put through, we’ll be fine. The same can’t be said of the kids.

“I’ve let it go this time, Alice. I won’t extend you that same courtesy ever again. You’ve reached the limits of my patience, and there’s nothing I won’t do to protect my family. That includes Leia now. It does not, however, include you. Remember that.”

She stills, her eyes widening. “You never once cared about me that way,” she says. “When I asked for a divorce, you didn’t even blink twice.”

I smile at the kids and tip my head toward the car. “Get into the car, you two. I just need to talk to Mum for a moment.”

The two of them exchange glances I can’t decipher before they both nod and walk to the car. I watch them until the door closes behind them before I turn back to Alice.

“You and I are over, Alice. What is the point of reminiscing now? I don’t understand what you’re doing. You’re the one who walked away, so why are you sabotaging my happiness now? The kids love her, Alice. After a couple of extremely tough weeks, she’s the one who returned the joy we took from them. Why don’t you want that for them?”

“You don’t get to replace me so easily, Adrian. This girl came out of nowhere, and you’re suddenly smitten? She used our children to get to you, and I won’t have it. She’s Amara’s best friend, so she knows what your net worth is.”

I close my eyes and inhale deeply as I pray for patience. She did not just insinuate that my girlfriend is a gold digger, did she? Is this all about the money? My lawyers prevented her from getting her hands on any of my assets, and I know she’s still bitter about it.

“She didn’t come out of nowhere, Alice. Remember when I came back from my trip to see my grandfather two years ago? I told you about a woman I’d met and slept with, because I wanted to be transparent with you about everything since we were still living together, despite our divorce papers already having been signed.”

She nods, the confidence leaving her expression.

“That was Leia. I’ve thought of her every day from the moment I walked away from her. Hell, even when she walked back into my life, I tried to resist. I get it, Alice. I didn’t want to introduce a new woman into the kids’ lives either, and perhaps if she hadn’t been their nanny and hadn’t stolen their hearts, she wouldn’t have stolen mine so quickly.” I pinch the bridge of my nose, wishing I could make her understand. “She’s the best thing that ever happened to me, Alice. I get that you might not want to hear that, considering our history, but she is. You walking away from me is the best thing you ever could’ve done for me. I’m happier now. I didn’t even realize how intensely unhappy I was with you, because it’d just become the status quo. You were right when you told me you never felt loved, like I didn’t appreciate you. I wish I could’ve been the man you wished I were, but it’s too late for that now.”

It’s hard for me to explain that I get it now. I get why she felt so lonely in our marriage. What I thought was love was really just comfort. She and I had gotten so comfortable together that we refused to acknowledge that we’d outgrown each other. We were never right for each other. What I feel for Leia, I never felt for Alice.

“This isn’t what was meant to happen, Adrian,” she says, her voice breaking. My heart clenches when a tear drops down her cheek. I don’t want to hurt her, not after all the pain we barely survived, but I need to make it clear to her that we’re over.

“I was so angry when you signed the papers so easily, but I was certain that you’d change your mind, that you’d fight for me. I expected you to realize what you were losing, but you never did. If anything, you seemed relieved.”

I look into her eyes and shake my head. It shouldn’t surprise me that she asked for a divorce just to see if I’d finally fight for her. That’s how emotionally deprived I’d made her. I was never able to meet her needs, and I see that now. I can’t explain why it’s different with Leia, but it is.

“I’m sorry, Alice. I’m sorry things didn’t work out between us. I know it would’ve been best for the kids if it did.”

She nods, and for once, I see defeat in her eyes.

“I love Leia,” I tell her. “I won’t give up on her, no matter what you do to us. I will, however, start defending my family. Nothing you do will touch her. I’ll make sure of it. Remember that all your actions have consequences, though. The kids may be young and impressionable now, but they won’t always be. If you want to be a part of their lives, then you need to start thinking about what kind of influence you are, and whether they’ll want to keep you in theirs.”

I take one last look at my ex-wife and sigh before walking away. What a fucking mess. I hope we make it out of this shit intact, but with each passing day, I’m more worried.

The kids sit up in their seats when I step into the car, their gazes on the back of my head. “What is it?” I ask.

“Why are you picking us up?” Colton asks, his tone annoyed. I smile to myself as I start the car. The kids have mostly been ignoring Leia, and now they’re unhappy they didn’t get to see her today?

“Leia will no longer be working for us. She’s not your nanny anymore.”

I wasn’t surprised when Asha called me to tell me she was replacing Leia, and since Ley seemed fine with it, I am too. It’ll only be for a little while, after all.

“Why?” Lucy asks, sounding shocked, and just a touch scared.

“You guys haven’t been talking to her, and it’s clear you don’t want her around anymore. Shouldn’t you be happy?”

The kids look at each other, and though the sorrow I see in their eyes should tug at my heartstrings, it really just reinforces how good of a lesson this is for them. “If you keep pushing people away, they’ll eventually leave. You can’t expect someone to stay if you don’t treat them well. She’s left now, so what are you two going to do about it? Do you want her to stay away, or do you want her to come back? I won’t talk to her for you. If you miss her, you will have to tell her yourself.”

I see the helplessness they exude, but I won’t give them the support they need. I won’t give them any way to keep blaming Leia for anything.

“Mum said she asked for a divorce… is that true?” Lucy asks.

I look at her in my rear-view mirror and nod. “Yes, Lucy. Like I told you before, what happened between your mother and me was just between the two of us. It had nothing to do with Leia.”

She swallows hard and look out the window, a distraught expression consuming her lovely little face.

Looks like my kids have a lot to think about, and so do I. Leia’s family isn’t going to be easy to conquer, but I have to win them over.