25: I See It, I See You

❝ I wanna know if I could be the one, would you wanna wake up next to me, I wanna know if you would stay or run, if every night wasn't an ecstasy ❞

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The next few days were spent surviving classes, eating lunch and hanging out with friends, slipping some time here and there where Ray and I could get privacy and most importantly, studying for the economics mock test on Friday.

Our group spent every evening in the library, studying our butts off. I helped them as much as I could, making them revise and go through my notes, re- reading the formulas almost a hundred times till they whined.

"So, after the test," started Simon as everyone looked up from their books, "should we go to the carnival in Adlestone next town? I mean, we're studying our butts off and we do need a break, don't we?" Everyone seemed to roll over the idea in their mind, and ultimately, gave in with a little bit of coaxing from Katie's side and aggressive finger pointings from Simon's side.

"Yeah, well, it's cool." Jason said, "Anyways, I wanted to check out the new casino they've started over there."

"We're not going there for rummy and useless bets, asshole." Olivia smacked Jason right in the middle of his head as he grumbled profanities.

"I'll have to leave early though." Friday was the day dad was coming home, and I wouldn't want to miss it for life. "My dad's coming back home, so I'll have to be back by 7 pm tops."

"Oh wow, he's coming back after almost a year right?" Jack questioned and I nodded at that. "We never really asked you, what does he exactly do?"

"He's a doctor, military doctor at that." Everyone seemed fascinated, and my heart swelled up at that. "He's sent with high end secret troops to parts of world which are unknown. It's always a mission or task the military has to carry out, and usually there are casualties. He tends to the injured soldiers and officers." I supplied, as everyone nodded with awe.

"That's crazy, because usually, such people are the real heroes and we keep pushing them in the background." Olivia wondered.

"Yeah, for the world, he's a doctor. But for us, my mom and I, he's a hero." My eyes teared up a little at the thought of seeing him again after ages when Ray's hands stroked mine lightly. He didn't invade my personal space, but made his presence known.

"We would love to meet him." Jack smiled. "Only if he's okay with it though."

I laughed. "Why wouldn't he be?" My eyes lingered on every person sitting around me. "I've great people as friends and my dad would be happy to meet you guys, who have non stop been a support and nothing else."

"Babe shut up, we wouldn't even pass the tests if it wasn't for you!" Simon threw an arm around me as everyone nodded in agreement. "And besides, you introduced Katie to us, for which Jack sure is over the moon."

The said duo blushed while Jack immediately tackled Simon to the floor, even making Ray crack up.

"Fine—FINE! Stop—oh my god. Not the fucking tickles!" Loud laughs echoed as Jack continued to torture Simon till he had tears in his eyes.

I glanced at the boy beside me, whose eyes were focused on the crackheads on the floor, a small smile painted on his full lips, growing the same on my face as well.

I was in love with life at the moment.

××

"I fucking got the numericals right!" Simon roared as he pulled me in for a hug, followed with the clearing of throat and shoving Simon away by Ray. "Can you believe it? Oh my god, I'm not going to fail yet again!" His next target was Olivia who rolled her eyes but hugged him back nevertheless. I smirked at that.

We all were waiting for Jason to bring up his truck, which was to be our ride to the carnival next town.

"Why does the fucker need to hug you? A simple thank you is enough." Ray glared at the retreating figure of Simon as I giggled at his obvious jealousy.

"So," I drawled, slipping a hand in Ray's. "How was your test?"

"Meh. I tried my best." I shook my head at that as he smiled and pulled me closer. "It was good. I expect atleast above average." This time around, Ray had been seriously studying, and I knew it wasn't possible for him to fail even if he tried.

"Have you decided what you want to do after graduating? There's only a few months left for that." His demeanor changed, and his face fell. A visible and audible sigh escaped his lips as he stared off into the distance.

"I don't know." He replied.

"Isn't it time to send those not so secret portraits of yours to art colleges?" His head snapped to meet my eyes, as his questioning gaze became evident.

"Wait, how do you—" I cut him off.

"I just know. I've seen them. I've seen you doodling shaded eyes, lips, hands in the corners of your books. I've seen you buying stationery from the shop a few blocks over and then hiding it in the deep corner of your backpack. I see it. I see you." He looked visibly frozen, and I rubbed his calloused, rough hand with mine. "You can hide your beautiful personality and talents from everyone, but not from me. Never."

"I—" He started.

"Ayo, you lovebirds! C'mon it's time to go!" Katie shouted and waved us over, as we looked to see them all seated already. I sighed and walked upto the passenger seat, seating myself between Ray and Jack. Simon took up the task of navigating, while Jason drove, with me squeezed in between the two hulks. Katie and Olivia blasted songs from the very back, plus engaged in a heated debate over Keeping up with Kardashians.

Everyone seemed to be happy, apart from Ray, who had decided that the window was his new bestfriend and the outside view his wife. Jack kept me entertained, and sweetly enquired about my dad and mom, but the nagging sensation was always present at the back of my mind.

"And here we go, ta-da!" Simon threw open the truck door and walked up to the carnival entrance, clearly excited and pumped up.

"I'll go buy the tickets!" Katie waved the bills in her hand and pulled me along with her. "Well that was an excuse to get to talk to you alone, because dont we have a lot of things to talk about!" She animatedly dragged me to the ticket counter, as we waited for our turn.

"What—?" I blinked confusedly at the whole ordeal.

"Well fuck that, but tell me first, what's wrong with you and Ray? I noticed that in the ride, you know." I sighed and rubbed two fingers on the visible lines on my forehead, feeling a headache building up.

"Nothing's wrong, we just had a discussion, which I think he didn't like." And then I told her the whole story, while she dealt with the tickets. We started walking back to the front where the others were.

"Well, surely, he's wrong to ignore you like that, but I feel you invaded his personal space. There must be a reason he didn't tell you he's into art or something. You shouldn't have over stepped." She placed a hand on my shoulder as I nodded.

"I know—I, I just want the best for him. Man's got talent but he just doesn't want to accept it." I moved the weight from my right leg to left, before continuing. "You should have seen his drawings, Katie, he's wonderful. And he always has a reason, but he never trusts me enough to tell me the reason."

He had his reasons to hide things from me. He had his reasons to hurt me. He had reasons for every fucking thing.

"I know, I know how you feel." She held my face in her hands. "Just remember that he's trying his best. He's new to this. Of course, it doesn't justify hurting you the way he did, but give him time to open up. No one does that in a jiffy." I nodded at that.

She smiled as she patted my cheek teasingly. "Talk it out with him, okay?"

I bit my lip and nodded as she pulled me in for a hug. "Let's go then." We made our way back to where the others stood.

"There you are! Took you a fucking eternity." And there he went, grabbing his ticket from Katie's hand to the ticket checker, not even waiting for us. Well, Simon was the most excited, and we all just chuckled at his childish behavior.

Everyone eventually scattered in their respective pairs, Olivia running behind an energetic Simon, Jason third wheeling an annoyed Jack and Katie. Ray stood soundlessly, his hands tucked in his pockets. His eyes drifted up to mine, as he sighed and grabbed both our tickets.

"Are you mad?" I decided to break the silence.

"No, June." His voice wasn't cold, but it wasn't warm either.

"Well I feel like you are. I am sorry for what I said, I shouldn't have over st—" I stepped up in front of him, walking backwards as he shook his head and cut me off. "I am not, so let it go." His voice was final, as I decided to stay mum, quite getting annoyed myself.

For the part where I was with him, there were no conversations, only small talks wherein I asked him to play games to which he replied a negative. Soon, I found Simon and Olivia lining up in front of a rollercoaster and decided to join them, giving up trying to talk to him and instead having fun for a few moments at the very least.

They welcomed me with bear hugs and excitedly dragged me to the first seat of the rollercoaster, and we screamed our lungs out the whole time. At the end of the day, I had a huge smile plastered on my face and laughter spurting out of me every few seconds.

Simon successfully failed to shoot the water balloons, as he so heroically had declared to win the soft toy for Olivia. A sulk stretched up his face as Olivia coaxed him to let it go. The loss was long forgotten, as his eyes laid on the rifle game and he was running towards it in a jiffy.

"Oh my god! Did you guys try out the Hula Loop? That ride is crazy!" Jack, Jason and Katie came rushing to our trio, Jason immediately joining Simon in the rifle game. "We did, we did! It was epic." Olivia agreed, as we watched the boys shoot the targets.

"Where's Ray?" Katie questioned and a considerable silence fell around us. I cleared my throat, as my gaze subconsciously traveled down. Even Simon and Jason paused their shooting, looking over their shoulders.

"Yeah, thinking of that, you should have been with him, then why did you join us?" Simon questioned.

"I uh—I don't know, he said he wasn't feeling well." Katie cast a long glance at me, and Olivia narrowed her eyes.

"Why do I get the feeling that it's not the case?" Jason pried, causing heat to rise up my neck. I only stared, fiddling with my fingers, not quite knowing the answer to their questions myself. "Oh there he is." Everyone turned around to find Ray approaching us with a blank expression.

"Where the fuck were you? And who leaves their girlfriend around like that?" Jack took a few steps forward towards him, waiting for his reply.

"I wasn't feeling well; used the restroom for a while and then sat on a bench. Besides, she was safe with Olivia and Simon." He replied bluntly, and I internally sighed, thankful that our alibis matched.

"I don't think so." Jason observed yet again, his eyes flitting between us both. Ray's eyes fell on me, and he clenched his jaw.

"I said it is like that so why the fuck are you prodding ovef the matter again and again?" His voice raised a pitch high and my heart clenched at that. Why was he suddenly so cold? What wrong had I done? Only because I'd told him I liked his drawings and that he should think about making it his major?

"Sort yourself the fuck out and then talk back. We all know something's wrong." Olivia spit. "Let's go, the last round for ferris wheel is about to start soon." She pushed past Ray, bumping into his shoulder as the others went the same way too.

I was missing something here. I felt guilty, even though I hadn't made that big of a mistake. My eyes met his and I looked away immediately, not waiting up for him and walking the way every one was going.

The queue for the ferris wheel was quite long, but fortunately, we made it to the last few people allowed to ride according to the seating capacity.

"Two people in a seat!" The worker shouted, as he busied himself in seating the people.

"Can I go with you, Jason?" I asked the brunette boy who sheepishly smiled but said no.

"That girl over there has been eyeing me for quite some time, I think I'll ride with her." He winked at me. "Sorry June. Next time." I sighed. Of course he was allowed to have fun. He shouldn't have to deal with my petty ass.

"I guess I'll have to sit this one back then." I mumbled, starting to turn back.

"Who said so?!" Katie screamed and before I could make sense of anything, I was pushed on a seat. There was no time to make myself comfortable, as another body collapsed beside mine.

Ray. Of course.

"Sort it out, and don't come back before you guys have made out atleast ten times!" Katie squealed and I groaned. The wheel started moving, and I held onto the bar in frustration, cursing my bestfriend in my head.

Rugged breaths sounded from beside me, and I turned to look at him. He turned at the same time, as we both only looked into each other's eyes.

"Hi." He whispered.

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Buckle up, everyone, we're in for a ride <3