(Chapter 12)

Araan

It's been years since I last saw her. Almost a decade. And I thought it wouldn't matter anymore, that I had moved on. But the moment I saw her walking the pavement, hand in hand, with the boy he cheated on me with, his other hand occupied holding a young girl's, my heart lurched. Throwing me back to the night I found the pregnancy kit and she slapped the news right on my face.

In all these years, I have never seen or heard from her. I vaguely remember our common friends saying something about her finally marrying that man, but never anything after. I was okay, not knowing how happy she was without me, after abandoning me. But now that I have watched it, the glow on her face and the roundness of her belly—they were expecting a second baby, the caring face of the man she had chosen over me, I realized just how hurt I had been all this time.

With the hurt came something else too. A realization. She never truly loved me. If she did, she wouldn't have cheated. And if she's still with the same man, that only means she does love him.

It brought a different kind of emotion over me. Almost relieved that at least she's not hurting around others too. Maybe she was right, I was the problem. Boring, lacking...

Then there's another voice, buried deeper in my mind, speaking in a soothing voice,

'You're not boring. You're perfect in the most imperfect way. I like you so much. You're so sweet, kind and empathetic. You are so good, baby.'

I come back from the memory lane with a jolt and realize it's Syha. She still has me in her arms and is speaking softly to me. I had just spilled my guts to her, reliving the memories by telling her about them all. She listened, never once questioned. But I could tell from the way her body stiffened, she was not happy about any of it.

Who in their right mind would be happy listening to their husband's past love story?

Yet she listened, rubbing my back, entwining our fingers together, did anything to keep me grounded and preventing me from drifting away.

How did I get so lucky to have someone like her in my life? I must have done some good deeds in my past to have earned her. And here I am, wasting the time with her away by drowning in the past that hurt us both.

If Lydia's happy and moved on, why am I still lingering onto her? Especially when I have a wonderful wife to behold and cherish. I am a stupid asshole. Really.

Slowly, lifting my head up from her shoulder, I meet her eyes and she softly smiles at me. Her hand moving up to cup my face and wiping at the tear streaks on my cheek.

"I'm so glad to have you." I blurt, not wanting her to feel, even for a bit, like she's unwanted. "I know it's not easy hearing me talk about someone else, but I-I really needed to speak about it all. I'm sorry."

She shakes her head and pecks my lips, her thumb resting on my lower lip.

"I'm honored that you shared a big piece of your life with me. I'm glad too, to be here and to be able to hold you and be the person you seek comfort from." She whispers, as if scared to break the peaceful silence that has fallen over us. "I'm gonna be here as long you'll have me."

"How about forever?"

She looks a bit surprised at that, a pretty pink spreading across her face as she smiles warmly, the dimples on her cheeks making her look hundred times prettier. My heart feels too big for my body, as if about to combust from the sudden wave of emotions hitting it at once.

"Forever it is then." Her voice doesn't waver and with the confirmation gained, I lung forward and seal our lips in a heated kiss.

Syha's mouth feels warm when my tongue enters the familiar crevices, licking and sucking. Gently lowering her on the bed, I keep a firm hand on her hip and use the other to stroke her cheek, kissing her deeply and sensually. She moans in my mouth and I slightly pull back to get rid off the clothes between us.

"Wait." She suddenly stops me, making my heart race thinking she doesn't want me. "Are you sure? I don't want our first time to be something you do out of obligation of your agitated mind." There's a hint of insecurity and deemed hurt in her tone, and I hate that I'm the cause of it.

Taking her hand, I lace our fingers together and bring it up to kiss her knuckles, my eyes fixated on hers.

"Baby, this is me moving on and claiming you as mine. Forever. Only if you'll have me." I wait a second to offer her the chance to pull back or something. Instead, she does the opposite and sits up a bit, unbuttoning her shirt in the speed of light.

I follow her enthusiasm and in a few seconds, our clothes are in a heap, discarded somewhere on the floor. My mouth waters as I take in her glorious naked body, flushing and eager for me to rave and love. She blushes beautifully and touches my abs, equally awed by my body as I am with hers.

"You're gorgeous." I breathe, and she makes a low noise in the back of her throat, panting in her breaths. The sound's so hot and beautiful, it sends directs jolts to my groin.

Her petite hands touch over my chest, grazing over my nipples and I manage to hiss as she swipes her tongue over one of them, smirking while looking up at me through her dark lashes.

"Fuck." I grip the back of her head, tilting it back to claim her lips back in mine, kissing her like never before.

This time, it's actually the start of our marriage, the start of something that actually matters. That has meaning. And I'll die before I let my past ruin it for us.

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