✨ His desire ✨

Samantha

It's been three weeks since I saw him. Even though his meetings are over yet there is no sign of him. I mean how can someone be so much into himself that he barely cares about anyone else. I have settled myself in this house all alone and it has been a very short time of me being here. I'm still comfortable enough around everyone.

I spent more time with Maa as I feel really good around her. She cares for me a lot and she is actually a very sweet person. Being with her makes me feel less unwanted. That's what Abhimaan has already made me feel in these past weeks.

I mean am I that worse to not even share a call and inform about his whereabouts? No doubt, he is testing my patience to no extent. And it's hard to admit that I miss his presence around me. Not that I have spent a lot of time with him, but it's hard not to be able to look at the person who is running inside your mind like every time.

Armaan said that he has talked to Abhimaan only for once and that too is related to a business deal. And it was the day I couldn't hold onto myself anymore and asked him if his brother really asked about me and guess what? It's again, Abhimaan Malhotra's next name, Disappointment. He didn't even care about my existence.

I spent quality time with Amaira watching some series and absolutely gossiping around a makeup product. Papa is usually out for some important work so I barely got any time to spend with him. Talking about Chachu and Chachi, they are also very sweet.

And trust me, the whole family treats me so well except the one I'm married to. Right now, I'm sitting with Maa in the garden as we are having a normal chit chat, "Samantha....", she called me.

"Yes, Maa...."

She caressed my face gently before asking, "You miss him, right?"

I looked at her, my focus was more on her words yet I chose to be silent.

"Samantha, your silence is the answer I needed", she smiled softly.

"Maa, I don't want him to be the best husband for me but I just want to act as a normal human with me. Is that too much to ask for? I'm just tired. I don't know what to do. I'm just tired of....."

"Waiting", she added instantly while I nodded back.

"Then stop waiting, Samantha", I looked at her more intensely.

"Listen, Samantha. I will talk like a woman here and I know you are smarter enough to understand me, okay?", I nodded gently.

"Samantha, kabhi kabhi zindagi humein waise ghao deti hai jinko bharte bharte puri umar nikal jati hai. Aur uss haal mea rehne ki aadat si ho jati hai. Abhimaan ki zindagi bhi kuch aisi rahi hai. Usne apni maa ko khoya jisse woh sabse zyada pyar karta tha", she started saying while a drop of tears flowed down her cheeks.

"Usne kabhi uss zakhm pe marham nahi lagaya aur naa kisi ko uski madad karne di. Apne pita se nafrat kar baitha aur naa hi mujhe kabhi apnaya. Lekin Samantha, main uski maa banna kabhi chhor nahi payi kyu ki mere liye woh mera bachha hai. Aur main aaj bhi intezar kar rahi hu ki who mujhe apni zindagi mea ek choti si jagah de de."

Listening at her made me realise how true her love for Abhimaan is even though he never consider her as his mother, she loves him like her own son, "Lekin main nahi chahti ki tu iss intezar mea apni zindagi guzare. Apne sawalo ko khud ko pareshan karne mat de, Samantha. Ye tujhe andar se kha jayegi. Inke jawab dhundo beti. Saamna karo uska jo tumhare saare jawab liye baitha hai", she said clearing my head.

"If Abhimaan is the one who can give all your answers then go, Samantha. Go and confront him. I know he is scared. He has always done this. Escaping away from what he feels. Fighting against his heart. And I know the fear inside him has taken over him but you are stronger than this. What if he fails to find the light within himself?"

She continued, "You can help him, right? You can help him realize that not everybody who is closer to him will leave him one day. Give it a chance, Samantha. Stop waiting to make things worse", she said encouraging me as I wiped off my tears which I didn't know when it started flowing down my cheeks.

"Lekin, Maa...."

"Meri beti haar nahi maanti hai main janti hu. Tu kabhi haregi nahi aur agar haar bhi gayi toh main hu naa....", she said as I burst into tears while she took me in her arms.

Every emotion I was holding back since these past weeks was flowing down with every drop of tears. I can't explain how overwhelming it was for me to hear those words. I remembered my Dad used to encourage me this way whenever I felt low. And in these past weeks, I have felt low and weak at certain points. Even though I tried my best to hide it from everyone, Maa read those emotions anyways.

"Thank you, Maa.... I can't thank you enough", I sobbed in her arms.

She broke the hug after some time and faced me, "Chal jaldi jaa ab. Ziddi hai who toh tu bhi bata de usse ki tu Samrat Singh ki beti hai, Samantha Singh", she said and I nodded with teary eyes.

I got up and ran to my room, I called Ruhaan and asked him to book tickets for me and he also sent me the address of the penthouse, "I'm coming, Abhimaan Malhotra. Main bhi toh dekhu ye duniya ko darane wala aakhir kab tak khud se darr ke baitha rahega?", I smiled at myself. I got ready into a casual shirt with comfortable pants on it. I applied a little bit of makeup and wore my watch, completing my look by wearing casual footwear. I took my phone and my cards and put them inside a small sling bag.

After a few hours, I took my flight and finally reached Pune. Until I reached there, it was almost dark in the evening. I booked a cab and asked the driver to drop me at the address which Ruhaan sent me.

After a few minutes, I was standing in front of a big penthouse. It was not as big as his mansion yet it was beautiful and luxurious. I paid the cab driver and marched inside the gate. Uncountable thoughts were rushing inside my head and the most disturbing was 'What would his reaction be after seeing me? Will he still act cold? Will he be happy?'

God, just help me with this.

With every single step I was taking towards the house, there was a marathon going inside my body. My heart was a clear winner yet every inch of my body was trembling. I looked around the weather and the sky was cloudy. It felt like it could rain anytime soon. The wind was blowing a little fast, the cold air touching my face and even making my covered hands shiver for a moment.

The clouds started gathering around as lightning easily struck from the edge of the thunderstorm. Before knocking on the door, I felt my heart pounding louder and I did my best to calm down myself.

I raised my hand to knock on the door when it slid to open with a slight push. "The door is already open, so careless of him", I rolled my eyes as I entered inside.

I looked around the lavish yet simple interiors of the house. The interiors were minimal and it felt more like a home from inside. Everything was super clean and kept in its right place. A big couch was placed in the centre of the hall and there were few paintings to add extra remarks to the interiors.

Anyone who knows Abhimaan would know that it's his place and no doubt it actually has a peaceful environment which is quite soothing. I moved ahead exploring the paintings when a soft voice rang in my ears, "C'mon, Abhimaan. You liked it anyways....."

My heart raced faster as I moved forward, I chased the voice and turned around only to find him standing in front of a girl, whose arms were around his shoulders.

"Ishaaa......", he voiced out making an echo inside my ears.

My body went numb yet my eyes reciprocated well, the tears already started pooling inside my eyes. I fisted the hem of my shirt to suppress the pain from the stab I felt in my chest.

My sobs became heavy when he looked up at me. I stared at him with nothing but immense pain inside me while he gazed at me in surprise? Shock? You can name it.

I gulped the lump in my throat while my body fumed in anger. A rage I never felt before but was enough for me to ruin the face of whoever steps ahead in my direction, "Oh, hi Miss? I have seen you somewhere... ummm...?", the girl came to me while tapping her fingers on her chin.

Don't tell me I have to ruin her face.

Would I do that?

To some extent, No.

Would I mind doing that?

The same answer, No.

"Of course, you are Samantha, right? Abhimaan Malhotra's wife", she said giving an extra effort to the word 'wife.'

I ignored her words the way I did it with her existence. "I have seen her somewhere", my subconscious said.

"Wait, she is Isha Chauhan, the model."

The same girl who has been rumoured to have an affair with my husband. "I think I should take my leave now", she said before I could react to anything further and smirk back at me, she existed.

Once she left, my focus shifted back to him,"Samantha, it's not what you think. Trust me", the first thing came out of his mouth.

"Samantha....", he voiced out, taking a step into my direction when I stepped back.

"Don't you dare, Mr. Malhotra", I said, pointing fingers at him.

Suddenly the place which was giving me a homey vibes a few minutes back was haunting me. The walls mocked me and the decor showed pity to me.

"Don't you dare come near me", I said, before I rushed out while I heard his steps following me. Once I headed out, I felt that I had already dropped my bag inside but I barely cared about it anymore. I just needed to be as far away from him.

"Samantha, please....", I faster the speed of my heels. If I'm going to look back at him right now, I'm going to cry. And even on my last day, I would barely want anyone's sympathetic eyes to me.

I marched faster when I felt his hands on my wrist as he turned me around to face him, "Samantha, listen to me. It's not what you think", he said with more seriousness in his tone while I tried getting rid of his hold.

"I don't need your explanation, Mr. Malhotra. Let go of me....", I was fuming in anger yet I was more hurt.

I don't know why, it just felt too wrong watching him with someone else.

"She was just here for some paperwork", he said when I stopped protesting and looked at him straight into his eyes.

No one has ever hit my nerves like this before, the way he and his words are doing it right now, "Paperwork? So, this is the way the billionaire, Abhimaan Malhotra does his paperwork, right?", fine, I'm not the only one who starts crying while expressing anger.

"I like your professionalism, Mr. Malhotra", I felt his hold on me tightened.

"Samantha, I told you I don't have anything to do with her or any other woman. Trust me for once. I asked my assistant to send me the papers. It needed my signatures but she brought those papers here. I signed it and asked her to leave but she pulled that thing with me. I was about to push her when you came", he blurted out but I barely wanted to care about it.

"Do whatever you want. I was the fool to come here. Just let me go, Mr. Malhotra", I struggled back but he was too stubborn to leave me.

"I said let me go, Mr. Malhotra. Leave me....", my anger became a request by now.

I was just feeling too much.

"Not until you listen to me", he said unaffectedly.

"You already have people around to listen to you. I see myself of no use in your life. So, you better let me go, Mr. Malhotra", I said bluntly when I felt my face getting wet and I realised it already started raining.

"No matter who is around me, I still want you, Samantha", he said, pulling me closer to me. Even though I wanted to ignore everything he was saying at the moment, my ears still heard those words.

Water droplets flowing down his face as his damp strands of hair weigh down his forehead. I felt our proximity and it was more than closer considering us being drenched in rain from tip to toe by now. Even though the thunderstorm intervened, our heartbeats played in sync.

"If so, then why did you leave me on the day of our marriage? Why the hell did you escape like a coward?", I was outraged with the feelings I was holding back with the past few weeks.

His face hung down as his eyes softened, "Because I didn't have any options, Samantha", he said slowly.

I squinted my eyes, "I know you never wanted this marriage nor did I expect anything from you, Abhimaan. But your actions gave me hope. I trusted you. I started having hopes from you and you crushed it down in just one go. You just walked off, Abhimaan. You just walked off....", I cried out.

"Tell me, Abhimaan. What did I do wrong to you? Just tell me, huh? Just say it aloud. Am I too worthless and don't even deserve to have a normal conversation with you? Who doesn't even deserve to know your whereabouts? Am I too low for you that you can't even act like a normal human to me?", I tapped on his chest with a slight push while he kept holding onto me.

"Don't say that, Samantha", he said sternly.

"I will say whatever I want, Mr. Malhotra. Why is it even bothering you now?", I pushed him again when his hold on me loosened.

His white shirt was soaked in the rain by now while my shirt wasn't that covering which I barely cared about at that moment. I just wanted to blurt out whatever he has made me feel, "You don't have any right to say about yourself like that, Samantha", he repeated.

Ignoring his words, I continued, "Mr. Malhotra, I'm not rich like you. I don't hold this aura and everything you have."

"I said stop, Samantha."

"You are a billionaire and I'm just a normal girl, right? And now you are just bound to me in this marriage....", I added, I was crying miserably by now.

It was so hurtful to give words to the feelings I have been going through these days.

I saw him clenching his fist as his jaw tightened but that can't stop me from blurting out whatever I feel like, "In fact, the woman just drools over you. And I'm nothing as compared to themmm....", I sobbed but couldn't finish my words when I felt his hands looping around me as he took me into his arms and landed on my lips.

The outrageous anger flew down not with the droplets of the rain soaking into our skin but with the wetness I felt on my lips. He didn't move neither did I, we were just standing there in the middle of his garden, drenched in rain and resting our lips on each other.

"I warned you already, Samantha", he whispered slowly, resting his forehead to mine while I breathed heavily.

"I escaped because I was afraid", he added when I looked at him with innocent eyes.

"And you know who scared me off, Samantha?", he asked back and I was still sobbing.

His lips turned into a soft smile when he said this, "You. It's you, Samantha. You scared me. I'm scared of you. I'm scared of everything you are doing to me. I'm scared of everything you are capable of doing to me", he continued as my heart melted away with every word he was saying.

"Yes, I never wanted this marriage, Samantha. I never wanted you or anyone else. But the moment I see you, every inch of my body wants me to make you mine. Every nerves of my body urges you to be around you. To look at you. To look at your smile, to cherish your presence. To worship your beauty."

I sobbed more heavily after hearing his words, "But I was wrong, Samantha. I'm sorry that I left you like this. I'm sorry for the pain I have caused you. The more I try to stay away from you, the more you are captivating my mind."

"And you know what, Samantha?", he laughed slightly while I kept looking at his wet face.

"You have become a desire to me, Samantha. A desire. A desire I never wanted. A desire I never thought I would be needing until I met you. You have become my "Unwanted Desire", he completed when my emotions started turning into my vulnerability.

His words started doing something I never felt before. I was breaking down with every word yet I wanted him to fix me.

"Abhimaan....", I clutched onto his shirt more tightly before he landed on my lips again. In the seconds, I realised he wasn't just resting his lips at mine this time. He was kissing me passionately.

Our lips started syncing to each other the moment I matched up with his pace. I kissed him with everything I was holding back. I kissed him like it was my last day. I kissed him as I was lacking oxygen and needed his to be back to this life. I kissed him with the butterflies I had inside my stomach. I kissed him with the vulnerable mess I have become by now. I wasn't just reciprocating his kiss but I was exploring the way he played with my tongue.

And the kiss out of need became our desire when he started running his hands over my shirt which was already soaked in rain. His hands did magic to me when I started feeling a tingling sensation in between my legs.

He broke the kiss and before I could realise that I needed more of him, he already picked me up in his arms and took me inside his penthouse. He put me down, locking the door behind him as my heart already raced in a marathon.

Before I could reciprocate further, he pinned me to the nearest wall and started kissing me again. I looped my hands around his neck and started pulling him closer to me even if there was a little space left between us. This time, he kissed me more fiercely and with more hunger and it felt nothing less than magic.

The way his tongue played with mine and mine didn't bother to explore his, the way he made me lost in his charms and him kissing me felt like a dream.

In between all these, I realised that the Abhimaan Malhotra who barely focuses on what he feels has today confessed every detail of what he feels about me.

And that is no less than a peace to my chaos.

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