Chp. 5

After laying out my past relationship with Drew we had talked about a lot of insignificant things, which I was okay with considering one major topic was all I could handle within a few hours. I loved talking to Drew though, it was so easy and natural and everything I had been dying to find in a person. I was so happy I had run into her, I was so happy that we had met, but I wasn’t happy about the fact that in just two days her and my sister would step into a ring together.

The thought literally made me sick.

It seemed as if this week was passing fast just to make Friday get her faster, as if the universe kind of knew I didn’t want it to come and it was torturing me on purpose. I was terrified, not only for my sister but for Drew too, and that put me in a really bad emotional situation.

Drew still didn’t know I knew about her fighting, and Jada still didn’t know I was hanging out with her enemy behind her back. I’m sure it wouldn’t be a big deal right now, or maybe it would, but if Jada lost to Drew… I knew it would be ten times worse.

Knowing my sister I knew she could hold a grudge, and I understood that this fight was extremely important to her. If she didn’t win it would set her professional career back. I knew she wanted out of this league she was in, I knew she wanted to win with everything in her, but I could help but shake the thought of what if.

If Jada was doing this then I knew Drew had the same stipulations, and she also had to win so many fights before getting out. I wanted to know how many but that would obviously involve me actually talking to her about it. That didn’t seem likely because knowing Drew she wouldn’t open up to me about something like that.  Not unless she had a damn good reason, like her actually seeing me there in the flesh, which was likely come Friday night.

Tuesday after rehearsal I had almost brought it up whenever Drew had brought me home but I had chickened out, and now that it was Wednesday night and I was starting to grow anxious. What if I showed up and she saw me and freaked out? Was it a bad idea to go in the first place?

No, I couldn’t bail, Jada was relying on me and supporting her was something a good sister would do, no matter how scary it was.

Then I got another text from Drew, “I got you a surprise.”

I felt something in my heart flutter, curiosity swarming all around my brain as I typed, “Could you give me a hint?”

“It’s something you need, most definitely.”

I smiled at the vague answer, knowing she didn’t want to give much away. I literally had no idea what it could be considering I didn’t know exactly what I needed, so how would Drew even know?

I typed, “That’s honestly the worst hint ever.”

As I lied in bed texting Drew before disappearing off to sleep I found myself wanting to stay awake just to talk to her. I enjoyed conversation with her, and now that we were getting closer she was actually starting to flirt with me a lot more. I still didn’t know where exactly her interests lied when it came to sexual preference but I was pretty convinced she at least liked me, so that had to mean something.

My phone vibrated, “I know but I’m afraid if I say anymore you’ll guess it, then it won’t be a surprise.”

I smiled involuntarily, knowing that it was getting late and I would have to end the conversation. My eyes were growing heavy, and I knew I would see her tomorrow before and after rehearsal, so saying goodbye wasn’t too hard.

“Well, then I can’t wait to see it… I’m going to sleep. See you tomorrow.”

She responded quickly, “Good night Bree.”

I texted her back and put my phone up, staring up at my ceiling fan and wondering what the hell Drew had planned up her sleeve. I had to admit though, it was flattering knowing she had gotten me something out of the kindness of her heart.

I turned over, images of Drew and Saturday night flooding my memory. I couldn’t stop thinking how amazing she looked and how sweet and understanding she had been towards me. I knew that those kinds of people were extremely rare, and when you found one you should hold onto them as long as possible… but I still had that demon of doubt. I was still worried about the whole fighting thing, and I knew Drew had some type of damage hidden somewhere within her, I just had no idea what.

And that scared me, because what if she never opened up about it?

What if it was that bad?

I began to doze off eventually, grateful that I wouldn’t be able to think myself to death anymore. I allowed sleep to overtake me, and my last thought before falling into the black was of course Drew herself.

~ ~ ~ ~

“You’re early.”

I watched Drew stand from the front desk and my heart slammed in my chest like always. She seemed different today, more confident and… sexy. I didn’t know how to explain it but I could feel it about her, and as she walked over to me I couldn’t help but stare in awe.

But I responded regardless, “Uh yea, just wanted to get a chance to talk to you before and hopefully get a peek at my surprise.”

She smirked playfully, “You won’t, it’s for later, but nice try.”

I could hear the flirtation in her voice, and I couldn’t help but notice she had put a little more effort into her appearance today. Her hair was actually down, her loose blonde waves falling over her shoulders and she actually had eyeliner and mascara on. She didn’t really need it considering she had long lashes and illuminating eyes but, it was a good look on her.

Shit, anything looked good on her but that’s not the point.

She led me to the studio and unlocked it, letting us both in as I dropped my dance bag. I turned to her, “What if I told you I don’t like surprises?”

She shrugged, “You’d have to make an exception for me.”

We were closer than usual but that wasn’t what was making me nervous, it was the way Drew was looking at me. It was the way her eyes seemed to be glued to me, and it was kind of turning me on.

She was casually leaning on the doorframe like she usually did, her arms crossed as she stared at me, causing the blood to rise to the surface of my skin.

I wanted to ask her about what she was doing tomorrow night to see what she would say. I knew where she would be, and I also knew somewhere deep down she wouldn’t tell me the truth, but I was curious as to how she would handle the situation.

I walked closer to her, smiling, “So what are you doing tomorrow night?”

I watched something in her clam up, as if she hadn’t expected me to ask that or something. I mean she should’ve figured something right? We had been hanging out for a while now, it was bound to happen.

She regained herself and shook her head, “Just going out of town, why?”

So she would lie. I shook my head, trying not to seem as if I knew otherwise, “I wanted to see if you’d want to come over to watch movies and drink my wine.”

I could see something in her tear, as if she really wanted to but knew she couldn’t, at least not Friday. She scratched the back of her neck in nervousness like she always did, “Uh well, I might be gone the entire weekend. It just depends on how Friday night goes…”

Meaning it depends on how beat up you get…

I nodded, feeling a tiny ache in my chest knowing I probably wouldn’t see her at all this weekend. If anything I would see her next Tuesday, which would be five entire days from now, which honestly sucked. Yet there was nothing I could do about it.

I could tell this conversation had made her uncomfortable so I decided to change the subject for her sake. I knew I shouldn’t pry but it was hard, she was just so mysterious and closed off about all the good stuff… I was starting to wonder if I was just wasting my time with her.

But it didn’t feel like I was wasting my time.

I attempted to change the subject as I asked, “You know, I never got to ask you Saturday but when is the last time you’ve been out on a date?

She smirked, “Um, last Friday I think. Remember when I brought you eat?”

I rolled my eyes, laughing as I shoved her, “Before me, Drew.”

She seemed to have to think about it, as if it had really been a long time for her. The thought saddened me simply because I figured Drew would’ve had people lining up to try and date her, but her hard exterior did scare people away.

She looked down at her hands that were currently picking at the skin around her fingernails, which I pinned to be just another nervous habit of hers. She seemed to have a lot of them, but it didn’t stop her from answering my question.

“High school.”

I could feel something with me shiver in pain for her, knowing that it had been at least over five years ago. Was it really that hard for her to open up to people? Or was it because of other things that I wasn’t aware of?

I decided to joke instead of become serious, “So you’re really picky.”

She laughed, loosening up as she shrugged, “It’s not that… it’s just, it’s weird. I’m weird…”

I shook my head, walking closer to her, “You’re really not weird for picking and choosing.”

We were extremely close now and I she seemed to grow a little nervous. I had known Drew for nearly three weeks and I was already dying to kiss her, but I was too afraid to make the first move and push Drew away for good.

She spoke, my eyes locked on her lips the entire time, “It’s not that I pick and choose… it’s… it’s just that, okay maybe I am picky? I don’t know how to explain it without sounding weird.”

God she was so close to opening up. I let my eyes take her in, holding her stare as I smiled reassuringly, “I mean I literally told you how stupid I was over my ex, the last thing I’m going to think is that you’re weird.”

She smiled adorably, the redness in her cheeks becoming apparent in this very moment. I could tell she was having a hard time but that she wanted to open up, she was just trying to find the strength. She knew she could trust me, which scared her because it was so foreign, but the matter of the fact was that she was trying, and that was the most adorable thing ever.

“It’s not that I’m picky, it’s because… well, I just don’t feel anything. There’s been plenty of people but… I feel nothing. There’s no interest, no spark, there’s absolutely nothing, and that’s why it’s been so long. Don’t ask me to explain that because I literally can’t.”

I shook my head at her answer, almost feeling regret for asking, “You don’t have to explain anything if you don’t want.”

She shrugged it off, as if she was trying to make it seem as if it wasn’t a big deal but I knew it was to her. She had probably felt so lonely for the longest time because of whatever she wasn’t feeling. She probably felt like she was abnormal, which it kind of was but it wasn’t her fault.

Although she seemed comfortable in her own skin and who she was, and even though it was difficult for her to talk about this didn’t seem like something she was trying to hide. She stood from the doorframe, causing something in me to jump in excitement. I don’t know why but a part of me had momentarily thought she was going to embrace me somehow, but I dismissed that idea immediately as someone walked in behind Drew.

And sadly it was Jordi.

Drew looked at me, taking this as her queue to leave even though I really just wanted her to stay, especially now that Jordi was here. She smiled politely, “I’ll leave you to it.”

I nodded, deciding it was time to start preparing to dance as I pulled my long brown hair into a pony-tail. Jordi dropped his bag and spoke, “Sorry if I interrupted something, it kind of sounded serious.”

I mean had he been listening or what?

I shrugged it off, realizing it was kind of was serious but it wasn’t a big deal. I slipped off my sweats and jacket, revealing my practice attire as I responded, “It’s fine.”

More people began filing into the studio, relief overtaking me as it was no longer just me and Jordi here. I knew once everyone showed up practice would begin and I was excited because everything was looking good. I was ready to start on our second set which would thankfully only involve the girls of the group, so the guys had a few weeks off.

Maria walked in then, walking up to me and whispering, “Drew’s looking awfully cute today…”

I shoved her playfully, laughing, “Shut up and go get ready to dance, Maria.”

~ ~ ~ ~

Rehearsal passed fairly quickly, which I was kind of upset about because that meant tomorrow was coming and I was pretty sure I wasn’t prepared. I wasn’t sure if I was ready to witness my sister and Drew fighting each other, and I wasn’t sure if I could handle seeing one of them actually losing. I was terrified, but I was stuck in the situation with no way to escape.

We were running through the number one last time before I called it a night, and everything seemed to go fairly smooth. I knew once the week of the dance recital came everything would be getting pretty hectic, which was something I wasn’t looking forward to. I hated dress rehearsal but it was necessary, and we all would have to suffer through it.

We finished the dance and I called out, “Great job, see you guys Saturday.”

We all began packing up as I turned off the stereo system, wishing I didn’t have to go home and end the day. I was dreading what was to come but there was no stopping it.

It didn’t take long for everyone to file out and for Drew to appear at the door like she always did, smiling at me from afar. I bit my lip out of nervousness as I slipped on my sweats and jacket, eager to ride home with her again tonight.

I stated, “You know we never really got to finish our discussion.”

She smirked, locking the door behind us as we walked out of the studio, “I didn’t think it was that interesting.”

I laughed slightly, “I mean I think you’re interesting…”

She glanced at me as we walked down the stairs of the gym, hoping she would accept my compliment. She nodded, “I’m glad you think so.”

We walked up to the front desk before leaving, where she pulled out her black bag along with a second helmet. It was candy red, which I loved by the way, and she handed it to me, “Surprise.”

I laughed to myself, not really believing she had gotten me a helmet. I looked at her, “Drew, you honestly didn’t have to.”

She nodded, laughing, “I kind of did, what I was doing was dangerous and illegal so… you’re welcome.”

“Thank you, it’s pretty,” I held the helmet, wondering how much it had cost, “How much do I owe you?”

She shrugged, “Don’t worry about it.”

I pressed, “No seriously, I’m not letting you pay for this.”

A cute smirk plastered her face as she answered, “I kind of already did.”

I shoved her, smiling, “Drew tell me!”

She opened the door for us and shook her head, “Not gonna happen Breanna.”

I narrowed my eyes at her but I couldn’t argue, even though I really wanted to. I hated when other people bought me things but I knew why she had, not because it as an actual gift but because it really was for a good reason.

I sighed, “Well, I love it.”

She winked, “I know.”

I smiled, continuing what I had initially been saying, “So back to what I was saying…”

She teased, “I was hoping you’d forget about it.”

I shook my head, “Nope. So since you don’t feel anything with anyone and don’t give them the time of day… does that mean you like me more than average?”

Her amazing eyes took me in as she opened the door for me, “I guess you can say that. I mean I did buy you a helmet so you can continue riding with me.”

I blushed slightly, “What makes me so different than the rest?”

We walked up to her bike that was alone in the tiny parking lot of the gym, allowing me to read her expression. I didn’t understand why Drew was so closed off about her feelings but I was willing to be patient, even though being patient actually wasn’t something I practiced often. I was so used to getting things done quickly, refusing to slow down for anyone but when I had met Drew that had all changed.

I found myself taking my time with her, getting to know her, attempting to understand all aspects that she had to offer. She fascinated me, and I almost envied how intelligent and beautiful she really was, which seemed like a good enough reason to dig deeper.

She slipped on her helmet and responded, “I actually feel something when I’m with you.”

I felt something in my heart flutter, scaring me and flattering me at the same time. Drew Wilder, this hard badass chick that beat people up and drove a motorcycle felt something for me, which was hard to believe. Although, she seemed to be being completely honest with me, and I knew this because the sentence was a struggle to get out which meant it wasn’t something she admitted often.

I slipped on my brand new helmet just like her, “That is a good thing, right?”

I could see happiness but darkness in her eyes, as if she really was torn over this whole situation between me and her. I was torn too, but probably for different reasons considering the whole “you’re about to fight my sister tomorrow” situation. I didn’t know why she looked so torn though, and she responded, “It’s kind of good, kind of bad I think.”

She climbed onto her bike then, letting the conversation die as she kicked her bike to life. What exactly did she mean by that? Was she warning me? Why was she being so mysterious when it came to something like this?

Then I figured she was probably referring to the fact that she was pretty dangerous, but she could control beating someone up, right? Was she talking about her past and how it had secretly messed her up? I just wished she would open up to me so I could understand goddammit.

I wrapped my arms around her and spoke, “I feel safer already.”

She turned her head and responded, “And you look super cute too.”

Then she took off, my arms instinctively tightening around her as I felt my face redden from her compliment. She was just so fucking cute but so dangerous at the same time, and a part of me knew I should be running in the opposite direction but I couldn’t. I was hooked on her, like her attention was a drug and I was already addicted, which was something that really worried me.

It was dangerous how much I already liked her and it hadn’t even been a month since we had met.

I had a gut feeling we both knew this, but neither one of us knew how to handle it. I didn’t want to distance myself, and I don’t think I could if I tried considering she worked at the gym I rehearsed at. There was just something so different between us, and even though I couldn’t put my finger on it I knew we could both feel it.

It was scary but it was nice in the same sense, which were two things that could end up bad and we both knew that.

We were soon pulling up to my apartment, regret taking over as I looked at Drew while we both took off our helmets.  I didn’t want this night to end, and I was terrified for tomorrow night and the reality of it was finally starting to kick in.

She smiled sadly, “I feel bad for declining your offer to hang out.”

I waved my hand, already knowing why she had, “Don’t worry about it, you’re busy.”

She looked down at her hands that were resting on top of her helmet and nodded, “Yea, I guess so.”

I could tell she wanted to be honest but really couldn’t, and I understand why she didn’t want to be. I knew what her and my sister were involved in was illegal and dangerous, and it wasn’t something you went around telling everyone. They could get into serious trouble and I had to understand that, and that was probably reason she wasn’t opening up to me about it.

I sighed, “Well, text me if you decide you want to?”

Her eyes switched from my lips back to my eyes, causing something in my stomach to tingle. I could tell she was having a hard time lying to me but I would simply act like I wasn’t seeing any of it. Not to mention that she looked super adorable right now and I just wanted to pull her face into mine, but that wasn’t anything new.

She nodded, “I’ll see.”

I mumbled, “Good night Drew.”

She sighed heavily, “Have a good weekend Bree.”

I turned back to her, “You too Drew.”

Then she left, allowing me to wonder and worry myself to death over tomorrow night for the rest of the night.

~ ~ ~ ~

The nerves were kicking in as we turned down the dark street, my sister sitting silently next to me in the back of Mike’s SUV. I was glad that her boyfriend was here considering I had absolutely no interest in driving after this thing was all said and done. I honestly had second thoughts before leaving, but here I was on my way with Jada to fight Drew.

I didn’t want this to happen but I knew this situation was completely out of my hands, and maybe that’s why I hated it so much. Someone was going to get hurt and I had no way to stop it because it was either going to be my own sister or Drew.

The fact that this was no big deal to Jada annoyed me, and I knew she looked at it like it was just paid practice no matter if it was illegal or not.

Professional fighting wasn’t something I was a fan of, not now or ever, but knowing my sister wanted to do this made me nervous. I knew there were guidelines and shit for the fighter’s safety but it didn’t mean that she couldn’t get hurt. I just never saw the point I guess, I never saw the point in fighting. Fighting for what? Money? Reputation? Just because you wanted to knock the shit out of someone legally?

Except in Jada and Drew’s case it wasn’t even legal, and not only were they involved with it but now apparently so was I.

We pulled up to the place and my heart immediately started slamming against my chest. I didn’t want to go in there, I didn’t want her to go through with this but I knew there was no turning back now.

We walked inside, going down the stairs the same way we had last time as we made it into the familiar large-sized room that held the ring. The music was loud, hyping up the crowd that was drinking and having a good time while I was here nearly hyperventilating.

I felt a hand on my shoulder, looking into Jada’s eyes, “You’ll be okay, right?”

I looked down momentarily and then nodded stiffly, “Yea, I’ll see you after. Good luck.”

She smirked, “I’ll be fine, Bree.”

I felt my heart drop at that, wishing she wouldn’t get a big head like she always did. My sister had always been overly-confident, and in some cases that was okay, but not this time. She needed to be wary, she needed to be cautious when fighting, not thinking she didn’t need to be because she was too good.

Usually that only led to her own fallout.

I walked around the place, grabbing a drink in the process as I found a seat, hoping no one approached me. I honestly got a horrible vibe here and I wanted the fight to start already and get it over with, like ripping a band aid off of a wound. The anticipation was the worst part because I didn’t know what was going to happen or who was going to come out on top, and I wasn’t sure who I wanted to come out on top in the first place.

I listened to the two men besides me, “Wilder stands no chance against Kelly, Drew’s still an amateur compared to Jada.”

The other one retorted, “Yea but Drew has the best reflexes I’ve seen to date though, I think she’s gonna give Jada a wake-up call.”

Oh God I was going to throw up…

Hearing this only made me regret coming even more, wondering when the hell this fight was going to start. I was so nervous I thought I was going to puke all over myself, my heart racing and my stomach falling like I was on a consistent downfall. Then suddenly the lights dimmed as the announcer came over the speaker, “Ladies and gents, betting is closed for tonight, and I hope you all are ready for a fight to remember!”

I heard cheering and hollering erupt through the crowd as I tried to hold myself together. I was so nervous and terrified but I was just grateful Drew and Jada were the first fight of the night, that way we could leave as soon as possible.

“Now let’s welcome to the ring our undefeated champion, Jada Kelly!”

The cheers were deafening as I asked myself, Undefeated champion?

I watched as Jada ran onto the ring, running the perimeter as she hyped up the crowd and got her blood pumping. My heart felt as if it was about to explode as I watched her point to me and give me a thumbs up, only making me more nervous than I already was.

So Jada was undefeated, something she had forgotten to mention whenever she had initially revealed this big secret. That had to mean she was good, like extremely good, which also gave me the sad realization that Drew probably wasn’t going to come out of this one okay like she had last time.

Then the announcer spoke once more, “And now let’s welcome our upcoming opponent, Drew Wilder!”

The cheers weren’t as loud as Jada’s but it was still apparent Drew had a backing, and I couldn’t help but feel my heart jump at the sight of her. She seemed so calm and collected when she ran onto the ring, still looking as if she wasn’t in the same place as the rest of us. She was focused, her eyes only falling onto my sister as she jumped on her toes and loosened up her body.

Oh God please let this be okay…

Jada and Drew were about the same size in comparison, same build except Drew was just slightly taller but not by much. Both of them eyed each other as my sister threw her arms out, stretching a bit in the process as I felt my own heart stretching in fear. It was taking everything I had to sit here and watch this, knowing this was going to either end really fast or get extremely ugly. I wasn’t sure which one I wanted.

“Let the fight begin!”

The bell rang out and the two girls immediately went into defense mode, dancing around the ring as they carefully watched each other. Knowing my sister was undefeated only made me wonder how the hell Drew was going to come out of this alive. If Jada was undefeated then that meant she had beaten every single one of her opponents, but she had never fought Drew so this was foreign to her.

My sister wasted no time, moving in quickly as her feet continued to balance her while Drew took defense, attempting to read Jada’s oncoming attack. My heart slammed against my chest, seeing Jada’s wrapped fist fly towards Drew, but Drew gratefully predicted as she threw her hands up to block.

I was holding my breath watching them, as if I couldn’t even blink because I was a deer in the headlights or something. I hated being here, and I hated everything about this situation.

I watched as Drew wrapped her arms around Jada’s shoulders, causing Jada to lose her balance. I watched as they tumbled to the ground, Drew falling on top but Jada wasn’t letting this hinder her attack. Her legs quickly wrapped against one of Drew’s legs all while Drew was still holding Jada around her neck, attempting to control the situation.

Watching the struggle was actually pretty exhausting, and I could tell my sister struggling under Drew while Drew held control on top. I didn’t understand this part, knowing that one of the two would eventually get the other in some kind of head lock or something but the cheers led me to believe someone was doing something right.

Then Drew lifted one hand and delivered a blow to Jada’s head, but it wasn’t enough to stop my sister from releasing herself and kicking Drew in the stomach.

Drew wasted no time, ignoring the blow to her gut as she moved in for Jada once more and climbing on top again, desperately trying to gain control and get some damage done. It felt as if an hour had passed watching them but I knew it had really only been a few minutes.

Then as if everything happened in slow motion I watched my sister slip out from under Drew, wrapping her legs around Drew and causing her to lose her balance. Drew fell, Jada quickly gaining control as I watched in complete horror. I couldn’t peel my eyes away as my sister delivered multiple quick jabs to Drew’s precious face, allowing me to hear the impacts of her concrete fists.

I closed my eyes for a split second, knowing that Drew had most likely lost but when I opened my eyes the cheering erupted, Drew managing to get my sister in an arm-lock of some sort.

Then the bell rang and they were pulled apart.

Jada stood on the other side, facing towards me as I saw the redness and swelling under one of her eyes. She was panting, her chest rising and falling quickly as Drew’s back faced me, not allowing me to see her face and how bad her damage was. I was actually terrified to see her face but all I could see was the back of her head.

They rested for a minute, my eyes studying the contours of Drew’s back again. I was terrified to continue watching this, and even though I was taking a liking to Drew I wanted my sister to win. If she won it would be less of a worry for my life. If Jada won I wouldn’t have to worry so much anymore, and the only one I really would have to worry about was Drew.

But what if Drew won instead of Jada? What would that mean?

The second bell rang, pulling me out of my trance immediately. I watched as they danced a little more than before, Jada looking worn out already from the previous round. Drew charged, her feet carrying her swiftly towards my sister. Jada tried to read Drew but we had both seen Drew fight, and I knew she was nearly unpredictable. Jada sent a jab but Drew had read it, dodging it and charging quickly, slamming my sister against the fence of the ring as she tried to counter a defense.

They were battling fiercely this time, almost manically as Drew twisted in my sister’s arms, knocking Jada’s feet out from under her. They fell together, Jada once again falling under Drew but this time Drew wasn’t getting into the situation she had before with my sister.

Pressing Jada’s back against the fence I watched in horror as Drew quickly delivered exactly three punches to Jada’s face, my sister’s head rebounding off of Drew’s hands. I heard the impacts clearly, causing everything in my body to cringe in horror. I immediately understood why I had originally not wanted to come tonight, and I couldn’t peel my eyes off of my sister, whose consciousness was digressing rapidly.

Drew wasn’t the sweet and quiet girl I knew at the gym, and she wasn’t mysterious and sympathetic. There was a part of her that was an animal, someone who was in a completely different state of mind that seemed to be out to get blood on her hands.

She was honestly terrifying, and in this moment I was reevaluating everything I had learned about Drew.

Jada attempted to gain control again, wrapping her legs around Drew and throwing her off of her, giving Jada a second chance to restore some of her energy. I knew the fight was coming to an end as Drew regained her composure quickly and pulled Jada into her. I watched as my sister desperately tried to block Drew’s next attack but it was no use, she was exhausted, almost blinded by the blood on her face.

I watched as Drew quickly provided her killer blow to Jada’s face, hitting her hard enough to finally finish this fight as Jada went limp to the ground. The cheering sent screams of horror through my ears, knowing my sister had lost against Drew as she lied unconscious for a split second on the ground. Drew stood, heading to the exit as she limped in pain. I could tell she wasn’t happy when she turned to walk off the ring but I finally was able to get a good look at her.

Her face was bloody, one of her eyebrows split as I looked into those dark eyes that were focused on nothing but the exit of the ring. She was someone else, and she wasn’t the Drew I knew. I felt myself standing as I tried to peel my eyes off of Drew but I couldn’t as I watched her disappear into the back room. I tried to follow, fear and disgust taking over but was stopped by a large man before I made it anywhere near the back of the building. Everything seemed to be happening in slow motion as he spoke, “You can’t go back there, ma’am.”

I regained my head and pointed to my sister that was being shuffled off of the ring, “That’s my sister, Jada.”

This got him to let me through as I rushed towards Jada instead of towards Drew, not knowing what to think of this situation. I felt mad, and I felt all kinds of emotions that were confusing and were really managing to wear me thin. I wanted to fight Drew for doing that to Jada and then I wanted to hate Jada for busting up Drew’s face. I was angry, and as I made it to where Jada was sitting I couldn’t help but want to scream and yell like a five year old.

I wanted to argue, I wanted to hate everyone, and most of all I just wanted to leave. I knew throwing a tantrum like a child wouldn’t help Jada’s situation though, so I sat quietly next to her while I tried not to look at her busted face.

Jada was being fixed up, a towel wiping the blood off of her face as her boyfriend looked at me, “We’re going to leave as soon as Jada gets fixed up and examined.”

I realized instantly that this wasn’t the time to be thinking like this even though I couldn’t really help it. I was upset because looking at Jada I just couldn’t believe she wanted to do this to herself. I was upset at Drew for doing it, I was upset over everything in this situation and I still couldn’t do anything about it.

Jada looked at me, her right eye swollen shut, “Looks like I should’ve taken your good luck after all.”

I wanted to find humor in her comment but I couldn’t as I watched her press an ice bag against her face to dull the swelling. I was so torn that I felt as if I was going to be ripped in half, not knowing how to handle something like this. I hadn’t been prepared mentally to witness what I just did but now I was here, stuck with the agonizing image in my brain of Drew and Jada demolishing each other.

I just wanted to go home and sleep it off, but I was stuck here while Jada got checked out. Then I inevitably found myself thinking about Drew and if she was okay, even after completely fucking up my sister and taking her championship title. Jada wasn’t out of the race yet, all thanks to Drew, and a part of me was actually pretty upset at Drew. I was a ball of emotions and I didn’t know how to handle them.

Everything was just so fucked and I had no idea what to do about it.

Then Mike glanced at me, handing me the keys, “Go get the car will you? We shouldn’t be too much longer.”

I took the keys almost in a daze as I made it out of the backroom, wishing I hadn’t stepped foot into this place tonight. I honestly regretted coming, and knowing that Drew had put my sister in a situation to where she wasn’t free quite yet angered me. I knew it wasn’t her fault, and that was basically the entire point of this thing. You were to fight and win, and if you didn’t win you fought until you did, or until you got so injured that you literally couldn’t anymore.

It was disgusting and I hated everything about it.

I hated both Drew and my sister at this moment, I hated how my sister was involved and had introduced me, and I hated how Drew of course had to be involved as well. I was angry, and I didn’t even know what I was going to do come Tuesday when I would most likely see Drew.

I found myself actually not wanting to see her, which was a really shitty feeling.

I finally made it to the car, climbing in and cranking it to life. I drove it towards the back of the building where I figured there would be a door of some sort to usher Jada out and onto the street. I was so ready to go home it was ridiculous, and I had plenty to sit and think about.

I parked under the overhang, looking up at the sky that seemed ready to burst with rain. It was colder than before the fight which meant there was a storm coming, and I wanted to get home before then.

I walked back into the building, seeing Jada’s boyfriend escorting her towards the door. I held it open willingly, ready to get the hell away from this place as soon as possible. I helped Jada into the car as I noticed the swelling of her face had gone down slightly, but not much. She had to have a concussion so I immediately figured Mike would be staying the night to watch over her.

God this was so messed up…

Then before I could even disappear into the back of the SUV to leave a hauntingly familiar face waked out of the back just like Jada, and Drew’s dark eyes engulfed me. She looked shocked, like really shocked, but whenever I took her in I couldn’t help but be terrified of her. Her mouth seemed to want to call out to me but I got into the SUV anyway, allowing Mike to drive off back towards the city.

My eyes caught Drew’s once more before disappearing around the corner and I realized I had wanted to get away from her.

I was scared.

I felt something in my heart hurt at the realization but I couldn’t help it. When I had seen her… images of how crazy she had looked into the ring flooded my memory. The way her magnificent eyes had turned into a darkness I had never seen before, like Jada was the worst person in the world. I found myself thinking about how Drew could do that, how she could have no sympathy in her heart when it came to being in a ring…

The images sickened me, but I tried not to think about them as I gazed out the window, rain drops rolling slowly down the glass.

Then my phone rang out, and when I looked down I saw that it was in fact a text from Drew. My stomach tightened, mostly because I had nothing to say to her, at least not yet but I still couldn’t ignore the text.

I opened my phone, reading to myself, “Bree… why didn’t you tell me?”

I didn’t know how to analyze the text. What exactly did she mean “tell her?” It’s not like I could just randomly go up to her and ask why she enjoyed beating people’s faces in without receiving some kind of consequence. It was none of my business, and she wasn’t even supposed to have seen me tonight.

That had obviously backfired.

I ended up deleting the text, not sure how to respond and not being able to continue staring at it. I had no idea what I should say to her, but I figured I wouldn’t have to face her until Tuesday anyway.

That should be a good amount of time to sort everything out.

~ ~ ~ ~

“Bree, you’re heads not in it tonight…”

I looked at Maria, knowing she was absolutely right but being honest didn’t feel like the answer. Telling her what Drew and my sister were involved in just didn’t seem right, and it definitely wasn’t my place to tell her.

But God I felt like everything was eating me alive right now and it sucked not being able to say anything.

I shook my head, “I know… just uh, not feeling so well I guess.”

Besides the fact that I was a shitty liar Maria knew better, and she knew when I was upset without me having to tell her. I loved her for it but right now I just didn’t want to talk about anything, and rehearsal wasn’t the place to be probed.

She shook her head, “Is it Drew or…?”

“No,” I immediately answered, giving away everything unintentionally, “Like I said, I’m just not feeling my best tonight… that’s all.”

I watched my bestfriend’s eyes take me in, a worried expression glowing on her face. She nodded, knowing not to pry any further for the sake of rehearsal, “Okay…”

“One more time people!” I directed, falling into the number one last time before it would end up just being us girls in the studio. We had rehearsed Freakshow enough to where we all felt confident, so me and the rest of the girls would start on Dollhouse next week.

The song ended after what felt like an eternity of dancing and we all clapped, eager to perform this for the recital. I was proud of everyone, knowing we had worked hard for three weeks on this dance and it had come together quite great.

I dismissed, “Great guys, remember girls only next Tuesday.”

Then the guys sounded just a little too grateful as the girls protested slightly, but I knew we would have fun.

But the thought of seeing Drew Tuesday made me uneasy.

Maria walked up to me as I turned off the studio, readying myself to go. She spoke, “Drew picking you up tonight? Cause we can catch the bus together if not.”

I shook my head, “No, she’s not picking me up so that sounds good.”

I picked up my bag after I slipped on my sweats and jacket, knowing the next two days would be filled with awful anticipation. I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Drew and what I had seen and it was driving me crazy.

She had texted me a few times but I hadn’t responded, I just had no idea what to say to her. I was kind of scared of her in all honesty, and the realization really cut me deep. After all the good things we had shared I suddenly felt like I didn’t know Drew at all.

And that was the worst thing about all of this.

Maria hooked her arm with mine as we walked outside, and to my own shock there stood Drew. She was worn, her eyebrow stitched from the previous fight with my sister. I felt my heart literally fall to my ass as Maria looked at me, “Uh, I thought you said…”

Drew stepped towards me, “Bree… can we talk?”

I looked at Maria, not knowing what the hell to do. I didn’t want her to think there was something bad going on between Drew and I but there was, and it was obvious right now. I shook my head at Drew, “No, I’m going home…”

Maria just went against me, “What are you saying? Talk to her…”

I looked at Drew, seeing her eyes pleading me for a chance to explain herself. I didn’t know what she was going to explain but Maria wasn’t going to let me walk away from her. Oh if only you knew Maria…

Maria sighed, “I’ll see you later okay? Text me.”

I gave her a look that said “please don’t leave” but she did anyway, leaving me and Drew alone. I was forced to turn my attention back to the blonde standing right in front of me, looking as if she was having a hard time standing here with me.

I couldn’t help but catch an attitude, “I thought you were out of town.”

The sarcasm was apparent in my voice but I couldn’t help myself, the images of Friday night were still fresh in my brain and I didn’t like them at all. The memories of how Drew had annihilated my sister had really fucked me up, and looking at Drew I saw that she had taken quite a bit of damage too.

She shook her head, “Bree, how was I supposed to tell you something like that?”

I threw my hands up, realizing I was a bit more angry than scared right now of Drew. Sure, she was pretty dangerous when it came to fighting but I was still pissed over the face Jada was still in the running alongside Drew. I knew it wasn’t all Drew’s fault, but I wanted someone to be mad at and she was the first available option. Not the easiest but…

“I don’t know Drew, but I didn’t ask you to come tonight to talk.”

I began walking towards the street, attempting to hail a cab but I felt Drew’s grip on me. It didn’t hurt, she was just barely grabbing me but I turned to her, anger and fear laced within my expression. Drew took notice and dropped my arm, a look of defeat growing on her face, “I-I’m sorry… I just… let me explain myself.”

The haunting images of Drew were playing in my mind, it was literally all I could see and I knew I needed to get the hell away from her. I needed space to figure all of this out and how I was supposed to handle this.

I needed to get away from her.

I shook my head, “I need to go.”

I watched Drew’s shoulders shrink in pain, as if I had taken her air to breathe. I felt bad for doing this to her but I needed space, I was scared of her, and being scared of her and talking to her wasn’t something that was okay with me. I needed to get my head right before we had any kind of talk.

She was dangerous, and coming to terms with that was one of the most painful things I had felt as I hailed a cab and left Drew at the gym.