Chapter 6

6 years ago

"Look! Another white one!" Josh pointed out as Carter and him sat in the sand of the dunes right outside the shore, looking over at the tent the adults had gathered at for the annual beach barbeque. "This one is called a Pieris Rapae. Or just the White Cabbage butterfly," he said.

Carter gave a glance at Josh before looking back at the butterfly with a smile forming his lips. "You know a lot about butterflies," he commented.

"I just think they're beautiful and interesting," Josh shrugged, his shoulder pressed against Carter's as they looked out at the shore, the Ammophila plant peacefully swaying in the wind.

Carter looked back at Josh for a moment, looking at the pale skin of his neck and arms. Even though it was always so warm and sunny here, Josh's skin stayed pale. Though it was then that he noticed a small, purple colored area on his upper arm which was almost entirely hidden by the sleeve of his shirt. He reached out his hand and carefully ran his fingertip over the area, Josh immediately turning to him as he did.

"What happened here?" Carter asked, pushing up the sleeve to see that the bruise was a lot larger than it appeared.

Josh immediately pulled his arm back and tugged his sleeve down. "...I bumped my arm into the door knob," he said, his lips curling up into a silly smile. "Stupid, right?"

"Sounds and looks painful," Carter said, though he wondered why Josh immediately got so cautious. Though he assumed he was ashamed of being clumsy. Carter sat up a little and went to sit crossed-legged. "I don't want to go back to school next week," he said before he let out a yawn. "Though Middle School is nicer than I had expected."

As Carter gave a glance back at the tent the adults were at, he noticed something going on. Someone, who appeared to be a man, was yelling something and being held back by someone else. "Hey, what's going on there?" he asked. The two boys stood up and looked at what was going on. "Isn't that your father?"

"Oh no..." Josh started to run back to the tent almost in an instant and Carter was quick to follow him.

When they reached the party tent, they heard the yelling more clearly and Carter noticed the empty beer bottles lying around in the sand.

"YOU'RE ALL FUCKING BASTARDS! DON'T YOU DARE TALK TO ME LIKE THAT!" Josh's father furiously yelled as he was being held back by Carter's father.

"Steve! Calm down!" Carter's father tried to restrain him, but the man only struggled in his grip.

"Dad! Stop it!" Josh yelled and he jumped in front of his father. Josh's father looked at him before he was released from Carter's father's grip.

"We're going home, right now!" Josh's father angrily spoke and he roughly grabbed Josh by his bruised upper arm.

Carter's mother had grabbed her son by his shoulders and Carter watched as Josh got practically dragged away by his father, wondering what had happened while Josh gave one quick glance back at Carter before he got yanked back by his father.

Now

It had been a very long time since Carter had been anywhere so crowded and loud. It was rather dark as well, flashing neon lights lighting up the room as a large crowd danced in the center of the room, and booths were lined up next to the bar. Paxton and Alyssa were well on their way of getting drunk. Both of them laughed loudly at their own jokes. Carter had to laugh along simply at how stupid their jokes were and at how frantic their laughter was. He sipped his beer as he sometimes looked around to see Chris and Melanie dancing between the crowd of dancing people.

"Joshua! Come on, have a drink as well!" Paxton cheered before taking a swig of his beer.

Josh shook his head and leaned back against the booth. "You know I don't do alcohol," he said. This was actually something that surprised Carter. He had expected Josh to dance and drink along with their friends. Though he could perfectly understand it if he didn't like alcohol; Carter himself hated it. The burning feeling in his throat made him feel nauseous.

"Pax! Come on, let's dance!" Alyssa said after she had taken her shot of vodka and pulled him out of the booth to go to the dance floor, leaving Carter and Josh behind.

Carter put his beer back down, also not liking the taste of that and the loud music was close to giving him a headache. Though seeing his friends having fun was nice. He had wanted to do things like this with them. Just a group of friends having fun. It was, in a way, sort of relaxing.

"You don't like alcohol?" Carter heard Josh's voice next to him.

Carter shook his head. "No, I don't. It's kind of lame, I know," he said. "Why don't you drink?" he asked, trying to keep up the conversation.

Josh gave a glance at the beer before looking back out on the dance floor. "Bad experience," he answered.

Carter wondered what he meant by that answer but figured it was most likely something that had happened in his five years of absence. His gaze fell to Josh's hand and recalled how he had put it on his thigh, and how their pinky fingers were wrapped around each other back in the car.

Alyssa was now dancing with Melanie in a rather erotic way, their hips swaying to the melody of the music and their chests bounced up and down. Carter wondered if he should feel something, watching girls dance like that. But he didn't. If anything he was paying more attention to the guy behind them who had pulled his shirt off and had very visible abs. He then looked back at Josh and wondered why he wasn't out there with the rest of their friends. From what Carter remembered, Josh always liked to dance at the school parties of Middle School.

"Don't you want to dance?" Carter asked, taking another sip of his beer before deciding that he really did not like the taste of it.

"I don't really dance anymore."

Carter frowned a bit when he couldn't understand what the other said over the loud music. "What did you say?"

Josh leaned in and placed a hand on Carter's shoulder, bringing his mouth closer to the other male's ear. "I said I don't really dance anymore," he spoke.

Carter felt his hot breath against his ear as he spoke and it had him hold his breath a little. Though he didn't like it that Josh didn't dance anymore. He doesn't remember him being good at it, but it always made him laugh and look happy.

"Besides, you'd be alone if I went now," Josh added.

"Well then in that case..." Carter grabbed Josh by his wrist and pulled the taller male off the booth and led him to the dance floor. He wasn't much of a dancer himself, but if he could get Josh to dance and have some fun, and make him look as happy as he did back then again, he'd think it was worth it.

"Carter I don't think this is a-"

"Oh shut your face and dance," Carter said and he brought them to Chris and Melanie who were now dancing together. They cheered when Carter and Josh joined them and Melanie immediately grabbed Carter's hands to move them around. He let out chuckle at how stupid it probably looked and tried to dance along a little. Tried.

He gave a glance up at Josh whose arms were being moved by Chris and he could see a smile forming his lips, making Carter smile as well.

Eventually, Carter was dancing with Melanie who snickered at his probably awkward dance moves but he didn't really care; he was having fun with his friends again after so long, and Josh was finally loosening up.

Alyssa and Paxton also joined them after a while, Paxton holding a beer in his hands and took a swig after having grouped up again.

"Josh!" Alyssa called out and wrapped her arm around his waist, leaning against him and grinning happily. Carter could tell that she was really getting drunk now.

"You're finally dancing!" Paxton said and raised his beer bottle. "I told you it would be good to let your daddy issues go for just a moment!"

Carter furrowed his eyebrows at that comment and looked at Josh, whose expression had suddenly changed.

Chris put a hand on Paxton's shoulder and pulled him back a little. "Pax, stop that," he said.

Paxton pulled away from Chris' grip. "But it's true isn't it? Poor little Joshy here doesn't drink alcohol because he's afraid it will turn him into the monster that his father is right now-"

When Paxton had barely finished his sentence, Josh's fist had found it's way to his cheek. The impact of the punch had him stumble a little and Carter's eyes went wider.

"Josh!" Melanie shouted, her voice sounded shocked.

Chris held Paxton back who was about to lash back at Josh and Carter pushed Josh away.

"Guys stop it!" Carter spoke loudly, one hand placed on Josh's chest to hold him back.

Josh let out a groan and stepped away, running a hand through his hair. "Fuck this. I'm going home," he said before walking away from the dance floor and towards the entrance.

"Josh!" Chris shouted after him, but Carter was quick to step in.

"I'll go with him," he said. "We can take the bus back. You just try to keep Alyssa and Pax under control, okay?"

Chris gave a sigh before he nodded his head, glancing from Paxton to Alyssa before turning back to the other male."Yeah, sure. I'm sorry, Carter."

"It's okay." Carter flashed his friend a smile before going after Josh who had already left the building.

Carter walked outside, finally getting some fresh air after being stuffy for so long. He wasn't sure how long they had stayed inside. Probably an hour or two, he wasn't sure. He looked around once he got onto the pavement and saw Josh already sitting on the bench of the bus stop. He walked up to him, knowing he was still upset.

"Hey," Carter said before he sat down next to the other.

Josh briefly glanced at him before his gaze traveled back to the street in front of him. "Hey," he greeted back.

Carter wasn't entirely sure what to say. He had the urge to ask Josh what Paxton had meant, but he thought that wouldn't be a good idea. He should at least try to calm him down for now. "...Pax didn't know what he was saying. He was drunk."

"No, Paxton knew exactly what he was saying, because he was drunk," Josh responded. "He turns into a despicable bastard when he's drunk and hits you right where it hurts. He knows this very well so usually avoids alcohol. Though, not always, as you can see."

Carter wondered if a similar thing had happened before. He knew he had missed so many important things during his years of absence. He felt like he had to get to know his friends all over again. None of them were the same as they were five years ago, after all.

It didn't take long for the bus to arrive. It was the last bus going to Port Hayland so they were in a luck. Carter and Josh went to sit somewhere in the back, next to each other, and Carter looked out the window while they drove. It had been a while since he had taken the bus at night. He always thought everything looked a lot prettier when it was dark out.

"I'm sorry," Carter then heard Josh's voice talk. He turned his head and looked up at him.

"For what?" he asked.

"For what happened tonight. We were supposed to be celebrating your return, but I ruined it. Maybe if I also had gotten drunk, and went along with it, I wouldn't have been dragging you back to Port Hayland right now," Josh said.

Carter gave a smile and shrugged. "It's okay, really. I don't even like going out like that. I just went along because everyone else wanted me to come with them. You know I've always prefered to do things that aren't too strenuous."

Josh gave a soft chuckle before letting out a yawn. "Yeah, I know."

It was nearly a fifteen minute drive with the bus to the stop of Port Hayland, so Carter knew they were going to be sitting there for a while. He was starting to get a little tired himself and he looked outside the window, occasionally also looking at the vague reflection of Josh against the glass. He could see he had closed his eyes and was on his way to falling asleep. The corners of Carter's mouth tugged up a little, thinking the blond looked kind of adorable like that.

It was then that Carter felt Josh's weight against him and felt his hair tickle against his cheek as Josh rested his head against Carter's shoulder. His body tensed up a little at the sudden feeling of affection but soon relaxed again as he heard Josh's steady breathing

"I'm sorry," Carter heard Josh murmuring softly. "I missed you..."

Carter looked at the top of Josh's head, feeling his warmth against his side. He could practically feel hi cheeks turning red at what the other said and gently placed a hand on Josh's shoulder. "Wait, Josh? What do you mean?" he asked, though there came no response from the other, and he realized that Josh had already fallen asleep.