Chapter 113
The Carrero Heart - Beginning (Friends to Lovers)
Arrick moves out of reach and wanders to the fridge, opening it to rummage the contents and pulls out some labelled tubs. His housekeeper is paid to keep it stocked and easy for him when he wants to eat;
his strict diet when in training means he eats a lot of healthy foods and high protein, but he is rummaging for something else. Itâs early morning, he woke me up with his alarm and now heâs showered and ready to go to the gym at stupid oâclock even though I am half asleep and struggling to get ready for school.
Who even does that on purpose?
We were up so late, watching movies, fooling around and even had a little steamy make-out session that could have gone a lot further if he wasnât such a gentleman. I am suffering now though as I watch him, still in my clothes from last night, finding some breakfast before he takes me home to get ready properly. Normally I wouldnât be up for another hour at least, but I donât want to get a cab home this tired and dragging my weekend bags with me.
âI want to go back to bed.â I whine petulantly, tiredness making me grumpy. Iâve never been a morning person and rub my eyes and head groggily. Arrick throws me back an indulgent smile and goes back to raiding the fridge, pulling out what looks like oatmeal and fruit.
Ughhhh, heâs trying to poison me.
I join him at the fridge and poke around the huge pile of clear tubs with various titles. Spying a Chinese takeout box, I pull it forward and am disappointed to see it is being used to hold a variety of chopped peppers and salad.
âDo you never just want to grab a greasy dog and a chocolate bar?â I screw my nose up and dig deeper into the depths of organized eating; his fridge is a poster child for healthy living and organic goodness. There is nothing in here that even slightly calls to me to be eaten.
âNot at six a.m., Sophie, no. You really do worry me sometimes with your eating habits. Please tell me you have not been fending for yourself with hot dogs and candy for the last three months.â He runs an eye over my body as though to check if he might have missed any obvious signs of malnutrition and I eye roll. I pull out a box without a label and sigh at diced chicken with some sort of seasoning that is obviously marinating for another meal.
âI want pancakes.â I sniff a tub of dressing and stick a finger in to taste it, hoping itâs some sort of syrup and screw my face up at its chili taste. Wiping it off my tongue with my nail and catch him looking at me like Iâm some sort of alien creature he found in his kitchen.
âBaby, I havenât got time to make them right now. Just grab something quick so we can get ready and go. I have to get you home, so you can get ready. I need to meet Nate before five-thirty at the gym.â
Arrick throws two containers back in the fridge and pulls out a carton of fresh orange instead. Pouring two glasses beside the two bowls of oatmeal and fruit.
He must be insane if he thinks I am eating that crap.
âI donât like you anymore.â I sigh. Pushing the fridge shut dejectedly and eyeing up the plates he is now carrying to the table.
âI know. Come on, I want to make sure you eat before I drop you off. I know how lazy you can be in the morning and youâre then starving by lunch.â Heâs bossy this morning, a return to Arry of old and no longer pandering to my every whim while heâs in paternal mode. I stick my tongue out at him behind his back.
âLetâs go now and find a convenience store to stock up on junk food, I cannot come over here if you do not have a good supply for my womanly needs. Chocolate is a must, Cheetos ⦠we need some Pepsi for sure.â I slump back against the counter once more as he turns and gives me that commandeering narrowed gaze frown, making me obey and I follow him to what looks like granola, with fruit, and maybe milk, maybe yoghurt. Natasha comes to mind and I screw up my face in disgusting memory. I follow him anyway and sit in my usual seat, sliding down as he pushes my bowl towards me and digs into his own. I hate that he is a sexy eater, it just draws attention to the muscles in his face and that crazily strong jaw, those perfectly soft, not overly full lips that were invented for kissing âYou eat like a kid; your diet is awful. I donât know how you are so thin and toned for someone who eats like a sugar-addicted five-year-old.â Arrick scalds me, pushing my plate back at me as I push it away, with a raised brow that signals heâs not in the mood. I push it sideways and lay my head on the table dramatically. Too tired to eat and hating that I have even met five a.m. on purpose. He has no idea how unhealthy for my disposition this is.
âI donât know how you got so beefy and muscular for someone who eats like a rabbit.â I stick my tongue out at him from my flat posture and start running my finger in circles on the surface. Praying something falls out of the sky which is both edible and energy-boosting.
âWell, if youâre staying here a lot then get used to it, as you are not going to be living on Cheetos and Pepsi. I donât mind the occasional splurge when Iâm on a training break, but I donât want you living on that crap, Sophs. I had to lose like ten pounds after getting lazy with you, I am not doing that again.â He frowns at me and then pushes my foot under the table with his to get me to sit up.
âFine we will stay at mine then. You can bring your rabbit food and leave me to my fridge of cold pizza, takeout and junk food.â I sigh and bury my face on top of my outstretched arms, ignoring his attempts to get me upright, closing my eyes in a bid to sleep on the table. I feel like hell and now I am wishing I didnât spend copious hours playing tonsil tennis with one very practiced Carrero and slept more.
âYou do realize this is me your talking too? I will clean out your fridge and restock it, youâre my girlfriend now, meaning I have more say.â He sounds like heâs smiling, and I look up to see him grinning at me while eating his gross food. Finding himself utterly amusing and yet weirdly I do not.
âOh, for a minute I thought Jake was here ⦠You can only dream that you get to boss me around the way he does.â I sit up and narrow my eyes at him, not about to take any crap from him at all, especially over food. I even might let the girlfriend comment slide, seeing as I have not agreed to any such thing yet.
âMaybe I need a list of things I do get to boss you around over.â He narrows his gaze back at me, I guess testing the waters at my lack of picking him up on the girlfriend label.
âSetting ground rules or telling you which things are not your concern?â I raise my eyebrows cheekily at him, smirking and relaxing into the old atmosphere we always had. I feel better after sleep, even if I havenât had enough and I am getting used to his presence again, falling into our roles from before. I like that we havenât lost the bickering banter and passive-aggressive affection from before. That was something I always loved about us.
âWe need ground rules. First one being I wonât have my girl eating crap all the time, it may not affect you now, but it will eventually. Besides, the crabby ass moods you get in would probably improve with a better diet.â He raises one dark brow, that slight smug hint of a smirk in the depths.
âI think you are probably the cause of those crabby ass moods, like ninety-nine percent of the time. Iâll change my diet in small ways if you give me full-body massages once a week.â I retort sassily, head thinking how good it will feel to let him strip me naked for that. I always did imagine what it would be like and I guess I get to experience it now. Perks of Arry as my boyfriend, I guess. I kind of like that title, maybe I should permanently let the girlfriend label slide.
âDeal. Iâll give you more than one a week if you like. Iâll give them daily.â He winks, and I can see this conversation taking a different turn. I narrow my gaze at him, breaking when he chuckles and pokes me on the end of the nose with his thumb, returning to his crappy breakfast.
âOkay with that sorted, letâs talk sleepovers. After tonight I am back in training and I am overseeing a new merger in Carrero Corp, so would be easier if you stayed here with me some nights a week. Thatâs if you want to stay with me?â He pauses mid spoonful and flickers a glance down at me, looking incredibly young and boyish at that moment.
âWeâre not doing sex, but weâre doing sleepovers?â I frown at him, confused why he would want that if he knows we are not going to do anything that requires a bed.
âWhy not? I still want you beside me some nights even if it makes me take a dozen cold showers.â He smiles again and goes on crunching on his food, completely dismissive of any weirdness in that sentence. My stomach rumbles involuntarily and I eye up the bowl a little defeatedly. Pondering whether I can eat it or not and knowing if I donât I will literally starve. I donât do well on lack of food.
âI need to be home sometimes, to work, to study. I donât know what nights.â I answer childishly, pouting over my lack of pancakes and staring out past the ceramic bowl to the New York skyline from his wide windows. Itâs raining today, and the sky is overcast, not that itâs important in any way but I realize how nice the view is from here at this time of the day.
âIâm not trying to pressure you to stay, just if you want to, then I want you to know itâs an open offer, Sophs. I would have you with me every night.â He draws my attention back to him with a little worried look and I smile at him to ease his tension.
âOkay.â I answer, not sure what else to say really. Yes, I want to be here with him too but no, I am not ready to throw all in and give him everything while I still feel like I need time. There is a part of me that still thinks he needs to work for this a little, stubborn Sophie who wonât back down.
âIâm sorry if Iâm being pushy, I know Iâm getting ahead of myself. I really want you here, want this to work.â Again, he looks so young and wary and it makes me feel crappy. I sigh and tilt my head up, moving to sit up properly.
âI want that too, I know youâre not being pushy. I just need a little breathing space, to get my head around this.â I shrug, unable to look him in the eye for a moment because I know itâs not the answer he wants.
âI understand baby; Please eat, Sophs. I canât take you home unless you do. I hate seeing you living on pancakes and sundaes.â He cuts in, changing the topic because he obviously realizes itâs not the time to go into this. I need time and he promised me I could have it.
âUghhh, for Godâs sake. I think Iâm going to rename you Jake!â I snap; never a morning person and hating how nagging he can be sometimes. Heâs worse than my mom.
âJake would get fewer arguments from you. You do what he tells you.â He points out with a frown, a little hint of attitude because itâs true. But then Jake is my godfather and he can be one scary dude when he wants to be.
âJakeâs less of an ass than you are.â I retort, leaning out and picking up the spoon in my bowl to mix the mixture of food childishly.
âThanks, I love you too, Sophsâ¦. Okay, back to this ⦠I train every weekday morning and twice in the evening; I can never schedule my work rota at Carrero Corp as lately itâs been hectic so really, we are going to have to take each day as it comes in terms of dating. I also have a fight in three weeks, I need to fly to Miami a week before. I guess Iâll have to plan everything around all that.â He pushes my bowl back towards me when he sees me playing with it and I give him a look that equates to âI am still not eating itâ that is met with a frown.
âCheck us being all proper grown-up and organized. Do I need a calendar to write this all down?â I smirk at him, slapping his hand off when he tries to pick up my spoon to push at me.
âA spank maybe, how about you just text me daily and tell me when to pick you up. Iâll tell you when I canât. I meant what I said. I would see you every second of every day if you let me.â He sighs heavily, eyes homed in on my lack of eating and I refrain from sticking my tongue out at Mr. Frustrating. over there.
âWhy does this feel the same?â I sigh, eyeing him up with scrutiny suddenly, wondering if itâs normal that we have reverted back to us of old. Suddenly wondering what that even means.
âWhat do you mean? Same as what?â He stops and glances up at me from his bowl, looking at me like he has no clue what I mean. A teeny hint of concern in the depths.
âAll of this seems just like when we used to make plans to go off skiing or to hang out, it doesnât feel different. Weâre being so ⦠normal.â I wave my hands about to emphasize my point and then flop onto my elbows once more, caging my bowl. Arrick straightens and shrugs at me, eyes on my food that I am once again stirring absentmindedly.
âBecause it is normal, relationships are like this, Sophie. Best mates who also fuck and kiss a lot. No other dates or people in the way, but like we were, with a whole lot more intimacy and touching.â He shrugs with one shoulder, looks relieved and goes back to what he was doing, reaching out to stop me from sending the contents of my bowl over the edge with the way I am messing with it. He stills my hand and pushes the darn thing back at me more forcefully this time.
âWhat did you think it would be like?â He adds in afterthought.
âI donât know. Awkward maybe. That it would be, or feel different, and not feel so normal and non-scary.
I thought it would be something new and kinda weird.â I watch that perfectly calm face, the twinge of a neat eyebrow as he takes in what I am saying and the little smile that breaks the corner of his mouth. I also pick up my spoon and go straight back to drawing patterns in my granola so that some sploshes on the table in the most satisfying way. He looks at me like he maybe is rethinking the spanking comment and eats.
âWhen we get to sex it will change the dynamics a little, but generally, we already had a close relationship. Thatâs why weâre doing this slowly, so nothing is scary or overwhelming for you, baby. Just us like this and we will work up to more later if you want to. This is how it really is; we already had something that worked.â He seems confident in the fact, while I just feel confused.
âGuess Iâm used to guys who try to hump my leg constantly, fuck me about, leave me hanging, and screw my so-called mates when they donât get what they want.â I shrug this time and go back to torturing my food with my spoon. Complacent about my dating past and not feeling anything about any of the scumbags who never deserved me anyway.
âNone of that is ever going to happen with me. We have always been honest with each other. I might occasionally hump you though when I get majorly horny from you doing things like this.â Raising a brow, he leans under the table and catches my foot which has crept up his warm leg under of its own accord, wiggling toes up his leg, not thinking of what that had been doing to him. With a warm hand around my heel, he lets my foot drop back to the floor with a furrowed cute look.
âOops.â I blush and sit my feet together on the floor. Feeling a little cold on the wooden surface seeing as I am barefoot. Arrick adjusts his sweatpants and carries on eating, shaking his head at me with the half-smile that sets his dimples off. Sighing heavily that his girl about gave him a boner without intending too, with her foot because they were cold.
âDonât ever be afraid to talk to me, tell me what youâre thinking and call me out on bullshit. We are no different to how we were, only closer. I want us to be so much closer than we were.â He picks up his glass of orange and takes a long drink, watching me carefully. Every mannerism controlled in his very Arrick way. I stare at him fascination as he drinks his squash, at his Adamâs apple moving sexily in that strong neck.
âThat sounds ⦠nice.â I answer, aware that he is a little too focused on me, eyes going straight back to my bowl with a brow flicker as he puts his glass down.
For goodness sakes, stop obsessing, Arry!
âEat, Sophie, for the love of God or I will literally spoon feed you.â Arrick looks at his watch and pushes my bowl back at me in agitation after I eased it further out again; getting up now he has finished and gives me that Carrero glare. He is trying to exert a little command and failing. I shake my head at him and meet a sigh of resignation.
âOkay, so we have all that agreed on ⦠Anything else?â I pout, pulling over the bowl and take a spoonful anyway, because now his sighing has me feeling shitty when all he wants is to take care of me and his irritation is becoming evident. I am pleasantly surprised that it actually tastes good and start to dig in while he takes his bowl to the sink and rinses it. He looks up, sees me chewing and smiles impulsively. Happy that he thinks he has some sway over me when really, I didnât think I could handle any more of his womanly whining.
âYou tell me. Is there anything you want to talk about or set in stone?â He asks pointedly. I have to admit itâs odd to see him standing washing dishes at five a.m. while dressed in gym clothes and looking weirdly ⦠domestic. And that brings a certain 1950s aspiring housewife to mind.
I ponder telling him to cut Natasha off once and for all, but hold my tongue, knowing that it is selfish and pathetically insecure, and he already explained to me why he wonât. He wonât be impressed if I say screw her fatherâs cancer and kick her to the sidewalk. The little brat voice in my head says I should demand it with bells on and yet Miss. Mature. whoâs trying to be a better person, tells me to keep it to myself if I want this relationship to go anywhere.
âI want to go out on proper dates.â I blurt out instead, not sure which part of my brain formulated that one when looking for an alternative to burning Natasha in hellfire. I guess I want to experience that with him.
âTell me where and we will. Or do you want me just to surprise you?â Arrick doesnât even blink at my request, mind on planning our life I guess, and itâs strangely reassuring to see him back like this. Back to the guy who would drop a trip on me, jump at an idea and plan everything I said on a whim. He stopped being this guy when he was with her, like she sapped all the spontaneity out of him and forced him into the quiet lane of life.
âThe aquarium, and the zoo ⦠I miss skiing with you, and maybe we could do that rock climbing thing again in the sports place you used to go to.â I lift my spoon and watch the contents pour back down into the bowl, mesmerized by the way it sploshes in the milk before trying another spoonful and again being surprised that it still tastes edible. Iâm hungry enough to eat it now and decide I may not die if I allow him to feed me one healthy breakfast. My parents make me eat this kind of crap from time to time so might as well face it.
âSo, you want me to take you everywhere we used to go and do the things we did before I moved out here?â He laughs, eyeing the mess I am making and says nothing. I wonder if that little OCD part of his brain is thinking about putting a bib on me and maybe feeding me himself next time.
âU-huh, except you know ⦠you could throw in a lot of romance too. Maybe a candlelit picnic at the zoo or matching ski suits with âI love Sophie foreverâ written on your hat!â I shrug and stuff a huge mouthful in this time, crunching noisily even though some of it has gone soggy.
Still tastes edible!
âYou donât want much do you, baby?â He chuckles, tossing the dishcloth he is using to the side and rolls his sleeves back down. Itâs oddly sexy seeing him being a house husband. âSure, we could do all that and more.â He comes back to stand at his chair casually and watches me continue eating, ungracefully. I wonder if eating like an untrained ape is sexy to him at all and judging by the frown on his face right now, I guess not.
âI want Cheetos, Pepsi and a corn dog for dinner when I come home from school tonight.â I add, knowing fine well that after enduring this for my start to the day, I deserve a decent meal later.