The Accidental Marriage: Chapter 25

My thoughts are a jumbled mess, I rush to the garage, then drive like a madman on the road. The first thing that comes to mind is that the entire matter has been staged. After all, Harvey knows how much I hate my mother, along with her manipulations and anybody who might take part in facilitating them. But then logic questions how I can be certain Harvey’s telling the truth about Mom and Lareina. He used Soledad to drug me. He’d have no problem using my wife to get me to agree to be his legal puppet.

Regardless, I need to see it with my own eyes to be sure. I trust nothing when it comes to my mother and uncle.

I get to the restaurant and walk right past the hostess, whose expression quickly goes from smile to shock, weave through the tables and booths until I find my wife—

And my mother.

The impact of seeing the woman I swore I’d never see again slams into me like a wrecking ball. Somehow I’m transported back to the cabin, tied up and helpless. She croons how much she loves me, then pours the “water” into my mouth, pinching my nose and forcing me to drink. She smiles like she’s just won the Best Mom Award. I clench my clammy hands and glare at the woman, wishing I could strangle her so she will never appear before me again.

I hate it that Harvey’s picture didn’t do her justice. She’s still beautiful, confident and immaculately packaged to hide the rot underneath. Her eyes—those fucking blue eyes that look just like mine—bore into Lareina, and I want to gouge them out so she can never gaze at anyone ever again.

“Don’t forget, Lareina—blood is thicker than water. And it’s my blood that flows in Ares’s veins. Your tenuous little link to him can be broken anytime, but the bond between my son and I is forever.” The words sound reptilian. Everything inside me tenses with loathing and denial. I don’t give a shit about the blood bond she loves so much. She’s not my mother—she’s a monster.

But does Lareina see it that way? My exes often asked why my “mom” was Asian, then wondered about my birth mom and if I missed her. Some of them even suggested I should spend some time with her because I might regret it later in a misguided attempt to get me to open up and share what was on my mind. Harvey said Zoe is Lareina’s godmother. My wife might have some affection for her and might believe she and I should forget the unpleasant past and get along.

I start to step forward to pull Lareina out of the restaurant. I have no desire to hear her response. And I realize I’m scared that she might agree with my mother. I don’t want to see her differently because despite what I’ve been telling myself about her being strange or keeping me off balance, I like being with her.

But she’s quicker.

“But Ares introduced Akiko to me as my mother-in-law. And neither he nor Prescott said a word about you. I guess blood isn’t so thick in your family after all.”

It takes a moment to process Lareina’s buttery words. The tight knot in my gut eases as warm feelings surround my heart. Relief and peace—the likes of which I’ve never experienced—seem to envelop me in a bath of contentment. Although I’ve never said a word to Lareina about Zoe, it’s like she knows what’s on my mind and trusts that my judgment is correct.

It feels nothing less than life affirming. And I want to hold her and tell her how much I adore and cherish her.

But first…

“What the hell are you doing here with my wife?” I grind out as I step forward.

The cool mask cracks, revealing surprise and longing underneath. I don’t buy any of it. My mother is a master manipulator who could give a lesson or two to Aunt Jeremiah.

“Ares. My son.” She smiles. “I was just saying hello.”

I place a protective hand on my wife’s shoulder. “Don’t you understand I don’t want to see you?”

“But I miss you! And I’m your mother! I’m entitled—”

“The only thing you’re entitled to is a long jail sentence.”

She juts out her chin, full of provocation and stubbornness. “You can’t keep me away forever. Your brothers are thirty now.”

“What are you going to do? Grab me again and drag me to the woods?”

“That was a long time ago! Nothing’s happened since!”

“Only because the family managed to keep you away. I don’t trust you. My last memory of you is your pinching my nose so you could force me to drink that drugged water. You left me to die.”

“I didn’t, I swear! I went back!”

I snort. She could tell me the ocean’s salty, and I wouldn’t believe her.

“Are you still looking for the girl who supposedly saved you?” she demands. “She never existed! Why can’t you accept that? It was me who saved you! You just got confused from the drugs and the trauma.”

Her sheer shamelessness is simply astonishing. She stares up at me with all the sincerity she can muster. “No,” I say. “You’re not her. You’ll never be her.”

“She was blonde. Like I was back then.”

Lareina gives her a strange look.

“She almost died to protect you, didn’t she? To spare your life?” Mom insists.

“Then why didn’t you say something before now?” My tone is ruthless, a lawyer cross-examining a witness he knows is committing perjury.

“Your father kept me away from you. He never gave me a chance.”

“Mmm-hmm.”

“Why won’t you believe me? Do you think Prescott loves you?” I reach out to my wife and help her stand. Mom grabs my other arm. “Do you think Akiko actually cares about you?”

I drop my eyes to her white-knuckled grip. The fingers don’t loosen. She glares up at me, her eyes red-rimmed with unshed tears. She should’ve gone into acting. She would’ve won enough Oscars to justify her sheer arrogance and chutzpah.

“Akiko has been more of a mother figure than you could ever be. Without her, I wouldn’t have grown up to be the civilized human being that I am today. Do you think popping babies out of your womb is all that’s required? You have to love and nurture your children, and you haven’t done any of that.”

“I love you. Bryce and Josh too. It’s Prescott who won’t let me be a mother to you. Why is it that you never condemn him for all that he’s done wrong? You always hold me to such impossible standards.”

“All you had to do to make me not hate you was not be a criminal. Have you ever considered the possibility that if you hadn’t kidnapped me and left me to die, I might’ve liked you more? Maybe gotten in touch with you, spent holidays with you, whether you were married to Dad or not? Plenty of my friends have divorced parents, but none of them had to go through what I did. All you had to do was be a minimally decent person, and you couldn’t manage that.”

“What I did was all because I love you! To keep our family together! Why can’t you understand that?”

I shake her off. “You don’t love me or the twins. You only love yourself. We’re just accessories that make you look good. You just can’t fathom that we might have different desires and feelings and needs.” I turn to Lareina. “Let’s go, wife.”

She nods and follows me out amid stares from the other diners. Mom continues to hurl words at me, hoping to convince me to change my mind. But none of them stick.

I instruct Lareina’s driver to take the rest of the day off, and I put her in my car and pull away from the restaurant. Only the sound of the engine fills the Maybach for several blocks. I breathe deeply to hold my churning emotions in. Zoe Dunkel has been the worst kind of monster in my life for so long. Looking at her, I realized I’ve worked harder than anybody around me, had to work harder, just to ensure I’d never be taken advantage of by her again. No more kidnapping, no more manipulation. But facing those still-unhinged eyes somehow froze me in one spot for several moments.

Pathetically weak. Perhaps I’m not as strong as I thought.

“I’m sorry you had to see your mother like that. Are you upset I saw her?” Lareina asks suddenly, interrupting my internal one-way flight to self-loathing. “I didn’t want to see her, but she sort of insisted. And she is my godmother.” The briskness in her tone says the facts are unfortunate, but she has nothing to hide.

Her almost curt, straightforward explanation soothes my frazzled nerves. If she’d offered up a lot of awkward explanations, I would’ve become suspicious. “Do you know her well?” I ask.

“Hardly at all. And I have no plans to get to know her, regardless of what she claims. She’s never done a thing to check up on me or protect me. But now, all of a sudden, she tells me she can ‘help.’ Except I’m married to you, and I don’t need anybody else’s help anymore. Funny timing, isn’t it? If she’d offered even two weeks ago, I would’ve kissed her feet in gratitude. But now?” A careless shrug. “She missed her chance.”

Relief pours through me. “You don’t like her.”

“I don’t, but it’s not about liking or disliking. It’s about her making me feel used and manipulated. But”—the weight of her gaze strokes my face—“are you okay? I mean…she’s your mother.”

“I’m fine. Our relationship became irreparably damaged when she kidnapped me.”

“I’m sorry.” Lareina reaches out and pats my shoulder. “Did she really plan to…you know, kill you?” Her question is halting.

I have to think about it. “Probably not.”

I flex my hand around the steering wheel and concentrate on breathing steadily. Everything about that time burns my gut, makes me want to scream and shout at the heavens for being unfair. No child asks to be born, but care could be taken to ensure the parents aren’t complete sociopaths.

“Hard to say with her. In case you didn’t notice, she’s not quite right up here.” I tap my temple. Then I remember how Lareina bravely bared herself in front of me and my family, and I want to return some of that. Besides, she’s already heard a big chunk of the past thanks to Mom’s blabbering. “When I was ten, Mom and Dad were going through an ugly divorce. A tragic ending, since they originally loved each other. But things quickly went bad because she didn’t marry Dad only for love, but for connections, power and prestige.” I keep my eyes on the road, not wanting to see my wife’s reaction. It’s a sordid past, and I’ve never shared it with any of my exes or friends. “When she realized she couldn’t stop Dad from divorcing her, she decided to kidnap us kids—me, Bryce and Josh.”

Lareina gasps, but doesn’t speak, just squeezes my forearm. The muscles relax a little. Only then do I realize I’ve been clenching my hands.

“Thankfully, Bryce and Josh got away. But I didn’t. She tied me up in a cabin in the woods. Tried to feed me drugged food and water, probably to get me to cooperate and say whatever she needed me to say to my dad. But I refused to eat. Finally, she lost patience and force-fed me some drugs and then left. While she was away, the woods started to burn, which then caused fire in the cabin. She never came back.”

“How did you manage to escape?” Lareina’s soft voice trembles with horror.

“A girl pulled me out. If it hadn’t been for her, I would’ve died. Mom clearly doesn’t want to believe that. But then, she always has been selfish and nasty.”

“But she believes that she helped you out.” Lareina lets out a soft breath. “Guess she’s revised the past.”

“Yes. Everything she did was for us—for the family—because she loves us. Loves me. What a joke.” The bag of Wonder Bread was real. I ate it, tasted the slightly stale and chewy slice. Drank Queen’s clean water. Had conversations with her that kept me sane during the days I had no idea when—or even if—I’d ever be free again.

“She won’t give up easily. She wants to be part of your life again.”

“My ass.” Mom just wants to use me and my brothers to push Harvey out of the mob. She cares about us as much as it benefits her, and not an iota more. “I have her eyes, but that’s about all there is to our relationship.”

Lareina lets out a laugh. “You don’t have her eyes.”

“Of course I do. Everyone can see it.”

“They’re the same color, but they aren’t anything alike.”

“They’re the same shape, too.” I feel slightly annoyed that I can’t let this go, and stupid that I’m pointing out something that’s essentially a flaw. What kind of fool points out what’s wrong with him when he wants the girl to like him?

Whoa. Do I want my wife to like me? I thought… When I first realized we were married, I only planned to stay tied to her until we both got what we wanted—financial freedom for her and the promotion for me. But I realize I haven’t thought about my promotion much. Instead, most of my mental energy has been focused on her—wondering if she was okay, if she felt safe and if she was enjoying herself.

Lareina’s eyebrows knit as she shakes her head. “I guess, but so what? It’s not the same thing. Her eyes are cold and unfeeling. Like…one of those lizards that only has a basic brain. There’s no conscience. When she looks at me, I just want to shudder and leave. But with you, it’s the opposite. Your eyes are compassionate and honest. Smart, too. And determined. I thought it was amazing how you held yourself together in Vegas after your uncle drugged you. If your pupils hadn’t been so wide, I might’ve thought you were sober. Not only that, when you look at me, I feel warm and protected. You have the kind of eyes that make me trust you. Eyes are more than just colors and shapes. It’s about how they can make someone else feel. You have the most beautiful eyes, and believe me, they are nothing like your mother’s.”

My heart pounds. Emotions shake me, and my hands begin to tremble too much for me to continue driving. I pull over, hit the hazard lights and turn to her. “Say that again.”

“Your eyes.” She runs her fingers over the corners of my eyes with a tenderness that makes my heart ache. “They’re nothing like your mother’s. They’re uniquely you, reflecting who you are.”

A tight lump forms in my throat. Her words feel like a light in the dark—salvation after despair. I cradle her shining face, lean over and kiss her with all the tender emotion she arouses. She kisses me back, her thumbs brushing my eyelids, gentle as butterfly wings.

When she touches me like this, I don’t care what Harvey said. I might not even care if she has an ulterior motive. If it’s some sort of insane self-deception, so be it. I’d rather be lost in the sweet maelstrom. At least as long as it lasts.