Chapter 10

Leo's pov

Reginald Ivory Agnes is one of the most strongest alphas, definitely the most feared. Accomplishing everything one could only dream by leading the largest pack of all times,at the youngest age. He made everyone quake in their steps by only raising an eyebrow, is now grinning like a kid listening to my mate as he explained about something to him, rather animatedly.

With a content smile on my face, I watched my two most favorite people interact.

After the lunch, dad insisted us to stay for some more time. Despite having classes, Seb immediately obliged without a word, which is understandable considering how much they indulged in their conversations about certain topics, only they enjoyed. Like the nine hundred year old statue, Seb discovered as a part of his excavation project.

I fish out my phone from the pocket, to take a picture of them. As I keep admiring the picture, a taunting thought makes it's way to the foreground of my mind. What if this is one of the last times I'll see them together,in the same room?

The familiar coldness from this morning clawed at my heart like when I woke up again in an empty bed with no sight of him. I thought it was over, once and for all.

"Leonard!"

I turn around to find both of them intently staring at me, while I'm lost in my thoughts. I approach them with a sheepish smile,sitting at the table by dragging the chair beside Seb.

Clearing his throat, dad starts talking

"I hope you both are aware about the Heksuwan festival that is celebrated in some lineages every year." We nod in response and he continues "So, the council wants to restart the tradition and they offered us the opportunity to organise it, this year." On finishing the sentence, my first instinct was to turn to Seb, to look at his reaction.

I was afraid, that he'd be repulsed by the proposition but he looked rather pleased. Turning towards me, he gives me his brightest smile as it quickly reflects in my mood and I can't help but revel in the ray of hope that smile brought.

The next hour passed by, discussing the necessary arrangements and million more strategies for the smooth implement of the festival in accordance to the reign. I am aware that most of it have to do with the politics of the council but still keeping up with the traditions is fundamental for maintaining pack dynamics.

And it is time for Seb's class, he got up after checking the time. He gave me a side glance before walking up to dad to say his bye before coming my way, I am already fishing the car keys out of my pocket when he approaches me with a confused expression.

" I will drop you." I blurt out,without thinking twice.

"There's no need for that, I can take the train." He declares with a pointed look before walking out of the door.

I swiftly catch up, grabbing his hand to stop him. He stops but not without giving me a dirty look by turning around.

"What are you doing?" He asks, checking if anyone there have seen us.

" I want to, I need to talk to you, Please!" I add.

He looks at me, the skepticism evident in his eyes. I can almost see the gears turning in his head by the way he stood still,his face blank.

"Whatever." He mumbles, making his way towards the car and I follow smiling like an idiot.

I beat him to opening the passenger door, luckily he gets in without a word and our drive starts after I settle in my seat.

The silent journey quickly takes us to the destination, the car making a stop at the large building I recently got familiar with. Looks like we are early, as most of the slots in the parking lot are empty and the campus is overall deserted except for few people. Seb looks at me, his hands folded as a silent gesture for asking me to start speaking. All the speeches I have prepared inside my head seemed to abandon me once again as I stare at him with my mouth agape.

"I--we can talk after the class, it might get late for you." I reply pretending to check the watch for time as Seb just glared at me with an impossible expression. With a disappointed sigh, he exits the car without sparing me a look. His back disappearing into the crowds.

I spent the next hour, thinking about the worst case scenarios of how our 'talk' might go and only a couple of them are with positive outcomes. I still dont know what is the thing about me that agitated him so much, I am aware, partly it has to do with that night and the deal. The stupid deal.

If only I was courageous enough to tell him the truth. I was selfish enough to ask him for the those three months without explaining what they are for and left him to his own imaginations, now he thinks I dont want the one thing I am most grateful for in my life, our bond. How pathetic!

In no time,the empty roads are again filled with people, indicating the class is over. Soon, Seb emerged from the building walking beside the guy, he introduced me earlier. I dont remember his name but it doesnt matter right now by the way something vicious raised up in my stomach as I watch my mate laugh loudly with him. Oh! And the fact that he is all over Sebs personal space making both Rex and I rage.

I got out of the car without much thought, storming towards my mate.  It is the most satisfying sight to watch his eyes flicker in recognition of my scent and his eyes frantically searching for me and settling on me with a relieved smile. And it is far more rewarding to see the other guy's laugh disappear and morph into confusion at his friend's sudden halt.

After saying something to the guy, Seb starts walking towards me, without waiting for a reply from the guy. He grabs my hand upon reaching me and practically drags me towards the direction of the car.

" You shouldn't have gotten out of the car. " He says once we are in the car.

I don't know how to react to what he said. Thinking about it, I don't really have an intelligent explanation as to why I did that, other than the fact I acted like an uncultured beast upon seeing him with a living thing but He's right, I shouldn't have gotten out. So I leave him to take my silence as a reply. I start the engine with the tension still thick in the car.

I drove us to a secluded spot, with no traffic, no people because I can't afford distractions while I am doing this. Mustering up some courage, I turn to my mate, meeting his questioning eyes immediately.

"I'm not really good at these things, so.... please just bear with me. Alright?

I ask him as the non negotiable caution.

He shakes his head in understanding and I start with an exasperated sigh.

"I know I owe you many apologies and so many explanations but..I need to thank you first." I say, stealing a hesitant glance at him.

"Thank you." I finally tell him, the words coming out certainly as I choked on the need to tell him the exact words for the longest time.At last I tell him,for all the times I was thankful for his divine presence in my life and for all the times I couldn't tell him that.

"Thank you. Thanks for putting up with me all this while." I add, as he looks at me with strangest of expressions. Bewilderment written all over his face. Smiling at it, I continue.

" When I just hit eighteen,I was abruptly plucked out of the academy and before I can say anything,I was handed the role of alpha and the pack, the people. Everything happened so quickly, it kind of made it all very overwhelming for me. It's not that I am not grateful for it but I can't deny it wasn't something I was entirely prepared for." I stop,taking a lungful of air before continuing.

"I was deep in the shit, I didn't know what I was doing, I felt so out of place no plan,nothing. And then I met you."

I glance at him, unable to help myself.

His expression unreadable as he turns towards the window.

"To be honest,finding my mate amongst all of that chaos, wasn't something I was hoping for. I know it's stupid of me as I kept pushing myself into believing that I still have more time to find my mate. God!I was so scared of everything when I met you and you-" I stop, with my heart stuck in my throat. I can feel his intent gaze as his complete attention is on me now.

"You are perfect." I say not thinking twice because that's what he is. Perfect.

His expression changes from intent to confused as I blurt out the statement.

"So you wanted time because you thought I was 'perfect' ?" He asks with a sarcastic chuckle, intentionally stressing on the perfect.

"No! I wanted time because I was insecure. " I answer, my voice going low as I say the words out loud for the first time.

He opens his mouth and closes it again, not knowing what to make out of my sudden admission.

"Seeing you handle everything with ease, like you have always been doing it made me question a lot of my abilities, you were perfect in everything, you knew what you were doing, you were quick to adapt to the role, you managed our home, the pack and not to forget, your education. You are even more educated than me. So I thought...I thought you deserved better. You deserve better than the mess I am." I say my voice going groggy with the raw emotions spiralling in my chest.

"I thought it'd be so unfair to you if I drag into the mess that I am, when I can't even handle myself. So I asked for that time but looking back it was so stupid. So stupid that I thought I can handle all of that without you." I finish,with a humorless laugh.

" So when I asked you for those three months, just know it has to do with more about me being your mate rather than you as my mate and I am really ashamed for not giving you any further explanation at the time." I add, meeting his eyes. After, what feels like an eternity, his reaction comes in the form of a curt nod.

"Okay."

Okay?  Is that it. Is this not what he expected at all? Are my reasons too silly? Does he hate me more now?

"Woah! Woah! Hold your horses bud. I don't think that's the case. You just admitted what you've feeling for the past three months. Atleast give him some time to process it." Rex says, stopping me from falling into that spiral. So I listen to him.

We both stay still, giving eachother the needed silence but it is a comfortable silence. The heavy feeling in my heart gradually dissipating as I feel myself breathing in months as I sit in the confined space of a car, where we can hear eachother's heartbeat. A small smile makes it's way to my lips.

"I like your name." I find myself saying, disrupting the quietness we are delving in.

" What? " He asks in shock and disbelief at the hasty nature of the compliment.

"You complained earlier saying why I don't address with your pet name." I explain as a pink shade creeps up to his cheeks, making an adorable blush grace his face.

"I was just -"

"It's cause I really like your name. It has a nice ring to it and I would hate to ruin it by cutting it short." I admit, cutting him off. Now his face turns beet red.

It sure helped in dissolving some tension but even with the lightened mood he says nothing. The growing frustration eating me from within.

"Please! Say something." I plead, sacrificing the opportunity to see his blush some more.

He snaps himself from the bashful state he is in, straightening his posture. The softness in his gaze turning into a serious one. He clears his throat before saying..

"Is that all?"

"Huh?"

"Is that all you wanted to say?"

Now I am genuinely lost on this one, his question vanishing the whatever clarity I had over our conversation. The never-ending frustration making a comeback. I really hadn't done this right. Have I? Giving up whatever resolve that is left in me, I opt for my most used way of dealing, the so-not- subtle way.

"Look! Sebastian, I am not really good at this, I know I have wronged you in many ways and I am very ashamed of myself for it but I want to rectify them. Please! Give me one chance, one more chance. Give us one more chance and I promise... I promise I will make it right this time. "

I open my eyes finally, managing to look at him only to find his dumbfounded expression, which is not very assuring. Not after I have poured my heart out for the first time in the course of my entire existence. To the only person that matters.

No answer comes from him as I wait and When I was almost convinced that he wouldn't consider my request at all, his answer comes in the form of solicitous set of words.

"I need some time to think about it."

And I grin like an idiot as my heart jumped with momentary ecstasy the words brought and the hope that accompanied. The situation might turn very different and he might change his mind. I don't want to worry my mind with such debacles. Right now I can only hope.

So I did.