57. Nervous

Chapter 57: Nervous

Kelsey's POV

*****

I let out a sigh of relief as soon as Meg and I got into her car and made our way to my house. That day was such a stressful one, and it took every ounce of strength within me to keep me from aborting the mission and just let Ethan know that I was back.

"I don't know how we pulled this off," I told her with a small laugh.

"Honestly, neither can I," she replied with a smile.

There had been a lot of close calls, where Ethan was nearly going to head over to where Meg and I were, or at least that was what Jake told us. Meg tried her best to keep me from seeing Ethan too, knowing that if I were to even catch a glimpse of him, I would not be able to restrain myself from running up to him.

"What time's the game?" I asked.

"It starts at six, so we should try to get there at quarter past five so that we can actually find good seats and make Ethan realise you're back," she said with an excited squeal.

I nodded in agreement, the rapid beating of my heart being so intense that I could actually hear it. In a little more than two hours I was going to be seeing Ethan and his siblings again. I was ready to tell him the news in the morning, but the more time that passed, the more nervous I became. I didn't know how he was going to react, and I suddenly started feeling the pressure to make everything perfect.

"Kelsey, calm down. Everything will be fine," Meg told me, as if she had read my mind.

"I know, I'm just so nervous. It's only been about 2 weeks, but I feel like I haven't seen him in ages," I sighed.

"I know baby, I know. I'm sure he's going to be so happy to see you. He loves you, remember that," she reassuringly said.

I simply nodded and rested my head on the window as I looked out at the passing roads, something which had always seemed to relax me. Allowing myself to stare out a window always seemed to remove any kinds of negative thoughts going through my head, making them slightly more bearable.

Meg and I ran up to my room as soon as we got to my house, wanting to find something adequate to wear for the game. Lucky for us, we never got homework on the first day of school, allowing us to spend as much time as we needed planning everything. I knew that the no homework thing would certainly change once I was in college, but I didn't want to think about that. I wanted to enjoy what I had in the moment, and I would worry about the future in the future.

I smiled as I noticed a note on my bed from my father, telling me that he was currently at a meeting with the company which had contacted him right before we left for New York, all thanks to Ms.Perry, who had certainly kept her word. If everybody was as kind as her, the world would certainly be a much, much, brighter place.

"Okay so, what were you thinking on wearing?" Meg asked as she flopped on my bed, clearly tired after the day's events.

"Well, I don't know, I found out he had his game just today. I didn't have time to think about it," I said.

"How about your casual grey dress and your red baseball jacket?" she asked as she walked over to my messily opened luggage on the floor and rummaged through it.

"Yeah, that could work," I nodded, as I tried to visualise that outfit in my head.

"Your clothes are so cute," she gushed as she started taking out multiple outfits from the luggage and placing them on the bed. "Can I borrow something?"

"Sure. I managed to get some stuff from New York, wanting to vamp up my closet a bit."

No matter how much I hated moving to New York, I couldn't deny that their clothes were so much better than the ones you would find in any store back home. They had numerous stores which I had never heard of, or seen before, and who had some of the most beautiful clothes I had ever laid my eyes upon. I remembered walking in the first store, and as soon as my eyes landed on the amazing looks on offer, I found myself wishing that Meg was right there with me, knowing that she would go crazy in there and probably buy the whole store while she was at it.

"Megs I'm nervous," I said yet again after we had finished getting ready.

"Kels, breath. It's going to be fine," she said, putting her hands on my shoulders trying to calm me down.

"What if he's already found someone else?" I asked, worry evident in my voice.

"Kelsey, I've been here these past two weeks. The only girl he has ever mentioned is you," she reassuringly said. Her words made me feel a lot better, but I still couldn't help the numerous negative thoughts going through my head, all of which making me scared to see him again.

"Should we get going?" She asked, sending me a reassuring smile.

"We still have half an hour," I said, wanting to postpone it as much as I possibly could, hoping that I would manage to pull myself together.

"Yeah, but it will already get late till we get there," she said.

I sighed and nodded, knowing that I could no longer delay it. The thoughts and emotions going through my head in that moment were overwhelming. I was glad, excited, afraid, nervous, and all the like. He and I loved each other, that much I was sure of, but I was also the one who told him that he had to move on, and I was sure that the girls who were already entranced by Ethan were just waiting for their moment to make him notice them.

"Stop freaking out!" Meg chuckled.

"What's so funny about me having an almost heart attack?!" I asked, trying as hard as I could to shake off all of those thoughts from my head, and instead replacing them with ones which involved a happy ending.

"You're fine, you seem alive to me," she said as she grabbed her car keys from the kitchen counter and spinning them around her pointer finger before we both headed out.

The drive to the school was a short one, and I could feel my heart stop as Meg parked the car in the school parking lot. I took a deep breath as we opened the doors, Meg's arm instantly wrapping around my shoulder.

"Are you ready?" She asked, looking at me with the most encouraging look ever. "Jake should be waiting for us in front of the entrance," she continued before we made our way over to where he was supposed to be.

The weather was much hotter than I had expected it to be, forcing me to remove my jacket and wrap it around my waist. It may have been the first week of autumn, but the heat clearly wasn't gone. The thought of me getting to see Ethan again only made me feel warmer, and I could feel my cheeks starting to heat up as soon as we drew nearer to Jake, who was waiting for us by the entrance.

"Finally, you're here!" He said as he saw us approaching, his arms crossed

"We're 20 minutes early what are you talking about?" I asked.

"I've been waiting for five minutes!" He pouted, making me roll my eyes at him.

I could truly see why he and Meg were perfect for each other. They were two of the most dramatic people I had ever met, while also being two of the goofiest. I was happy that they found each other, and I hoped that Ethan and I would finally manage to get the chance to have a relationship as happy as that.

"Is Ethan here?" I asked, my voice barely a whisper as I could feel myself getting nervous again at the thought of Ethan.

"Yes, he is," Jake whispered, mocking me.

"Stop it, she's freaking out and you're not helping," Meg said, glaring at her boyfriend before lightly hitting him on the arm.

"Kels relax, there's no need to freak out. Ethan will be so happy to see you," he said.

"I know that, I just, I've been waiting for this moment for ages and now I'm just so nervous," I admitted.  Talking about the matter with his best friend was embarrassing for me, but all that mattered in that moment was that Ethan and I were going to be reuniting.

"Come on, let's just go in and get this over with. Ethan's in the cafeteria with the rest of the team. They're having some food," Jake said as we all walked inside next to each other, my heart thumping like crazy.

"I need to use the bathroom first," I said, my voice shaky.

I was feeling nauseous, and if I didn't want to throw up, then I knew that I had to at least go and rinse my face before talking to him. I felt as if I were going to faint at any second, which certainly was not the way I wanted Ethan to see me.

"I'll come with you. Make sure you don't do anything stupid," Meg said as she walked behind me, her arm linking with mine as soon as she caught up to me. "Slow down. I thought you wanted to see Ethan. I know you're nervous, but now you're just being silly."

"I know Megs, I do. I don't know what's up with me," I said as we entered the bathroom. "I'm so afraid that Ethan's feelings towards me have changed. Maybe he still loves me, yeah, but not the way he used to. Maybe when he sees me he'll realise he doesn't feel the same way anymore," I admitted, feeling tears forming in my eyes as I let out everything I had been holding in ever since I actually left for New York.

Everyday I wondered if I had lost Ethan, or if he found somebody who made him realise that I wasn't as special, nor as important, as he thought I was. That was the exact same reason why I was so afraid to be with him in the first place. I didn't want myself to feel lost without him, but that was exactly how I had felt for as long as I spent away from him.

"Kelsey, that's ridiculous. What you and Ethan have is so special. Not even Jake and I have that connection, you two are everyone's definition of an amazing relationship," she said, honesty written all over her features.

I nodded with a smile before lightly rinsing my face with cold water, Meg's words giving me the courage that I needed. Meg and I snapped our heads up as we heard one of the stalls click opening, my heart sinking as I realised that somebody had heard my conversation with Meg. My cheeks reddened as I saw Bella coming out.

I couldn't believe that out of all the people who could have been in the bathroom in that exact moment, it had to be Bella, the captain of the cheerleaders. A frown formed on my face as I heard her snickering, my mind instantly coming to the conclusion that she thought I was making a complete fool of myself.

"I couldn't help overhearing your conversation, I just thought it was so cute," she said, pouting at the last part. "I thought it was cute that you think that you and Ethan have something. Who even are you?" She laughed, making my eyes brim with tears once more.

"She's someone more important to him then you'll ever be," Meg said, coming to my defense as soon as she saw the distraught look on my face.

"Are you sure about that? You see, Ethan and I have gotten pretty close lately, we're practically together. He doesn't care about losers like you. Ethan's popular, if he really did want a thing with her he would have made sure to let the whole world know," she maliciously said.

My heart sank as I realised that she had a point. Ethan always made sure to have everybody know when he was dating someone, and more importantly, who he was dating. Nobody even knew about our relationship, and even if I didn't think much about it at the time, now I found myself wondering whether he was ashamed of me.

"You're such a witch," Meg spat, walking dangerously close to Bella.

"No honey, I'm not. I'm just speaking the truth. Ethan doesn't need people like you. Every cheerleader is at his feet, I just happen to be the one who got his heart," she said before showing me a photo of her and Ethan laughing together from her phone before winking at me and strutting out of the bathroom.

I felt my heart shatter as she said the one thing which I was most afraid of hearing, making all of my insecurities float to the surface. Meg tried to talk to me and calm me down, telling me not to listen to a word she said, but I didn't want to hear it. I walked out of the bathroom and wiped the tears from my face, not wanting to give Bella the satisfaction of seeing me cry.

I found myself feeling foolish to even think that Ethan and I could have started back from where we left off, but if my relationship with Ethan had taught me anything, it was that people can do anything to hurt others. That was exactly why I had to talk to the person in question himself. If he truly preferred being with Bella, then I wanted to hear it coming out of his mouth, and not hers.

My vision kept getting blurry as the tears streamed down nonstop. I didn't quite know where I was going, but what I did know was that I had to find Ethan as soon as possible. I froze as soon as I heard his voice, my head shooting up as his eyes met mine. His eyes widened as soon as he caught sight of me, the bottle of water he was holding in his hands falling to the floor with a thud.

I could see his eyes becoming red as his mouth parted, clearly in shock of finding me there in front of him. It took a lot not to go up to him and wrap my arms around him, and as we stood there looking at each other, neither one of us saying anything, I couldn't help but mentally beg him not to break my heart.

A/N: Hey guys, don't kill me. So I know I said this would be the last chapter, however something came up and I had to update late so instead of making one long chapter I decided to split it in two so I wouldn't update that late, that and I'm really tired so I know that the chapter wouldn't come out the same way I wanted it to.

To some extents I even think this chapter came out a bit shitty but I had to give you guys something so. Sorry if there are any mistakes, I have a huge headache and I wasn't really concentrating but I promise you that next chapter will be perfect. I already have all the ideas.

Anyways, this could somehow be good for some of you that don't want the book to end. More chapters am I right? c;

Anywho yeah, I'm sorry I couldn't make the author's not funny, as I said before I'm not concentrating so I'm just going to head off to sleep.

Stay perfect,

I love all of you guys,

~M