21

Lisa was incredibly busy that whole week. Despite not having classes yet, she wouldn't be able to start back on her dance major until next semester, though she did swing by the dance studio and ran into Jimin who surprisingly hugged her and told her he missed fighting over the room with the good speakers with her and that he missed the competition because everyone else was incompetent.

Lisa had giggled and they caught up and she even spent the evening rehearsing with him over his new routine. Lisa was spent but it felt good to finally, truly dance again.

She felt bad for yelling at Rosie that first night she had gotten back because she was entirely too sweet. Once Lisa had come back and calmed down enough she showed Lisa her surprise.

The room attached next to hers was converted into an office for Lisa to do her editing. Gong-Yoo had sent a state of the art computer with all the software she might need and Rosie had set it all up for her, even choosing the perfect desk for her and printing out a few of Lisa's favorite photographs and putting them on the wall.

Lisa almost cried when she saw it. She hugged Chaeyoung tight and told her thank you. Incredibly grateful that her best friend had gone out of her way to do all of that for her.

It didn't keep Lisa from looking for apartments that whole week though. She couldn't possibly stay here when she knew Jennie would just hate having her here.

Lisa was having no luck despite spending half of her day's searching for a decent place though. It was the middle of the semester in a busy city like Seoul and everything that wasn't super sketchy was already taken.

Chaeyoung caught her looking up apartments one of those times and the pouty sad look she got in response made Lisa's heart drop. Especially since her best friend didn't say anything about it, she just set the tea down she had made for her because she thought Lisa looked stressed.

"Rosie wait." Lisa said as Chaeyoung left a little teary eyed.

"I'm going to the studio to record some stuff Lis. I'll see you tonight." Chaeyoung said hastily, closing the door before Lisa saw her cry.

Lisa sighed, knowing she had hurt her feelings.

She couldn't stay though, how could she. It wasn't even the matter of her broken heart. It was also the fact Jennie had avoided her so much for an entire year, so much so that she didn't even bother to talk to her on the phone.

How could Lisa suddenly decide to live in the same house as her. Lisa felt like she was invading Jennie's space. She was here first and clearly she didn't want anything to do with Lisa and Lisa had way too much pride to force herself into her life like that. So she kept searching.

It was obvious Jennie didn't want her here. She hadn't seen her all week. Lisa knew Jennie was in the house, she could sometimes hear the soft music coming from a room next to Jennie's bedroom. Lisa figured that was probably Jennie's office. Her room and Lisa's room probably had the same layout with the office attached to it.

Lisa heard her come out once. She heard quick little pads on the floor going into the kitchen. Lisa had left her door open because she was waiting for Chaeyoung to come home so she could apologize and talk.

Jennie was probably making coffee.

Then Jennie's phone rang and she heard Jennie squeak and run back into her office, quickly closing the door. She never came back out.

Lisa had gone into the kitchen to get some water and she saw the coffee she had made still sitting there, left untouched.

_________

They had all been too busy this last week to give Lisa a proper welcome back dinner. It had been planned for the day she got back but considering the whole moving in with your ex debacle had happened it had gone to waste. So both Jisoo and Chaeyoung had found themselves trying to convince their respective "sisters" to come out and actually have a family dinner for once.

"She doesn't want me here Jisoo. You heard her yourself. She's trying to move out just because I live here. I don't want to make her uncomfortable. You guys celebrate."

"Stop being stubborn its just a fucking dinner! You're adults, you can get through one dinner!" Jisoo protested.

______

"She didn't even touch her coffee Rosie! You know she's obsessed with coffee. That's how afraid she is of seeing me. She won't come out of her room, she's probably starving. You guys have dinner together." Lisa said, not looking up from her computer.

"The whole point of this dinner is that it's your welcome back party Lis! We can't welcome you back if you're not there!" Chaeyoung countered.

___________

"I have a plan." Jisoo told Chaeyoung that night as she held her in their master bedroom.

"What is it?"

"We don't tell them the other one is going? Hell we already didn't tell them they would be living together, what's one more lie." Jisoo said matter of factly.

"How are we going to manage that? We all live in the same house." Chaeyoung pointed out.

"You and Jendeukie cook and I'll take Limario out for the alcohol and when its ready we'll come back and then it'll be too awkward for either of them to leave. They both think the other one doesn't want them there right?"

"Right."

"So they'll probably argue over who gets to leave and then you can jump in with your emotional manipulation stuff and they'll have to stay."

"I don't emotionally manipulate." Chaeyoung said pouting.

"Baby, you're the queen of that stuff but only because you can read everyone so well and we never know what's coming. You probably don't know you do it because what's so obvious to you is completely over our heads most of the time." Jisoo laughed.

"I feel bad now."

"Don't. If it wasn't for you we'd all be emotionally stunted. Well, we are, but we'd never get past it." Jisoo said laughing.

"I love you." Chaeyoung said, pecking Jisoo's lips.

"I love you too chipmunk."

"I know things are messed up right now, but I'm really happy. I have you and Lisa's back and even though Jennie's freaking out I can tell she looks a little more alive now."

"I know. I feel like I was living with the half-dead for a year." Jisoo said grimacing as she remembered the way Jennie went through the motions for the entire year.

"We can do this, what's one more disaster dinner. At least Jennie can't cut Lisa off in the parking lot this time." Chaeyoung giggled.

"Idiots. I can't believe they argued over that for so long. I hope it doesn't take that long this time because I really couldn't stand it."

"I don't think it will. They love each other too much. As much as Lisa wants to pretend she wants to leave she really doesn't. If she did she'd probably go stay at your old apartment with her assistant."

"That's true. I guess it's all false bravado."

"Of course it is. She leaves her door open in the office and she's claimed several times that it's so she knows when I get home because we hardly have had time to catch up but I know it's really because she just wants to get a glimpse of Jennie."

"I caught Jendeukie stalking Lisa's instagram again the other day." Jisoo laughed. "She broke her phone screen trying to hide it when I opened the door to her office."

"If they would just talk honestly! I get why Jennie is doing what she's doing but still, they're both miserable."

"Maybe we should resort to extreme measures."

"Like what."

"Like locking them down in the bomb shelter until they figure it out."

"You have a bomb shelter?" Chaeyoung asked in awe and Jisoo only smirked. "Kim Jisoo do you really have a bomb shelter?"

Jisoo kissed her on the lips. "Goodnight chipmunk."

"Jisoo." Chaeyoung whined, eyes wide, "Do you really have a bomb shelter?"

Jisoo smirked and whispered into Rosie's ear, "If you promise to do the thing, I'll show it to you."

Chaeyoung nodded wildly and Jisoo internally high fived herself. If she had known that would have worked she would have shown it to Rosie a long time ago.

___________

Jisoo and Lisa were out getting alcohol for dinner and Lisa found that now was probably the time to break it to her.

"So, you know how I leased your apartment out?" Lisa asked.

"Yeah, for your assistant right?" Jisoo answered absentmindedly.

"Yes." Lisa said nervously. "You know my assistant actually."

"Really? Who?" Jisoo asked, handing all the alcohol bags for Lisa to carry on her own as they walked to the car. Jisoo smirked when Lisa didn't protest.

"Kai."

Jisoo cackled. "Funny. I'm surprised you could even say his name without throwing up."

Jisoo opened the back seat door for her so Lisa could load up the alcohol and everything else they bought.

"I'm serious. I ran into him in Jeju and he's my assistant now. We're sort of friends." Lisa said making a nervous face again.

"Get in the car Limario or we're going to be late." Jisoo said, rolling her eyes at her.

Lisa sighed. Well, at least now Jisoo won't be surprised when she gets a check with his name on it when the rent is due.

_________

"I missed this." Chaeyoung said as they finished cooking.

"Missed what?" Jennie asked.

"Cooking with you, having dinner together."

"We always have dinner together." Jennie giggled.

"No, Jisoo and I have dinner together and you would occasionally join us and eat hastily and then go lock yourself up in your room right afterwards. I'm glad Lisa's back. You're starting to become yourself again."

Jennie sighed. She was glad Lisa was back too but that neutral look Lisa shot at her and her angry words after that argument with Chaeyoung haunted her every night.

"I'm glad she's back too." Jennie whispered.

Chaeyoung turned to her, grabbing Jennie's face and making her look at her.

"Jennie unnie. I know you're just trying to protect her. I get it. I do, I know Lisa will just blame herself. It's the same reason why she left early for her trip, she thought you went back to your father because of her. I won't lie, you're right. She will feel guilty, but she loves you and I think you two not being together will hurt her more than simple guilt. Just tell her."

"She's been gone for a year Rosie. She's totally over me by now." Jennie said, rolling her eyes even as her heart clenched at the thought.

"Are you over her?" Chaeyoung asked knowingly.

Jennie blushed. "Just because I'm not over her doesn't mean she isn't over me. She didn't do anything wrong to me, she was perfect whereas I went and called her a cheater when she clearly isn't and then told her I didn't trust her, of course she's over me."

"If that were true do you think she would have freaked out so much when she found out you live here too."

Jennie shrugged, "I broke her heart, of course she freaked out. I was selfish the last night she was here and asked her to—well let's just say we were intimate and then I broke up with her right after and told her I wasn't in love with her yet." Jennie finished blushing again and swallowing the disgust at herself as she remembered having to get dressed and rip herself away from Lisa to tell her those things.

They heard the door open and Jennie almost ran to Jisoo, knowing she was coming with the alcohol. She needed a drink after that conversation. She froze when she saw who was with her, then proceeded to squeak and frantically ran back into the kitchen to hide.

_______

Lisa froze as soon as she saw a skipping cute little baby brat come into the living room as soon as they had opened the door to Jisoo's house. Lisa had almost dropped the alcohol. It was only the second time she had seen her since she had been back and Jennie still managed to leave her breathless with her presence.

Jennie froze as soon as she saw them and then squeaked and ran away and Lisa had found the sight so adorable, if it wasn't for the fact Jennie had literally just ran away from her.

Lisa frowned. Her heart dropping.

"I don't think I'm in the mood for dinner anymore," Lisa mumbled. "I thought she wasn't going to be here."

"You're going to waste my chipmunk's effort at welcoming you back and make her cry again Limario?" Jisoo threatened her.

Lisa felt guilty, "I guess not."

"Come on. We'll wait in the dining room."

Lisa shuffled behind Jisoo dejectedly. Jisoo started setting the table. It looked like the girls had left some of the side dishes out already but hadn't been able to put everything out. Lisa set the alcohol down and started helping Jisoo.

The conversation from the kitchen drifted over to them though and Lisa couldn't help but catch snippets of it.

________

Jennie looked for a place to hide once she padded into the kitchen, unnecessarily because it's not like Lisa hadn't seen her already.

She tried to open the door to the pantry to jump in there but Chaeyoung shut the door on her before she could. Jennie pouted, looking panicked.

"Lisa's here Rosie! I have to hide!" Jennie said urgently.

Chaeyoung shook her head at the look of sheer panic on Jennie's face.

"She's having dinner with us."

"She's what?" Jennie's voice went high pitched again. "Jisoo said she would be out!"

"It's her welcome back dinner Jennie. This is all for her."

"Oh god." Jennie wondered if she could jump on the counter and go through the opening in the bar so she could sneak out. "Help me Rosie!"

"Help you do what?" Chaeyoung giggled.

"Sneak out!" Jennie hissed conspiratorially.

"Why do you want to sneak out?" Chaeyoung asked amused.

"Because it's her welcome back dinner! I can't ruin it!" Jennie said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Chaeyoung rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "Why do you think you're going to ruin it Jennie?"

"She doesn't want me here Rosie! She's trying to move out because I live here, why would I crash her dinner! Damn it. I shouldn't have listened to stupid Chu and stayed in my room. I can't believe I trusted her when I know better. I'm going to steal her controller so she can't play her games. Save me some leftovers?" Jennie asked because she was kind of starving. She was fully prepared to jump that counter and book it to her room but Chaeyoung held her back.

"You're staying."

"Rosieee." Jennie whined, stomping the floor and pouting.

"Stay. You're jumping to conclusions. If she asks you to leave then you can leave. Okay?" Chaeyoung asked.

"I can't take that kind of rejection Rosie. My heart would break." Jennie whispered out seriously. "I'll cry for like a week straight. Let me just jump the counter." Jennie said again trying to do just that.

She pouted again when Chaeyoung held her in place by the wrist.

"Do you really think Lisa would kick you out?" Chaeyoung asked knowingly.

"No." Jennie pouted. "She's too nice for that but I also don't want her to be sad I'm there, or I guess not sad but mad. She hates me Rosie."

"Look, how about you just help me put the food out and then if you really want to sneak to your room afterwards you can, okay?" Chaeyoung asked. All she needed was for them to see each other again. She figured that might be enough to get them to realize they were both being stupid.

Jennie looked at her apprehensively.

"Come on, please unnie. I need help. You're just laying the food out and then you can make an excuse and leave if you really want to."

Jennie felt the panic but she nodded anyway. Lisa would probably think it weird if she jumped the counter anyway. She would probably think she was still in the kitchen eavesdropping on them, the only way out was through.

Jennie grabbed as much as she could and took it into the dining room.

Jisoo and Lisa were already sitting at the table and Jisoo had poured them a shot of soju and they were currently clinking glasses as they took it.

"Already starting without us?" Chaeyoung teased.

Jennie avoided Lisa's eyes as she set down what they had cooked. She hastily went back into the kitchen to get the rest of it. Jennie could feel Lisa's eyes on her as she set down the second round of food and Jennie almost dropped it out of nerves.

"Well, you guys enjoy." Jennie said, still avoiding Lisa's eyes. "I—I have to go s—study so. I'll see you guys later." Jennie said hastily, her voice almost squeaking again, trying to bolt but a voice stopped her.

"You're not going to eat?" Lisa asked.

"Oh—well—um. I can eat later." Jennie stuttered out and she really wanted to slap herself for not being able to form a coherent sentence right now.

"Did you make all of this?" Lisa asked again and Jennie was looking at everywhere but at Lisa.

"Rosie helped." Jennie managed out.

"I handed her things while she cooked." Chaeyoung said giggling. "She's being modest."

"Stay." Lisa said and Jennie's heart might have stopped.

"Oh—I don't want to intrude on your welcome back dinner." Jennie said blushing.

"Are you not happy I'm back?" Lisa teased.

"Me?" Jennie's voice was so high now she could probably voice a cartoon character. "No. I mean yes. Yes. So happy. Super happy. I mean—not super happy. A moderate amount of happy. An appropriate amount of happy. Welcome back." Jennie finished and she could have slapped herself for that rant.

She would definitely be screaming into her pillow in embarrassment later because she never was herself around Lisa. Jennie had never stuttered in her entire life, up until she met Lisa.

"Then you can't miss it can you? Especially since you cooked it all." Lisa offered, eyes glinting. Finding a flustered Jennie so fucking adorable. "I can't eat knowing the cook isn't eating what she made."

Jennie missed Lisa's adoring look because she was still avoiding looking directly at Lisa.

"Okay. Since you can't eat." Jennie said, sitting down awkwardly, right across from Lisa. "I guess I'm hungry now anyway."

Jennie didn't know how she was going to get through dinner without choking. Especially since she got hot every time she felt Lisa's gaze on her. She was hyper aware of her, she felt it every time. It was as if Lisa was trying to read her.

The tension was thick and she was glad when Jisoo finally cut in.

"So Limario, tell us about your trip. Did you meet anyone interesting?"

"So many people." Lisa said excitedly.

Chaeyoung opened the wine, they would save the soju for later. Jennie looked at her gratefully when she served Jennie a glass of wine.

Jennie almost downed the whole thing in one go she was so nervous.

"What was your favorite place Lis?" Chaeyoung asked, completely interested.

Jennie had so many questions for Lisa too and she was so glad her friends were getting her to talk. Jennie yearned to know how Lisa had spent the last year without them. Without her.

"Honestly I couldn't even pick. I guess it depends on the criteria. If you're talking about beautiful scenery. El Salvador is really beautiful, I was near the coast. Everyone is super poor where I stayed, their houses were made of wood and tarps and sheets of aluminum but I met so many kind people who despite their poverty were actually happy. They took me out to see the beach and I was practically burned to a crisp afterwards because the sun is so harsh there but I had one of the best days of my life."

Jennie didn't realize she was staring as she watched Lisa talk. Forgetting to avoid her eyes now because Lisa, a passionate Lisa was mesmerizing. She was grinning and there was a sparkle in her eye and Jennie decided that the ache she felt at having lost Lisa for making the decision she made was worth it after all. Lisa had been happy. She had traveled the world and helped people and she was probably about to become some major photographer now.

Lisa's smile was contagious and Jennie couldn't help but smile softly too as she talked. She might have fallen a little harder and even though that smile wasn't being directed at her, even though Jennie wasn't the reason she was smiling. Jennie allowed herself a little bit of happiness at being some part of the reason for it. Even though her father had almost sabotaged Lisa, Jennie had found Gong-Yoo. She felt an overwhelming pride for Lisa right now.

"Yemen too, there's this village carved out of the mud rock cliffs, it's beautiful, I can't wait to show you the pictures." Lisa continued. "They all had their charms of course. Most of Syria was devastated and it makes me sad because they had beautiful architecture before."

"Please don't remind me of Yemen." Chaeyoung said sadly. "I thought you were dead for like a month and a half."

"You shouldn't have worried so much Chaengie. Yemen was cake, I wasn't even that close to the missiles, I was in the middle of the city and they hit the north end. I was a few miles away from the blast. That wasn't even anything. I almost got taken by drug lords once!" Lisa blurted out. Then her eyes widened when she realized what she had just admitted.

"You what?!" Jennie and Chaeyoung both shouted in unison and Lisa flinched.

"It was fine!" Lisa backtracked. "I had a good bodyguard named Santos! He saved me!"

"A twelve year old Lisa!" Jennie shouted, scolding her. "You had a twelve year old protecting you?! You're such an idiot! You could have died."

Jennie forgot she wasn't supposed to know about him. She wasn't supposed to admit she knew all the kids Lisa posted about by heart because she constantly stalked Lisa's instagram. She was too worried freaking out about Lisa getting kidnapped.

"Twelve?" Chaeyoung asked Jennie.

"Santos is a twelve year old boy with a rifle and this idiot probably carted him around while she went and took her pictures in dangerous places like the idiot she is!" Jennie scolded Lisa, forgetting she really wasn't allowed to do that anymore. She was too livid. "I'm grilling more meat. We're running out."

Jennie abruptly got up from the table and started walking to the kitchen, she paused, turned back to grab her wine glass and a whole bottle of wine and walked into the kitchen.

Lisa looked guilty as she watched Jennie walk away.

"Is that true Lisa?" Chaeyoung asked.

Lisa shrugged in response.

"I knew you would be reckless! I told you not to be reckless." Chaeyoung scolded her.

"I'm back safe and sound!" Lisa protested.

"How close was it?" Chaeyoung probed.

"What do you mean?" Lisa asked nervously.

"How close of a call was it?" Chaeyoung asked.

Lisa didn't answer, looking down at the table and Chaeyoung got her answer right away. Too close. It was probably a miracle that Lisa was even here.

Chaeyoung grabbed her own wine glass and followed Jennie into the kitchen.

She found her leaning against the counter and silently crying.

"Jennie?" Chaeyoung asked tentatively and Jennie launched herself into Chaeyoung's arms. Trying to not let the sobs out.

"She was reckless because of me wasn't she?" Jennie said in a voice so soft and broken Chaeyoung started crying too.

"She's like that anyway Jennie. You can't blame yourself."

"She could have died Rosie, or worse. I looked it up. I researched what went on there and they torture people. I was so worried and I thought she was okay because she was posting but she almost got kidnapped? I don't know what I would have done Rosie. I don't think I could breathe if she didn't come back."

"Sshhh. It's okay. She's back now. Your idiot is back in one piece despite her being so reckless and stupid."

__________

Lisa swirled her own wine glass on the table, staring at it blankly. She didn't understand it. Jennie worrying about her. Jennie keeping tabs on her and even knowing about Santos. Jisoo broke her out of her reverie.

"So you'll stay now? You'll live with us." Jisoo asked. "You won't look for any other apartments now that you know Jendeukie wants you here."

Lisa nodded slowly. Still not believing it.

"They drove me crazy you know. I think I have several gray hairs now. They were so worried about you the entire time. I didn't even know who to comfort." Jisoo said honestly. It had been a tough year.

"I'm sorry Jisoo. Sometimes I wonder if I should have gone." Lisa said honestly because the stress on all of her friends' faces had not gone unnoticed by Lisa.

"Do you regret it?" Jisoo asked because the look of worry on Lisa's face was evident.

"No. It was the greatest experience of my life. I learned a lot, met so many good people. Saw so much tragedy that it makes me want to be better every day, but I hate what it did to you guys. To Rosie." To Jennie.

"Then stop looking so sad. You fulfilled your dream didn't you?"

"Yeah. I thought my dream was winning that award but it turns out it was that trip. Just getting to experience everything and getting even the most minuscule chance to help them."

Jisoo poured them a shot of soju each.

"Tell me about you almost getting kidnapped. You really are an idiot." Jisoo said fondly.

The girls came back and she noticed both of their eyes were red rimmed and Lisa wanted nothing more than to go around the table and hug Jennie to her chest.

"I don't know if I should." Lisa said in concern.

"You'll talk about it in your photo book anyway." Jennie said without looking at Lisa, having overheard what Jisoo had asked her. "We'll find out either way. We might as well hear it from your own mouth so we don't freak out as much."

Lisa realized Jennie had a point.

She watched the girl she was still so utterly in love with take a sip of her wine to brace herself and Lisa poured Jisoo and herself a shot of soju to brace herself too.

She sighed and launched into the story.

_______________

Lisa had been in El Salvador for a week already and she hadn't been able to call back home yet to let Rosie know she was okay. There was really no reception where she had been.

Lisa was excited to be in a new country, she had already taken endless pictures but all the excitement of being in a new place and meeting new people was always drained from her at night. She dreamt of Jennie every single night. The dreams were awful though, they were always of Jennie sobbing and calling her a cheater and crumpling into herself and shouting for Lisa to leave her alone.

Lisa always woke up in a cold sweat.

She shared a room, if you could call it that, though Lisa didn't mind, with another fellow from a different organization. He was a writer. He always looked at her in concern, thinking she was getting sick or something.

"I'm good." Lisa assured him on the sixth day of her waking up like that.

That night they heard shots in the distance right as they had finally settled down to go to sleep. Lisa had been tossing and turning, getting restless sleep like she usually did so she was the first one awake. Lisa immediately got up and grabbed her camera.

Park Hyungsik woke up in a panic.

"What are you doing!"

"To take photographs, duh." Lisa said, adjusting her aperture because of the lack of light. She couldn't very well take her flash out there and expose herself.

"You're going to get yourself killed." Hyungsik said, following her out anyway, carrying his notepad and a pen.

"This is what we're here for."

Lisa got closer and closer to the shots and finally saw that a truck had pulled up near the edge of the village. Five grown men were taking cover behind the truck and shooting towards them.

There where about six kids and two adults fighting back. Pushing them out so they wouldn't come into the village, shooting with their rifles at them.

Lisa snapped shot after shot, she heard the scribble of Hyungsik's pencil on his notepad as he kept up with everything he could.

Lisa watched as one of the men from the village side got shot in the head. She wanted so bad to go out there and help but there was really nothing she could do except document it.

That is up until one of the kids got shot and Lisa couldn't hold it in anymore. She had captured it on camera and he fell to the ground, it seemed like it wasn't a major injury but he had been leading the charge and he was too close to the other guys. He was too exposed and it would only be a matter of time before he got shot in the head too. Lisa dropped her camera and ran.

"Lisa! Get back here!" Hyungsik yelled after her.

She watched as the kid kept shooting despite his injury.

Lisa almost got shot on her way to him too. She dropped to the ground and crawled most of the way to him, glad that the only light was coming from the moon so it made it hard to see.

She tried helping him up and he looked at her bewildered but accepted her help.

He'd been grazed in the leg, it was deep so he was limping hard but Lisa knew he could recover quickly. She took him as fast as she could to where she and Hyungsik had been hiding, shielding him from the shots with her body the whole time. Lisa had almost gotten shot again. She watched them rain on the ground right next to her as they hobbled as fast as they could to take cover. They finally made it and Lisa helped set him down.

They both knew they couldn't understand each other so they didn't really speak. Lisa just ripped a part of her shirt off and wrapped it around his leg to stop the bleeding. Eventually the shots stopped ringing out.

Lisa was devastated to find out two of the fourteen year olds had died. Another little boy that could have been no older than eleven had gotten shot too but it wasn't critical.

Lisa found out the kid she helped was named Santos. The translator told her he was alone. His father got pulled into the drug gang out of desperation to feed his family and ended up beheaded. His mother was kidnapped and he hadn't seen her in six years.

"Yo creo esta muerta." Santos said. "Ojalá y este muerta por que si no..." He trailed off.

"He said he thinks she's probably dead." The translator offered. "He said he hopes she is because if she isn't—well, he didn't finish but out here, the alternative is much worse as you can probably imagine."

"Where do you live?" Lisa asked, and the translator asked Santos for her.

He pointed to a little aluminum house, it was even smaller than the other ones.

"Why does he fight? Did he get recruited?"

"Si no soy soldado me llevan con ellos y tengo que vender droga." Santos said. "Después me dan el cuchillo o peor como a mi jefe."

"He said if he didn't become a soldier the drug lords would eventually take him to sell drugs. That eventually he'll get the knife or worse like his father."

Lisa kept asking questions and taking pictures. It seemed Santos really liked taking pictures because he would pose and Lisa would giggle.

He had a sense of humor and despite being shot he kept hitting on Lisa through the translator.

"You're literally twelve. Wait till you're at least twenty."

"He said that he'll be your boyfriend when he's twenty and that you can't go back on your promise."

"That is so not what I said!" Lisa said indignantly, laughing with them.

______

Despite not being able to talk to each other Lisa walked around with Santos and he showed her all the interesting places he knew.

"Drogas." He pointed.

Lisa knew what that meant now. It must be one of the houses that housed a drug lord or somebody under them that worked for them. They usually had the nicer houses, the ones actually made out of cement or at least adobe.

The window was opened and Lisa could see them laying out the powder and working. She took several pictures and even got one of their faces.

"Lets go." Lisa said, before they got caught and Santos nodded.

They did that a lot, he would point out some of the houses, carrying his little rifle. Despite Lisa trying to leave him behind he always found her. She was worried for him but he was adamant about being her bodyguard after she helped him escape that first time.

She couldn't shake him so eventually she just used him as a guide.

__________

Lisa was woken up abruptly, water being thrown in her face. She immediately felt rough hands holding her own behind her back.

It was the middle of the night and once her eyes adjusted she saw two men standing over her, one of them moved to tie her hands behind her back. The other one used the barrel of a gun to knock Hyungsik out, who in all the commotion had come to.

Lisa didn't know what they were saying but it was definitely not good, she could tell they were calling her names and insulting her and Lisa was sure she was fucked.

She almost didn't find it in herself to care.

She was glad they left Hyungsik behind. They had become friends, he was a sweet guy that carried a picture of his girlfriend everywhere he went and talked about her to anyone who would listen. He was planning on proposing to her as soon as he got back. Lisa would have hated if he didn't make it to her, she had even said hello to her on the phone once and she begged Lisa to make him be careful.

The men harshly threw her in the back of a truck. Now that her eyes adjusted she recognized them. It was two of the drug dealers from the village she had accidentally caught in the act with her camera.

She felt the barrel of a gun pressed to the back of her head.

"No te muevas o te mato."

Lisa didn't know what that meant but context clues told her he had just threatened to kill her.

They started driving off with her and Lisa knew enough from Santos now that the direction they were going in was not good. It was were the ruthless big boss lived and whatever was coming for Lisa was not pleasant. It was going to be brutal and the better option would be to just beg to be killed. She almost tried to fight the guy so he would shoot her because there were way too many stories of what he did to people.

Lisa thought about it for a second and decided fuck it, she might as well go down trying. She threw her whole weight into the body behind her. Since the truck was moving he completely got caught off balance despite kneeling behind her. A shot rang out. He had almost shot Lisa. The gun went flying because the truck stopped suddenly, the driver having heard the shot.

Lisa's hands were still tied behind her back so she couldn't grab the gun. The best she could do was ram her shoulder into the guy again who had started clambering up to reach it. Lisa landed on top of him as soon as she rammed into him.

He started strangling her from behind as the driver of the truck ran out, jumping over the bed of the truck. He was almost to the gun.

Lisa was choking anyway. Maybe a shot to the head was better because choking and suffocating to death really wasn't the best way to go. Lisa wouldn't recommend it. Zero out of ten stars. She still managed to kick out with a leg in desperation and hit the driver's shin. He doubled over in pain and cursed at her. He reached for the gun again. Lisa was already seeing black from the guy under her, still choking her.

Another shot rang out and Lisa watched as the driver swayed and his body fell over the edge of the bed of the truck. He took a shot to the head. Lisa tried to ignore the fact some of his blood was on her now. She should have been a little more preoccupied at the fact she was dying but having someone's brains on your boot wasn't pleasant.

Lisa started blacking out.

She heard shouts and a second later, right before she passed out she saw a twelve year old Santos jump over the bed of the truck and aim his gun at the guy behind her.

"Sueltala o te doy un buen putazo en la frente como a tu amigo." Santos threatened.

The man wouldn't let her go until he felt the bed of the truck shake and another man and one of Santos' friends climbed the bed of the truck and aimed their guns at him too. He finally let Lisa go, holding his hands up in surrender.

Lisa choked and coughed and gasped for breath.

Her little friend Santos helped her up, taking her back to the village.

Lisa heard a shot when they were ten paces away. She didn't turn around to look. She knew they had shot the other guy too.

"Esta bien?" Santos asked in concern.

Lisa nodded and clapped him on the shoulder in gratitude and he grinned.

He raised his eyebrow as he asked something and Lisa giggled because she knew, she just knew he was hitting on her again and was probably using the fact he just saved her as leverage.

She put her arm around him and kissed him on the cheek and she watched him blush and Lisa laughed again because for such a forward kid the fact a cheek kiss made him blush was hilarious considering that's the way people greeted each other in Latin America.

It was completely different from Korea. Lisa had to adjust quickly. When you said hello or good morning or goodnight in El Salvador it was usually accompanied by a cheek kiss, even if they were strangers. It was a far cry from all the skinship rules Korea had.

________

"He saved my life." Lisa finished.

Jennie and Chaeyoung were both crying. Jisoo looked on in concern.

"That wasn't the only time was it Lisa? That you almost died?" Jennie asked, boring her eyes into Lisa's.

Lisa gulped and shook her head no.

Jennie poured herself another glass of wine and downed it in one go again.

"I'm going to go wash the dishes." Jennie said, gathering what she could.

"You cooked Jennie. I'll get them." Chaeyoung protested.

"I'll help her. You guys hang in the living room." Lisa said, getting up too.

"It's fine Lisa. It's your dinner. Go with them." Jennie said stubbornly, walking into the kitchen.

Lisa followed her anyway.

"Are you mad?" Lisa asked nervously.

Jennie turned around abruptly.

"You said you would be careful!" Jennie shouted.

"I was baby brat."

"You call that being careful?! Being kidnapped and almost shot in the head and choked to death being careful!" Jennie asked incredulously. "How many times did you almost die?"

Lisa avoided her eyes.

"You don't even know do you? Because it was probably more times than you could count!" Jennie scolded her. "I shouldn't have let you go."

Jennie went to the sink, trying to wash the dishes but she was so angry she dropped a plate and it cracked in half.

Jennie started crying.

Lisa's resolve broke. She went to go hug Jennie but Jennie shoved her off.

"Stop." Jennie said brokenly. She didn't need Lisa hugging her right now because if she did Jennie would jump into her arms and never let go and Lisa wouldn't want that.

"Sorry." Lisa mumbled, her heart breaking.

"I'll move out tomorrow Lisa. So you can stay here. I don't. I can't. You deserve to stay here. I don't."

"Jennie, you were here first." Lisa said honestly despite her heart breaking.

"Why does that matter? You deserve to live with Rosie. I've had a year with them. It's your turn."

Jennie shuffled out of the kitchen, leaving the dishes untouched. She couldn't be in that room with Lisa for much longer. She was breaking. All she wanted was to have her back.

"Jennie?"

Jennie froze again. She gulped.

"Yeah?" She asked, not turning around and trying to discreetly wipe away the tears that were falling.

"Don't move out." Lisa said softly.

Jennie turned around after wiping all the tears away.

"Why not? You said it yourself that the mere sight of me physically hurts you." Jennie said, her voice laced with hurt.

Lisa flinched. She didn't know Jennie had heard that. The look of pain on Jennie's face made Lisa's heart shatter. Lisa was about to apologize and tell her she hadn't meant it because she hadn't. Yes it hurt to see her because they weren't together anymore but Lisa would still rather have an ex-girlfriend Jennie than have no Jennie at all. Jennie cut her off before she could.

"It's okay Lisa. I deserve that. I hurt you. I don't want to hurt you anymore though. I can't bear it. I'll be out by tomorrow night so don't worry."

Jennie left the kitchen quickly after that and Lisa was rooted to her spot. Not knowing what to do. The confusion and the devastation and the hurt taking over.

She was confused because Jennie had avoided her for an entire year yet here she was crying because Lisa had almost died. She was devastated that Jennie was trying to move out.

She was hurt because all she wanted was for her to be able to go back in time and take the trip back because having Jennie looking so broken and sad in front of her superseded any other need for Lisa.

She wished she could have told herself not to go to that wedding and to not take the fellowship. Maybe then she and Jennie would be okay. Maybe instead of crying alone in a kitchen Lisa would have just celebrated her one year anniversary a couple of days ago with Jennie.

________

A/N

It's a rollercoaster of emotions 😅