22

Lisa walked into the living room and Chaeyoung was waiting for her.

"What happened?" Chaeyoung asked in worry, not having missed the way Jennie had stormed out of the kitchen and into her room or the way Lisa looked like she had shed some tears too. Jisoo had immediately followed after Jennie to ask her the same question.

Lisa sighed deeply, running her hand through her hair in frustration.

"She wants to move out. She overheard me yelling at you about her living here. She heard me say the mere sight of her hurts me." Lisa said, voice cracking.

"Talk to her Lisa." Chaeyoung pleaded.

"And say what?"

"The truth."

"What truth? That I'm still in love with her. That I haven't spent a single day this last year not thinking about her and I want her back." Lisa said in annoyance.

"Yes."

"That's ridiculous Rosie! She still thinks I cheated on her and I'm still hurt that she ghosted me anyway. I thought I meant more to her than that. I thought she at least would care about me as a friend at some point!"

"Lisa, she doesn't really believe that you cheated and she obviously still cares about you."

"Then why did she avoid me for a year? How do you explain that?" Lisa said, raising her voice again.

"Why don't you ask her? Did you even try? Have you even attempted to try and have an honest conversation with her about why she didn't speak to you the entire time yet she still hung on every word I would say anytime I would mention you?"

Lisa looked down sheepishly.

"Why would I? I'm nothing to her anymore. Clearly. She sent me enough hints by completely ghosting me once I left and now she wants to move out just to avoid me." Lisa said grumpily.

Chaeyoung lost her patience with them. Usually Jisoo's schemes were a little too extreme but her friends were being ridiculous right now.

Chaeyoung rushed up from the couch and got up to knock on Jennie's door. Jisoo opened it, she had followed Jennie so she could console her when she ran out of the kitchen. Chaeyoung could still hear Jennie crying inside.

"Bomb shelter. Now." Chaeyoung said to her girlfriend.

"You grab Limario, I'll get Jendeukie." Jisoo said, immediately understanding what Rosie was thinking. Jisoo tried hard not to smirk at the fact Rosie was actually going through with her plan.

Chaeyoung looped her arm around Lisa who had still been standing in the living room. She looked at her confused but followed her anyway.

"Just gotta show you something." Chaeyoung said hastily.

Chaeyoung led them to some secret stairs Lisa hadn't ever noticed before. Chaeyoung opened a reinforced steel door and Lisa looked at the room in awe as they went down more stairs. It was fully stocked. It looked like an underground apartment.

"Holy shit. Is this what I think it is?" Lisa asked as she looked around.

"Cool huh?" Chaeyoung asked, grinning because she had reacted the same way when Jisoo had showed her the underground bunker.

Lisa nodded as she took everything in, looking around in awe but she jumped in surprise when she heard a squealing Jennie.

"Put me down Jisoo!" Jennie shouted.

"Stop squirming Jendeukie! Before we both break our necks going down these stairs."

Lisa perked up and watched as Jisoo tried to drag a squirming Jennie in halfway down the stairs before letting her go.

Jennie almost lost her balance, swaying a bit before losing it completely and Lisa ran up the stairs and caught her from falling just in time.

Jennie froze in Lisa's arms, not realizing Lisa was down there too. She had been too busy fighting Jisoo.

Jisoo looked to Chaeyoung pointedly who sprinted up the stairs before the other two noticed what they were planning.

Lisa and Jennie recovered at the last second, pulling apart just as they watched Jisoo smirk and wave at them deviously, closing the door slowly.

"See you in a month!" Jisoo shouted before slamming the steel door shut.

"Jisoo!" Jennie shrieked, running up to the top of the stairs too.

Jisoo closed the door and locked it from the outside. She was the only one who knew the code, besides her chipmunk who she she had given it to when she gave her the tour. The girls were stuck down there unless they could guess it. Not even the army could blow through this door without that code.

"Jisoo!" Jennie banged on the door, trying to get out. "You can't lock me up down here! I have school!"

"It's a Friday Jendeuk! You don't have school until Monday!" Jisoo said through the intercom.

Jennie looked around and pressed the button to speak through it again, it had a video feed and she could see a smirking Jisoo on the screen.

"Get me out of here Jisoo." Jennie warned, glaring through the feed.

Jennie should have known her cousin would have bought a house with a bunker. Not because Jisoo was paranoid by any means, but the girl was so game obsessed she probably just thought it was cool and would end up testing a grenade on the door or something at some point just to see if it works. If Jennie had only realized sooner she wouldn't have fallen for this.

"Talk first. Then I'll think about it." Jisoo replied, still smirking.

"I have a test on Monday!" Jennie shrieked. "And there's a surgery scheduled for tomorrow I need to keep up with for Kanghoon! And I have to pack! And find an apartment! And I—"

"First of all Jendeukie, you're never getting out of there if you threaten to move out of my house again. There's enough rations down there for me to be an asshole and lock you up for two years. I even have a freezer down there with meat and if you're really careful with how much you eat you could probably survive for five instead of two if you really tried." Jisoo said matter of factly, like she hadn't just threatened to lock up her baby cousin and practically throw away the key.

"You wouldn't dare." Jennie said, narrowing her eyes.

"Jendeukie, you grew up with me. You really think I wouldn't?" Jisoo taunted.

Jennie huffed because given enough reason, Jisoo totally would.

"I'll be nice though. Two weeks should do it." Jisoo finished with her signature smirk again.

"Jisoooo!" Jennie whined again.

"Fine, just the weekend. You need a vacation anyway." Jisoo reasoned.

"Kim Jisoo! I'm telling my auntie you're the one that got me drunk when I was fourteen!" Jennie yelled.

"Tell her. I've done worse."

"Fine, I'll tell her you skipped summer camp when you were sixteen and lied to her and went backpacking through Europe instead!"

"She already knows, she found the pictures." Jisoo sighed. She had gotten an earful after that one. She had actually gotten grounded. Grounded! And her mom had confiscated all of her games from her for a month, Jisoo had never been so miserable in her life.

"I'm telling Rosie you almost killed Joohwangie!" Jennie finished frustratedly.

"You're staying in there until next week for that." Jisoo said and Jennie heard the click of the intercom and the video feed cut off.

"Jisoo!" Jennie yelled but she received no answer. "Damnit Jisoo!"

Jennie huffed, pouting.

"You're not my favorite cousin anymore!" Jennie shouted, pressing the button one more time but she got no reply again.

Lisa stood frozen halfway up the stairs. She was still trying to catch up to the fact rich people actually had these kinds of things let alone the fact she might be stuck down here with her ex girlfriend who she was totally still completely in love with.

_______

Jisoo smirked and led her girlfriend to the living room after her conversation with Jennie.

"Come on baby, let's watch the show." Jisoo said mischievously. This had been her plan all along after all. Free entertainment while her idiot friends figured out they were still in love with each other.

"You almost killed Joohwangie?" Rosie asked teary eyed.

Jisoo looked panicked, kissing her quickly. "She was bluffing."

"Jisoo?" Chaeyoung asked pouting.

"It was an accident babe, I swear!"

"What happened?"

"I got a little too drunk because you were gone and I missed you and I tipped over his bowl." Jisoo rushed out, wincing at the look Chaeyoung was giving her.

Chaeyoung looked like she was about to cry.

"I'm sorry chipmunk! You were gone for a week visiting your parents and I missed you. I was too drunk to function though so I had to call Jennie to help me refill the bowl and help me put him back."

"He almost suffocated to death?" Chaeyoung asked, tears falling now.

"Only for like a minute babe! I'm sorry. I didn't tell you because I didn't want to make you sad and I didn't want you to hate me. I took him to the vet! I swear! He said he'd be okay and that he probably didn't even feel it!" Jisoo rambled on.

"I'll never hate you Jisoo."

"Even if I had killed Joohwangie?" Jisoo asked dubiously, wiping Rosie's tears away.

"Even then, but please don't because I'll cry."

"Trust me, I've guarded Joohwangie with my life since then." Jisoo said seriously. She had panicked so much when it happened she had almost had a heart attack. Chaeyoung loved that damn fish.

Jisoo sat them down in the living room and turned the tv on to the security camera feeds and clicked on the one monitoring the bomb shelter.

"Babe, we can't spy on them."

"They can spy on us too if they try!" Jisoo reasoned. "The feed from the living room and the kitchen and the hallways goes down to the bomb shelter too. They can see all the security cameras from up here just like we can."

"Jisoo. This is wrong."

Jisoo shrugged, "I like being bad."

Chaeyoung shoved her playfully.

"Besides, we at least have to watch the first five minutes because I have a feeling my baby cousin is going to go into freak out mode and I need to know if I need to open that door and call an ambulance or not."

Chaeyoung had to admit she had a point.

_________

Jennie eventually got tired of banging on the door. She nervously turned around.

Lisa was curiously looking around the room, she had finally unfrozen from her spot. Despite it being smaller than the rest of Jisoo's enormous house. The bunker was still like a whole apartment.

The place was three times as big as Chaeyoung and her old dorm room. She opened a door and found a bathroom with a shower. There was a little staircase that took you up to a loft bed to make space. She had a kitchen and a dining room up three steps to their left and an office area right under the loft bed with a computer and there was a door to what she assumed was the freezer inside the kitchen. The couches wrapped around a huge t.v and there was a mini bar next to it.

Lisa really wondered why Jisoo even needed a bomb shelter in the first place but she had to admit it was cool. She could totally live down here.

She was admiring everything when she heard deep gasps and Lisa turned around in concern.

Jennie was sitting at the bottom of the steps, her forehead on her knees and Lisa thought she looked like she might be hyperventilating.

Lisa tentatively walked to her.

"Jennie? Are you okay?"

Jennie looked up and Lisa could tell she was fighting back tears.

"Yes." Jennie said but she shook her head no, like her body was betraying her and saying what she really wanted to say.

Lisa's heart melted at the sight.

Lisa looked around and found the fridge, taking out a bottled water and handing it to Jennie who tried to drink it but just ended up choking on it because she couldn't breathe properly.

Lisa took the bottle of water from her and tried to help her up but Jennie just panicked even more, gasping for air.

Lisa had seen panic attacks before. A lot of them this past year. Especially in Yemen from kids as the bombs rained down on them.

Lisa kneeled in front of Jennie.

"Hey, baby brat." Lisa said urgently, stroking Jennie's arms. "Focus on me."

Jennie couldn't look up.

"I'm here. You're safe. I'll get Jisoo to open the door. You just have to breathe first, try to take in deep slow breaths."

"I—can't." Jennie managed out, breathing even more erratically, gasping now but she felt like she wasn't pulling in any air..

"Okay, that's okay. You're having a panic attack. It'll pass. I know it feels awful right now but I promise you'll be okay."

"I think I'm dying Lisa. I can't breathe." Jennie said, the tears falling now.

"Look at me Jennie."

Jennie finally managed to look up again.

"Can you try to follow my breathing?"

Jennie shook her head no. Everything was too bright. Too much. There was no air and she felt like she was having a heart attack. She felt claustrophobic. Her chest ached and her lungs were empty and her ears were rushing.

"Tell me about your kids." Lisa said abruptly, hoping that would distract her.

"Kids?" Jennie gasped a shallow breath in again.

"The ones you helped get surgeries with your foundation. Tell me their names. From the very beginning. From the first one you helped save. Tell me their names in order."

Jennie started counting their names down. She had every single one of their names memorized. Their entire stories committed to memory.

Jennie said their names in order and Lisa started smiling as she threaded their hands together, lacing their fingers and Lisa started rubbing circles into Jennie's hands soothingly. By the time Jennie got to her last kid her breathing had become normal.

"If I hadn't already found you impressive before I definitely would have now." Lisa said honestly.

Jennie realized her chest stopped hurting and that she could breathe now. She no longer felt like she was having a heart attack. Jennie blushed at Lisa's words.

"You've been working overtime this year." Lisa said "You doubled the kids you've helped since I left."

Jennie shrugged. "I should have done better. I planned to do way more than that. I broke some promises this year." Jennie said sadly, her heart hurting for all the kids she ended up having to push back until next year or maybe even later if the doctors weren't available because of her father's meddling. "I could have if—" Jennie stopped herself. She almost had let slip out to Lisa about her father hijacking her foundation.

"If what?" Lisa asked curiously.

"If I wasn't so busy with other things." Jennie said as honestly as she could. If I wasn't so busy trying to keep my charity away from his clutches. If I wasn't so busy running his own non profit for him. If I wasn't so busy doing all of that in order to keep you safe and living out your dream, at least that part was worth it.

Jennie was suddenly painfully aware of Lisa's hands holding her own.

Lisa seemed to notice at the same time and snatched her hands back.

"Sorry." Lisa apologized again. "I thought it might help."

"That's okay." Jennie said, avoiding Lisa's eyes. "It did help."

"Good." Lisa said, handing Jennie the water again.

Jennie took a sip gratefully. Her throat was extremely dry after that panic attack, or maybe it was because she was stuck in a bunker, locked in an impenetrable room with the last person that wanted her there which was coincidentally the person Jennie always desperately wanted around her. Life was cruel.

"Will you go sit on the couch? I'll try to get us out of here." Lisa suggested gently.

Jennie did as she was told but she knew they weren't getting out of here. If anything she knew of Jisoo, is that she was stubborn and nobody but Park Chaeyoung could ever talk her out of anything and considering Rosie was in on this little game too—Jennie and Lisa were absolutely and utterly at their mercy and stuck down here.

"Don't bother Lis." Jennie said as she sat on the couch with a sigh. "She's not going to let us out."

"You just had an awful panic attack. She has to let you out." Lisa said to Jennie grumpily. She hit the intercom. "Jisoo you asshole! Your baby cousin almost passed out from her panic, open this fucking door!"

Lisa kicked it angrily.

"You calmed her down just fine Limario." Jisoo answered back and Lisa could hear the smirk in her voice.

"Jisoo! I swear to god if you don't let her out right now I'll kick your ass when I get out of here!"

"Definitely not letting you guys out now." Jisoo snickered.

"Motherfucker." Lisa answered angrily.

"You can always guess the code, I'll give you a hint, its six digits."

"I swear you're sadistic." Lisa said frowning.

Jisoo just cackled through the intercom.

"There's extra blankets and pillows in the closet. Everything works. You're all stocked, I even have the internet hooked up down there. There's a laptop you can fight over in the desk drawer for you to do your work. Have a good weekend kiddos!"

"Jisoo!" Lisa shouted over and over again but there was no response. "I'll kill her."

"It's okay Lisa. I overreacted a bit. I'm okay now." Jennie tried to reassure her.

"Are you sure? Do you think you can last through the weekend?" Lisa asked, voice laced in concern as she walked down the stairs defeatedly.

"I have to. Unless I'm actually having some sort of heart attack she's not opening that door."

"She's ridiculous." Lisa said annoyed again.

She watched Jennie yawn and Lisa went to the closet and grabbed them some pillows and blankets. They went up the little stairs and made the bed.

"Um—I can sleep on the sofa." Lisa said as she grabbed a pillow.

"Lisa?"

"Yeah?"

"You don't have to do that. It's a huge bed. If you don't want to sleep in the same space as me I get it but I promise you I'll stay on my side. We can sleep in the same bed."

"Are you sure?" Lisa asked tentatively.

"I don't mind." Jennie shrugged.

They both climbed in awkwardly and created as much space as possible.

"Should I make a pillow wall?" Jennie breathed out.

Lisa couldn't help but snort. "I think we outgrew the pillow wall. I'll just end up cuddling it."

Jennie smiled into the darkness, remembering how they both ended up almost cuddling, their legs entangled as they both cuddled the pillow wall that first night Lisa spent the night with her. They'd come such a long way from the days of hating each other just to end up right back where they started—with this endless space still separating them. Jennie itched to roll over and be held by her.

She turned her back to Lisa instead because she didn't trust herself not to close the gap between them. She looked at her hands through the darkness, they still tingled from Lisa's touch earlier. Lisa's touch that she had been deprived of for a year.

It was almost enough.

"Goodnight baby brat. Sweet dreams." Lisa whispered. She had to at least say that much. Jennie was so close but too far. Her heart ached.

You're sweet, so I'll dream of you. Jennie responded in her head before speaking. Lisa's old goodnight texts immediately coming to mind. She used to stare at them every night while Lisa had been away, pretending Lisa was still sending them.

"Goodnight, idiot."

Jennie's heart leaped when she heard Lisa giggle at her response. She felt Lisa shift on the bed and Jennie tried not to let her heart drop at the knowledge Lisa was turning away from her too.

_________

"How long do you think until they end up cuddling each other, I give them ten minutes tops." Jisoo said as she watched the screen. It was dark now that they turned the lights off but they could still make out their figures under the covers.

"I think you're being generous. Jennie's a cuddle monster, that's why you call her Jendeukie isn't it?" Chaeyoung asked.

"So what, five?"

"Three minutes tops." Chaeyoung claimed confidently.

They watched the screen intently, Jisoo feeding Chaeyoung popcorn before taking a bite of a kernel herself.

________

Jennie passed out quickly, she felt safe now that Lisa was here, knowing she was sleeping in the same bed as her. She felt peaceful despite knowing Lisa didn't feel the same way about her anymore and that Lisa was already over her.

Lisa couldn't sleep. She sighed for the umpteenth time, looking at the ceiling. She felt restless. Confused. She wanted Jennie back but she was hurt she had avoided her the entire time Lisa was away. It was all so contradictory. Jennie acted like she didn't hate her, like she cared but her actions in the last year had been the total opposite.

Ever since Lisa came back though, especially after tonight, Lisa started to believe that maybe what Chaeyoung would tell her over the phone this past year was true—that Jennie was still interested in her well being, that Jennie didn't hate her. She didn't believe it at the time, considering Jennie wouldn't speak to her but now she was doubting it.

She felt Jennie shuffle and Lisa froze when Jennie rolled on top of her. She felt Jennie's fist automatically clutch onto her shirt and Jennie mumbled. "Missed my pillow." Her voice dripping with sleep.

Lisa had slept in Jennie's bed in the past long enough to know by now that Jennie tended to sleep talk. She knew Jennie was asleep right now but Lisa didn't know what to do. If Jennie woke up and realized she was cuddling her she would probably freak out.

Lisa tried to escape but Jennie just whined and clutched her harder.

"Hold me. Idiot." Jennie mumbled again.

Lisa knew there was no getting out of  Jennie's vice like cuddling grip without waking her up. So Lisa did as she was told, she held Jennie. She did what she had wanted to do ever since she had first seen her after so long.

Lisa melted. She couldn't help it, she dropped a kiss to Jennie's head. It wasn't her lips, but it was close enough.

"I love you baby brat." Lisa whispered into the night, into her hair.

"Love. you. too." Jennie answered back. "Idiot."

Lisa did a double take. She had to double check if Jennie might be awake or not after that confession but Jennie was still breathing heavily, she was still asleep. It didn't stop her heart from racing though. Jennie had never said I love you to her before. She had told her she might have gotten to love her before breaking up with Lisa. Jennie had never said it back until now.

Lisa really wanted to wake her up and ask if that was just her sleep adled brain talking or if maybe she really meant it. If she knew it was Lisa she had just said "I love you" to.

Lisa let the sleep take over after that. She could pretend, having Jennie in her arms and hearing her say I love you, she could pretend they were still together and that the nightmare of a year hadn't happened.

__________

"You should have a hotline chipmunk." Jisoo said impressed as she looked at how long it had taken them to cuddle. A whopping two minutes.

"A hotline?" Chaeyoung giggled.

"Yeah, you know for like psychic shit. I swear you never miss."

"I missed Jennie being blackmailed by her dad." Chaeyoung said pouting, "if we had known sooner maybe they wouldn't have suffered so much."

"There's only so much even the great Park Chaeyoung can do." Jisoo said seriously. "Jennie, when she really wants something, especially if that something is for someone she cares about nothing can stop her. We had no chance."

"I guess you're right."

Jisoo got up from the couch.

"Where are you going?"

"To get Jendeukie's books and her laptop, now that they're asleep I can sneak them in there."

"And people call you mean, you're so thoughtful."

"I'm not, I just don't want Jennie to torch my bed if she fails that test." Jisoo said half seriously.

"You're thoughtful Kim Jisoo, admit it."

"Fine, don't tell anybody."

"Of course I won't, I like to keep that secret to myself." Chaeyoung said pecking her on the lips and going to the dining room.

"Here, Lisa left her phone up here too."

They both snuck into the bunker, leaving their stuff at the bottom of the steps before sneaking back up.

"Wait, we should get them clothes too." Jisoo said, "I don't want them stinking up the place."

They split up, Rosie grabbed Lisa some sweats and Jisoo strategically picked out some very short shorts and big shirts for Jennie to wear.

"You're fucked Limario." Jisoo smirked. "Can't wait to watch you drool tomorrow." She snickered to herself. She met Rosie in Lisa's room. "Make sure you only throw in some crop tops and sports bras in there for Lisa."

"Jisoo are you trying to get your baby cousin laid?" Chaeyoung giggled. "In your own bunker?"

"As much as it pains me to say it, yes. Yes I am."

Chaeyoung laughed at the solemn look on Jisoo's face.

"She needs to get laid! I'm tired of seeing her moping around for a whole year and when she wasn't moping she was walking around angry and snapping at everyone. I'm over it."

Chaeyoung shook her head in amusement but did as she was told, only leaving one sweatshirt for Lisa to use but the rest of it were sports bras and cut off shirts, a really low-cut jersey that would expose her stomach from the sides and some crop tops.

"Hope she doesn't freeze to death."

"Don't worry, it's heated down there." Jisoo got an idea as soon as she said that. "Come to think of it..." she trailed off.

"Jisoo what are you scheming now?" Chaeyoung said, noticing the evil glint in her eyes. "We already locked them up down there."

"If they don't bang by tomorrow I'm cranking up the heat." Jisoo said mischievously. "Then they'll wear less clothes and jump each other's bones."

"I think they should talk first don't you?" Chaeyoung said as they walked back to the bunker.

"If they don't talk by tomorrow I'm cranking up the heat." Jisoo said adamantly. "Anyway that's how they work isn't it? They do everything backwards. Hate each other, fake date, bang, real date?"

____________

Jennie woke up feeling so good it was ridiculous. There was a warm body under her that smelled really really good so she just had to voice it.

"Smell so good." Jennie said in a thick sleep voice. Come to think of it, she really liked the warmth. She liked it so much she decided to climb directly on top of it, burrowing her face in a slender neck. "Mmm. Warm pillow."

She felt herself drift back off to sleep.

Lisa had stirred when Jennie spoke, feeling her climb on her and Lisa couldn't help but smirk.

"You only love me because I'm your favorite pillow don't you?" Lisa asked in amusement.

"Mhmm." Was the sleepy reply.

Lisa wrapped her arms around Jennie, tracing her back slowly.

"I missed you baby brat."

Jennie had apparently completely fallen asleep now because she didn't respond.

Lisa fell back to sleep shortly after, too comfortable with her Jennie blanket to be able to keep her eyes open.

Jennie stirred again and this time she woke up fully, realizing she was probably suffocating Lisa with her body weight.

"Shit. Jennie you were supposed to stay on your side of the bed." She whispered to herself, scolding herself. She should have known though. She should have guessed she would cling to Lisa in her sleep as soon as she got the chance.

Jennie tried to get off of Lisa but Lisa's arms just tightened around her more and Jennie couldn't escape.

Not that she wanted to, but Lisa would probably freak out if she woke up cuddling her. Jennie gave up quickly though. She brought her hand up to rest in the middle of Lisa's chest and rested her chin there.

She couldn't escape so she wasn't going to waste an opportunity to look at Lisa. Sleeping Lisa looked so young and carefree. She traced her eyes over Lisa's face, taking in her plump lips and her perfect jawline and her pretty eyes with those full lashes. Even though they were closed, they were still so pretty. Jennie wanted to kiss her eyelids in appreciation. If she could have reached up and done it without waking Lisa she would have.

"I'm sorry I hurt you." Jennie whispered. "I love you so much and it breaks my heart that you think I don't."

Jennie used her free hand to trace Lisa's collarbone.

"I made a choice that hurt the both of us and I almost regretted it when I heard you yell at Rosie, but then you talked about your trip and you looked so radiant Lisa. So happy. Just talking about living out your dream, I don't think I've seen you smile so hard so I don't regret it because it was worth it. Even if you hate me for the rest of your life. I made a choice and I'm standing by it."

Jennie felt a tear fall, she swallowed the frog in her throat. She watched her finger as she traced Lisa's collarbone and silently cried.

She didn't see doe eyes were staring back at her now, watching her.

Lisa stayed quiet. She knew Jennie hadn't noticed she had woken up. She watched Jennie cry silently and trace her skin.

Jennie eventually wiped her tears and looked up, she jumped when she noticed Lisa was watching her.

She squeaked in surprise and sat up, effectively straddling Lisa and Jennie squeaked again and jumped off to her side of the bed.

"I—I'm sorry Lisa. I—I swear I didn't notice, I did it in my sleep." Jennie stuttered, avoiding eye contact. "I didn't mean to go to your side of the bed."

Lisa ignored what she said, sitting up on the bed and staring and Jennie intently.

"What choice did you make Jennie?" Lisa asked. She had woken up and caught the very end of her little speech. I made a choice that hurt the both of us and I almost regretted it...I don't think I've seen you smile so hard so I don't regret it because it was worth it. Even if you hate me for the rest of your life. I made a choice and I'm standing by it.

The speech had most definitely confused Lisa.

Jennie's heart dropped.

"The choice to break up with you." Jennie lied, trying to get up from the bed so Lisa wouldn't question her. Lisa gently grabbed her wrist to stop her.

"Jennie? Please. Can we talk?"

"There's not much to talk about Lis." Jennie said nervously.

"Please Jennie. I just need closure." Lisa begged. "If we're going to live with each other I need at least that. I just need to know why, I need help understanding this past year. Can you give me that?"

Jennie's heart broke at that word. Closure. Jennie needed Lisa. Lisa needed closure.

"Baby brat?"

That broke her. That stupid nickname she loved so much, coming from Lisa broke her.

The least she could do was help Lisa find her closure. The least she could do is give her as much of the truth as possible. Jennie sat back down on the bed. She was still avoiding looking directly at Lisa because she was sure to start crying again.

"Why didn't you ever call me?" Lisa asked, and Jennie could hear the hurt in her voice and Jennie felt the tears she was holding back fall at the sound of it.

"Not even once. I get you not wanting to talk to me in the beginning since you had broken up with me but—I don't know. I thought maybe after a few months at least. Just one time. Just once in 365 days so we could tell each other about how we were doing. Check in. I know I might have had stronger feelings for you—and I told you I lov—"" Lisa swallowed hard. That memory still hurt, it still haunted her nightmares. "—that I love you and you didn't feel the same way but we had something at some point. Right? I thought you would still care in some way, even if it wasn't the same as before and we were just friends? So why didn't you ever call? Why didn't you answer the phone when I called you?"

Jennie ducked her head to hide her tears. If only Lisa knew how strong her feelings really were. How much Jennie had been in love with her too. Is still so in love with her.

"I couldn't." Jennie answered honestly.

"Why?"

"Because I would have changed my mind." Jennie tried saying, voice thick with pain from the fact she had been forced to not only let her go away, but let her go completely.

She knew long distance with Lisa would have been hard, but Jennie would have beared through it just to have Lisa in some way. It would have been way easier than what she had to go through the past year, having to avoid her altogether. Long distance would have been hard, but worth it, but of course her father had ruined that chance like he ruined every other thing in Jennie's life.

"You would have changed your mind about what?" Lisa pressed, still trying to understand.

"Breaking up with you."

"So we could have gotten back together?" Lisa asked hopefully. "If we had talked?"

"No Lisa!" Jennie said frustratedly. Wiping her tears away angrily. "We couldn't have! We shouldn't have. It wouldn't have worked. It would have messed me up." Jennie said truthfully.

She knew she would have never forgiven herself if she had stood in the way of Lisa's dream. If Lisa had stayed. Either Lisa would eventually resent her for it and if that didn't happen Jennie would have absolutely sabotaged their relationship out of guilt for ruining Lisa's chances at that fellowship just because she couldn't stay away from her. Jennie had made a choice that broke both their hearts but it had been for the best. It was the only choice.

"Jennie, I didn't cheat on you. I swear." Lisa promised again, thinking Jennie couldn't stay with her, couldn't call her because she couldn't stay with a cheater. Jennie deserved better than that. Especially after Kai and Lisa hated the thought that Jennie thought she might have cheated on her too. "I could never cheat on you."

"I saw her try to kiss you. I saw the both of you." Jennie said adamantly, clinging to the only real reason she could use to make Lisa believe there was any sense in the way Jennie had behaved after they had finally figured it out, finally getting together officially and being happy.

"She did try Jennie. I won't deny that. You're not wrong. She did try to kiss me but I moved away. Maybe the angle from where you were standing made it look different. I don't know but I swear all I got was a cheek kiss and then she apologized to me for even trying. She knew I wouldn't have let her."

"I'm still going to kill her. If I ever see her again she better run the other way." Jennie said angrily. "How dare she try to kiss you when you were taken by me?! Stupid airhead. You don't belong to her anymore."

"Wait—so you believe me now?" Lisa asked hopefully. "You believe we didn't kiss?"

Jennie cursed herself for being so jealous she let that slip out.

"No. You're a cheater and I had to break up with you because you were traveling the world and probably found a girl in every city." Jennie said, crossing her arms angrily. "I bet you have several more notches on your bed post by now! Twelve months away, I'm sure they all threw themselves at you and you let them."

Jennie hated how Lisa could just make the jealousy rise out of her. One second she was crying because she had broken Lisa's heart and now she was thinking about all the women that Lisa probably made out with or did more with on her trip and she was suddenly, irrationally, angry. Lisa wasn't hers anymore so why wouldn't have Lisa indulged, she'd been gone for a year. Jennie got up from the bed in a huff.

Lisa recognized this Jennie. Jealous Jennie. She'd seen it first at that breakfast place after visiting Taehyung's shop for the first time. She saw it anytime Suzy was around or when Lisa had ever even mentioned her around Jennie.

Lisa grabbed her wrist again and pulled her back gently but with enough force that Jennie lost her balance and fell on the bed with yet another cute little squeal.

Jennie bounced on the bed, fully prepared to escape but she faltered as Lisa hovered above her, she was practically on top of her and the nerves hit Jennie at once.

"Are you jealous baby brat?"

"No." Jennie glared at Lisa. "Why would I be jealous of my ex-girlfriend getting it on with pretty foreign girls?You can do whatever you want." Jennie bit back.

Lisa smirked. She was about to play a very dangerous game but she needed to know. She might get slapped over it but it would so be worth it if it meant she could still make Jennie jealous. It gave her hope that there might still be something, anything there.

"There were very pretty girls actually. Especially the Salvadorians, they're really good dancers too." Lisa admitted casually.

Lisa watched as Jennie went from avoiding her gaze to flicking her eyes up and glaring daggers straight at Lisa and Lisa felt the bomb start ticking.

"There was this one girl, Alejandra, she was a phenomenal dancer. We danced almost every night." Lisa bragged. Alejandra was a little seven year old girl she used to teach how to dance when she was in El Salvador.

"She was really cute. Cutest girl I've ever seen." Lisa admitted. She really was cute, just not in the same way as Jennie was of course. Alejandra was a cute little girl that Lisa saw as a little sibling whereas Jennie can be cute and then turn into this sexy as hell woman that Lisa constantly craved to be close to.

Lisa noticed the bomb was about to explode after that comment. Jennie grabbed her roughly by the collar after that.

"If you don't stop talking right now you're getting that big slap to the face I always promised to give you for your birthday." Jennie threatened.

"You don't want to hear about our first kiss?" Lisa asked innocently, planning on telling her about how little Alejandra gave her a kiss on the cheek after they met for the first time and taught Lisa their customs on how they greeted strangers.

Lisa finally got that big slap to the face from Jennie.

Jennie shoved her off roughly afterwards. Lisa landed on her back and Jennie shoved her down on the bed with her hand, glaring at her and practically shouting.

"I do NOT. Want to hear about your other fucking girls Lisa!"

Jennie climbed off the bed and started stomping down the steps. Lisa could hear her grumble all the way.

"Stupid womanizer!"

"You probably didn't even wait a fucking week after we broke up before shacking up with her did you?!"

"How many girls did you kiss Lisa?! A new one every day?! I wouldn't put it past you!"

She heard Jennie turn around once she got to the bottom of the steps and start climbing back up, huffing the entire time.

Lisa was sitting up on the bed already, smirking. Jennie glared at her again.

"I fucked a lot of girls too! And guys!" Jennie yelled. "And they were all better in bed than you!" Jennie lied, too overcome with jealousy to process anything at the moment.

Lisa couldn't help but grin as she watched her angry kitten start stomping down the stairs again, making sure Lisa knew how annoyed she was the whole way by throwing her little fit.

Lisa laid back on the bed and squealed in excitement.

___________

Jisoo was glued to the t.v as she watched.

Chaeyoung sprinted back into the living room holding all the snacks and food she had been making.

"Oh gosh, what happened? What did I miss." Chaeyoung asked as she sat down on the couch next to Jisoo.

"Jealous Jennie." Jisoo said, reaching out to grab a bag of chips and opened them up.

"Uh oh. Jelly Nini?" Chaeyoung said, eyes wide.

"Yeah, I might have to open that door sooner and extract Limario before Jennie murders her."

"Why did she get jealous?" Chaeyoung asked as she munched on her snacks, already invested.

"Because the idiot told her she kissed some girl named Alejandra!" Jisoo answered.

Chaeyoung started laughing. "Oh lord, Lisa's doing it on purpose!"

"What do you mean?"

"Alejandra is that little seven year old she was teaching how to dance remember?"

"Oh shit. You're right. Why is she trying to make her jealous though? Jealous Jennie is scary. She already slapped Limario and I know we don't have sound but damn, she swung back so hard I almost heard it from here."

"I'm pretty sure Lisa just wants to know if Jennie still likes her."

"By getting slapped and almost murdered? I think the easier way would be to just fucking ask Jennie straight up."

"Lisa's not really a rational human being though is she?" Chaeyoung giggled.

Jisoo had to agree. "Crackhead."

"You're a crackhead too." Chaeyoung pointed out.

"Yeah I guess I am but I would never make you jealous on purpose like that idiot is doing with Jennie. I value my life."

"I wouldn't hurt you." Chaeyoung pouted.

"No, but you would murder whoever I used to make you jealous with and get away with it and then slowly kill me out of sadness with those sad disappointed looks you would give me that break my heart."

Chaeyoung beamed. "You know me so well."

_________________

Lisa finally got out of bed and found Jennie already cooking breakfast downstairs once she stopped feeling so giddy at the fact she had managed to make Jennie jealous. She tried to boil some water for ramen, so she could help.

"Don't you dare touch that stove. Sit down idiot." Jennie scolded Lisa immediately.

"I'm hungry."

"Which is why I'm cooking. Now sit, you stupid player."

Lisa grinned at seeing angry Jennie again. God she really wanted to kiss that frown away. It was irresistible.

Jennie set down a plate with a rolled omelette in front of Lisa so harshly that the plate almost cracked. Jennie then proceeded to cut it into strips for her angrily. Lisa flinched at the sound of the knife scraping against the plate.

"It's not what you think Jennie." Lisa said, ready to explain now that her experiment had been successful.

"I'm holding a fucking knife Lisa." Jennie threatened her, making it scrape on the plate in a screech as she huffed as proof.

"She's—" Lisa tried to continue.

"Knife!" Jennie said, pointing it at Lisa angrily.

Lisa promptly shut up.

Jennie sat down across from her and Lisa tried really hard not to giggle at Jennie angrily eating.

"She's seven. Alejandra is seven." Lisa said once Jennie had finished cutting her own rolled omelette into sections and had finally put the knife down. She watched Jennie pause for a second, midway into taking a bite and then continue to ignore Lisa.

"Our first kiss was when she taught me that in El Salvador you kiss people on the cheek when you greet them." Lisa said, her voice laced with amusement.

"I don't care." Jennie said with a bite. She was still angry. So what if Alejandra was seven, that didn't mean there hadn't been other age appropriate girls that Lisa probably made out with. Jennie stabbed her egg roll with her fork harshly.

"So you slept with people while I was away?" Lisa asked Jennie.

"Yes. Lots of people. I had lots and lots of sex." Jennie said grumpily.

"So does that mean you moved on?" Lisa prodded again. She watched Jennie freeze for a second and Lisa couldn't help but smile again.

"Yep." Jennie lied. "I don't like cheaters so I moved on and found someone else the first week we broke up."

"That's a shame. I haven't even kissed anybody since you." Lisa admitted.

Jennie froze again and the shook her head.

"Whatever. Liar."

"I'm serious. How could I? I told you when we got together that you couldn't leave me because I wouldn't be able to date anyone else." Lisa reminded her.

Jennie abruptly got up from her seat, having finished breakfast.

"Are you done?" Jennie asked, but didn't wait for Lisa to answer, grabbing her empty plate and taking it to the sink to wash.

"Were you jealous Jennie?"

"No."

"Why are you lying?"

"Because." Jennie answered and then cursed herself for the slip. She could feel Lisa slide in next to her, helping her rinse the dishes.

"Why were you jealous?"

"Because I thought you moved on too fast okay!" Jennie shouted, handing her the last plate angrily. "Why wouldn't I be jealous that my ex-girlfriend who had told me she loved me kissed someone else not even two months in to us breaking up!"

Jennie huffed and left Lisa rinsing and drying the dishes, walking to the living room.

She noticed her books and some clothes were laid out neatly on the foot of the stairs. Jennie yelled into the room.

"You can bring me my stuff but not let me out of here! I hate you Kim Jisoo!"

Jennie grabbed her stuff and put the clothes up in the closet before going to the couch, laying out her books. She really needed something to do to ignore the fact Lisa was there. She needed to study anyway. She had a major test coming up.

Lisa sidled into the room. She sat next to Jennie.

"Baby brat. Why didn't you call me?"

"I told you already." Jennie said, not looking up from her books.

"What's the real reason? You promised we would be friends if we ever broke up though. You always keep your promises."

"We're friends now." Jennie countered.

"Did you not care what was going on in my life?" Lisa questioned.

Jennie set her highlighter down and sighed.

"Rosie made sure I got updates. I knew you were safe."

"What about me though, what if I wanted to know what was going on with you?" Lisa continued.

"Rosie gave you updates too." Jennie pointed out.

"I missed you though. I missed your voice. It wasn't the same."

"I missed your voice too." Jennie admitted. She had missed it too fucking much. So much she had almost ruined the fellowship for Lisa. Especially at night when she felt the devastating loneliness and the cold from Lisa's side of the bed that she almost bought a burner phone and some voice changer just so she could call her and talk to her.

"I don't get it then Jennie. Why did you ghost me? I'm confused. You've been a walking contradiction ever since I got back. I thought I would come back to you kicking me out or slapping me for cheating on you and telling me to never come near you ever again but you're acting the opposite."

"I'm sorry." Jennie said in a soft voice. What else could she even say? I still love you? I did all of this for you? I can't yell at you because you did nothing wrong? I can't kick you out because all I ever wanted was for you to come back and be here?

"You know I didn't cheat right?" Lisa asked again. "Right? You know I could never be a cheater and especially not with you. Right?"

Jennie felt the tears again. "Yes Lisa. I know."

Lisa felt like a huge weight had been lifted.

"Then why didn't you call me? Why did we even break up in the first place if you know that?"

"Because I had to. I would have regretted it if I hadn't."

"I was loyal Jennie. Even though we weren't together. I didn't look at anyone else, just like I promised you when we decided to do the long distance thing and I know you didn't either. We could have made it work."

"No Lis. We wouldn't have. It was too hard."

"This was hard. Not speaking to you for a year was hard. Not knowing if you were okay was hard."

Jennie finally looked at Lisa. She couldn't help but bring a hand up to caress her cheek and Lisa leaned in to the touch.

"I'm sorry for hurting you Lisa. I'm sorry I broke up with you when it was the last thing I wanted to do but I had to."

"Why?"

"I told you Lisa. If I hadn't I would have regretted it. You were going to follow your dream and I had to stay and follow mine." Jennie got up slowly, feeling emotionally drained. "I—can we finish talking later? I need to take a shower."

Lisa nodded slowly. She could tell Jennie needed space and Lisa was just glad they had talked. She had gotten something. Some answers.

Jennie left the room as quick as possible. She needed to cry it out again. She ran the water and spent too long in there, sobbing.

Lisa could hear Jennie crying and she couldn't help but cry too. She didn't understand it. Everything in her told her Jennie still had feelings for her. That Jennie didn't want to break up and had wanted to talk to her while she had been away too.

Nothing made sense.

Lisa gave her space. She went to go shower too once Jennie was done so Jennie could have some time to herself after their heavy conversation.

They both worked silently for the rest of the afternoon. Jennie studied while Lisa took residence on the adjacent couch and used Jisoo's laptop to edit some photos.

Lisa smirked when she bought the software she needed and downloaded it on Jisoo's laptop with the credit card that was saved on there. Serves her right for locking them up down there.

A couple hundred dollars was nothing to Jisoo anyway.

_________