Chapter 426 - 426 WAS IT SUPPOSED TO BE THIS PAINFUL?
The Number One Star in the Interstellar Era
426 WAS IT SUPPOSED TO BE THIS PAINFUL?
SNOW froze on the spot when he heard Ashâs question. He wanted to quickly answer that thatâs not the case, that was far from it. But the moment he tried to speak, his throat closed up and he couldnât even mutter a single thing. His expression completely closed off as well. Even if he couldnât see himself right now, he knew that he must be frowning.
This wasnât what he wanted. But from the moment Ash suddenly appeared at the cafe earlier, he couldnât properly express his emotions. He wanted to smile at the other but itâs like his face muscles cramped up every time he did. He couldnât even talk to Ash without sounding like an arrogant prick.
He was on the verge of seriously banging his head to whatever hard object near him just so he could get a grip. But, of course, he couldnât do that. Well, itâs not like anyone could blame him in this situation. Itâs because Snow was so surprised by Ashâs sudden appearance that he couldnât react properly.
He knew about the connection between Ash and Reas because of Astrid. It came as a huge shock to him when he found out about it. He couldnât believe that the universe could actually be this small. He felt like asking fate, âof all the person Ash could be roommates with, why does it have to be the brother of my friend?â.
Snow didnât think that he would see the other again this soon. It felt so surreal that he had been pinching his arm since earlier just to make sure that he wasnât dreaming. But this was indeed reality. And right now, Ash was having a misunderstanding about him.
âFine. I wonât bother you again,â the other added after not hearing his response. âJust⦠donât make it so obvious that you donât like me. I donât want to worry my friend or his brother. Then.â
Ash made a slight nod before turning around and running towards where Reas was. Snow could hear the otherâs bright voice as he asked Reas to play with him. But he knew Ash well enough to know that he was a bit hurt because of his âdisregardâ.
Snow bit his lower lip. He so wanted to turn around and tell the other that it was all a misunderstanding. But he couldnât. It felt like his feet were chained to the floor and he couldnât move at all.
He truly felt like crying at that moment.
â¦..
He had already hurt Ash by suddenly disappearing, not telling him how they could meet again. And now, as a stranger, he hurt him again.
He could feel his eyes watering. He had to take a deep breath and close his eyes just so he wouldnât really cry. He was inwardly convincing himself that this was for the better.
Because if they get along right off the bat, Ash would surely recognize him. Itâs almost like telling him directly that he was his âSnowâ. And that would contradict the deal he made with his father.
Yes, a deal.
A year ago, when his father told him that he could now finally regain his real identity, the first thing he thought of was that he could now reveal his real face and voice to Ash. He had always felt guilty that he had to use a disguise when meeting the other. Itâs like, the one who became friends with Ash was not really him but another person.
Snow didnât mind it at first. Because he knew that hiding his real identity was important for his safety. And it was the only way his father could spend time with him openly. But as he grew older and he slowly realized how important those three months he spent in Alluna every year, the urge to show his real face to Ash also became stronger.
His father must have noticed that his feelings for Ash was no longer that of a mere friend. And that just like him, Ash also felt the same way. Thatâs why his father proposed that deal.
At first, the other showed that he was not in favor of any romantic relationship that might form between him and Ash. Saying things like how Ash didnât have the ability to protect him. Or how their social status was too different from each other. And the most classic one, that he was still too young to know what he really felt.
The two of them quarrelled for the first time that day. Snow probably said some things out of anger that he really didnât mean. Like how could his father care about status when thatâs the reason why he couldnât be with his other father and now he was stuck with some vile woman and their children.
When he saw the pain that crossed his fatherâs face after he said that, he knew that he had crossed the line. He apologized, of course. But because of feeling guilty, he could no longer directly argue with him regarding Ashâs matter.
His father might have how depressed he was at that time so he proposed that deal to him. His father said that if Ash recognized him without him telling the other who he was, then he would not interfere if the two of them ever wanted to be in a relationship with each other in the future.
The most important condition for that was Snow not directly approaching Ash in any way. The other should recognize him purely by his own accord and without any hint from Snow. If not, then everything would be invalid.
It might sound unfair. But Snow thought that it was doable. And maybe, in his subconscious, he also wanted to know if Ash could really recognize him without the disguise and the voice changer. If the other could recognize him as his summer snow.
That first meeting when they passed by each other on the elevator was more than disappointing. But this one today was even more so. Honestly, he didnât know if he could continue to experience more of this.
Really, was it supposed to be this painful?