nine

second chance...

day 10 + 11

***

"I take it...you don't forgive me."

"No."

Jeremiah looked at Ivan like he was a fool, watching Ivan's stare become nervous.

"You didn't think that me having sex with you and saying all I said...was because I forgave you, right? There's no way-."

"No, forget I even said anything. It was dumb of me to ask that." Ivan wished he could take those words back, but it was too late now.

Jeremiah had his eyes narrowed upon him as he now questioned things more. His instinct was satiated...for now. Because of that, he was able to use his reason more.

"What is your motive? What do you even want from me that you'd suddenly switch up and suddenly want forgiveness? I don't understand you. This is too abrupt." Jeremiah shook his head despite Ivan nodding insistently.

"I know it's abrupt, but I have no ulterior motives. I just want...you back. I miss you, I do love you. It took me losing my-." Ivan lost his voice, his hand going to his throat as the Luna kept him from speaking.

He instantly realized he couldn't even be honest about that either.

"Took you losing what?"

"Took losing my...ability to touch you, kiss you, look at you, speak to you whenever I want. To wake up and know that the first thing on both of our minds, are each other. Being close and you coming to me despite it all, despite how...horrible I was." Ivan tells him honestly.

Except he was in the wrong reality. The only time they had ever kissed, touched, or done such things was when they were in that gym closet. Unless he counted the times of when they were kids.

"You speak of...those times when we both were innocent and unaware of what we'd be?"

Ivan frowned, but immediately began to realize that this was different.

"Yeah...those times." Ivan began to grin at those memories instead. Because the memories he made before...weren't even a thing anymore.

Was it now like some kind of fever dream? Since it was all changed just for his 'second chance'? Or did he die there and life continued without him...while he's here, in his 'second chance' reality?

"Or maybe not...I don't know." He found himself becoming sad about what he lost, smiling solemnly. "I just ruined everything for myself. I lost everything, yet didn't lose a thing."

Jeremiah was confused by his way of wording things as he had no idea the person he was before. Experiencing another life...while time reverted, unaware of what he had done.

How the way he was before was no comparison to the treatment that Ivan put them all through at the time.

"I guess you're right, huh?" Jeremiah chuckled, standing up as he held onto Ivan. Adjusting his joggers so that they wouldn't slip off, him heading towards the stairs. Walking up them while still inside, knotted too. "Despite how horrible you were, nothing really changed for you. You still are getting your way."

"But I'm not."

"You are though, don't lie to yourself." Jeremiah snorts at Ivan's denial.

"I'm not lying... I'm not getting my way whatsoever. If I was I wouldn't fucking be here." Ivan found himself getting angry, but he looked away instantly.

His hands covering his face, Jeremiah stood in the hallway even more perplexed. He saw the way Ivan seemed to be breaking down, then built back up somehow.

"Here with me...in this hall?"

"Sure, yeah." Ivan groaned, sick of this already. "Think what you want."

"Why would I do that?"

"Isn't that what you all do anyway? Think what you want, think what you will - I don't care. It's because of me that you all think the shit you do." Ivan looked at Jeremiah as he looked shocked to hear him say this. "So...keep doing it."

"So you don't plan to change."

"I do!" Ivan snapped, becoming even more upset. "But I know that even in my change, people will still think the same thing. Even you. You just asking me that question tells me enough about how you see my desire to change." Ivan raised his eyebrow to wait if he could deny what he was saying. "You don't believe in me...and that's fine. I deserve this."

Jeremiah didn't bother arguing with that. Because he didn't truly believe in him. For all he knew, this would only last for a week or two.

He wasn't sure of anything he did.

"I'm not sure what to say to you right now. I'm still confused myself...as to why you suddenly care," Jeremiah walked them into Ivan's bedroom.

Laying him down on the bed, he felt that his knot had faded. He pulled himself out and could see that the majority of his cum was still inside. Looking at Ivan, he saw him avoiding to look at him now.

"But I'm not mad at this change. It's like what you said, even despite your change...I will still think my reasons as to why I think you're suddenly changing. It's not a bad thing, I kinda think it'd be weird if I didn't question your motives." Jeremiah smiled down at him. "I don't want to hurt your feelings. If you say you're changing for the better, who am I to deny that? At the same time...I will still question it. I think that's fair."

"I don't want to talk about it anymore."

Ivan began to roll himself over, sitting up as he wanted to get away. Not necessarily get away from Jeremiah, but get away from this predicament.

It felt pointless even trying, but he wanted to try so bad.

"Why?"

Jeremiah wrapped his arm around Ivan's waist, pulling him back against him. Setting his chin on his shoulder, he smiled at Ivan's red ears.

"Do you mind if I hold you like this?"

"You're already doing it, so why bother asking?" Ivan questions him quietly.

Only for Jeremiah to let go of him, Ivan watching as he just sat on the foot of the bed.

"I'll ask again, without...having done anything. Would you mind if I held you like that?"

Ivan's lips tightened together, looking away as he tried not to cry. He couldn't get over how kind he was to him. Because he didn't think he deserved it, but at the same time, it made him miss when he didn't have the concern.

The concern of eighty days left.

"No...I wouldn't have."

Jeremiah was quick to bring him back against him, Ivan feeling him snuggle against his body.

They both just sat there, Jeremiah hugging him as if he did forgive him. Except Ivan knew better than to be fooled by this.

Not that Jeremiah was trying to fool him to begin with.

"How...has it been?"

"In what way?"

"How was your pregnancy?"

Ivan really didn't know how to answer this now. Because when he was pregnant before, Jeremiah was very much involved.

Spoiling him, nurturing him, taking care of him. He had no complications despite doctors saying there may be some. The only reason why he didn't have any...was because of how tentative Jeremiah was.

"What...did you hear?"

"I heard...that it was difficult. That you were in pain, a lot of pain. I know how you can be, so I bet you handled it well. I just wish...you let me help you," Jeremiah nestled his head into Ivan's neck, "I would've been...the perfect 'Alpha' for you...Omega too."

"I know." Ivan smiles, remembering the memories of him being just as such.

He was so perfect that when Luka was born, he seemed more comfortable in the presence of Jeremiah's uncontrolled pheromones than his own. That envy that came from Luka preferring Jeremiah though was obvious.

Now, there was no immediate attachment like there was before.

"I hope you continue to let me see him."

"I will, don't worry. This isn't a one off thing. I...I want you to be able to come here and see Luka whenever you please. That's what...I want." Ivan looked back at Jeremiah as their eyes locked on.

The longer they looked at one another, there was that urge again. Urge for Jeremiah to pin Ivan down and hear his cries loud and clear.

Leaning towards Ivan, he turned him completely in his arms to face him. The both of them close to each other and wanting to touch the other.

Only for Jeremiah to kiss down Ivan's neck, sticking his tongue out to taste him. He let it trail up Ivan's neck completely, feeling Ivan's hands grip his shoulders.

Just to feel Jeremiah's hand grip his neck, taking him aback.

"I let Tate fill in the place that you once filled. In a desperate attempt to hold onto that kind of dynamic, someone wanting to control me like you did," Jeremiah leaned Ivan onto his back, looking down at him, "He tried to, and he's not bad at it. It's not hard to demand someone to do something. Except it wasn't the same...and I feel bad that he went into this - despite the warnings - thinking he had a chance."

Jeremiah removed his hand from around Ivan's neck, sitting back as he began to remember all of what Tate said. All of what he had been through with Ivan.

He didn't want...to be seen as 'easy'. Because it wasn't easy getting himself to the place where he could even move. When Ivan said what he said and did what he did, he felt like dying.

Just being away from Ivan and knowing that he'd do anything in his power to keep him away, almost killed him. Tate saved his life...and yet?

He was here.

"Jeremiah?" Ivan said his name quietly.

The look on his face was like he was beginning to remember why he was mad in the first place. He was afraid of that because he didn't want him to be angry anymore.

When he sat up, he grabbed Jeremiah's hand. He watched the way he looked back at him and his nerves heightened.

"He was right...I am stupid."

"Tate called you stupid?" Ivan became annoyed. "Why is he saying that? Interesting coming from him-."

"Just quit it." Jeremiah yanked his hand from his, Ivan looking up at him sadly. "Tate is right. I'm pathetic and stupid for letting my instinct dictate my actions. Why am I here...with you? Am I some kind of freak? How could I sleep with you despite all the shit you've done to me?"

"Sleeping with someone and forgiving someone are two different things. I knew you being here wasn't because you just forgave me, I already know. I still want to earn your forgiveness-."

"Do you even know how to do that?" Jeremiah questioned him sharply.

Before he could say anything, the both of them heard footsteps rushing up the stairs. Jeremiah's head whipping onto the door as it became nostalgic.

Like the time they were in the gym closet, now they were in Ivan's room. The both of them making eye contact with Ivan's father.

He just stood there, seeing the predicament they both were in. His eyes moving onto Ivan who just stared at him blankly. The anger and frustration that was pent up towards his only son reached a breaking point now.

Rushing into the room, he grabbed Ivan by the arm harshly as he yanked him off the bed. Ivan looking at him in shock to him slamming him onto the floor, his eyes narrowing upon him.

Now he felt that inferiority complex from looking up at them on the floor. The disgust in his father's eyes, an Alpha. Then the look in Jeremiah's eyes that he couldn't read, but he felt that part of him become angry.

"I let you embarrass me once, and you were so close to ruining my prospects as the new leader because of your difficulties. Yet now, here you are with the person who you humiliated and wished nothing but the worst upon. You two were set to marry because he was the first to be with you in your Heat, and I let you two cancel it despite how it would look on me. Yet here you two are..." His father snaps.

Ivan looked over at Jeremiah, seeing him close his eyes as he looked away. He didn't expect that at all as his eyes set back onto his father.

"You're angry at me, I can tell-."

"I'm beyond angry! You constantly make a mockery of everyone who loves and cares for you! You make yourself the problem, as if you being an Omega was ever going to be a problem. Because of your difficulties and issues, you've made yourself a problem. No one cares that you're an Omega, just you." His father sneers in ridicule as Ivan got more and more angry in this predicament.

Looking away from him, his father set his sights on Jeremiah who was avoiding his gaze. He went towards him and rested his hand on his shoulder.

Jeremiah looked up at him, but looked away timidly as he was full of nerves.

"Did he pressure you into-?"

"I'm sorry for interrupting, sir; but I wasn't made to do anything with him. My instinct drove me here...and I don't regret that." Jeremiah looked at him for a moment, just for his eyes to migrate onto Ivan. Except when he looked back at his father, there was that look in his eyes. "Wait...why are you here? You still have work."

Ivan's father already knew that him mentioning this would probably cause an issue. Except he hoped in him saying this...it would certify some things.

Make things more clear for them both, but mainly Ivan. Because he was tired of seeing his son ruin not just Jeremiah, but himself.

"Did you have sex with Tate when he had his Heat once?"

Jeremiah's eyes widen, but the first person to react the most was Ivan. He pulled himself up as he tried to stand, only for his legs to collapse from weakness.

"I...I don't know, b-but..."

"It doesn't matter now." Ivan breathes, but neither of them looked at him. "Look at me!"

"It does matter. Tate informed me of your choices and what you would be doing here. You two have had sex, it's very obvious so don't bother denying it. Except you, Jeremiah, canceled the wedding for both of your sakes. Except now, you've gotten yourself in another predicament with another Omega. You know the rules," Ivan's father began to grin, resting his hand upon Jeremiah's shoulder, "what do you think I will say?"

Jeremiah didn't care what he was going to say.

He was angry that Tate would do such a thing because he was unaware himself that he had sex with him on his Heat once. If he had known he would've never had sex with him to begin with because of the rules.

"If...I ever did, I had no idea."

"How can you have no idea on what an Omega in Heat smells like?" Ivan's father questioned him as if he was stupid. "It is very obvious. It incapacitates most and it makes an Alpha lose their sense of reason, all of their senses go out the window. The only thing they want to do is be with that Omega and breed...all because of their scent alone. That's where the test comes in, to not fall for that."

That's when Jeremiah's eyes lowered onto Ivan, seeing the predicament he was in. He grabbed a blanket from the bed as he went over to him. Covering his body with it, he turned to stand back up.

"I only know about Ivan's smell. I just assumed all Heat's smelled like his and haven't been affected by one since." Jeremiah tells him honestly despite the surprise written all over his face. "So, what? Are you going to tell me I have to marry him now?"

"No, please don't!" Ivan cried desperately to both of their surprise. "You can't m-marry him! It's...it's-."

"It's what?" His father interrupts.

Ivan began to feel sick, seeing the way they both looked down at him. Except this felt much worse than it ever had before.

Jeremiah could tell that Ivan was beginning to feel his inferiority complex. His eyes glancing over at his father who glared down at him. That's when he lowered himself to Ivan's level.

His hand settled near Ivan's balled up hands, looking at him.

"How does that make you feel?" Jeremiah asks softly as Ivan's face began to turn red. "If I marry Tate? I'm between a rock and a hard place. You haven't said...anything."

"I would be angry and sad. You can't...you can't marry him."

"Why?"

"Because I said so."

"That's it?" Jeremiah asks him with no emotion in his voice.

Ivan could tell he was messing up again. Except he didn't want to say what he wanted to say in front of his father. He also...didn't even know what to say in the first place.

"I...I..." Ivan's eyes wavered onto his father who still was looking down at him.

The way he looked at him stunted him all over again. His eyes wandering again as his breathing intensified. His frustrations rising as he began to feel his face become warm.

Jeremiah noticed it all too well.

That same expression, the frustrations, and the inferiority. He didn't want to deal with that again, with this.

"You still...have issues of your own that you need to face. You shouldn't worry about my predicament since you can barely help yourself," Jeremiah tells him quietly as Ivan didn't understand where he was leading with that, "I don't want to be...the person you want me to be. The pathetic and timid Alpha, who still is stuck in that Omega mindset. I am still...stuck in trying to understand myself, and when I'm with you, I revert back to my old self. The part of me that lets you screw me over. I love you enough to not let you get too close to me again, because I know if I do and I become that pathetic person once again...

"I won't just hate myself, but I will hate you too."

Ivan's eyes began to water as he saw Jeremiah look away, turning back to look at his father.

"If I have to marry Tate...I-."

"Marry me!" Ivan screamed out.

He felt his heart racing and began to feel sicker. His hands grabbing onto Jeremiah, pulling him closer as he looked at him desperately.

"Please, don't do this. You and I were set to marry a-anyway-."

"But Jeremiah is the one who ended it."

Ivan looked back at his father, seeing his arms folded. He was tired of looking at his face and was tired of him being around.

There was no more trying to pretend like he respected whatever he was saying right now.

"So?"

"So that means he has to be the one to reinstate it. You didn't end the marriage, he did. Therefore, he gets the right to decide if he'll marry you, or the person he was with before, Tate."

Already, Ivan felt worse.

Jeremiah wasn't looking at him anymore but he was under much more pressure. He didn't want...to say yes to Tate and let him think he has more of a chance. He didn't want to do that to him...he cared about him too much.

While at the same time, because of Tate doing this, he's now put him in this predicament. A predicament he didn't want to be in.

"If...I marry Tate, will that reinstate the lost respect some people lost for you because of the incident with Ivan?" Jeremiah questions him quietly, seeing his father frown. "Or...will it if I marry Ivan, since he is your son and he was the first person I was supposed to marry in the first place?"

"I think you already know that answer."

Jeremiah found himself...unable to even say a word.

He already knew the answer.

"I will reinstate the marriage with Ivan, because I won't put Tate or me in a predicament that will only harm the both of us in the end. I'll just...do this, for your sake and Luka." Jeremiah sighed, Ivan beginning to nod excitedly.

Unaware that Jeremiah was upset beyond recognition.

Because once again, Ivan was getting his way and Tate was right. He didn't want...Ivan to think all was forgiven, because it was not.

If anything, this made him more angry.

He didn't need to look at Ivan's face to know he was smiling at his choice. A choice he knew...he felt he did for him, when it was not.

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♡˗ˏ✎*ೃ˚🍌:;

↳ ❝ [ i will be updating this once a week (all depends, but at least, every five days). i want to keep people wanting more- 🙇🏽‍♀️. did i succeed? ] ¡! ❞

good going Tate.

now look what'cha did! 🙄

it would've gone smoothly-

if he had kept his mouth shut.

or would it have? 🤡

so fun.

what'd you think?

vote, comment, follow~✨

- yolo🍖