thirteen

back in his reality...

***

Ivan shot up from his bed again, but this time felt the bandage on his head. He began to smile excitedly at the idea of seeing Jeremiah again.

Because he was still laying in his bed, but he wore different clothes now. Even felt clean...and he already knew it was because Jeremiah took care of him.

He tossed the sheets back, about to rush to Jeremiah's bedroom until he heard someone breathing. When he stopped and looked, Jeremiah was dozing off here and there in the chair. His eyes softened upon him, walking until he stood right before him.

Sitting on his legs before Jeremiah, he looked up at him in admiration. The idea that someone like him cared so much for him...wasn't something he could get used to.

Especially when he was aware of his behavior...he couldn't fathom where the love lied.

Jeremiah began to rile some in his sleep at the possibly scent of Ivan. His scent smelled closer, and it awoke him slightly. When he opened his eyes, he saw Ivan on the floor before him with a sweet look in his eyes.

He almost wondered if he was imagining things as he looked over at the bed. Only to see that it was empty and rose up immediately.

"Why are you on the floor?" He asked Ivan nervously, gripping his shoulders gently as he lifted him onto his feet. Cradling his face, he looked at him closely. "Is something the matter?"

Once he asked if he was okay, Ivan shook his head no.

"Why? What's wrong? Please don't be sad." Jeremiah begged him, only for Ivan to pull away from him.

He pulled Jeremiah to the bed, where he pushed him down onto it. When Jeremiah turned around to look at him in shock, he saw the pained look on Ivan's face.

"I..." Jeremiah sat up slowly, about to reach for him nervously. "If I did anything to hurt you, please tell me-."

"It's not you!" Ivan exclaims in frustration.

Jeremiah fell silent, his hand dropping back to the bed. He looked at him silently as he saw Ivan's face become red with frustration.

"It's me...it's always been me. I'm an Omega...I know this, but I couldn't accept it for so long! If I wasn't one, would we have created Luka? The best thing we both made together?" Ivan asks him softly, seeing Jeremiah lower his eyes. "You were meant to be an Alpha, it's so obvious. You...don't have to try to be something, I always tried to be this 'perfect' Alpha. I emulated what I believed an Alpha was, but was never being it naturally. While for you...it's always been natural. Even if it felt unnatural to you, it was a natural thing. You never even realized how...good you were at being an Alpha.

"And it's all because of me. My jealousy and disbelief had me bullying and abusing the one person who loved me most. I want to say I'm-."

"Don't."

Ivan frowned, watching the way Jeremiah's eyes set back onto him.

He looked at him with utmost seriousness, shaking his head. "I don't want you to apologize to me. I'm not asking you, I'm telling you, don't apologize to me."

"You're...telling me not to?" Ivan began to become frustrated by such a thing, watching Jeremiah's eyes not falter. "This is what you choose to tell me not to do? I'm trying to apologize because you deserve to hear it! Why are you keep denying me this?"

Suddenly, Ivan saw Jeremiah stand up from the bed. His look, stance, aura...all intimidating Ivan somewhat. Except he tried to mask that intimidation.

Until Jeremiah wrapped his arm around Ivan's shoulder, beginning to walk him over to the balcony he fell over. Once outside and looking over, Ivan looked over and saw where he fell...where he should've died.

Stepping back against Jeremiah's body, he swallowed, "Why'd you take me out here?"

"I have flashbacks of you falling over and me being able to do nothing. I was too slow, missed your fingers by a millisecond," Jeremiah gripped Ivan's shoulders firmly, bringing his body against his, "It's because of me-."

"It isn't!" Ivan turned around, looking at Jeremiah angrily. "You didn't yank away from you, I did. I was being ridiculous that day, and I was always ridiculous to you. Why can't you see that...you're too good for me? I was horrible to you."

Ivan watched Jeremiah's eyes narrow. Unaware of how frustrated Jeremiah was.

Jeremiah didn't want to hear him apologize because he loved Ivan so much. It didn't matter what he did to him, because he still loved him.

The way he was now...he wasn't doing the same things. So he didn't understand why he needed to hear such an apology. Especially knowing how much Ivan hated apologizing, but...

Jeremiah also couldn't understand some things.

He was naturally like an Alpha, Ivan says...but Jeremiah didn't feel that way whatsoever. The labels upon every little thing was what drove him crazy. Because it didn't mean anything for him.

Being an Alpha and not an Omega wasn't the end of the world, and Ivan being an Omega instead of an Alpha wasn't either. Except he didn't understand why it seemed to be...

"I can tell you don't understand why I'm not letting you apologize."

"I don't understand, you're right. What if I...demand you to let me do so?"

"I won't listen to that demand." Jeremiah admits instantly.

"This is what I'm talking about, the you right now," Ivan looked up at Jeremiah as he could smell how serious he was within his pheromones. "You become an Alpha so naturally when it comes to-."

"You."

Jeremiah and Ivan just looked at one another, Ivan's heart beginning to beat quickly.

"I love you so much that it hurts me physically when someone speaks ill of you. Your pain is my suffering, and your happiness is my everything." Jeremiah gripped Ivan's shoulders as he pulled him close, their faces inches apart. "Even if you were supposedly so mean, so cruel, so horrible, hurting me... I will always love you. You could throw me over this balcony and I'd still love you because it was your choice. Any choice of yours, I love."

"Jeremiah..." Ivan whimpered.

Caught up in the stares, Ivan wondered how much more he could do. Because Jeremiah was fully committed to his word.

It didn't seem to matter...even if it had hurt him. That was something Ivan could not settle with anymore. It left him feeling like shit.

"I love you," Ivan breathed, wrapping his arms around Jeremiah's neck as he drew him down closer to him, "that's why I want to do this. Let me...do this. Let me apologize to you. Please, I beg of you."

"Please don't beg from me, I will let you do anything but say sorry. I just can't let you..."

"But why?"

Jeremiah grinned, not saying a word.

Ivan waited for him to say, but the longer he was left in silence, the more he realized he wasn't getting a response. He was about to walk around him and head inside with defeat.

Except as he drew closer to the door, he felt Jeremiah's arms wrap around his waist. Pulling his body against his, he was stunned.

He could see them in the glass reflection, Jeremiah's eyes already looking directly into his through the glass. Feeling his lips and warm breath go over his ear, he had to force down the hunger..the want, the desire.

"Even when we were young, you had your moments of cruelness, but it was never towards me. It was always towards those who sought to hurt me," Jeremiah breathed, his hand going down Ivan's body until his hand settled over his dick. Groping him, Ivan didn't even know what to say, "I'm emulating what I saw you do for me. You're my role model, Ivan. Protect the one you love as much as you can...and I am. I want to do so much for you, but I know I can't."

Ivan's breathing became heavy as Jeremiah's hand continued to grope him. Yet he could feel Jeremiah's own dick harden against his lower back. He could smell the desire Jeremiah had for him, and how much stronger it grew.

Hints of love dashed within, leaving his heart pounding.

"You're doing so much right now. Being so kind to me when I don't deserve it." Ivan tells him, but that wasn't what Jeremiah wanted to hear.

He let his hand go into Ivan's pants, going to the back. His fingers reaching until he felt how wet Ivan was. Letting one of them push inside, Ivan moaned softly to him.

Jeremiah stuck his finger all the way in, pressing against the one spot he knew Ivan liked. Watching Ivan's back arch and exhale a soft moan, he found himself in that mesmerization.

He let another finger go in, beginning to thrust within. Ivan's hand clutching the arm that went around his chest to keep him up.

"I don't know who told you you didn't deserve my love or kindness, but they were wrong for saying it. You deserve everything and more." Jeremiah licked behind Ivan's ear, bringing his body closer into his as he began to thrust faster. "I mean that-."

"N-No..." Ivan whimpered, trying not to lose himself in Jeremiah's words. "I don't. Don't lie."

"I'm not lying."

Ivan managed to allow himself to grab Jeremiah's hand. Stopping him from thrusting further before he came, he felt tears well up in his eyes.

"You're lying to yourself." Ivan pulled away, holding onto the hand that was just inside of him. He turned around and faced Jeremiah now, looking into his eyes. "You're lying to yourself that I'm a good person-."

"But I'm not! You just don't seem to believe me." Jeremiah cried out, becoming frustrated now.

They both looked at each other in frustration, Ivan letting go of Jeremiah's hand that was just inside him. He went back inside as Jeremiah stood there, almost unsure of what just happened.

What happened to him?

He denied Ivan and didn't let him do what he wanted. Even when Ivan asked questions, he kept telling him he didn't want an apology. That he was okay, because he was.

He didn't want Ivan to think he was a horrible person...except now he was focusing on the feeling.

The feeling of wanting to do anything to make Ivan happy. The idea that someone planted the idea in his mind that he was a horrible person upset him.

Unaware that it the one he prayed to the most, that did.

His hand clutched his chest, feeling the pain and anger that arose from knowing Ivan was hurting. Even after hearing what he was hearing and knowing what he was knowing...it wasn't really doing anything.

He didn't care he was treated horribly, even though he should've.

That wasn't him at all.

It was a strong urge...to just protect Ivan, even if he wasn't protecting him.

When he rushed inside, he saw Ivan on the bed. Except he saw Ivan on his stomach, his hand back where his hand once was. Watching his fingers thrust within himself, Ivan was still smelling Jeremiah's scent all over him.

He was getting aroused from the scent as he saw Jeremiah finally come in. His eyes staying only on his despite what his hand was doing.

Even with the seriousness of the conversation, he still ended up aroused. That arousal permeating throughout the room as Jeremiah walked towards him.

Ivan watched him crouch before him and the bed, looking only at his face. The face that was becoming shameful to him just watching.

Jeremiah didn't want to touch him because he still believed he wasn't able to. While at the same time, he wanted to...badly. There were so many conflicting feelings towards this...towards Ivan.

But not on the hard stuff, but on the stuff that made him feel good. He just wanted to make him feel good unapologetically. While still...he waited for permission once again.

"Why...are you just watching me?" Ivan breathed, groaning when he felt himself getting closer.

He saw how hard Jeremiah was could see the tip making a mess of himself in his pants. Leaking precum, he looked back at Jeremiah's face that remained calm.

"Don't tell me you're still...thinking you can only watch and not touch me?"

"Yes...that is what I thought, actually." Jeremiah admits quickly, inhaling when Ivan sat up.

Ivan didn't even know what to say. Now he wanted to take orders when out there, he wouldn't even take the order to at least listen to his apology. That annoyed him as he turned in Jeremiah's direction, spreading his legs apart.

So that Jeremiah could see what was happening below fully, he stuff his fingers back inside. Except Jeremiah's eyes remained trained on his face.

"Look... L-Look down at what I'm doing to m-myself." Ivan demanded, watching Jeremiah's eyes look.

He saw him watch his fingers thrust repetitively within his hole. Aware of how deep the desire can run...he remembered when he and the Jeremiah from the other reality had sex... He knew that Jeremiah had that lust and craving for him too.

So much to the point that he is overwhelmed and has full control over him. That's what he wanted to see from him, at any costs.

He wanted him to hear his apology, and to also bring his Alpha characteristics upon him.

Jeremiah, however, was becoming wanting. His dick began to hurt so much that he knew he was close to cumming. Just from watching, the smell, the way Ivan looked... It was enough to take him there.

He saw his hole that he found to be pretty, continuously be teased. Fingers going in and out as it touched Ivan's favorite spot. His mouth watering to the idea of being able to...

"I know you want...to do something," Ivan breathed, Jeremiah peering up at Ivan's face that was full of desperation, "you can do it."

At that, he brought himself closer, hooking his hands under Ivan's knees as he pulled him to the edge of the bed.

He spread his legs apart more, his fingers spreading him apart as his tongue delved in.

Ivan's back arching, his lips trembling to Jeremiah's hand holding onto his waist tightly. He felt Jeremiah pull Ivan's own fingers from inside, feeling him lick them clean. That action as Jeremiah's lips wrapped around the finger and could feel his tongue lick the wetness off.

When he finished he slammed Ivan's hand onto the bed, pulling his hips closer to his mouth. Ivan bit his lip, beginning to smile as he loved feeling Jeremiah's tongue there.

Except...he was too slow, too soft, and too gentle.

He wanted more.

"Give me more...give it all to me." Ivan breathes, pulling his legs up more to expose himself further. "I want you...to give me everything you have. Unleash your passion upon me."

When Jeremiah heard that, he felt something within him begin to get hot. It was a feeling he felt when he was on his rut...but he knew he wasn't having one any time soon.

That urge...the 'Alpha' urge was being felt. Such an overwhelming sense to overtake Ivan and do what he wants to him, for him, upon him...

He disturbed himself.

"W-Wait!" Jeremiah stopped, pulling himself back so fast. Panicked by that heat within himself, he looked at Ivan who sat up and looked at him hungrily. "I...I'm too aroused. Let me...clean up."

"I told you to unleash that upon-."

Jeremiah didn't listen to the rest as he ran out, unaware of Ivan's glare set on him. Because that behavior now no longer appeased him, it made him hate himself even more for ever thinking Jeremiah's timidness was acceptable.

He...was going to do anything to change that.

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♡˗ˏ✎*ೃ˚🍌:;

↳ ❝ [ i will be updating this once a week (all depends, but at least, every five days). i want to keep people wanting more- 🙇🏽‍♀️. did i succeed? ] ¡! ❞

you better.

it's kinda...needed?

Jeremiah is a conundrum, but-

so is Ivan so... 🌚

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- yolo🍖