Chapter 10: Lobotimite meet Princess
Don't kill your love interest [LitRPG, Progression Fantasy]
Back in the alley
Kaz surveyed the street like a general watching his armies march.
Whispers were spreading.
People chuckling, people frowning, people looking at the cobbles under their feet like theyâd just noticed them for the first time.
Good.
It wasnât about the buttons, it was about getting them to talk. Getting them to think.
And if a little chaos came of it, all the better.
Kaz was halfway through congratulating himself when he saw her.
A girl about his age, standing by a scorched-out teleportation circle with the kind of expression normally reserved for people who had just misplaced their castle.
She wore a cloak that might have worked as a disguise if it werenât embroidered with silver thread and lined with silk.
The hood was pulled up, but not enough to hide the wild golden curls spilling out in rebellious spirals.
She looked like a princess playing dress-up as a beggar and doing a horrible job of it.
Kaz adjusted his hat, straightened his coat, and sauntered over with the kind of swagger that usually only belonged to con artists and bards who were very bad at being humble.
âKaz Swindleton,â he announced, offering a bow that was a little too dramatic to be sincere but just sincere enough to be charming.
âAge ten. Professional nuisance, aspiring legend, and temporary governor of all cobblestones. Pleased to make your acquaintance.â
The girl blinked, clearly fumbling through a mental checklist.
Kaz watched her lips move silently, likely running through an elaborate backstory, a web of names and reasons and motives, some grand design concocted with the intelligence of a prodigy and the practical sense of a particularly ambitious cat.
Kaz held his smile, patiently waiting for her to finish whatever masterpiece of a lie she was sculpting.
He had to admire it, really.
There was something delightful about someone who planned their deception like it was an art form.
Finally, she seemed to settle on an answer.
She lifted her chin, took a breath, and declared:
âI am⦠uh⦠Cabbage. Yes. Cabbage⦠Flowerpot.â
And somewhere, hidden in the gears and pulleys of the city, Fate began sharpening its teeth.
Leonor had been planning for this moment.
Not just planning, preparing,
the way generals prepare for war,
or particularly ambitious cats prepare for grand heists involving entire fish markets.
Sheâd spent the better part of a week in her room with nothing but a chalkboard, twelve books on regional dialects, and three very confused servants who had been sworn to absolute secrecy.
The plan was flawless.
It was intricate.
It involved several layers of deception, at least one fictitious uncle in the Ministry of Waterways, and a completely fabricated boarding school called Saint Appledownâs Institute for the Magically Adequate,
which she thought sounded just realistic enough to be ignored by anyone important.
All she had to do was say it.
Which is why, when Kaz Swindleton extended his hand and introduced himself with the sort of theatrical flair usually reserved for bards and men about to be arrested,
she panicked.
âI am⦠uh⦠Cabbage. Yes. Cabbage⦠Flowerpot.â
Kaz blinked at her,
the grin on his face widening like heâd just been handed a joke with no punchline and a thousand possibilities.
His hand was still extended, but now he looked more like he was presenting her with a particularly curious riddle.
âPleased to meet you, Miss Flowerpot,â he said,
shaking her hand with all the gravity of a diplomat sealing an international treaty.
âI must say, itâs not every day you meet a Flowerpot.â
Leonor,
no, Cabbage,
she had to remember that now,
straightened her back and gave what she hoped was a dignified nod.
âYes, well, there are⦠a lot of us.â
Kaz raised an eyebrow. âFlowerpots?â
âYes,â she said, nodding too vigorously. âAbsolutely brimming with us. You can hardly walk through the, uh, the Academy of Arcane Studies without bumping into one.â
âReally?â Kaz said,
Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
the grin now stretching into something nearly feral.
âAnd would that be Saint Appledownâs, by any chance?â
Her eyes went wide. âHow did you,â
âOh, I make it my business to know things,â he said breezily.
âAnd also, you muttered it under your breath just now.â
Leonorâs cheeks flushed pink. âDid not.â
âDid too.â
â...Fine.â
She squared her shoulders and tried to summon the regal bearing sheâd been practicing in front of her mirror.
âIâm here on⦠important business. Magical research. Brindlwardâs mana turbulence is,â
â,a nightmare,â Kaz interrupted,
nodding with such gravity youâd think heâd been studying it his whole life.
âHorribly unstable, especially near the ports. I saw what happened with your teleportation circle.â
Leonor blinked. âYou⦠you did?â
Kaz leaned in conspiratorially, eyes glimmering with mischief.
âBurned itself out right proper, didnât it? Mustâve been some shoddy spellwork. Or maybe,â
he gave her a look that was equal parts amused and daring,
â,someoneâs not too good at moderating their mana flow, eh?â
Leonor's mouth opened and closed in rapid succession.
Sheâd never been accused of bad spell work before.
At least, not to her face.
âThatâs not, it was a turbulence pocket!
The mana stream fluxed right as I was casting, and the spell rebounded off the,â
âSure, sure,â Kaz interrupted again, waving his hand dismissively.
âHappens to the best of us. No need to be embarrassed.â
He grinned, leaning back and crossing his arms.
âBut Iâve got to say, itâs brave. Very brave.
I mean, coming to Brindlward of all places to study mana turbulence? You must be practically fearless.â
Leonor hesitated.
It⦠did sound good when he put it like that.
Kaz wasnât finished.
He started pacing in front of her like a salesman pitching snake oil.
âI mean, not just anyone would pick the one place in the whole of Ferenwyld where magic goes all wibbly-wobbly and think,
âYou know what? Iâll just set up shop here. Study it. Solve it even!ââ
He stopped dramatically, throwing his arms wide.
âWhy, I think you might be a visionary, Miss Flowerpot!â
Leonor found herself nodding.
She was fairly certain sheâd been insulted somewhere in there,
but it was buried under so much enthusiasm she couldnât quite dig it out.
âThatâs⦠exactly right,â she said,
with the kind of conviction that only shows up when youâve been given a much better story than the one you had planned.
âIâm here to study it! Study the mana turbulence and⦠and come up with a solution!â
Kaz clapped his hands together.
âBrilliant! Thatâs what I like to hear! A bit of ambition, a bit of pluck!â
He paused, tapping his chin.
âCourse, youâre going to need a guide. Canât just wander Brindlward alone, not with the Smugglers about.â
Leonor stiffened. âSmugglers?â
âOh yes,â Kaz said, nodding sagely.
âYou didnât think that teleportation circle was just for decoration, did you?
Itâs part of the Brindlward Network.
Unofficial, of course.
But they get right uppity if you burn one out. Bit possessive, that lot.â
Leonor's eyes widened. âI, I didnât know,â
âBut!â Kaz announced,
cutting off her panic with the flair of a stage magician,
âI could be persuaded to act as your guide. Help you navigate the, er, local politics. And in returnâ¦â
Leonor narrowed her eyes. âIn return?â
Kazâs grin grew wider.
âYou help me fix that teleportation circle before the Smugglers notice.
Shouldnât be too hard for someone studying mana turbulence, right?â
Leonor straightened her back,
lifting her chin with as much dignity as she could muster.
âOf course. Thatâs⦠thatâs nothing. I could fix it in my sleep.â
Kaz leaned back, hands behind his head, and gave a low whistle.
âA magical prodigy and brave enough to wander the Brindlward alone?
My, my. I do pick âem.â
Leonor glared. âAre you mocking me?â
âAbsolutely,â Kaz said cheerfully.
âBut only because I like you. So what do you say, Miss Flowerpot? Partners in crime?â
She considered him for a moment,
eyes narrowing as she took in his too-big hat, his ridiculous coat, the pockets that jangled with buttons.
He looked like a prank that had somehow gained sentience.
And yet⦠he also seemed to know what he was doing.
Or at least how to make it up as he went along.
Which, in her experience, was sometimes just as good.
Leonor stuck out her hand. âPartners.â
Kaz took it, shaking with dramatic flourish.
âSplendid! Now, letâs go fix that teleportation circle before someone starts asking questions.
And after that,â he flashed her a grin full of promises and mayhem,
â,letâs cause some trouble.â