45 - Forever

Warning: Not Edited.

Diya pov

With my whole will power and strength, I hugged him tight as much as I could.

Mistakes were done on both of our sides and I have taken it too far than I can take and the result he is walking out of my life permanently taking my breath with him. Seeing him in this broken state is killing me.

How can I say my Arjun is dead to our son? If he is dead then I would die the next second.

"sorry Arju" I cried on him hugging him from behind, I cried my heart out unable to tolerate the pain I had these days without his presence beside him, the tears of pain left my eyes not able to glance at him for hurting him the most of not letting him touch his child.

"I was angry Arju, I am sorry" he didn't pay any attention to me nor his body stiffen like he always reacts to my hug.

Taking my hand from him I turned him towards me grabbing his shoulder to look at his face after months I am seeing the same emotionless face which I happened to witness during our early marriage days.

Failing to control my tears I spoke to him, "please talk to me Arju.." I said holding his hand.

His jaw tightened in reflex, "I am getting late"

The thought of him again leaving me is stabbing my heart, "you promised me forever" I cried gripping his hand tight with the fear of him leaving me.

"my death did part us"

I shook my head crying, "sorry Arju... my anger blinded my eyes"

He took my hand from his not looking at me, "it's not anger it's the amount of trust you had in me" saying this he started to walk towards the gate, I ran behind him.

"okay I did wrong whatever I did was wrong but don't leave me Arju... we need you"

He took a bag from the car, "you already found someone to look after you both and there won't be any necessity for me anymore"

In anger I turned him towards me gripping his shirt inserting the ring on his finger, "this ring always belongs to you and we both don't need anyone apart from you" I shouted angrily.

He tried to remove it back but I stopped him, "why are you keen on leaving me Arju? do you know how much I missed being near you? At least for once you never had wished to see me?"

"For what? Taunting me or blaming me for trying to kill my child?" he asked in a soft tone, "your silence gave me answers at that time Arju what more can I do? You never defended our statements and you agreed you gave me the tablets what more can I do?"

"But I gave you every explanation you expected before leaving you listened to every word and mocked me expressing all those as a lie. You sided for a man who sold many women in the market, for the man who killed your grandparents, mother, and my son for money, you witnessed everything in your own eyes yet you sealed my love and care as a toxic one" my legs trembled in fear, "every time I take a step to make our relationship in a correct path you took 5 steps back"

"What more I can do when my father is killed brutally with an unrecognized face... you had blood on your shirt ho..." he interrupted me still in his unshaken blank look, "that's the exact reason I gave you 7 months to think properly, I heard a woman needs her husband's presence beside her during her pregnancy but you didn't, now can I know what made you come to me all of a sudden?"

"Why are you speaking like this Arjun I missed you more than you can imagine..." he laughed mockingly making me cry more, "I saw at the hospital how you missed me" his words are squeezing my heart painfully, he throws something side the car and shut the trunk of it heavily in anger, I gripped his hand, "sorry Arju"

His head snapped in my direction angrily, "if you are worried about me then you might have understood my pain when you refused to let me touch my son or your love came back to you after I throw all the assets to you?"

I hugged him stopping his speed to a maximum that I can, "Don't talk like these Arju you are hurting me" he yanked me away from him with a force that hurt my arms, "I stopped hurting you months ago. You don't know how much I am hurt for seeing my unborn child and wife from far like a third person or you won't be hurt enough when my love don't want me to see the symbol of my love"

"and I am more hurt than you ever did when you threw money on my face that morning" I yelled equally as his tone, "have you gone deaf when I told the reason that day? You were under attack if I took a step towards you, 8 men had you at their gunpoint you fool what more do you expect from me? Your life felt more important to me than the hatred you was about to throw on me"

I wiped my tear, "what would you have done if I took my life that time?" his jaw clenched, eyes red, "answer me now, what would you have done if I killed myself"

"My love is not weak and after that incident, I placed 15 of my guards around you every time" he stretched the word 'My love', "are you saying my love is weak?" I asked clearly showing my pain.

He seethed venomously, "any doubts in it?"

"It was strong even when you stayed silent when Meera's father wanted your engagement to happen to her" even today I feel pain thinking about him with another woman.

"Yeah until that day everything we both had vanished away, I asked you to have trust in me the same day yet you didn't" I hit his chest not accepting his statement yet I know he is speaking the truth, "but if your love is strong why are you... leave... leaving me?" my whimper was too low for him.

"Trustless relationship is a sky without the moon. Just a black space furthermore I won't interfere in your newly founded life"

Forming all the anger in one activity I slapped him hard on his face making him stunned yet he maintained a calm face, "if you pair me with another man even in your dreams I swear I will not hesitate to kill you Arjun, going one day out to have dinner with a man doesn't mean I am willing to start my life with him" he tried not to avert his eyes from mine gaining his blank look, "what more do you expect from me when you were doing all the efforts to break my trust on you? what can I do when seeing you proposing a girl in front of me don't you know how much I would have hurt that time?"

"that's what I am saying Diya, I will never stand up for my past deeds but if you saw the surroundings that day you would have understood everything that happened that day was a lie it was an arrangement to fool her father and you never gave any chance to let me explain" I was not in a sense to watch things around me, "every time we had a problem I begged you for an opportunity to explain. You came yourself, condemned me for our child and you left yourself. Recall properly what time did you gave me to explain"

I cried shaking my head, "everything was blunted to my eyes and... and they felt real and true" he ran his hand through his hair, "you asked me any explanations like I am doing now?" I shook my head wiping my tears, "I was beaten, bruised, blunted but never felt broken until yesterday. When you told me to not touch my son I became dead Diya..."

Not able to hold me anymore I hugged him placing my arms around him and cried in his chest not forgiving myself for hurting him like this, "sorry just give me a chance for us" I said still crying on his chest, "I need a break Diya from all these" he said removing me from him but I stayed in his arm hugging him more tightly.

"You can't leave me Arju... please I can't tolerate the separation again" I saw him unshakable with the courage I had in me I asked him looking into his eyes.

"Do you think you will live without me?"

"Yes"

"do you think I lost your trust?"

He nodded with irritation, "yes"

"You don't want to give our love another chance?"

With gritted teeth, "yes" he said averting his eyes from me. He couldn't even look at me. I see him slipping away from me.

"My thoughts will never cross you?"

"never" how I wish to be in right sense yesterday...

"You love our son right?"

The twinkle on his eyes told me stories, "yes"

"hold on a minute. I promise I won't stop you" saying I went inside the house taking our son from Yaashvi stuffing some of his clothes in a bag from my room and went to Arjun.

He stood confused at me and his family who stood at my back, "hold him please" he hesitated so I took his hand and placed it under our son handing the baby to his father when I gave him to Arjun I saw a small adorable smile on his lips with closed eyes, I would never regret letting him go with you Arjun. I noticed the pool of tears in Arjun's eyes which successfully landed on my hand.

"These are some of his clothes, milk powder, feeding bottles. Mix it according to the instructions given in it with hot water, he is so adamant to sleep at night so I think you might be a watchman at nights and he loves to listen to music just like his father" my throat tightened with unexpressed words, feeling his gaze on me I replied to him looking at the bag checking whether I kept everything he needs "I don't want to hurt you anymore Arjun he will be happy and safe in your hands, raise him like you. Engrave his heart like yours" a sob stopped me, I felt a hand on my shoulder brushing it off, "at least he will have the luck to stay beside you"

With the fear of breaking down, I refused to look at my boys.

I am drowning in myself, my lungs were drowning. I had only one wish to be a part of his life again. But I know that would never happen.

While turning away from him, his hand stopped me holding my wrist gently pulling me to him. I tried to hold my tears as better as I can. Probably to give our son back to me. Otherwise, why would he stop someone like me? He will feel guilty to separate a mother and a child, "you don't need to sacrifice" told right?

"I am not sacrificing Arjun. I am doing for what I was born to live a loveless lonely life"

His eyes moved at my backside, "you have your own family" he then look at our child, "also I don't want to separate him from his loved ones and his mother and I just need sometime understand me"

Giving the smile, "your family became mine after you came into my life Arjun now what will be the use if you are not into my life? I gave our son to prove my trust in you Arjun, I trust you blindly and I am sure you won't make me blind. Now you can take as much as time you need but go with your son not alone" taking a step towards the living room I stopped in middle and turned to him who is looking at our child blankly. I know you will come to me only you take our son Arjun... otherwise, I will lose you completely.

Unable to control both my tears and words I let them both go in their way, "I love you Arju... till my last breath"

When his eyes snapped towards my direction I was fast enough to run out of his sight and ran to his room where I was staying all the while inhaling his smell. I shared the nights in loneliness and dreams of having him beside me fulfilling my cravings, handling my mood swings, pampering my adamant thoughts, feeling and watching our child's growth every day, kissing my soul through his forehead kisses'...

The more I think about him the more I feel myself immersing deep and deep into a pathless dense forest. The reality that I am going to spend the rest of my life without my Arjun and my son tore me into pieces. Hugging my knees to my chest I broke down not able to contemplate the gospel truth they might have gone by now...

"Diya..." Advik called me opening the door, I stayed still crying harder knowing he might have come here to console me for our separation. He and Yaashvi only know how much I am suffering without Arjun. They both stayed beside me with my sleepless nights, sufferings. The mood swings which had felt nothing without my Arjun.

After seeing him at the hospital reshowed me my father's face also him not taking a chance to see me these past 7 months took my anger to another level which now cost our love life in danger.

"He is gon... gone right?" I whimpered as my sobs became loud, "he is no... not affected with... without me... me Advi..." my voice laced with anger mixed with pain.

"I don't????" my sob quickly turned to hiccup hearing his voice right beside me, with a big shock of my life I raised my head and saw him sitting beside me on the floor placing his hands on his knees fidgeting with his fingers placing his sharp eyes on mine, "I thought my beard would convey my state..." saying this he stood up and stood in front of the mirror examining himself smoothing his beard.

It's a freaking dream...

I have slept too soon....????!!!!

I blinked not my eyes from him in shock... I thought he would leave with our son, to make me clear I heard our son crying sound certified me I am not dreaming... he is right beside me in the same room I am sitting.

"You haven't answered me, Do I look alike the same person I left India?"

I still can't able to come out of shock, to make it more awkward he is talking normally like nothing happened the past hour, not counting on my words I shook my head observing his body became more rigid than normal and the thick beard adding credits to his well-toned body. Overall he became more handsome except for those eyes which looked lifeless and lips that are gaining a dark shade.

"You are smoking more..." I said no expressed my anger in a low tone making him laugh, "it's the only thing that made my heart warm Diya" while saying this he took his mobile from his pocket and gave it to me indicating me to see it.

I got it carefully from him and got shocked to see my pictures during my pregnancy, "I was there every month to look after you and my champ and our family from far" that 'our family' gave me a tiny scope on him, I stood up taking a step towards him, "who asked you to be far?"

His eyes shrink, "You" he paused, "it's you who asked me to be far from you"

"That was out of anger" he took a step back, "now you know what's the problem for all of our problems... spilling words in anger, taking decisions when you are not stable is not good but you did both correctly" he taunted me, "why are you taking me, classes? you are ready to go away from me right?"

His laugh echoed the whole room as he walked towards the door letting my heart drop in disappointment.

'Your words are always enemy to you Diya'

But to my surprise he locked the door and came near me, "but I am here right?" he asked with a tight lip smile, "how long?" I asked as a tear slipped my eyes, "how long do you want me to stay?"

Sniffing my nose, "forever" I replied looking down and saw his feet a few centimeters away from mine.

"But I hide truths from you," he asked, "it's okay now I know everything"

"What if I still hide things from you?"

"You won't, even if you do, I will make you say"

I heard his small laughter but still placed my gaze on his shoes, "I am a murderer"

Shaking my head vigorously, "you are not"

"I killed your father brutally" I can sense the naughtiness in his voice, "my father is dead when he killed my mother" he hummed, "so now you started to believe my words huh?" I nodded affirmatively, "your pain told me how much truth it held," I said.

After a minute of silence, he again continued, "I am toxic" I am suing myself for uttering those words, "I was wrong this whole time" I gulped my tears, "few minutes before you were flying to move away now what made you stay" I asked out of curiosity.

Making my heartbeat rapidly he stepped another step towards me, "a girl hugged me from behind asking me to be with her...forever so I stayed" a sob happily left my lips making him take another step to reach me leaving no gap between us.

He forgave me when I stopped him...

I placed my head on his chest-beating him with my hand softly to not hurt him anymore, "you were testing?" I cried hitting him again and again leaving him giggling at my beatings.

"You have to pass another test" immediately I looked at him in fear but he had his signature smile, "don't worry you will love it" saying this he placed his lips on a mine taking me in complete surprise... for the whole day he is giving me surprise after surprise and this one made my day. I felt him placing his hand on my waist bringing me close to him taking me to another level of delight. How much I missed his warm gestures, hugs, and kisses. With happy tears in my eyes, I kissed him back running my hand on his hair. He poured all the love and the pain of separation in a single kiss and I let him do whatever he wants.

He pulled away when we both were out of breath, calming himself after our long kiss he took my face in his hand wiping my tear with his thumb, he whispered, "so my snow this heartless monster have love on you more than you can imagine, more than my life I think my snow and family is precious to me adding my son to this list I will do anything to protect you all" I stopped him, "I won't stop you from protecting us but don't forget my life resides on you"

He nodded bending himself to my lips again but stopped midway looking into my eyes, "I love you Diya" his words took a second to reach my brain, this is the first time he is using these three words to me, "can you repeat it?" I asked not digesting it.

He smiled and placed his lips on my eyelids, "I love you" my heart thumped in excitement.

"Again"

He laughed kissing my cheeks, "I love you my snow" I felt jumping in happiness, "Again"

Faking anger he bites my cheeks softly and whispered, "I love you my idiot snow" and placed his lips on me again carefully lifting me off the floor to deepen the kiss which I happily reciprocated.

So....????????

How is the chapter?? Hope you all like it...

I thought to make a sad ending but one asked me not... so here it is... it will have another chapter with Arjun's family... and then an epilogue.

So dramatic right? I feel so...

SO the story is going to end...

Bye, take care until the next chapter...