40. Accept + Astrology

It's been six days since Jeffers' arrest.

Six days of it being over.

Haven and I had a long talk the night after everything went down, which had really helped me. We spent hours on the front porch swing, getting every last word out of our brains. We'd barely been able to function at school the next day, seeing as we'd stayed up until 4am, but it had been worth it. We'd cried our eyes out, sobbing in each others arms, and by the time we went to bed, puffy-eyed and delirious, we had both forgiven John Parker.

Tom Jeffers? Maybe in a few more years. Or decades. But for now, we're content. We feel free, like a burden has somehow been lifted from our shoulders.

I guess the truth always has a way of coming out.

I can't believe that after all this time... a man I've hated for over a decade turned out to have love and compassion in his heart.

We'd discussed the idea of going to visit John – or Jack, or whatever the hell his name is – but quickly nixed the idea and decided to talk about it another time. Everything is still too fresh for a move that rash. We also agreed to not tell mom until we were sure she was in a good enough place to handle it.

Today is May 4th, Haven's birthday.

It's a Saturday, and all Haven had requested was a birthday party like the summer days we used to spend as kids. That means he'd invited a bunch of friends to swim in the river, attempt to paddle board, float on inner tubes, eat sandwiches with chips on them, and lots of popsicles. Then, in the evening, roast hot dogs, make s'mores and break out some fireworks. But, of course, since it's Haven's party, there's also a lot of alcohol available.

A big group of us, juniors and seniors, as well as a handful of underclassmen, have been at the river since the early afternoon. We've taken over a large section of the riverbank. Girls scamper around in tiny bikinis while the guys try to flex without looking like they're flexing. There's loud music playing, groups of people drinking and playing card games on the barely-functioning picnic tables, and the air smells warm and coconut-y. People play-fight over blow up floats shaped like donuts, pizza slices, flamingos and unicorns.

Basically, it's the most laid back, amazing birthday party I've ever been to.

This morning, Haven and I had stopped by Goldcrest Rehabilitation Centre to visit mom. We thought it would be a quick trip, but when we sat down at the table, there was an official looking man in a starchy black suit who informed Haven that because he's officially 18, he needed to sign some documents. Then, he'd receive access to his half-a-million-dollar trust account.

We'd left the Centre two hours later, and I don't know if I've ever seen Haven so conflicted. Part of him was pumped that he was half a millionaire, but the other part of him had no idea what to do with the responsibility of having access to $500,000. So, we did what any reasonable person would do. We bought an absurd amount of snacks and drinks. Literally, we'd filled two carts to the brim, and the total had ended up being somewhere around $1,000. Everything barely fit between the trunk and backseat.

When we pulled up to the party (late) and began unloading everything, people went crazy. It was awesome.

The party has been in full swing for several hours, and I can't believe how much fun it actually is to just listen to music, soak in the sun, drink cool fruity drinks and hang out by the rippling water. And snack like my life depended on it, of course.

Life is good.

I lift up the waistband of my blue bikini, checking my tan line, and notice it's actually coming along quite nicely.

Presley and I have been laying out on our towels, both hoping to get a head start on our golden glows.

"Fal," Presley says suddenly, reaching over and slapping my arm. "There's Haven."

I glance up to see Haven stumbling away from a group of guys playing sand volleyball. He's heading toward the snack table. I wanted to wait until he was drunk to give him his present, in order to get the best reaction possible. I fish an envelope out of my bag and head toward Haven.

Jayce whistles at me from the sand volleyball court, fans his face then pretends to faint, but really he just falls into two other guys, knocking them both to the ground. I giggle and wave back at him with my fingers all together, like a queen.

"Hav!" I announce as I reach the shaded table, where Haven is currently stuffing his face with hot fries and Oreos, at the same time. Gross.

"Whabpsup?" He asks as crumbs fall from his full mouth and he tries to keep himself from laughing. He lifts a red solo cup to his lips and takes a gulp of some combination of alcohol that I can smell from here.

I can't help but giggle. The fact that he's drunk is going to make this so much better.

"Happy birthday, big brother," I cheer, holding the envelope out to him.

"What's this?" He asks, taking the envelope. His eyes widen and his jaw falls open when he sees the sender. Brixton University.

The letter came in the mail yesterday, so I'd hidden it from him and immediately called to check if he had been accepted. He has been, but he doesn't know that yet.

"Oh, god," he breathes, his eyes wide. "Oh, god, Fal. What if I don't get in? What if they denied me?"

"Just open it!" I encourage, unable to keep myself from bouncing up and down on the spot. I sneak open the camera on my phone and hit record.

Slowly, so slowly, Haven opens the envelope. He pulls the letter out and unfolds it, handling it as carefully as if it were a bomb. He takes a deep breath and begins to read aloud, "Dear Haven, I take great pleasure in offering you admission to Brixton University's class of–FUCK YES!" Haven roars, jumping into the air and fist pumping.

I burst into giggles as he sprints through the party, his arms extended on either side of him like an airplane. The letter is still clutched in his hand.

"I got accepted to Brixton!" He hollers as he continues running around, all eyes on him. Everyone erupts into cheers, slapping him on the back as he passes.

I follow him with my phone camera as he runs around the riverbank, receiving congratulations from our classmates. Everyone adores Haven.

I'm still giggling like mad and filming from a distance as I watch Celia strut up to him, looking fucking flawless in a bright yellow bikini.

"Congratulations, college boy," she says, before throwing her arms around his neck and kissing him like you'd see in a rom com.

The riverbank fills with the sound of wolf whistles and cheering, while 'oooh's and laughter come from the guys.

Haven wraps his arms around Celia and kisses her back, then they break apart and Haven immediately grabs her hand, pulling her away from the riverbank, towards a dense grouping of trees. Everyone (well, mostly the guys) whoop, probably in awe of his "game."

I just chuckle and end the recording, glad that my timing worked out as well as I'd hoped. I head back to Presley, unable to keep the smile off my face. I'm so fucking proud of him. He's really going to Brixton. He did it.

I plop back down on my towel next to Presley, who is tapping away at her phone screen.

"That was so awesome," I gush. "Did you see it?"

"Of course I saw it," she says with a snappiness in her voice. "They were making out right in the middle of everything."

Um.

Presley sounds... jealous?

"Are you okay, Pres?" I ask a bit timidly.

"I'm fine," she replies quickly, without looking up.

No. There's no way.

I brush it off, because I sure don't want to ask that question and be wrong. I also don't want to ask that question and be right. That'd just be... too weird.

"Cole's been texting me again," Presley says in a sour voice.

Oh, that must be why she's acting that way. It probably didn't have anything to do with Haven.

"Really?" I ask, remembering his white-blue eyes from just a few days ago. "When was the last time you saw him?"

"That day at his house," Presley says, pulling her hair into a ponytail. "He and Tamara are separated."

"What?" I almost choke on a sip of my mango-pineapple drink. "Since when?"

"Since a few weeks ago," she tells me, taking her hair down and putting it back up again.

"Wow," I breathe, my mind reeling. "Are they getting divorced?"

Presley shakes her head. "I don't think so, I think they're just taking a break. Mayor Wright isn't happy about it. They have an image to protect, after all," Presley rolls her eyes and huffs. "There's no way she'd let her daughter get a divorce, especially from the police chief."

"How can you 'take a break' if you have an open marriage?" I wonder aloud.

Presley shrugs in reply. "That's just what he told me."

"Are you..." I hesitate, not sure how to phrase my question. "Do you think you're going to start seeing him again?"

"I don't know," Presley confesses, entwining her fingers in her lap and looking down at them. "I want to take this summer to figure myself out."

"What does that mean?"

"I mean, I want to get to know myself," Presley lifts her eyes to meet mine. She looks absolutely stunning with the sunlight shining off her smooth brown skin. "I need to figure out who I am. What I like. What I want. I feel like that's almost impossible to do if you're seeing someone," she reaches for her solo cup, taking a thoughtful sip. "Maybe I'll go backpacking in Europe or something," she shrugs, a smile breaking across her face.

My heart warms and I smile at my best friend, who might be growing up faster than me. "That sounds perfect, Pres," I beam. "I'm really proud of you."

"Thanks!" She chirps, chugging the rest of her drink then standing to her feet and pulling me up with her. "Let's go celebrate!"

~

That night, everyone collectively decides to light several small fires around the riverbank instead of one big bonfire, that way we can all eat sooner.

After hours of roasting weenies, making s'mores, running around drunk and laughing our asses off, everyone seems to be calming down. We're all huddled around the various fires.

"Tink!" I hear someone call.

I look over my shoulder to see Jayce several yards away, a huge smile on his face, waving at me like he's trying to guide a plane.

I get up and trod over to him, letting my eyes wonder all over his body as I approach. He looks way too good with his shirt off, it's really not fair.

"Come here," he smiles, taking my hand and leading me further away from the fires.

"What are we doing?" I ask as a light breeze blows and chills instantly appear on my skin. I should've grabbed my shirt.

"Look," Jayce comes to a stop near a grouping of trees and gestures to the sky.

I do as I'm told and tilt my head back to gaze into the deep night. I'm instantly in awe - we're several miles away from the city, so the stars are brighter than I'm used to seeing.

"Your birthday is July 31st, right?" Jayce asks, coming up behind me and wrapping his arms around me.

"Yep," I confirm, grateful for the heat from his firm body. "How do you know that?"

"I know stuff," he teases, then lowers his head next to mine and points upward. "See that shape there, like a backwards question mark?" He asks, tracing an invisible line in the sky. His warm breath tickles my ear and another breeze blows, sending his wild, sensual scent into my nostrils.

"Not really," I strain to see what he's talking about.

"That bright star right there is at the bottom of it," he tries again, still pointing at the sky. "It's called Regulus."

"I see it!" I exclaim, making out the backwards question mark he's talking about.

"Okay, from the bottom of the question mark draw a straight line," he moves his finger to another star, "and then from there, draw a triangle."

His finger follows the movement as I trace the imaginary lines in my head.

"That's the Leo the Lion constellation, your astrological sign," Jayce announces proudly.

"It doesn't look like a lion," I say, tilting my head and trying to figure out how the hell a backwards question mark, a line and a triangle could possibly be a lion.

Jayce tilts his head back in laughter, and my ears perk up at their favorite sound.

"It's supposed to be romantic," Jayce snickers.

"It is romantic," I assure him, twisting around to look into his brown eyes. "I didn't know you were into astrological signs and all that."

"Oh, I'm so into it," he nods quickly, his curls bouncing.

"Bullshit," I giggle, moving his curls out of his eyes.

"So, I might have Googled it," he shrugs with a teasing shine in his brown eyes.

I raise an eyebrow at him, waiting for the rest of the story.

"Aaaand I might have been out here for a solid twenty minutes looking for it before I called you over," he admits with a smirk.

"You're a dork," I smile up at him, giving him a playful shove in the chest. I glance over his shoulder, back to the riverbank. "Hey, have you seen Haven?"

"Not since he and Celia went to go fuck in the woods," he shrugs, totally unashamed.

"Oh," even I can hear how awkward my tone is.

"Pretty wild that he got into Brixton," Jayce marvels. "You must be really excited for him."

"I am," I confirm, a soft smile slipping onto my face. "He definitely deserves it."

"Definitely," Jayce nods in agreement.

Silence falls between us, and I know we're both thinking the same thing - Haven is graduating in just a few weeks... and that means Jayce is, too.

"Have you, um..." I start slowly, "have you heard from any schools?"

We've avoided this topic for as long as possible. We never outright said we'd avoid it, we just didn't bring it up. We'd change the subject whenever conversation started to flow towards the topic of college.

"I have," he responds, hesitance in his tone.

"And?"

"I got in everywhere I applied," he answers.

This surprises me. It's not that Jayce isn't smart, he's just... better with people than he is with books. I'd never tell him this, but I'd imagine that the main reason he'd been accepted to every school he applied to is due to his family. I've heard that colleges like the notoriety of having public figures in attendance.

"Have you decided on anything?" I ask, my heart rate picking up. What if he applied to a school in like... New York? Or worse, another country?

He shakes his head back and forth.

"Well," I say, breathing a sigh of relief. At least I can pretend like he's not leaving for a little while longer. "I know that I'm going to soak up every last drop of time I can get with you," I look up at him, tightening my grip around his firm torso.

"Is that so?" He smirks, his eyes glinting.

"Mhm," I nod, smiling. "I even marked off my Party Princess calendar as completely booked so we can spend the entire summer together."

His expression falters. "You... you did?" He asks, his voice slightly higher-pitched than usual, like he's trying to seem casual.

"Yeah," I answer, my heart sinking into my stomach. "I thought... I thought you'd be here all summer?"

"About that..." Jayce says softly and I can feel my nose prickling like I'm going to cry. "I'm thinking about accepting a summer-long internship with À La Mode. Felipe called about a week ago and offered it to me."

I drop my arms and push myself away from him. "And you're just now telling me?!" I ask, my voice accusatory. I want to cry and scream at him. There's a lump in my throat. How could he do this?

"Tink, it's not like I've decided anything," Jayce holds his hands up, his eyes wide, trying to diffuse the tension.

"So, you were just going to keep thinking it over and tell me when you reached a decision?" I spit, swallowing the lump.

"I just told you about it!" He defends loudly.

I take a deep breath, trying to calm myself down. I don't know why I'm so upset. Did I think Jayce and I would have the entire summer together? Yes. But am I going to get pissed at him for considering doing something that could make his career take off? No... damn it. I let out another large exhale.

"You should go," I say in surrender.

"I'm not going anywhere," Jayce steps toward me. "You can get mad at me all you want, but I'm not leaving."

"I mean to Paris, Jayce," I sigh in exasperation. "You should go to Paris. You should tell Felipe yes."

"I don't know what I'm going to do yet," his voice is soft, more like a whisper, as he moves a strand of hair behind my ear, studying my face with his intent eyes.

I gaze back at him, and even though he told me he's undecided, I can see it in his eyes... he wants to go. He doesn't want to leave me, but he wants to go. Who am I to keep him from that? From his future?

Behind us, I can hear people starting to set off fireworks.

Jayce brings his face down to mine and kisses me, but this kiss is different from all the ones before.

This kiss already feels like a memory. It feels like reaching for something that's long since slipped through your fingers.

It feels like goodbye.

~~~

Alright y'all. There's ONE MORE CHAPTER left...

What do you think is going to happen?!

Remember to hit the star ⭐

And if you're enjoying this story, please share it with others !

Also... apparently there's a clothing company called Brixton?! I had no idea! I've been running the light board for a play and this past weekend, the gal who runs the sound board, was wearing a cap that friggin said Brixton and I was like WHAAAAT. So of course I had to take a pic. It freaked me out at first, it was trippy 😂

I'm excited to read the theories of what will happen in the last chapter!

Read on. x