Chapter Thirty-Two

ASH

He sat in his office, attempting to shield himself from the pain he could feel from Keyara, concentrating on his work as best he could.

He was writing a statement to the council, as well as to Luca, in the event things went poorly in the days to come.

He needed to record his recommendations on how to move forward with the pack in the case of his death or break from sanity.

Since he had no heir as of yet, Luca would likely take over as alpha, which was what Ash had recommended to the council in his letter.

But he also knew there might be challenges for the position from among the other packs.

In his missive to Luca, he had listed who he suspected might challenge, as well as what he knew about each candidate, hoping to give his beta as much advantage as he could.

It pained Ash to map out future plans for his pack that did not include him, but he knew the odds Keyara would survive were still less than an equal chance.

Just the thought of losing her was enough to make him feel as if he were slipping out of control. He knew he would not be fit to lead if she did not make it through the full moon. For a long while, if ever again.

Some made it through the death of their mate, and in time returned to pack life and a semblance of normality, but many others did not. He had to account for every possibility to preserve the future of his pack.

He ran a hand over his face as he finished writing, leaning back in his chair and taking a deep breath. He was exhausted both mentally and physically.

He needed to get back to Key, her discomfort was becoming more pronounced, and he could no longer push it aside. ~“I’ll be there soon, love,”~ he assured her through the link.

There was no reply, and he assumed she was likely in too much pain to respond in kind. He wondered if she had even heard him through her misery.

He folded the parchments and sealed them with wax, pressing his ring into the puddle. He labeled the recipient of each above the seal, before tucking them into a desk drawer.

He rose from the desk and headed down the hall to the bedroom where Keyara was.

He found her curled into a tight ball on the bed, her hands pressed to her forehead, hiding her face. He touched her lightly, not wanting to startle her.

“I heard you come in,” she said gruffly in response. “I’m sorry, it just hurts too much to move.”

“Don’t apologize, love,” he told her gently, lying down beside her and massaging her shoulders and back.

Her muscles were tight and rigid, and he worked out the knots as best he could. He could feel despair beginning to creep into his mind, unable to bear her pain.

KEYARA

Ash’s touch helped to ease her physical agony, but his concern seeped into every corner of her mind, making her own increase twofold. She felt an irrational wave of annoyance toward him and hated herself for it.

She knew he was just worried about her, but the negative feelings seeping through the mind-link were just too much to handle in her current miserable state.

“Ash,” she started, but her voice broke harshly. She cleared her throat and began again. “Ash, I know that you love me. I can feel that.

“And I know you are worried about me. I appreciate it more than you know…” She faltered, not knowing how to continue without hurting his feelings.

“But I’m smothering you?” he finished for her, dark amusement in his voice.

“I’m sorry,” she said, tears seeping from the corners of her eyes, tightly shut against the pain. “This is just so hard already. To feel your pain on top of mine… I’m not sure I can handle it.”

She felt him wipe away her tears with the most gentle and loving of touches, which made her cry even harder.

She didn’t want to push him away but knew she needed to stay mentally strong to make it through the next week, and his pain affected her more than her own seemed to.

He pressed his lips gently against hers, and she opened her eyes, fighting against the pain it caused for the chance to look at his handsome face.

“I love you,” she told him earnestly, through her tears. She stared into his emerald-green eyes, trying to convey her feelings as best she could.

“I will make it through this,” she promised, meaning her words with every fiber of her being.

“I can’t leave you,” he told her, the pain evident in his voice. “I’m not going to make you do this alone.”

“You don’t have to leave me,” she assured him, closing her eyes again to stop the room from spinning. “I just need you to not treat me like I’m about to die at any moment. Be less of a mate and more of an alpha.”

She wasn’t sure she was actually making any sense but hoped he understood her meaning.

He laughed, but the sound lacked any real humor.

“I’m sorry,” she told him. “I’m not trying to hurt your feelings, I just…”

He placed a finger softly against her lips, cutting off her words. His lips quickly replaced his touch. When he broke the kiss, his voice filled her ears, his tone reassuring.

“I understand, Key. I can’t even begin to imagine how hard this is for you. I’ll do my best to keep my own worries from making it even worse.

“It is possible to close off the mate bond, it just takes some work. I will do my best to maintain a positive attitude.”

She snuggled against him, boosted by his acceptance of her request. “I love you, you know,” she told him softly.

He kissed her gently, before pressing his face against her mark and breathing in deeply. “I love you too,” he replied, kissing her neck.