Learning to be a friend and not a Mom when Estella's big

The next two days went by slowly,Hannah had taken off Thursday and Friday from work aswell to stay home with you because you'd still been sick and had spend the entire two days caring for you.

You'd mostly been in a toddler headspace the entire time,having trusted your caregivers completely to take good care of you,now that they'd already seen you without clothes on a bunch of times before and that you were really trusting them you weren't really caring as much about being naked infront of them anymore which had definitely made diaper changes and baths a lot easier.

Because of the diarrhea Hannah had decided to just keep you in diapers until you'd be feeling better again which had gotten her a few unhappy grumbles from you in response but you hadn't fought her on it much anymore,not like you'd done in the beginning,not after you'd realized how quickly the need for the toilet could come up with diarrhea.

The downside of that for Hannah though was that Liana had refused to change any diapers that were not just pee,the brunette and the blonde had once agreed that if they'd ever meet the right little for them Liana would handle everything that had to do with vomit and Hannah everything that had to do with poop and the brunette was stubbornly holding onto that agreement.

Since they'd decided on that a few years ago Hannah had thought that maybe things would be different now but no,Liana was insisting on keeping that agreement and Hannah couldn't really argue with that,afterall they had agreed on that way before they'd even met you.

Hannah couldn't say that she hadn't been gloating a bit when you'd vomited last night and she'd been able to call Liana over to clean it up which she'd later felt a bit bad about because it had made her almost happy that you'd thrown up just because she'd been able to sit in the armchair in your nursery with you cuddled up against her on her lap whilst she'd watched Liana clean up your vomit off of the floor.

In that moment she'd thrown Liana multiple smug looks whilst the brunette had cleaned up but afterwards the blonde had started to feel bad about having felt that way because afterall you had to be quite sick in order to throw up and you being sick was making her sad.

Liana had started to take some lactation medicine after the nursing talk but because it hadn't been that long yet her milk still hadn't come in yet,which hadn't stopped you from nursing with her before bed every night from then on though.

Today was the weekend though,Saturday morning,it was still very early and you woke up in your crib again due to some birds chirping loudly right outside of your window.

There wasn't a clock in your nursery but by the fact that it was still dark outside when you looked over to your window after having rubbed the sleep out of your eyes you could tell that it must still be early.

You were still feeling a bit sickly but much better than the last few days,you really only had a bit of a sore throat and a headache still but other than that you were feeling fine now.

Today you'd woken up big again though which was definitely a change,you hadn't been big in a few days but now you were and you were honestly a bit relieved because as much as you loved being little you also needed some time to be big and frowned upon realizing that you'd woken up with a wet diaper yet again.

This was especially annoying you right now because you were big,also you didn't know how to lower the bars of your crib down so you didn't know how to get out so that you could take it off.

Your diarrhea had stopped yesterday evening but Hannah had still put you into a diaper for the night regardless just to be safe and because you'd been little at that moment you hadn't fought her on it but now you wanted nothing more than to get out of this crib and full diaper and to shower.

You briefly considered trying to climb out of your crib but quickly deemed that to be too dangerous,afterall it was still quite dark in your room,you didn't know how high exactly the bars were,you were wearing a footie pajama which would make the chance of you falling higher and you were in a full diaper at the moment whose heaviness would definitely weigh you down,so all in all you figured that this wouldn't be a good idea because you didn't want to risk falling and getting hurt.

Knowing that your caregiver's bedroom was not far away you decided to result to the only other logical solution and started to yell out for help loudly,feeling like you needed to get out of this room right now.

"HANNAH....HANNAH!!",you then yelled at the top of your lungs a few times until you heard a door creak open and some footsteps approaching the nursery.

It was only a few seconds later that your door opened and the blonde entered the nursery with a yawn and a tired,yet confused expression on her face.

"Hey Estella,are you big right now,what's wrong?",she sleepily asked as she approached the crib,kind of feeling a bit sad about the fact that you'd called her by her actual name and not Mommy but you,Liana and her had never discussed what you'd call them whenever you were big so she chose not to say anything about it in that moment,that was something that could be talked about during the actual day time,the blonde figured as she gave you a concerned look,thinking that something must be up for you to yell out for her this early whilst you were big.

"Yes I'm big,sorry for waking you up but I don't know how to get out of the crib and I really need out,I didn't wanna climb out though cause that seems dangerous",you responded and immediately explained in a sorry tone of voice,feeling bad about the fact that you'd clearly woken her,and maybe also Liana,up.

"It's okay,M..Liana and I are here to help you,little and big and you're right,please never try to climb out of your crib,that's really dangerous,but why do you need out so badly at such an early time,it's only 4:30 am right now?",Hannah then mumbled in slight confusion,trying to assure you that you'd done nothing wrong as she picked you up,immediately realizing what the matter was though when she lifted you out of your crib and felt how heavy the diaper that you were currently wearing was.

Understanding that this might be a sore subject whilst you were big since that had obviously happened whilst you'd still been little Hannah chose not to say anything about it and just set you down onto the floor onto your own two feet and ignored the fact that you'd started to blush as soon as you'd realized that she'd realized what the issue was.

You'd also taken notice of how Hannah had almost referred to Liana as Mama but had quickly stopped herself,causing you to think that it might've been disrespectful of you to have called Hannah by her name instead of having called her Mommy even though you were big right now and shyly started to fidget with the ends of your pajama's sleeves whilst looking down at the floor shyly,averting your gaze from Hannah before asking:

"Is it okay if I call you guys by your names when I'm not little or is it disrespectful?",in a quiet tone of voice,not wanting to upset them,looking up again when you felt Hannah gently lifting your chin up with two fingers so that you'd face her.

"Estella,honey,you can call us whatever you want,we'd never want you to feel forced to call us anything that you're not comfortable with,sure it surprised me to hear you call me by my name again but if you want to do that when you're big then that's totally fine,it's all up to you,we want you to be happy and comfortable",the blonde then spoke up and softly assured you as she bored her pretty blue eyes deeply into yours with a calming smile on her face,attempting to make you feel more at ease and earned a nervous smile from you back in response.

"Thanks....I guess I'll just go with the flow then",you mumbled,your voice so quiet that it was just barely above a whisper at this point because you were a bit nervous.

"Yes that's a good idea Estella",Hannah then mumbled and stroked a few strands of hair out of your face and behind your ears comfortingly,wordlessly telling you that you had nothing to be nervous about by doing that.

Remembering why you'd yelled out for her in the first place you started to fidget with your hands again and softly mumbled:

"Well thank you for getting up and helping me get out of the crib..can I take a shower now or do I have to wait until it's a bit later so that I don't accidentally wake up Liana?",seeing the blonde's body stiffen up ever so slightly before she quickly forced herself to relax again.

Because you'd been little around them so often both Hannah and Liana were still getting used to spending time with big you and because of that didn't always know when to stop being in

"Mom mode" and to just be your friends and you could tell that it was a bit more difficult for especially Hannah whenever you were big because the blonde just had a tendency to still be very mothering towards you then even though you knew that she was trying her best to hold back on that.

"Of course you can go take a shower,don't be silly,you don't have to be afraid of waking us up,regardless of wether you're big or little,I don't think that you have any of your clothes for when you're big here though so if you want you can just borrow one of my oversized T-shirts and wear some of your shorts under it",Hannah then suggested,trying to be supportive and to not mother you right now since you weren't little.

You really appreciated this,knowing that she had a hard time of stepping back and letting you be independent whenever you were big sometimes.

After a short break of silence Hannah gently  spoke back up again.

"Well..if you need anything you know where our bedroom is..",the blonde hesitantly said,wanting to help you but also wanting to respect the fact that you were big right now.

You just silently nodded,quite unsure of what to say too because you weren't big around them often and were still getting used to that aswell.

Hannah then left your nursery and went back to her and Liana's room where the brunette was sitting awake in bed,waiting for her.

Liana had also woken up when you'd yelled out for Hannah but Hannah hadn't wanted to tell you about that so that you wouldn't feel bad.

"Hey..she big?",the brunette immediately asked once her wife entered their shared bedroom again and got a sad nod from Hannah in response.

"Yes....I know it's dumb but I feel kind of sad that she said Hannah and not Mommy,I know she's not little right now but..I don't know..I guess I just need to learn to let her be big aswell",Hannah quietly mumbled after she'd closed the bedroom door behind herself and let herself sink down onto the bed,snuggling up to Liana with a few tears brimming in her eyes.

"It's not dumb darling but you do need to let her be independent when she's not little,I know it's hard,I like being called Mama more than Liana by her too but remember,it's not about our preferences,it's about what Estella's the most comfortable with",Liana softly said as she wrapped an arm around her wife's shoulder and gave her temple a gentle and comforting kiss.

Meanwhile you'd taken off your footie pajama and had discarded of the soaked diaper with a frown on your face,already feeling much better now that it's weight was finally off of you and stepped into the shower,wincing slightly when the warm water ran over your rash,it had gotten much better over the last few days but it wasn't gone completely yet which sucked.

You tried to forget about it though and just quickly showered,feeling much more clean once you stepped out of the shower,wrapped a towel around your body,dried your hair off and brushed it out.

After that you went back into the nursery,still having a big towel wrapped around your body for coverage and quickly looked through your closet for something that you could wear which wasn't screaming little girl.

Upon realizing that you should probably apply some rash cream to yourself before getting dressed so that the rash would go away soon you stopped and searched through the drawers of your changing table but the cream was nowhere to be found.

You huffed slightly in frustration and stomped your foot,aware of the childish gesture but you couldn't help it,the one time that you wanted to do something without needing to ask for help you couldn't because you couldn't find what you were looking for!!

With a sigh you then quietly made your way over to Hannah and Liana's bedroom and softly knocked on their door,entering their room upon hearing the both of them say: "come in" at the exact same time.

Upon entering their room you were met with the sight of the both of them cuddled up together comfortably in bed and blushed slightly,hoping that you weren't disturbing anything.

"Hey uhm,sorry for disturbing you guys,I-I

w-wanted t-to ask if you know where the cream for my rash is,I couldn't find it?",you then forced out,stuttering slightly again like you'd done in the beginning of getting to know them,it was always a bit awkward for you to be big around them,especially if you were staying in their house because you didn't want to be annoying or a burden and nervously clutched onto the towel around you tightly.

Hannah and Liana's chests immediately tightened upon hearing you stutter,knowing that it was because you were nervous,so they tried their best to give off as much of a soothing vibe as possible each and both immediately gave you gentle smiles.

"Yes,hold on. I'll get it for you",Hannah just said in response and stood up,walked into her and Liana's bathroom and then came back and handed it to you with the words:

"We don't leave creams out in your nursery just incase little you gets curious and decides to look through the drawers of your changing table,we don't want to risk you opening it and putting it into your mouth and accidentally poisoning yourself",earning a slight giggle from you in response.

That was smart,truthfully you hadn't even thought of the possibility of that happening.