1. Ode to Madeline

Ode to Madeline

Madeline, oh, Madeline!

Surely you know why you’re here

It’s your birthday, Madeline!

We’ve gathered the necessary cheers

You can’t stop us, dear Madeline!

But feel free to try it if you can

We feel so madly seen!

So why don’t you kindly lend

Your ears, your arms, your skin!

It’d make a delicious brew

Garnished with Madeline’s skins!

So carefully chew, hear you?

I need a drink, get me a gin!

‘Cuz now’s my favourite part

Your Mommy, oh, dear Madeline!

Carefully chopped in carts

And bring over the bins!

Chock-full of Daddy’s yummy livers

I’ve marinated him out and in!

Fresh taste that’ll make you shiver

Oh, wait, what’s that, Madeline?!

I am a piece of Satan's spawn?

Oh, dear Jesus, Madeline!

What TV channel did you learn that on?

I’m no demon, Madeline!

I’m a humble birthday planner

I just want my work to be seen!

So now let’s roll the banner

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Made with the finest sister’s skin!

Haha, thought we forgot?

Of course, we can’t forget Sister Small-line!

Oh, “when will you stop messing with me?”

Never! Dear my sweet, cute, kind Madeline!

You’re mine, you’re mine, you’re mine!

And this will be the greatest birthday ever!

Screw rhyming!

Wait, what’s that?

You said my planning… oh god… sucks?!

Oh my Satan’s sweet Jesus, are you serious?

What?

You want…

A “cozy, Sunday morning, tea-filled, everybody alive” kind of birthday?

Well, Sweet Lord, Madeline! I don’t do refunds!

Oh, wait, what’s that?

You’ll rate me 1 out of 666 on Yelp?

OH, HELL NO.

So everybody gather ‘round!

We got a C!

Cozy!

We got a S!

Sunday morning!

And let’s top it with T

Tea-filled!

Ooh, and don’t forget the E!

EVERYBODY ALIVE!

Alright, Madeline. This is what you get.

Here’s my business card.

Next time, please research ahead of time before ordering birthday services.

I got a hell of a lot of orders this Sunday, y’know?