HUGE F BUDDIES: Chapter 4

Everything starts off great. We hang out on the deck with Steve in his place at the head of the table and his family all around him. They share memories, old and new, and I soak it all in, wanting to find out as much about my dad and my new stepbrothers as I can. Steve talks about how they bought the house five years ago as a fixer-upper. Amber has worked hard to design the interior and project-manage the renovations. Steve did a lot of the decorating work himself until it got too much, then they called in the professionals. I learn that Amber and Steve have been together for ten years. They met when Steve was coaching her sons at Little League. It sounds like it was a slow-burn romance. I get the feeling something bad happened with her first husband, and she wasn’t really up for another relationship. When Amber’s talking, she rests her hand on Steve’s arm, and I can see that their relationship is close. Even though I’m so new to this situation, I’m happy to see that.

Mostly, I’m fascinated by the boys. If this is how Maisie felt, I don’t know how she managed to get anything done. It’d be hard enough to have one sexy stepbrother, but when you get up to four, it’s hard to know where to look.

Jefferson, even though he’s the youngest, is definitely the boss. He’s got strong opinions about everything and is a business major. I can see him working his way up to CEO somewhere, and running his management team into the ground. He has a hot billionaire vibe about him already. There’s nothing I’d like more than to sit on his desk with my legs open and have him show me exactly what a merger and acquisition should look like!

Carson is the oldest, and I get the feeling he’s the battler. Steve’s pretty proud of how much he’s fought to get over numerous injuries. He’s an economics major, but he doesn’t talk about using his degree at all. It’s all about football. It’s all about the draft. I get the feeling that he’d have the most unbelievable stamina. There’s no way he’d be coming first. Perfect fuck-buddy material.

Anderson, Carson’s identical twin, is much quieter than his brother. He coaches Little League, with Steve’s help and is studying to be a sports physiotherapist. I get the feeling his twin doesn’t approve of his more laid back, people-centered approach to life, but there is a lot about Anderson that I like. He’s a giver, a man with a good heart. He’s the kind of man who’d kiss you all the way up your spine and suck on your earlobes. I shiver just thinking about it.

Brayson is Jefferson’s identical twin and the artist in the group. He’s a graphic design major and is responsible for much of the art in the house. Amber is super proud of him, probably because he takes his creativity from her. She’s less happy when he tells me about his tattoos and how he designed them all. He has a full sleeve all the way up his right arm. He pulls up his t-shirt to show me the shoulder and my heart skitters. It should be illegal for any man to have biceps this sexy. He doesn’t tell me what they’re about, though, and I don’t feel comfortable to ask right now. I know tattoos can be really personal, and it might not be something he’s happy to share in front of his family. What I do know is that he has an artist’s hands, perfect for tracing patterns on my skin until I’m begging for more.

“So what about you, Sara? We’ve been droning on about us for ages, and you’re a really great listener, but we’d love to know more about you.”

I smile at everyone, praying that my cheeks aren’t red from all my dirty thoughts. “Well, I’m an English major at Eastern. It wasn’t my first choice but they offered the best scholarships, and I’m really happy that I chose it in the end.”

Jefferson makes a grumbling noise in his throat and his brothers laugh. “She’s allowed to like her college, bro,” Brayson tells his twin. “Just because they’re our biggest rivals doesn’t mean it isn’t a good place to go.”

“Lawson was on my list,” I tell them. “Higher up than Eastern, but I would have had to fund more myself, and I didn’t want to do that.”

“Do you miss home?” Carson asks. I see Amber send him a look to tell him not to go there, but it’s already too late.

“There’s not much to miss,” I say. “Eastern’s kind of become my home. I have my friends there. They’re really great.”

“That’s good. Friends are really important. I’m still really close with my sorority friends,” Amber says. “You grow together, go through so much together. Friends are the family we get to choose.”

I nod, thinking about Maisie, Hannah, and Millie. We’ve been through a lot together, but all of it was their trials and tribulations. They still don’t know about my mom. I had to tell them about Steve because I was going to be away for so long, but I haven’t made a big deal about this trip. I didn’t want them to know how scared I’ve been about liking him or how scared I’d be to find that I don’t like him at all.

After what feels like just a little while, but it must be longer because the sun has set and my eyes are feeling tired, I catch Amber glancing at Steve.

“You look beat,” she says, resting her hand on his arm. “You should turn in now so you can be up bright and early to spend more time with Sara.”

Steve nods. “This has been a really special evening,” he says. “I’m glad that you could come.”

“I’m glad too.”

He starts to rise, using the armrests on the chair to lift himself up into a standing position. The boys all rise at the same time, which is such a mark of respect. “Good night,” he says. “You let Amber know if there’s anything you need. The house is yours. Feel free to grab anything from the kitchen, okay?”

“Thanks.”

Amber and Steve make their way back into the house, and I’m left with my stepbrothers in the yard in semi-darkness.

“So you date football players?” Jefferson asks.

“I don’t date.” I laugh, and it sounds unexpectedly nervous and girlie. I’m not a high schooler who should be fawning over these guys just because they’re hot. In fact, I’ve never fawned over a guy before in my life.

“What do you mean you don’t date? You said you were dating a baller from Eastern.”

“I said I was ‘with’ a baller from Eastern. Being with someone and dating them is a whole different ball game.”

There’s a rumble of laughter from Jefferson’s brothers, and he doesn’t look happy. I’ve made him look like he doesn’t understand anything about sex outside of relationships.

“So you’re into sixties-style free love,” Anderson says.

I shrug, a small part of me wondering whether telling them all this private stuff about me is a good idea on night one. The larger, more defiant part doesn’t accept that this should be any kind of awkward conversation. Sex is part of life, not something we should be whispering about or hiding. “I don’t give anything away for free,” I say, leaning forward and resting my arms on the table. “Believe me, I expect a whole lot in return.”

There’s another rumble of laughter and a raised eyebrow or two. “And what’s that?” Brayson asks.

I lean further forward, needing them to understand that I’m the one in control. There might be four of them, but that isn’t daunting to me. Not at all. “Do you need me to spell it out?”

Jefferson snorts, happy that his brother has fallen into the same trap as he did.

“It’s okay,” Carson chuckles. “I haven’t had any complaints.”

His twin, Anderson, leans forward. “Getting the girls because they think you’re me doesn’t exactly make you Casanova.”

“Fuck you,” Carson hisses. “If anything, it’s the other way around.”

“Come on, boys,” I laugh. “You don’t need to go all alpha on me.”

“Believe me, if we were getting alpha on you, you’d know about it.” Jefferson’s eyes narrow and his jaw ticks. He looks pissed and riled up all at the same time. Probably turned on, too. Guys are so easy to excite. A few words and a smile or two, and that switch is flicked to ON!

“Oh yeah?” Jefferson’s words sound like a direct challenge, and I’d be happy to encourage it if it wasn’t my first day under my dad’s roof. The boys all look at each other as though they’re not really sure where to go next, and to be honest, neither am I. Rather than waiting for anything more to be said, I stand quickly, my chair sliding across the stone patio noisily. “You know, I’m tired. I think I’m going to bed. Night.”

I don’t miss Carson’s open mouth or Jefferson’s smirk before I turn.

I don’t miss the flutter in my chest either at the thought of my stepbrothers carrying out their threat.

If there’s one thing I love, it’s a strong and bossy man, and it seems like I’m now lucky enough to be living with four of them. The question is, what am I going to do about it!